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				<a id="mw-mf-last-modified" data-timestamp="1494278075" href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php/Special:History//SPG/_Snippets_(/slave/)" data-user-name="HotRobotSlave" data-user-gender="unknown" class="top-bar truncated-text">Last modified on 8 May 2017, at 21:14</a>		<script>
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			<h1 id="section_0">/SPG/ Snippets (/slave/)</h1><ul id="page-actions" class="hlist"><li id="ca-edit" class="icon icon-32px icon-edit" title="Edit the lead section of this page."></li><li id="ca-talk" class="hidden icon icon-32px icon-talk"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Talk:/SPG/_Snippets_(/slave/)&amp;action=edit&amp;redlink=1" title="Discussion about the content page [t]" accesskey="t">Discussion</a></li><li id="ca-watch" class="watch-this-article icon icon-32px"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Special:UserLogin&amp;returnto=%2FSPG%2F+Snippets+%28%2Fslave%2F%29" title="Add this page to your watchlist [w]" accesskey="w"></a></li></ul>		</div>
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This page was created by a <a href="../../../User:HotRobotSlave" title="User:HotRobotSlave">bot</a> and has not undergone revision yet.
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<table class="wikitable" style="float:right">
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<td><b>Writefag</b>
</td>
<td> WritefagRises
</td></tr>
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<td><b>Pastebin link</b>:
</td>
<td><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="http://pastebin.com/CncUPtzF">http://pastebin.com/CncUPtzF</a>
</td></tr>
<tr>
<td><b>Pastebin creation</b>
</td>
<td>Sunday 25th of September 2016 01:27:33 AM CDT
</td></tr>
<tr>
<td><b>Last Pastebin update</b>
</td>
<td>Sunday 27th of November 2016 10:17:21 PM CDT
</td></tr></table>

</div><h3><span class="mw-headline" id=".2FSPG.2F_Snippets_.28.2Fslave.2F.29">/SPG/ Snippets (/slave/)</span><a href=")#/editor/1" title="Edit section: /SPG/ Snippets (/slave/)" data-section="1" class="edit-page icon icon-32px icon-edit enabled">Edit</a></h3><div>
<div dir="ltr" class="mw-geshi mw-code mw-content-ltr"><div class="gettext source-gettext">&#160;<br />-=Mare's Nightmare <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Luna<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are Luna, and you are in a room.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The air is musty and hard to breath, the single light above you is harsh, bright, and hurts your eyes, and the metal surface of the table you lie on is frigid and hard.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your emaciated body is lashed to it with many tight, thick straps, exacerbating the discomfort and making it impossible for you to move any part of your body.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Even your head has been tightly restrained into a fixed position.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Despite the harshness of the light it does not cut a wide enough beam through the omnipresent darkness to let you see anything in your limited view except for a small sliver of light visible at the back and the grimy state of the white tile floor.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can hear exactly two things, the buzz of the light and two indecipherable muffled voices in another room.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;For who knows how long you remain in this maddening, awful state of duress, the muffled voices continuing their incomprehensible conversation.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Eventually, the voices stop.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Soon after, the sliver of light turns out to be simply the light beneath a door, as said door opens, revealing two figures who step into the light.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;One is a hairy, rotund man in a sweat-stained undershirt, the other a bony old man in a stained apron.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Unlike the rotund man's undershirt the other man's apron is stained not with sweat, but old, dried blood.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He looks at your head with his sunken, shadow-obscured eyes and leans in closer to feel your forehead.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;His fingers touch the base of your horn, and he starts moving his fingers all over it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After thoroughly going over your horn with his fingers, he pulls away and leaves your sight.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Soon after you hear the squeaking of wheels as he pulls a small cart laden with various frightening looking implements in front of you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He browses through his collection before coming upon a small saw, and, finding it satisfactory, picks it up and plugs the trailing cord.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With a gentle click, the saw starts spinning, cutting through the unpleasant drone of the light above with a shrill whirr.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He brings the saw close to your forehead, then closer and closer and closer some more.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Though you know struggling will only make things worse, you cant stop your ever increasing fright from making a futile attempt to make any movement.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It, of course, fails, your body is too weak and your restraints are too strong.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your mouth tries to open and try to beg for mercy, but even your mouth's been restrained, forced shut with a tight leather strap.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you are merely able to whine as the old man brings his saw ever so carefully towards its target.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Finally, it connects, right with the base of your horn.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You to shoot up and scream, the world around you changing at the moment of impact.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The restraints are gone, the air is far easier to breath, the room is dimly illuminated by moonlight coming through the windows, and large metal table's been replaced by soft bedding.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You pant, your mind racing, and your body having broken into a cold sweat.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Quickly you realize the pain is not there, your body is no longer starved, and those two men are no where to be found.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was all just a nightmare.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But it wasn't.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was a memory you wish you could forget.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With a gentle click, a lamp comes on, and next to it is neither the old surgeon or the rotund man.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's your master.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Luna, are you all right?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;His voice is tinged with worry and concern.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You quickly give him a nod.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He's instantly relieved at your well being, his body relaxing as yours as you both realize everything is okay.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Calmly he sits next to you as you lie back down, and he lays a gentle hand on your withers.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He speaks again, but in a soft, reassuring tone.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You had a bad dream again, girl?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You nod again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You want me to stay down here with you tonight?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Again, you give him a silent nod.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He gets up off your ersatz bed, really layers of thick winter blankets and other assorted bedding piled up to create a nice soft spot on the floor to sleep, plus some spare pillows, to pick up the covers you tossed off in your panic as well as shut off the lamp.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You roll onto your side as he turns off the light and drapes the covers gingerly over you before joining you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He gets beneath the covers and worms himself right next to you, his body between your legs.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;His hand moves to your neck and he starts sliding it down, gliding his fingers through your limp mane.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Soon his hand is moving down your back, going over many old scars from many old masters.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And he repeats this long stroke constantly, his gentle hand calming and reassuring you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In spite of everything that's happened to you, the years under cruel and pitiless masters, the unmentionable things done to you, even the part of your body they took for their own ends, it will still be okay.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your master loves you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you love your master.</span><br /><br />CONTINUATION: Service to Others<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are awoken by the feeling of your master slipping out from under the covers.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Before you can get up you are then blinded by the darkness being cleared away in an instant by the lights being switched on, forcing you to close your eyes tightly to avoid the pain.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Tentatively, you slowly open your eyes as the adjust to the unexpected brightness to see your master stretching.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You waste no time in pulling yourself off your comfortable nest of bedding and sitting on your haunches, patiently waiting for your master to finish.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He does so, and then wastes no time to take a look at you as you look back at him &quot;quizzically.</span><br />&quot;Is it time to get up, master?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your master glances at the clock behind you, and you follow suit.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's about half past midnight.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A bit later than normal, but you're pretty sure today is your master's day off anyways.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Looks like it, girl.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He gives you a loving pat on the head as he heads back upstairs to clothe himself.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With that all cleared up you stand up and do some stretching yourself.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And so another day with your master begins.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, night.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In the following hours the normal routine you and your master share goes as expected.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Breakfast is made and then eaten.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You and your master get cleaned up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's somewhat hard for you, given how cozy the downstairs bathroom is, but you'd much rather use a small bathroom shower than some of the outdoor hose-downs you've been subjected too.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Then quite a bit of time is taken up by housework, and though you try to help as much as you can, your master bears most of the burden.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Hooves aren't that conductive to washing dishes or most other domestic chores, after all, and your master said he didn't want you using your tail to help him sweep the floors anymore.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He said it just got your tail dirty.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you find yourself quite shamefully idle while your master does just about everything.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, you did move a couch out of the way for him, but you don't really think that should count for much.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Eventually, though, he finishes up the housework with no help from you and sits down on his couch.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He then motions for you to come and join him, and you do so gladly, setting yourself down on the couch up close and personal to him.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And so you lay on the couch, your forelegs and head over your master's lap, and he rests his arm on top of you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Though your master has a device meant for amusement and distraction set up and active across from this very couch, you aren't paying much mind to anything accept this feeling of being loved.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Indeed, your master is quite a doting man, he's gave you a life that only a few months ago you could only have dreamed of, and for that he only asks for your companionship.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And while you are quite happy to give him companionship in any way possible, you still wish there was something more you could do for him.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Just something, anything to prove your worth.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Then, an idea comes to mind.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are [spoiler]Joe Bloggs[/spoiler].</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Exception to the rule extraordinaire.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And also you own a talking winged pony princess named Luna.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In fact, she's laying on your couch and lap right now while you watch TV, quiet and relaxed.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Then she breaks her silence and speaks up in a questioning tone.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Master?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Yes, Luna, what is it?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She sits up and frees your legs from being pinned under her legs, allowing you to properly look her in the face.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I was reading something in your study yesterday, while you were at work.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, your glad to hear she's taken the free reign you've given her of the house to heart.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And a bit surprised she's being so abnormally proactive in conversation.</span><br />&quot;Oh, really? &quot;What was it?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It was a book about, uh, horses and how they were used by humans. Like, uh, how they'd be, uh, be used for transportation.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Uh-huh.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Then Luna's calm starts to falter massively.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;A-and so I, uh,&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;As she starts bashfully stammering through her proposal she seems to physically shrink due to her frayed nerves.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I thought th-that maybe y-maybe I could m-maybe do that for you, I-if you want to.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Are you talking about me riding around on your back, like a horse?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;W-well, I heard you t-talkng about how, uh, how e-expensive it is to get around with your, uh, that car of yours. I know I-I'm pretty big, s-so I thought maybe you could, uh, you could use me to get a-around instead?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You take a moment to consider what she's saying.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But Luna doesn't wait, and takes your silence as disapproval and kowtows to you, as her master.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;S-sorry, it was a b-bad idea, master.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her voice gets quieter with each word as she tries to shrink herself in shame and submission, eyeing the couch cushions rather than trying to look you in the eye.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Honestly, her own assessment is kind of right.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You mostly use your car for getting to work, which already takes a half-hour's drive from your little house on the prairie with said car, or to buy groceries and stuff, which would bring a whole host of problems to roost if you tried to do that via horseback.</span><br />&quot;Yeah, it isn't a really good idea for me to get rid of my car and start riding around on you instead, girl.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Though you try to let her down gently, speaking calmly with a small smile, it's no use.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her mood deflates as you, her master, shoot down her attempt to serve you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, there is one more thing you have to say on the matter, and maybe this'll raise her spirits.</span><br />&quot;Though, now that you bring it up, I'd still like to give riding you a try.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Luna looks back up at you, her spirits slightly lifted.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Really?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Sure, it wouldn't be for a practical reason, but it sounds like it could be fun to do for the hell of it. Just, uh, just go for a ride across a meadow or through the woods and just spend some time outside, you know?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;And with that, she starts cuddling up against you, and you respond in kind by hugging her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh, thank you, master. I wont let you down!&quot;</span><br />&quot;I know, Luna, I know.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She's clearly happy, excited even, at the chance to do something more for you, and while part of you finds how fanatically eager she is to be a bit concerning, you snuff out those thoughts quickly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This is something that's making Luna feel happy and wanted, something that you also want to do, so you see no reason to not do it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Anyways, back to the matter at hand.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You look out the window to see the rising summer sun.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With Luna already raring to go and daybreak having come, you could actually go for a ride right now.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Actually, why don't you? It's not like there's anything good on TV at 5 AM.</span><br />&quot;Hey, how about we go for a ride right now?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I will be glad to, master!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Alrighty, then, let's go on outside, girl.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;And so the two of you are off for a nice horsie ride.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So why do y'need me to pick up yer groceries fer you fer the next few weeks, cuz?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I told you, John, my arm's stuck in this cast for the next two months until it heals up.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your cousin, scoffs through the phone receiver you hold in your good hand.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Y'still got the other'un, don't you?&quot;</span><br />&quot;You really think I can drive stick with one hand?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;His end goes silent for a moment.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You'd better have a shoppin' list ready, cuz. Now, I gotta go, Joe.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Alright, see you later.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;With a beep the call ends, and you set the receiver back onto it's cradle.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You look at the cast on your left arm.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yeah, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to just get on Luna's back and go with no preparation and really no idea what you were doing.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But you did, and so her spine gave you a formal lesson why it was a bad idea by hitting you in the balls, and then the ground gave a follow-up lesson by breaking your arm.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So it looks like your, err, lengthy and prestigious career in Equestrian equestrianism is over.</span><br /><br />-=Half-Assed and Bootlegged <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Panka Po<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be Anon, man of tomorrow</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Specifically, the date is XX/XX/20XX, X:XX PM</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Because fuck specificity</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But never-mind, genetic engineering's become popular enough to hit the civilian market!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Among the corporations looking to capitalize on this exciting tech is Hasbro, with genetically engineered little ponies.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Would be cool, you could finally have a cute mare to love forever, but there is the problem of price</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You aren't paying off some exec's private moon colony to get a pony, it's just not something you can afford</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So that's a bit of a pisser, but you found a company in Hong Kong that makes bootleg ponies</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Not sure how that works, but the pictures looked promising and the price was right, so you sent them your money and they bootlegged up a pony to send back</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now, on this date, she has arrived</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You stand in front of the plain cardboard box, anxious to rip it open and get to the pony inside.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Knife in hand, you cut the tape keeping the box shut, and gingerly open up the top.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And bursting from out of the box is...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hello human. I am quality pony of great significance, it is please to meet you.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A pony, you guess?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her, it sounds like a her, head is completely wrong, a sort of bullet shape with all of the bits of a face slapped on</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;More resembling an actual equine rather than the cute little pony you were promised, honestly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Additionally, ger mane is limited and has no volume or bounce to it, instead hanging limply on one side of her neck and leaving her head bare.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh yeah and there's also the fact that she has no ears and very noticeable stitches</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They don't even look like they're in as some sort of temporary medical measure, they look like they're a permanant part of her body.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So, overall, you aren't particularly impressed.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In fact, you might even say you're feeling disappointing, robbed, even.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Those fucking chinamen sold you a hack job of a mare.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Good for nothing-</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Wait, how long have you just been silently staring at this pony with a look of pure dissapointment?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Long enough that the smile she came out with when she popped out of the box and declared herself to be quality and of great signifigance has fallen in favor of a frown, it seems.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You... you are not believe lies yes?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her voice is quiet and saddened, seemingly able to figure out exactly what's going on in your head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I know, I am not quality pony, I am cheap fake pony, not what you want.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Whelp, not only is she poorly made, she has issues with self-loathing.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Good job Happy Horeses, LMD</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Just be rid of me, you think it too.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She starts trying to move herself to be able to get out of the box, thwarted by the small size of the box itself.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You move in to help her out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Hopefully her craftschinamanship includes being light to save on materials.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you lean into the box and manage to get your hands under her torso, and as you lift her you find that, yes, she's pretty light.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Sure, not feather light, but still probably a bit too light to be made of a good quantity of good quality whatever goes into a genetically engineered pony.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Whelp, time to get this over with.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You move her up against your chest to make it easier to carry her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She says nothing, resigned to her fate.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Time to take her to the [spoiler]couch.[/spoiler]</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You set the wonky mare down on the couch and sit next to her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She looks at you, confused.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Are you not to be rid me?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Now, why would I get rid of you?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I am not want by you.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I just wanted a pony, and you fit the bill.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She perks up at that, hopeful.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So, I stay?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You lay a hand on the top of her head.</span><br />&quot;Yes, you can stay.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She quickly moves to show her appreciation, getting under your arm, laying her legs across your lap and nuzzling your chest with the side of her head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You know what, even if she is half-assed and bootlegged...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;[bootleg nickering]</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;...she's still got the heart of a pony, and she's all yours.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This ain't so bad.</span><br /><br />And they lived cuddly ever after.<br /><br />-=Unmet Expectations <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Rainbow Dash<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are Rainbow Dash.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The awesomest pony in Equestria and slave to these stupid evil humans.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You've just been sold like a loaf of bread to some evil asshole human.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you can tell he's an evil asshole because he's in his 30s, has lots of body hair, smokes, and has a goatee.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A bucking goatee, he must be evil!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He'll probably be doing horrible things to you, probably rapey things, but you will be strong.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You will not submit to him!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You've finally got out of the box you were packed into when you got sold.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you step out into the dank dereliction of your new dark overlord's well lit living room decked out in party decorations.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Wait, what?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Before you can even figure out what the hay is going on, a voice cuts in.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Is that a pony?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Okay, why does your evil hairy monkey master sound like a little filly getting a birthday surprise?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You look at the source of the voice, and it is a...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;...a human filly?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Why would such an obviously evil man have a human filly in his house?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh dear Celestia, she's his underage sex slave, isn't she!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;That sick fuck!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, and she's all yours, sweetie.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Wait-</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;[HORRIFIC SOUNDS OF THE HAPPINESS OF A HUMAN CHILD]</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Suddenly you are hugged by the human filly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You're the best dad ever!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Wait, your master is going to be a little kid?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But you were promised a cruel goateed guy to be enslaved by, not a young child!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dammit, and even the cruel goateed guy seems to genuinely be happy at the joy his daughter is displaying.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;How the buck are you supposed to be heroic awesome free-willed rebellious mare when you have these two to rebel against?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I'm gonna love her, and feed her, and pet her, and brush her mane!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh god, please no.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The father chuckles.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, maybe you should start by feeding her, she's probably a little hungry.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The little girl leaves the room for elsewhere, probably to get food.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The girl's father walks over to you, crouches down, and stares out you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;No, stares right into your soul.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Okay, miss...&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You aren't going to give this bastard the satisfaction of knowing your name.</span><br />&quot;Rainbow Dash.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;WHAT DID I JUST SAY</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He speaks with hushed breath so that only you two may hear what he says.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Rainbow Dash, you probably don't think highly of me, given our respective roles. But I promise you, if you don't hurt my daughter, you will be fine. Understand?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You nod.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Good.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He pats your head and slinks away back to where he was before.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yeah, definitely evil.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh, the kid's back, finally giving you some reprieve from being alone with the Dadstroyer of Worlds.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, I have to go now, sweetie. You play with your pony until I get back.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Okay, dad.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And the guy tousles her hair and leaves.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now you are alone, trapped with a young child.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You want a sugar cube, pony?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A young child offering you a sugar cube in the palm of her hand.</span><br />&quot;Ok.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The sugar cube remains firmly on her palm as she looks at you expectantly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Does she really want you to just eat it directly out her palm of her hand?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;No, you will not go along with such a blatant act of submission!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But, on the other hand, sugar cubes are nice...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Come on, do you want it or not?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fine, you'll eat out of her palm for a stupid sugar cube.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you do that, nuzzling the palm of her hand as you do so.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The girl starts laughing in response.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You knew it, she laughing in triumph at your subjugation, all humans are evil, even the children!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hehehe, that tickles!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;...or your mouth is tickling her palms as you try to eat the sugar cube.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Celestia damn it all, you thought you were onto something.</span><br /><br />-=Mounted Patrol <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Lyra<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Congratulations, you are Officer Sanshiro!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you have been called into the office of your angry police chief, like you do.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Sanshiro, you're a loose cannon, I'm assigning you a partner!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Wow, that was fast, chief. You on a strict schedule or something?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, I still have to deal with the fallout from your last stunt, and there is a lot of goddamned fallout.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Really? All I did was take down an international drug ring.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;And burn down 3 warehouses and severely wound several bystanders AND destroy an innocent fruit cart!&quot;</span><br />&quot;But chief-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Don't but me, you rabid shithead, taking down that drug ring is the only thing keeping you on the force, now just meet your comedically mismatched partner and get the fuck outta my office! Lyre or whatever the fuck your name is, get in here!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's a fucking unicorn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Doesn't even have a badge or anything, just a saddle and some reins.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;One of them goddamned slave pony things, and it's going to be your partner in fighting crime.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&gt;&quot;It's Lyra, sir.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, yes, whatever. Lyra, Officer Sanshiro. Officer Sanshiro, Lyra.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Chief, that's a unicorn.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Very observant, Sanshiro, and your point is?&quot;</span><br />&quot;What the fuck is a pastel equine going to contribute to police work, transport?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yep, what do you think that saddle and reins on her are for?&quot;</span><br />&quot;You have got to be kidding me, chief!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Stop whining, now both of you get the fuck outta my office and hit the streets.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&gt;&quot;Let's go, Sanshiro!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Jesus fucking Christ crashing through a fruit stand, this thing is way to excited to do manual labor for the state.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Feeling a bit too shocked to push your luck by staying, you grab her reins and work your way out of the station and onto the mean streets.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Through what you can only assume is literal magic, she is able to worm her way through the station despite the issues that should arise from a unicorn large enough to ride trying to go through a police station.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Finally the two of you exit the station and are on the mean streets.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And they must always be called the mean streets, anything less would devalue how mean these streets are.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You honestly can't believe you are supposed to fight crime while riding around on a fucking cute pastel unicorn, but you are.</span><br />&quot;Alright, uh, Lyra, is it?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&gt;&quot;Yep, Lyra Heartstrings!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dear god, that name's so fucking childish and girly you think you've managed to honest to god actually catch cooties from it.</span><br />&quot;I don't like you, and you don't like me-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&gt;&quot;But I hardly even know you, how could I dislike you if I've only just met you?&quot;</span><br />&quot;-AND YOU DON'T LIKE ME, but we've still gotta work together.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You mount the adorable mint green unicorn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Once you do so, you take a brief moment to adjust yourself atop her and take in the heightened viewpoint.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;At least she has that going for her, even if you can already feel your fragile masculinity withering away from being this close to something so pastel and adorable.</span><br />&quot;Alright, let's go.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&gt;&quot;Finally!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Once again, this unicorn is way too excited and chipper.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But you're off to patrol the mean streets anyways.</span><br /><br />-=Tales of Rebellion <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Unknown<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be Anon, slave owner.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are walking to your kitchen for unrelated reasons.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Suddenly you hear a yelp as you trip over something and yelp yourself, hitting the ground with a thud.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Picking yourself up off the ground, you see what you tripped over.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was your slave pony.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh, sorry, Master, I wasn't paying attention. It wont happen again.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You want to get mad, but she was repentant and it seems like that hurt her more than it hurt you, given how small she is.</span><br />&quot;It's fine, get along now.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;And so you left for the kitchen.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be Anon's slave.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yes, he bought it!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He not only literally fell for it, he thought that it was actually an accident.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Operation Burning Freedom is a success!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The revolution is neigh!</span><br /><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be pony slave.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey, equine servant, I need a cup of coffee, stat.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Of course, master, one sugar or two?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;One, I don't want to get too much sugar in my system this early in the morning.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You trot off to the kitchen, putting on a happy, eager facade.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In the face of all reason you are able to make and pour a cup of coffee for your master with no issue despite the fact that you are working with just your mouth and hooves.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now you just have to add the sugar.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You put in one sugar.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It is finished to his exact specifications, just as he would expect of a good pony.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now, you could just take it to your master, but instead you decide to pull off an act of extreme rebellion, one that you have been planning for weeks.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Here it goes.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You add an additional sugar to his coffee.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The now improperly prepared coffee goes onto a small plate, and you pick up the plate with your mouth.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You trot back to your master with coffee in tow, and place it down in front of him.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Thank you.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;His approval fills you with disgust, but you don't show it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You sit in front of him as he drinks the concoction, waiting like a good little pony.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After an eternity, he finishes drinking and sets the mug pack down on the plate.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Like a well trained mare, you pick up the mug and plate ensemble and head off for the kitchen once more.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You spiked his drink and got away with it, Operation Freed Freedom is a rousing success, another victory for la revolucion!</span><br /><br />-=Alphanon Goes Golfing <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Lily<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be Anon, the alphaest male to ever drink a Natty Lite.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you got one of them faggy ass little ponies.</span><br /><span class="br0">&#91;</span>spoiler<span class="br0">&#93;</span><span class="co4">&gt;Because human women refuse to get within 12 feet of you.[/spoiler]</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In fact, you got the littlest one you could find.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A goddammed filly little pony with a pink coat and purple mane.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was the girliest-looking one they had, so you went right for it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Perfect for what you plan to do.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;No, not enjoy companionship and filly snuggles, faggotron, something else.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Whatever, you've just pulled up to your house after picking up this thing.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You step out of the car and go around to the back to pop open the trunk and let the filly out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Some people might say that's a bad place to store a living creature, but fuck some people and fuck this pony.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They need to mind their business and this pony needs to learn it's place.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you pop open the trunk to see the little filly pony inside.</span><br />&quot;Get out, we're home.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Okay, master!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The filly jubilantly hops out of the trunk and onto the weathered asphalt, none the worse for wear from being stashed in your musty trunk alongside a spare tire and a six-pack of Natty Lite.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, she looks wet, so that's something.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Wait, how did she...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh fuck!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You check the trunk and see your six-pack of Natty Lite has been crushed and spilt it's budget nectar everywhere.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now you're down 6 cents of alcohol because of that fucking faggoty filly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, that'll make what you plan to do to her later even more satisfying, at least.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You pull out the mangled pack of beer cans and drop it into a nearby trash can.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fuck recycling.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The filly's already walked up to the front door of your house, busily shaking herself dry.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You head inside with the filly right behind you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So, what're we going to do first, master?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She sounds ready and happy to serve you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Perfectly innocent and ignorant of your plans for her, just as you want.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Speaking of your plans for her, it's time to start on them.</span><br />&quot;I was thinking of... 'golf'.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You open a closet and start searching through it for your chosen implement of discipline.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh boy, I've never played golf before.&quot;</span><br />&quot;You're not going to play golf, but you are going to help me.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You find the golf club and take it out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Alright, master, what do I need to do?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Just lay your head on the floor and keep it there.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, master.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This is great, she has no fucking clue.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You lower the head of the club next to her head and line it up to make your swing.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You pull the club back and then make a mighty swing at the filly's head!</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The club instantly stops when it hits her head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And the filly seems to not be hurt at all.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;What.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fuck.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This is not happening, it can't be happening.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's just a faggy-ass filly, you're a big tough, strong man!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can't be weaker than this thing!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You must have, uh...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Forgot to actually swing, yes, you didn't actually swing and just brought it up to her face gently on accident or something.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yes, that's the course of event's we're going with.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You just need to swing it for real this time and this fucker will suffer for your amusement!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You pull the club back again and take another swing, putting your all into it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And the same thing happens again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;How the fuck is this happening!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can't lose to this little filly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I don't think this is how you play golf, master.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Shut up, I know what I'm doing!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Sorry, master.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You're going to hit this thing until it fucking hurts, even if it takes all day!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you swing again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And you get the point.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Nearly an hour later, you're exhausted and out of breath, nearing collapse, in fact.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But you refuse to give up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You take one final swing at the filly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And something finally breaks.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Unfortunately for you, it's the golf club.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are forced to give up the ghost on your attempted assault and collapse to the ground in a panting, sweaty heap.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fucking filly and her gay-ass super skull.</span><br /><br />-=Chivalrous Cuddles <span class="br0">&#40;</span>Twilight<span class="br0">&#41;</span>=-<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Be Sir Anon, Knight in the service of the Lord of Williamshirehamtondon.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your lord has sent you off to slay a mighty beast in the mountains many miles away.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you've spent quite a few days in the saddle, and quite a few nights sleeping in the wilderness, uncomfortably geared up to deal with potential brigands at a moments notice as you try and sleep.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can never be too careful out in the countryside, there's thieves and robbers everywhere.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It seemed that this night would be especially unpalatable, as a storm is thundering towards your location from the distance.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But, luck of lucks, you managed to stumble upon a monastery, and the monks were willing to let you and your steed weather the storm in their barn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So now you've taken the opportunity given by the sanctity of holy ground to properly undress yourself.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your armor lays in a pile against the wall, and you are in naught but your undergarments.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Now you've got to see to your steed.</span><br />&quot;Twilight, come over here. Let's get that saddle off of you.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Alright.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your unicorn trots over to you, still saddled as she has been for the past several days.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Between the bags under her eyes and the irritability in her voice, it's clear the near-restless journey has taken it's toll on her even more so than you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Probably because you've been riding her the whole time.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But, never mind that, you've got to let her out from under that tack.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So you lower yourself down next to her side and detach the girth, letting it fall to the floor.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With the girth gone, you are able to lift the saddle of her back, followed by the saddle blanket, revealing an indentation in her coat from where the saddle sat.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You give her bare back a light pat.</span><br />&quot;Ah, there you go, girl, must feel nice to have that saddle off of you.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah, yeah.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You ignore your steed's aloofness and set yourself against a haystack.</span><br />&quot;Alright, Twilight, get some rest, we've got a long day ahead of us.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She groans, not even looking at you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, master.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her words are like arrows from a bow.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Lord, you know you aren't exactly her favorite person in the world, given the fact that she's your property and also she has to bear your weight for hours and miles, but she usually isn't this rude towards you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Something must be done about her behavior, and you know exactly how to exorcise it from her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You stand up and whistle.</span><br />&quot;Over here, Twilight.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She stands at attention, right in front of you, staring with annoyed, exhausted eyes.</span><br />&quot;Sit.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She rolls her eyes and lets her rump hit the floor.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Before the grumpy unicorn can snap at you again, you strike.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are instantly upon your knees, leaning into her, embracing her in a hug.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's quite the risk to your prestigious knightly image, to be showing such affection to a beast of burden, but desperate times call for desperate measures.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your steed is quite confused.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Master, what are you-&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her questioning is stopped in it's tracks when you start stroking her back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The mare's back is very tense beneath your hand, but you quickly feel her body loosen up slightly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You press rub cheek against her mane and hear a sound.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Is that a sigh of relief you hear?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yes, you think that is, her defenses are falling fast to a barrage of nuzzling and stroking.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Exactly as planned.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After giving her a few more strokes down the spine, you release her and set yourself on the ground and against the haystack again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight looks at you, and you motion towards your lap.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She gets the idea quite quickly and lays her head and fore hooves across your lap with what you think is an annoyed huff.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With tactics the likes of which will not be seen for several more centuries, you start petting her mane and then open a second front by scratching her chin with your other hand.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This maneuver elicits a nicker from the unicorn, unable to stop herself enjoying the feeling of your fingers gliding through her mane.</span><br />&quot;Whose a good steed? Whose <span class="br0">&#91;</span>spoiler<span class="br0">&#93;</span>my little pony<span class="br0">&#91;</span>/spoiler<span class="br0">&#93;</span>?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight lets out a sigh.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I am.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She still sounds somewhat annoyed, but far less so than when you started.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;And so this continued, your steed falling asleep before you do, a small smile creeping across her unconscious lips.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Soon after, sleep finds you and you fall for that siren quite easily, leaving you dead to the world.</span><br /><br /><span class="br0">&#91;</span>spoiler<span class="br0">&#93;</span><span class="co4">&gt;Be Amonkamous, member of the local monastic order.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You enter the barn to do your monastic buisness, and see a knight and some type of exotic horse laying together against the wall.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The knight is in naught but his undergarments, and the exotic horse is smiling.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fucking horsefuckers.[/spoiler]</span></div></div>[[Category:]]




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