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			<h1 id="section_0">'Twilight's Massage' and 'What is Love'</h1><ul id="page-actions" class="hlist"><li id="ca-edit" class="icon icon-32px icon-edit" title="Edit the lead section of this page."></li><li id="ca-talk" class="hidden icon icon-32px icon-talk"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Talk:%27Twilight%27s_Massage%27_and_%27What_is_Love%27&amp;action=edit&amp;redlink=1" title="Discussion about the content page [t]" accesskey="t">Discussion</a></li><li id="ca-watch" class="watch-this-article icon icon-32px"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Special:UserLogin&amp;returnto=%27Twilight%27s+Massage%27+and+%27What+is+Love%27" title="Add this page to your watchlist [w]" accesskey="w"></a></li></ul>		</div>
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</div><h3><span class="mw-headline" id=".27Twilight.27s_Massage.27_and_.27What_is_Love.27">'Twilight's Massage' and 'What is Love'</span><a href="'Twilight's_Massage'_and_'What_is_Love'#/editor/1" title="Edit section: 'Twilight's Massage' and 'What is Love'" data-section="1" class="edit-page icon icon-32px icon-edit enabled">Edit</a></h3><div>
<div dir="ltr" class="mw-geshi mw-code mw-content-ltr"><div class="gettext source-gettext">&#160;<br />&#160;TWILIGHT'S MASSAGE<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Day hetouchedmeinnappropriately in Equestria</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Today you drop by the Library to pick up the brand new Daring Do book.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Technically it has been available for weeks, but bits are short and Rainbow Dash refuses to share her copy.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You've waited patiently for the Library to have it in stock so you can read it for free. And lo and behold, here it is in your hand.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The intention was to get home and read it, but you cannot help yourself from diving in right away.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;As you comfortably settle down on the reading area sofa, purple smart makes an appearence next to you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey Anonymous, I have a question.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Can't it wait? I've been waiting for this book for so long.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Nope, this is a question just for you.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You close the book in annoyance.</span><br />&quot;Urgh, fine, spill it.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Could you give me a massage?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;An irritating heat rises in your cheeks. She may be a pony, but who isn't uncomfortable when a female blatantly asks you to put your hands on them?</span><br />&quot;Why?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, all the late night studying for the past couple of weeks has built up a lot of tension in my back. I really need a good massage to get rid of it.&quot;</span><br />&quot;The Spa is down the street on the right.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I know, but the sessions are really expensive, and besides you have those amazing hands.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The raw look in her eyes as she stares at your hands makes you feel very uncomfortable.</span><br />&quot;What if I say no?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Then I'm sorry, but I will have to take back your reserved copy of-&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You clutch the precious book to your chest.</span><br />&quot;No! Fine, you win. Stupid mare.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Smug with victory, Twilight alters her position to lay along the length of the sofa, presenting her back to you.</span><br />&quot;I hope you're not expecting a happy ending.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oooh, I've heard Rarity gets plenty of those at the Spa. What is it exactly?&quot;</span><br />&quot;...Never mind.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Tentatively you start kneading your fingers into her coat.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You really have no idea what you are doing. No past experience has taught you how to loosen muscles with your hands, let alone with a horse.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;At the minute you are merely rubbing her coat, and judging by Twilight's distracted wiggles it is not what she expected.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, logically, if you push down on the muscles, they should compress and therefore relax, right?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You give a soft push to Twilight's back. Immediately she sighs.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Confidently you push harder. A bigger sigh this time.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Time to even it out. You press hard down on either side of Twilight's shoulders. This time, she flinches and groans loudly.</span><br />&quot;Oh, was that good?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;No!&quot; She grits between her teeth. &quot;That hurt!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Oh, sorry.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What is going on here? I heard a moan and-&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rarity enters the Library. Too late, you jump off the sofa.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Anonymous, just what were you doing to Twilight?&quot; She fixes her cool eyes upon you.</span><br />&quot;I was just...giving Twilight a...massage.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Badly.&quot; Twilight adds from the sofa, causing you to flinch.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh my dear Twilight, you really should see the professionals about such things.&quot; The white unicorn declares, trotting over.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;To your and Twilight's surprise, she gets onto the sofa and begins running her hoofs along the purple unicorn's back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Now it just so happens that I have extensive knowledge on a mare's tension points. You don't have weekly spa appointments without picking up a few techniques here and there.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Really-ooooh, dear Celestia that's goooood...&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You watch Twilight practically start panting as Rarity works her hoof magic. It is very strange.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Say Twilight,&quot; Rarity murmers as she moves her hooves in small circles &quot;what would you say to a...happy ending?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You grab your Daring Do book and leave to the sound of them giggling together.</span><br />&#160;<br />&#160;<br />&#160;<br />WHAT IS LOVE<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Day teaching degree in Equestra</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You have a teaching degree, or the equivalent of.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Today marks your first job as a teacher; Cheerliee came down with a cold and you have been asked to cover her classes.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Nothing feels better than strolling into a noisy schoolhouse, head held high, ready to teach young minds.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The feeling is cut short by the paper aeroplane that lodges itself in your tear duct.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After you finish screaming and clutching your watering eye, you glare at the class.</span><br />&quot;Which one of you little...foals threw that? If nobody owns up then you all stay behind for detention, and I will call your parents, AND I will construct homework the likes of which you have only seen in your nightmares.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;A tentative pink hoof appears over the sea of heads. You recognise its owner and point to the corner.</span><br />&quot;To the corner, Silver Spoon.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;As she slowly makes her way, you sit behind the desk and consult the lesson plan.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;'Explain the feeling of love'. This should be interesting.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Uh, Mr. Anon?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Yes, Diamond Tiara?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Are you sure Silver Spoon is responsible? Because I saw Applebloom throw that paper aeroplane!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Looking up, you catch sight of the tattletail exchanging a smug glance with the indignant Apple.</span><br />&quot;To the corner too, Diamond Tiara.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;W-what? But-&quot;</span><br />&quot;I know perfectly well Applebloom did not throw the plane, I saw Silver Spoon do it myself. However, since she was honest and you lied, she can go home with the rest of the class at the end of the day, whereas you will stay behind to help clean the erasers. Now, to the corner!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;She skulks past you, muttering about how her father will hear of this. You could not care less.</span><br />&quot;Now, today's lesson is about love.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You write this in big letters on the chalkboard.</span><br />&quot;Who can tell me what love is?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;There is a definite absence of volunteers. Time to pick on somep0ny.</span><br />&quot;Twist? What do you think?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Um, well, love is a feeling that, um, ponies feel for each other, right?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Correct, sort of. Love is a feeling, yes, but it is a very important feeling that can bind ponies together through the toughest of times-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Like bubble gum?&quot; Snips, one of the obvious stupid ponies, pips up.</span><br />&quot;What.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Bubble gum! That stuff binds ponies together if you get it all over you! Is that like love?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Uh, well love is more of an invisible thing-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Like magic?&quot; A fat colt speaks up.</span><br />&quot;It has been compared to magic, and some spells do enhance it-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;How many ponies does it bind together?&quot; Another filly asks.</span><br />&quot;Uh, well normally it's two ponies-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Really? Because Mrs. Around lives on the edge of Ponyville and many ponies go to stay with her. Are they all in love?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You feel the topic is screeching out of control. There are no brakes on the curiosity train.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What do ponies in love do?&quot; &quot;Does anyone love you Anon?&quot; &quot;Whenever my Dad says that he loves my Mom they both go to their room and then I hear-&quot;</span><br />&quot;OKAY who wants to sing a song about love?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;This raises excitable chatter and you smirk to yourself. Suckers, younguns always fall for a good song.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Only after the clamour dies down do you realise you do not know any educational children songs about love. Fuck.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So what's the song, Anon?&quot; Applebloom asks impatiently.</span><br />&quot;Uh, well...&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rummage rummage goes your memory. Finally you hit something. It's a stretch, but it should work.</span><br />&quot;What is love?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Strike a pose.</span><br />&quot;Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more...&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Confused looks all around.</span><br />&quot;Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You imitate the tune as you begin bopping your head and clapping your hands. Soon a couple of fillies join in.</span><br />&quot;What is love?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You bop harder and soon the entire class is joining in.</span><br />&quot;Yeah-heah!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Another attempt at the little tune before you launch into the main song.</span><br />&quot;I don't know why you're not there. I give you my love, but you don't care. So what is right, and what is wrong. Gimme a sign...&quot;<br />&quot;Now everybody join in! What is love? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The entire class, even the troublesome twosome in the corner, are nodding their heads and singing along to the chorus.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;This continues for a few minutes, your amazing instrument-imitating punctuating the voices of the class. You guide them through the normal verses of the song, yet let them sing the chorus themselves.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Eventually the song comes to a stop. The class is on their hooves, stamping and hollering.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You raise a single fist in salute, adrenaline spiking through your system, victory shining down upon you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ahem.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Cheerilee is standing in the doorway of the schoolhouse, giving you a bemused expression.</span><br />&quot;Uh, Miss Cheerliee! I thought you were down with the cold.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I got better. Can I speak to you outside, Anonymous?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Both of you exit into the open air and you immediately launch into an apology.</span><br />&quot;Look, I'm sorry about the whole-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;A hoof to your chest silences your voice, and a peck on the cheek raises your blood pressure.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Nobody has ever managed to control those kids on their first day. You're a natural Anonymous, thank you so much for taking over.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Um, n-no problem.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Today was an amazing day.</span></div></div>




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