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				<a id="mw-mf-last-modified" data-timestamp="1494276530" href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php/Special:History/Abused_Anon" data-user-name="HotRobotSlave" data-user-gender="unknown" class="top-bar truncated-text">Last modified on 8 May 2017, at 20:48</a>		<script>
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			<h1 id="section_0">Abused Anon</h1><ul id="page-actions" class="hlist"><li id="ca-edit" class="icon icon-32px icon-edit" title="Edit the lead section of this page."></li><li id="ca-talk" class="hidden icon icon-32px icon-talk"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Talk:Abused_Anon&amp;action=edit&amp;redlink=1" title="Discussion about the content page [t]" accesskey="t">Discussion</a></li><li id="ca-watch" class="watch-this-article icon icon-32px"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Special:UserLogin&amp;returnto=Abused+Anon" title="Add this page to your watchlist [w]" accesskey="w"></a></li></ul>		</div>
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<td><b>Writefag</b>
</td>
<td> TheNamelessAnons
</td></tr>
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<td><b>Pastebin link</b>:
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<td><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="http://pastebin.com/eahPKY2Y">http://pastebin.com/eahPKY2Y</a>
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<td><b>Pastebin creation</b>
</td>
<td>Sunday 19th of February 2017 09:16:55 PM CDT
</td></tr>
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<td><b>Last Pastebin update</b>
</td>
<td>Sunday 19th of February 2017 09:16:55 PM CDT
</td></tr></table>

</div><h3><span class="mw-headline" id="Abused_Anon">Abused Anon</span><a href="Abused_Anon#/editor/1" title="Edit section: Abused Anon" data-section="1" class="edit-page icon icon-32px icon-edit enabled">Edit</a></h3><div>
<div dir="ltr" class="mw-geshi mw-code mw-content-ltr"><div class="gettext source-gettext">&#160;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You whip your head back, getting your perfectly-coiffed mane out of the way for a little bit.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Sugarcube corner is almost empty, save for your friends and a few stragglers from the breakfast rush.</span><br />&quot;Girls, I need to talk to you all.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Is that why you're thowing a flash-mob party at sugarcube corner Rarity?&quot; Pinkie asks from the side of the table, holding a tray of drinks</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You huff.</span><br />&quot;No, Pinkie, this isn't a party. This is serious. It's about Anonymous.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Applejack takes out a flask from under her hat and adds something to her tea</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;From the smell, it's applejuice. What else?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, what's the matter, sugarcube?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You should ask Rarity what's wrong, AJ, not the building!&quot; Pinkie says, hoofing a cup of strong coffee over to Twilight</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;AJ gives her a deadpan look</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yah know what Ah meant, Pinkie.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Girls, please let her speak,&quot; Twiligh says after sipping her cup of tar. She really should consider breathmints. &quot;I think with that all we've been through, our lessons in friendship should be able to help Anonymous and Rarity, whatever their problem is.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Oh dear, I think you've got the wrong idea, Twilight. We're not exactly having relationship problems. I...I think Anonymous, wherever he came from, was...mistreated by the mares back home.<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You shrink a little in your seat, afraid to even bring up something so dark.</span><br />&quot;Abused, even.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow jerks her head up to look at you, even as she stirs her chocolate protein shake with her straw</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What? How could someone so big get abused by mares? The big guy is, well, a big guy!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;For you, Rainbow,&quot; Twilight begins in lecture mode, &quot;but I've talked with Anonymous before about sexual dysmorphia of his species, and the mares are actually smaller than him in most cases, in both height and total body mass, discounting, of course, the obesity epidemic he said was ravaging his country like a plague.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Indeed, Twilight, and I'm glad he didn't bring it with him, but I believe the injuries they've inflicted upon Anonymous were not physical in nature.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I was wondering why you were checking out all those books and asking questions about that, Rarity. Gosh, I never thought I'd actually meet somepony who was actually a victim of something like that! I mean, it's [CURRENT YEAR]!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Yes, all the signs are there. He's very sweet, but I can't help but feel that there is some kind of underlying fear behind his actions. It's almost as if he's afraid to do anything at all that might offend or anger me!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;That's a tall claim there, Rares,&quot; Applejack says before taking a drink. &quot;You sure it ain't just nerves? I know stallions can be a mite skittish.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You stir some honey into your own tea, only the sounds of your spoon and the wriggling of Pinkie's plot on the cushioned bench to compete with them.</span><br />&quot;Well, one time he was helping Sweetiebell's friends with some new adventure and he tore his shirt. Instead of telling me and letting me repair it--which I would have been happy to do--he instead buried it somewhere, snuck inside, put on another, and then acted as if he didn't remember the shirt at all!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Heh, I can't fault 'im fer tryin' to avoid yer wrath when it comes to clothin.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I wouldn't have been angry, he tore it while spending time with Sweetiebell and her friends! I was angrier at him for burying the evidence!<br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You huff.</span><br />&quot;I had to pry the story from my little sister, but I haven't confronted him about it yet.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Still, one data point doesn't make it a pattern. We'd need a few more examples in different situations to draw any kind of conclusion.&quot; Twilight's coffee-breath wafts over to your side of the table, and you use the excuse of waving off her objection to fan your own face.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You were a polite mare.</span><br />&quot;He bends over backwards to make sure that I'm always in a good mood, and he's been asking around for ideas for dates to take us on. That's my job as the mare in the relationship! Not that I don't mind a stallion that takes care of his mares, mind you.<br />&quot;Anytime the two of us share a quiet moment in the house, he'll suddenly ask me what's wrong. He's totally convinced that if I'm quiet around him, I'm giving him the silent treatment!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The mares around the table gasp.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You might have spoken a little too loud. One old mare from the table on the far wall flinches and looks over to you with sympathy.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fluttershy leans her head down even closer to the table, her pink hair curling around her cup of hot chocolate.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;The silent treatment? Oh, my, that's very serious. I, um, heard that somepony only does that when they think the other has cheated on them.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Exactly, darling, and he's been nothing but faithful. He even gets uncomfortable when I brought up the idea of bringing in another mare into our little herd.&quot;<br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Honestly Rarity,&quot; Rainbow says around her straw, leaning her face onto her propped-up hoof, &quot;I'm surprised that your herd hasn't grown to three or more, if what you say about his 'stamina' is true.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I shudder to think of what the mares from his home have done to him to make him so frightened about cheating.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight tapped her hooves on either side of her coffee cup and started to speculate.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, we should consider the logical possibility that he's been cheated on before, probably multiple times, and now he's developed some kind of complex around being absolutely faithful, and showing his special somepony that.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You push up a small blue diamond necklace hanging against your chest, twisting your neck up to get a good look at it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The jewel itself wasn't that rare or expensive, but the exquisite metalwork wreathing the stone in silver must have cost a good bag of bits</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You couldn't even find out how much it cost, since it was a commission from outside Ponyville.</span><br />&quot;He also spends a lot of his money buying gifts for me. Now, don't get me wrong, I love gifts from my stallion, but he buys such outlandish things I can hardly bring myself to accept them, especially when it's not even a special occasion. But it gets worse.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You look around the room for any foals running about. Finding none, you take a deep breath.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The rest of the girls all lean in</span><br />&quot;I don't think that's just quite the extent of it, either, Twilight. Now, none of this leaves this circle, understand? I only kiss and tell the lot of you because you're my friends, but it won't do to have this kind of information spreading out to the rumor mill in town...<br />&quot;He...none of our, ahem, 'encounters' concludes without him 'giving me face,' as it were.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You serious, Rares? Most stallions wouldn't even think of doin' that, 'cept on a special occasion!&quot; Applejack said, furrowing her brow.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ha-ha, it's not that difficult!&quot; Rainbow slapped a hoof on the table, &quot;You just have to get them drunk enough!&quot;</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Really, Rainbow?&quot;</span><br />&quot;ANYway, he goes far beyond what any stallion would be expected to do. He won't stop until I've 'arrived' at least once, even though I beg him to move on!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Every set of wings at the table start to rise a little, but none of them notice because they're leaned in so far to listen</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You...you ask him to stop...THAT?&quot; Twilight was rubbing her hooves together just above the table, blushing up a storm.</span><br />&quot;Of course Twilight, sometimes a mare just wants to skip to the best part, especially when, as he calls it, 'fourplay' takes more than five minutes!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight leans back and squashes her wings against the bench</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She pulls out a parchment and quill from...somewhere and starts writing notes on it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You notice it's in her own &quot;cypher&quot; that she made when she was a filly, with long, curving lines and interconnected words.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You appreciate the secrecy, but by Celestia, Twilight needs a good rutting.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;We can consider researching this 'fourplay,' later. Thus far, we can conclude he was probably cheated on by multiple mares before he arrived here, with at least one of them shaming him for lack of satisfaction in the bedroom, and another making their own commitment completely contingent on material gain or sexual satisfaction, instead of emotional reciprocity. If such actions occur with the frequency you report, Rarity, then more than one of them also did this to him, almost as if they were shaping his behavior...&quot;</span><br />&quot;That's still not the worst part, darling. One night, after quite the 'session,' he...I can hardly bring myself to say it.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Somehow, the dining area becomes even quieter.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You feel Fluttershy put a hoof on your withers.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It's ok, Rarity, you can tell us. We won't think any less of you or Anonymous.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You reach up and pat her hoof with your own.</span><br />&quot;Thank you, dearest. After the, ah, regular portion of our lovemaking was concluded, he asked me while we were snuggling if we could do something 'more.'&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You see Applejack's eyebrows raise.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight draws another column next to her notes and writes something down</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;That's not abberant behavior. Common courtesy requires asking to do something other than what we would consider vanilla.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Yes, Twilight, but he was asking at every single step! At first I was so shocked that he would be willing to do such a thing, and he took it as if I was offended, and thought I would want him to sleep on the couch for the night!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;That set Twilight off on another furious scribbling session.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;And what was it he was asking to do that he thought might have offended you so seriously?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I had to beg him to spill, and ten minutes later he finally admitted that he wanted to know if I would even consider anal.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;That got a few more gasps from the crowd of mares.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The old mare at the far table spit her coffee out onto her newspaper.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Mrs. Cake dropped a muffin tin on the floor in the back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Upstairs, one of the twins woke up and cried.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Far up in the clouds a pegasus felt a shiver down her spine, and both of her eyes aligned just long enough to look in the direction of Sugarcube Corner.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Anonymous sneezed on his client inside the spa.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;He thought you'd kick 'im to the couch just fer HIM askin YOU fer that?&quot; Applejack said, &quot;I sometimes ferget he's not from around here.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It takes a mare with real teats to ask their stallion for that!&quot; Rainbow laughed, &quot;You're one lucky mare, Rarity!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh Dash, I wish I was brave enough to ask a stallion for, um, for that,&quot; Fluttershy whimpered, &quot;or a-anypony, really...&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Rarity, the list was already long enough, but to add that to the list...It's unheard of!&quot; Twilight shouted and turned her notes around to show you, but to you it just looked like a bunch of squiggles in boxes. &quot;It's common knowledge asking a mare if she wants anal is like asking Princess Celestia if she wants cake!&quot; She then turned it back to herself and scribbled furiously again.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You let her little slip-up slide. Celestia wouldn't be pleased to have her own student calling her out on her own cake problem.</span><br />&quot;I know dear, it took everything I had as a mare to keep my composure after that. I just *sniff* I tear up just thinking about what Anonymous has been through back home. Those mares must have been just downright dreadful to him!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Applejack pushed her hat forward, down over her face, and slammed a hoof on the table.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It's too bad they ain't here raht now, else I'd be headin' down to their place to give'em a piece of mah mind, and mah hooves!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah!&quot; Rainbow agreed, &quot;We could give them a lesson Cloudsdale-style!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight stopped writing for a moment and just stared at the paper.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;We have to do something about this, girls. I've read every psychology paper and textbook published in the last twenty years. Rarity, I think at some point you're going to have to ask him about it.&quot;</span><br />&quot;B-but I couldn't bring myself to ask him who did this to him! I don't want to bring up so many traumatic experiences, we've only been a herd for a couple months now!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, but I think this is something that should be worked out now, instead of later, when it might escalate into resentment or paranoia. First on the list: sexual satisfaction. On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your own during coitus?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The rest of the mares at the table all jerked their heads toward the alicorn to stare.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Determined, she just pressed on without a flinch.</span><br />&quot;Ten, most certainly.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;And how long would you say these sessions last? Six, seven minutes, including what he calls 'fourplay' to pad the numbers?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Pinkie wriggles and twitches in her seat.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ooh, twitcha-twitch! Here comes a doozy!&quot;</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You ignored her and answered the question</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your stallion was a higher priority than falling objects somewhere in town.</span><br />&quot;By Celestia, no! He becomes depressed if it's any less than fifteen and apologizes profusely! Most times it's in the range of half an hour to an hour, even...even two hours sometimes.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight gave you a deadpan look.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Rarity, I'm trying to help you. Exaggerating your experience will only muddy the data.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Applejack lets out whistle.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hoo-wee. She ain't lyin, far as I can tell. I hardly believe myself.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;There it is!&quot; Pinkie shouts, &quot;How do you not explode?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight scratched out something on her parchment and shook her head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Whew, ok then: fifteen minutes to two hours...I think a brief summary on the average sexual performance of an equine male would definitely help Anonymous with his concerns about satisfying you sexually. You should also seriously consider a hydration schedule from now on.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I, I suppose I could tell him.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It doesn't have to be you, I already wrote a paper and have a presentation prepared on the subject, for when--&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight looks up from her notes and covers her own mouth with a hoof.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I-I mean, it was for a b-biology class back in Canterlot.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash and Pinkie both laugh, Applejack blushes, and Fluttershy blushes up a storm.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Sure it was, Sugarcube, sure it was.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Um,&quot; Fluttershy whimpers, &quot;c-could I see it, too?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Both of these mares REALLY needed a good rutting.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;ANYWAY, Rarity, you should also let him know that no matter how much he buys you, you could not love him any more or any less. I'm sure a letter or two to my sister-in-law could help you with that. I would also suggest getting one gallop ahead of him and initiating more experimentation in the bedroom, or being the first to ask. He's clearly eager to please you, so be honest with what you want, and be sure he's honest about what he does and does not like.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;As for the rest of us, we can take steps, too. Having conversations about our love-lives around him, or our sexual experiences, within earshot of him can help cement the validity of the information he receive in the presentation. Comments about the duration, satisfaction, and what we like done to us and do to stallions would go a long way in creating context for his own performance.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You and your friends are silent for a moment, processing what she just suggested.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Twi', am I hearin what I think I'm hearin?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh...my...I don't know.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Girls, Anonymous is our friend, and we have to do what we can to help him. It's time to Mare Up and do whatever we can to at least TRY and heal the wounds he's received in the Tartarus he came from. I'd also suggest comments about how a mare cheating on her stallion is very uncommon, or how gifts won't buy love, and how important commitment is here.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Murmurs of agreement, and a small 'eep' can be heard around the table.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can feel tears welling up in your eyes at the efforts your friends are willing to go through to help your poor, abused stallion.</span><br />&quot;Th-thank you girls, from the bottom of my heart. It means so much to me!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight reaches over and puts her hoof on your own.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Don't worry, Rarity. Together, we can save this stallion.&quot;</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are Anonymous.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You are walking away from Applejack's stand when Dash comes up and talks to her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey AJ, guess what!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So I just had amazing sex with my TOTALLY AWESOME coltfriend, and I came four times!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;That IS amazin, surgarcube! I'm really happy for ya.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah, only the best for The Dash. Most colts don't even past the first one!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You didn't know Dash had a coltfriend</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But that sex bit was TMI.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Soon you are out of earshot.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The next day you're walking to the gym wearing something &quot;more modest&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;i.e.: gym shorts and a tank top instead of your regular clothes</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;These ponies are kinda weird when it comes to clothes</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But you're definitely not /fit/ enough to walk around nude</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Pinkie pokes her head out from under a rock near the road</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hiya, Anon! Wanna play a game?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Not now, Plenka, I gotta get to the gym.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ooh, this will only take a few seconds. Look!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She picks up the rock and shakes it, several small trinkets falling out from somewhere underneath it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her hoof quickly arranges them into a row</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her hoof wraps around your neck and she nuzzles her face against you</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Now, which one of these gifts will buy you the most love?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;What?</span><br />&quot;What?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Which one of these will make a mare fall in love with you?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Depends on her taste, really.&quot; You shrug her off of you.<br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Wrong! Wrong-wrong-wrong! The answer is none of them! Gosh Nonny, I thought you'd be smarter than that.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Guess not. Welp, I'm off to go pick things up and put them down.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You ignore her for the rest of the walk, since she's trying to steal your gainz.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You stop at sugarcube corner for a protein shake afterwards</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You sit down in the corner with your shake and a newspaper when a couple poines come through the door</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight and Fluttershy order and sit down at a table, stealing a couple glances your way</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They don't wave though.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Almost like they're pretending they didn't see you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight looks at Fluttershy and starts talking</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey Fluttershy, did you hear about that stallion that cheated on his mare?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh no, I didn't!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Me either. Turns out the rate of infidelity in Equestria, according to the last four studies with a sample size greater than 500 couples showed it was less than one tenth of one percent!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;G-gosh Twilight, that's very common.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilight coughs loudy into her hoof</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You swear you hear her coughing out a word</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;O-oh,&quot; Fluttershy says a little too loudly, &quot;I mean that sounds very UNcommon. Almost never.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yes, but thankfully for the both of us, stallions are still mostly willing to give us what we want the most.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;C-cuddles?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Anal, Fluttershy. Most stallions are still willing to do what their mares love the most.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;O-oh. That's good. I wish I had a stallion to do the anal with me.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twilght facehoofs.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They each finish their donut and walk out</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Still not looking at you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;That's weird, they're usually pretty clingy friends, always sitting close and talking to you whenever they see you out and about.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You spot Caramel in the gym the next day, doing some kind of weird hopping and tossing pink weights to another stallion.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Fucking crossfit, can't even escape it here.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You set your water bottle down next to the squat rack</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It's actually a squat-looking squat rack, since it's small enough for ponies. You have to use the top crossbars.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Heh, squat squat rack</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A voice next to you makes you turn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey Anon,&quot; Caramel says in a soft voice and places a hoof on your thigh.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He mirin?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He mirin.</span><br />&quot;What's up, Mel?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I just wanted to let you know that, even if I don't know what's going on with you, I DO know that everything will turn out for the best in the end, OK?&quot;</span><br />&quot;O...kay?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;He smiles up at you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Don't let it get you down. I'm here if you want to talk.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Sure.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;He turns and walks back to his yoga mat, leaving you scratching your chin.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The next day you're picking up a box of chocolates for Rarity, since she seems really stressed-out lately.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;So stressed that even sex doesn't seem to work at relieving it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;For the last couple days, it seems all of Rarity's friends have become much more concerned with relationship drama and sex.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The mare behind the counter smiles at you and rings you up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Aw, buying a buddy a pick-me-up?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You raise an eyebrow.</span><br /><br />&quot;No, I'm buying these for my marefriend.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh, I'm sorry. We get a lot of business for and by colts here. But don't worry, I'm sure a mare like Rarity would appreciate them, too.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You frown. Would she?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh, don't be scared. Mares here in Ponyville are quite kind. There's really nothing to worry about.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I'll, uh...keep that in mind. Thanks.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;As you exit the shop, you notice a few couples sitting in the outdoor dining area of the cafe across the street stop looking at you and turn back to their partners.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Everything suddenly clicks into place.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Shit.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They all know something you don't.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Something's wrong.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Judging by the common theme, there must be something wrong with your relationship with Rarity, and she just hasn't brought it up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;What did you do?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Have you been 'there for her'?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You thought you were listening to her pretty well.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Her birthday is in exactly 47 days.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You met her two months ago. You won't forget the date when you first asked her out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She's exhausted every time you're done having sex, so that can't be it.</span><br /><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You must have done something wrong, then.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Some kind of horse-faux-pas.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Oh, who are you kidding, she wouldn't tell you or even bring it up, you have to figure it out!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can't ask her either, since if you don't know, that's even worse!</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You'll have to stop by the flowershop after you pick up that super-rare fabric from the post office.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You ordered it to keep it hidden for just such an occasion when you messed up again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Like that incident with the shirt.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can't be that careless again.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You can't lose a girl--mare like this.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She's one-in-a-million.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You'll never find another one like her, not even here.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She's your waifu, and you can't lose her.</span><br />---</div></div>




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