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				<a id="mw-mf-last-modified" data-timestamp="1435594961" href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php/Special:History/%27Tucky_Bred_in_Equestria" data-user-name="HotRobotSlave" data-user-gender="unknown" class="top-bar truncated-text">Last modified on 29 June 2015, at 16:22</a>		<script>
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			<h1 id="section_0">'Tucky Bred in Equestria</h1><ul id="page-actions" class="hlist"><li id="ca-edit" class="icon icon-32px icon-edit" title="Edit the lead section of this page."></li><li id="ca-talk" class="hidden icon icon-32px icon-talk"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Talk:%27Tucky_Bred_in_Equestria&amp;action=edit&amp;redlink=1" title="Discussion about the content page [t]" accesskey="t">Discussion</a></li><li id="ca-watch" class="watch-this-article icon icon-32px"><a href="http://mulpwiki.org/index.php?title=Special:UserLogin&amp;returnto=%27Tucky+Bred+in+Equestria" title="Add this page to your watchlist [w]" accesskey="w"></a></li></ul>		</div>
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<td><b>Writefag</b>
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<td>RT_pony
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<td><b>Pastebin link</b>:
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<td><a rel="nofollow" class="external free" href="http://pastebin.com/E5XXFYT0">http://pastebin.com/E5XXFYT0</a>
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<td><b>Pastebin creation</b>
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<td>Tuesday 12th of June 2012 07:27:32 PM CDT
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<td><b>Last Pastebin update</b>
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<td>Tuesday 12th of June 2012 07:27:32 PM CDT
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</div><h3><span class="mw-headline" id=".27Tucky_Bred_in_Equestria">'Tucky Bred in Equestria</span><a href="'Tucky_Bred_in_Equestria#/editor/1" title="Edit section: 'Tucky Bred in Equestria" data-section="1" class="edit-page icon icon-32px icon-edit enabled">Edit</a></h3><div>
<div dir="ltr" class="mw-geshi mw-code mw-content-ltr"><div class="gettext source-gettext">&#160;<br />&#160;<span class="co4">&gt;Jesus your neck was cramped up, this was the last time you fell asleep in your old truck.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You slowly looked over to the passenger seat, finding only a bottle of whisky.</span><br />&quot;Now where in tarnation did Mary Lou get off to?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;In the distant horizon, the sun slowly began to rise over the mountains.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Aw hell, Pa's goin be pissed when he finds out I didn't come home in time ta help with chores. Best get a movin.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You started up the truck and let the clutch out, shooting off down the dirt trail ahead of you, rooster tails of dirt kicked up from the rear tires.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The engine roared as you raced along in search of the main road.</span><br />&quot;Dear lord how drunk was I last night? I don't recognize none of these here roads.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The tiny town in the distance grew closer and closer until you were right outside it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Several colorful looking mini-horses looking over in shock at the strange machine barreling towards them.</span><br />&quot;Holy dog shit what was in that damn whiskey? I gotta get outta here!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You raced through the town, nearly running over several of the critters and smashing into an old hay cart.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The old steel truck destroyed it as if it were held together by straw, powering through.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Suddenly, the entire truck jerked to a halt, suspended in the air.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The engine redlined, complaining about the lack of a ground beneath you and you let off the gas, opening the door and jumping for it.</span><br />&quot;Sweet baby Jesus I'm trippin balls!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;There was a blue blur that slammed into your chest, knocking you on your back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;An orange p0ny wrapped a rope around your wrists and ankles, hog tying you up good.</span><br />&quot;Aw now this is just plain shameful.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;A purple Unicorn curiously set the truck down on its wheels, watching as it jerked and sputtered to a stop, then turned her attention to you, along with the other little p0nies.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The blue one with a rainbow mane spoke first, her face only inches from yours.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What's the big idea creep!? Riding into P0nyville in your weird looking, noisy carriage, nearly running a bunch of p0nies down! Somep0ny could have gotten hurt!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Alright, you got this Anon, just think up a good response.</span><br />&quot;Are you one of them... homosexuals?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The blue p0nies eyes narrowed, and the last thing you saw was a blue hoof shooting towards you, hitting you square between the eyes, knocking you out cold.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your head was throbbing when you woke up, your vision blurred.</span><br />&quot;Ugh, dear lord, I promise not to drink, ever again. At least until next weekend.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, it's up. What do you suppose it is Twi?&quot; a thick country</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I don't know. Some kind of ape?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I ain't no galdern ape. I'm a human bein. Now let me go I has rights!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The four p0nies around you exchanged looks.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The purple one, Twi, spoke up, examining you carefully.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Why did you try and destroy P0nyville?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I wasn't trying to destroy it none, I was tryin ta get the heck outta here! How the heck are you horses even talkin?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;We're not horses! We're P0NIES! And you mister need ta show some respect!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Alright well, how are you colorful little p0nies even talking? P0nies don't talk, and they definitely aren't colorful.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;There was silence all around as the four p0nies stared at you as if you were crazy.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Apple Jack, can you keep this thing in the barn until Celestia arrives?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah&#160;?spose, tell her ta hurry though, something about this critter scares me.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Twi and a yellow p0ny left the barn in a rush, leaving Apple Jack and the blue one alone with you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, ya got a name? I&#160;?spose we can't just call ya critter.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Anonymous. I'd shake yer hand, but I'm a little tied up at the moment. And you aint really got hands now do ya?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, this here's Rainbow Dash, and my name's Apple Jack. I'll introduce you to the others another time.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Jack trotted out, leaving Rainbow Dash, who floated in the air, looking down at you.</span><br />&quot;What in tarnation are you? P0nies aint sposed ta have wings.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I'm a Pegasus you moron. And I'm NOT a homo!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She jabbed a hoof into your chest, putting emphasis on her words.</span><br />&quot;I spose I owe you an apology fer that. I wasn't really thinking. I mean, talkin p0nies, colorful p0nies, flying p0nies, unicorns, all of that is pretty weird to me.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah, whatever. Don't think I'm letting you go.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well can ya at least give me some breakfast? I'm hungrier than a hobo here.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;How do you aren't trying to trick me?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I'm only as good as my word now Rainbow Dash. I promise I won't try escape if you feed me.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow Dash looked you over for a minute, then mumbled, &quot;Wait here.&quot; and flew out of the barn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After a few minutes, she came back with an enormous red apple in her mouth, tossing it over to you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It landed on the ground in front of you, but your hogtied limbs prevented you from actually grabbing it.</span><br />&quot;Alright two things. One, I aint eating that since it's been in your mouth, two, I can't eat it cause I can't move my hands none.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ok now I know you're trying to trying to trick me. There's no way I'm untying you so you can attack me and get away.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I aint gonna attack ya, I haven't eaten all day and I'm hungry. Just untie one hand so I can eat me something.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash sat quietly, debating the decision in her head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;On one hand, she didn't want to be the one responsible if you escaped.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;On the other, she wasn't heartless.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She reached and gave a yank on the rope, loosening it just enough for you to pull a hand out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Don't even think about running, I'm the fastest flyer in Equestria.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You grabbed the apple off the ground, looking it over and wiping it on your shirt before biting into it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;As far as you could tell, Dash hadn't left any teeth marks in it, though you did have to wipe off some p0ny spit.</span><br />&quot;Well butter my biscuit this here's the most juicy apple I ever did taste!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Heh, yeah the Apple family takes there apples seriously.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You were beginning to realize the silliness of the names around here.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Jack grew apples, Rainbow Dash had a rainbow mane and flew fast.</span><br />&quot;So who's this Celestia?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;PRINCESS Celestia. Ruler of Equestria.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I reckon Equestria is a country?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Yeah, and we'll leave it at that. I'm not giving you a geography lesson.&quot;</span><br />&quot;So why is a Princess coming to see me?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, nop0nies ever seen something like you, so Celestia will probably be interested in you.&quot;</span><br />&quot;And if she aint?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash shrugged.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Then we may have to decide what to do with you ourselves.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well that makes me feel comfortable.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah yeah, less talking more eating. I have to stay here and watch you, so keep quiet and don't annoy me.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You set your hands back in the bindings and watched as Rainbow Dash retied them.</span><br />&quot;Is all this really necessary? I mean, you said you were the fastest in Equestria.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I don't feel like chasing you down, I'm just letting you know I can.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;About an hour later, you came to a realization, one Dash really wasn't going to like.</span><br />&quot;Hey Dash.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;No response, she just stuck her nose in a book, Daring Doo or something.</span><br />&quot;Rainbow!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Nothing.</span><br />&quot;Dashie!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;For the love of Equestria, what?!&quot;</span><br />&quot;I have to use the bathroom.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hold it.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I have to piss, right now. And if you don't let me go I will piss on everything you love.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash glared at you, and finally stood up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Once you were untied again, she led you to the back of the barn.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Just go here; I'm not walking you all the way to Apple Jack's house.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You faced the wall and undid the front of your jeans, and Rainbow Dash propped herself against the wall you were urinating on.</span><br />&quot;Can I get some privacy?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What, you a shy one? Relax dude, I'm not even looking.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;After a few minutes, nothing came.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Like Dash implied, you were a bit of a shy one.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh come on, flick it, sing it a song, just hurry up!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You shifted your body so your back was slightly turned toward Dash, and it finally came.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With your bladder empty, you walked in front of Dash back to the front of the barn, where she retied you to a post.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Pretty cool how she could tie knots with hooves.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The two of you sat in the hot barn for a few more hours in silence.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Being tied up to a piece of wood, you couldn't do much to make yourself comfortable.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash however?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She was fighting off sleep, all curled up in a pile of hay across the barn from you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was kind of adorable, in its own... cute animal falling asleep kind of way.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The barn door swung open and Dash leapt into the air as Twilight and Apple Jack walked in.</span><br />.<span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I wasn't sleeping!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Pretty gal darn close though.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Shut up!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The purple one Twilight intervened before the argument got out of hand.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Both of you quiet. The princess said she was too busy to make a trip all the way to P0nyville to only meet a creature. So it's up to us.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I reckon we can't keep him tied up forever, jus wouldn't seem right.&quot; Apple Jack cast a thoughtful glance at you, as if she wasn't sure about what she was saying.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I don't think he's too bad. A bit annoying. I say we just let him go back home.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I'd be fine with that I reckon, provided ya'll tell me how ta get back to the main highway.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The three p0nies looked at you perplexed, their heads tilted in curiousity.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What's a highway?&quot; Twilight asked.</span><br />&quot;It's a thing cars and trucks ride on.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What's a carsntruck?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;If you weren't still tied up, you might have given yourself a concussion from the impending face palm.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;How did you even get here?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You did your best to shrug.</span><br />&quot;I dunno. Spose I just woke up here in my truck.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So, you don't know how to get home?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Nope.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The three p0nies sort of huddled together, discussing what to do with you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;When the huddle broke, they came closer, untying you from the post.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I&#160;?spose ya can stay here in the barn for a while, provided yer willin to work. At least until we figure out how to get ya home, or if until ya get a place of your own.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well that's mighty kind of ya Apple Jack.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yeah, just don't make me regret this none. Be ready to wake up early and for a long day of hard work.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You each left the barn, and you found your truck tied to several trees with several different ropes.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Opening it, you found a set work clothes, a bottle of whiskey, a box of cigars, and a hunting knife.</span><br />&quot;Well, guess I better get all cozy, no tellin how long I'll be stuck here.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You carried everything inside, setting it all beside the haystack that was now your bed.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It wasn't the first time you slept in one.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Hell, you were actually used to it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Something soft suddenly hit you in the face, and you pulled it down to look.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;It gets cold out here at night, but that should keep ya from gettin too cold. Here's yer supper.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You set the blanket aside and took the bowl from Apple Jack's back, and looked down at the contents.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple cabbage stew.</span><br />&quot;I reckon you p0nies don't eat meat?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Is that a real question?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well, thank ya kindly ma'am. Takin me in and all. I appreciate it.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah shucks, Anon was it? Ah can't rightly turn someone away when they aint got a place to stay. Now you best get some rest, cause when Celestia raises that there son you best believe you'll be workin.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You downed the rest of your soup and lay back in the hay stack, bringing the blanket over top of you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your first day in this strange new land, complete.</span><br />&#160;<br />&#160;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You were rudely awoken the next morning by a bucket full of cold water falling on you head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The bucket landed on your head and sat there like a helmet as you bolted up right.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Wake up Anonymoose!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You looked up in the barn at the tiny yellow foal with a bowtie in her hair.</span><br />&quot;The name's Anonymous, not moose.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, whatever your name is, Apple Jack is waiting for you out in the south field.</span><br />&quot;Uh, right. Which way is the south field?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The tiny filly rubbed her head with a hoof, then pointed in the general direction of the appropriate field.</span><br />&quot;Thanks... uh.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Apple Bloom!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well pleasure ta meet ya Apple Bloom. You take care of yerself.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You walked out of the barn and headed toward the south field, finding Apple Jack and a bigger red p0ny kicking trees, causing several apples to fall neatly into the buckets.</span><br />&quot;Well if that aint the strangest thing I ever did see. How'd you do that?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Years of practice Anonymous. Start loadin these here bushels into the cart. I spect you aint no good at apple buckin.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You grabbed the first of many buckets and began loading them into the cart.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was repetitive, simple, and honest work, so you didn't mind doing it at all.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;What came next sucked.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah reckon that's full enough, go on and take that back to the barn and unload it.&quot;</span><br />&quot;...Come again?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Did I stutter? Take that back to the barn and unload it.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You looked at the cart full of apples like it was the great wall of china.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;There had to be a good 400 pounds of apples on that thing, and she was asking you to move it across rolling hills.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With a firm yank on the wagon tongue, you slowly started pulling the wagon along until it arced over the first hill.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Gravity took over and you quickly jumped up on the cart to avoid being run over, riding to the bottom of the hill.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;With no guide however, the front wheels were jerked askew and sent the cart barreling off the dirt path and into a tree.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your forward momentum shot you forward and into the tree, bouncing your head off of it and falling back onto the wrecked cart.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Next thing you knew, you were waking up on a couch, a pack of ice on you head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well Anonymous, I think you broke a record, along with a few other things.&quot;</span><br />&quot;What happened?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah don't rightly know what happened, all I can tell ya is me and Big Mac heard you crash that cart into a tree and when we came to check on ya.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Eeyup.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Dag nabit, I hope I didn't completely wreck ya'lls cart.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Don't worry bout it none, the cart can be replaced.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I reckon you're right, I'm still mighty sorry, probably cost ya a whole day's work.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah said it's no trouble, now quit worrying bout it ya hear?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Jack walked off with Big Mac, leaving you to look around at the room you were in.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It was small, but homey, pictures of the Apple family hanging everywhere.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Howdy mister Anon! Here's yer supper!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Bloom handed you a few apples, then bounced up onto the far end of the couch and watched you eat.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So, what are ya?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I'm a human.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I never seen a hoomin before.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well, I never seen a little talking p0ny.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;No way! Are you lyin ta me?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Now why would I go and lie to a cute little thing like you?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I aint that lil!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You reached over and patted Apple Bloom on the head and finished your apples, then slowly stood to leave.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Now hold it right there youngin you saint goin nowheres with that lump on yer head.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Despite being half your size, something about this old green p0ny intimidated you enough to sit back down on the couch.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Now you sit right there and get some rest, and let one of us know if you need anything.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Yes ma'am.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You laid back down on the couch and stared up at the ceiling, your mind wandering back towards home.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Need anything Anonymous?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You looked over at Apple Jack, who had her hair down and hat off, ready for bed.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Kind of cute actually.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Equestria ta Anonymous, you in there?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Huh? Oh! Yeah ah'm fine Apple Jack. Thanks. Sleep tight.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You turned over onto your side, and brought the blanket up over your shoulders, falling fast asleep once more.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;When the next day rolled around, you quickly got off the couch and went out to survey the damage, finding the wrecked cart parked out front.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;It wasn't too bad, but you had no idea where the Apple family kept their tools.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Did they even have hammers?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;They didn't have hands, so chances are they didn't have hammers.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Just then Big Mac passed by, carrying a bucket of apples on his back.</span><br />&quot;Yall still workin the south field?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Eeyup.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Need any help?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Big Mac set the bucket of apples down in a cellar, then came up, looking you in the eye.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I spose.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You were suddenly struck with the most glorious idea ever.</span><br />&quot;Come on, ah;ll give ya a ride.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Big Mac seemed to raise an eyebrow, but followed you over to your truck that hadn't moved since you got here.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You opened the door for Big Mac, seeing as he lacked hands to do it himself, and started it up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your gas gauge read a full tank, so you could get a few hundred miles before you had to fill up.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Well, you couldn't really fill up, if these p0nies hadn't discovered oil, or basic combustion engines.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;But, perhaps this would help your standing with the Apple family.</span><br />&quot;Hang on big guy.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You let out the clutch and began driving along the trail toward the south orchard, while Big Mac curiously looked at the truck, a million questions going through his head.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Not a word escaped his mouth though.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;He probably just assumed it was magic, given the fact that Twilight could do it.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;In minutes you pulled up next to Apple Jack and hopped out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Jack looked at the truck wearily, remembering all too well the last time she saw it in motion.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What in the hay are ya'll doin in that thing? That thing nearly killed half tha dern town!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Relax Apple Jack, I brought it ta help ya'll out, seeing as I broke ya'lls wagon.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You dropped the tailgate and started loading up bushel after of bushel of apples.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Once it was loaded, you jumped in the cab, and took off toward the apple cellar, careful not to go too fast, lest the apples fall out of the back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You quickly unloaded each bushel into the cellar, threw up the tail gate, and made your way back to the southern orchard.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;When you pulled up to the two p0nies only a few minutes late, you couldn't help but laugh at the look on their faces.</span><br />&quot;Yeah, this thing moves a bit faster than ya'll.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I reckon so, we could probably get the entire south orchard if that thing is as fast as ah think it is.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well you's best get buckin them apples. Or whatever it's called.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The two p0nies sprung to their hooves, dragging buckets along behind them and stated kicking trees right and left.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;As soon as one bucket was filled, you snatched it and replaced it with a new one, loading up the full ones in the truck.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;By the end of the day, you made about a dozen trips to the cellar and back.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Poor Apple Bloom was overwhelmed with the unusual amount of apples, and as the sun went down, you crawled into the cellar.</span><br />&quot;Evenin Apple Bloom. Want a hand sortin all them apples?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;No thanks mister Anon, ah think ah'm just gonna head on in for some shut eye.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well alright, you have a good evenin, ya hear?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Good night mister Anonymous!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Please Apple Bloom, mister Anonymous is my father. You can jus call me Anon.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You grabbed a few apples out of the pile and munched on them as you lay back in the hay pile.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Today was a good day.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey, wake up.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow Dash jostled your arm, stirring you from your sleep.</span><br />&quot;Mmm... Did ah over sleep?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Depends on when you wanted to get up, its past noon.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;At non you bolted up out of the haystack and looked around for your clothes.</span><br />&quot;Ah'm late for work! Why didn't ya'll wake me up?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Because it's the weekend, duh. Apple Jack wanted to know if you wanted to go to Sugar Cube Corner with us for lunch.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Ah aint got no money, so I reckon I'll pass.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;So what are you going to do?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Ah reckon ah'll get a few apples to eat and whittle some wood ta pass tha time.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow gave a crooked frown, and watched as you your belt through the knife sheath.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;She walked with you outside, and watched as you brought up a few apples from the cellar.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, have fun with that, I guess...&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow trotted over to the house, meeting Apple Jack outside the door.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The two p0nies talked a bit quietly together, occasionally looking over at you as you sat in the bed of your truck, whittling on a branch.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey Anonymous!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You looked up at the two p0nies who were approaching you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Come on, we're not letting you mope around all day.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Ah aint mopin none. What are ya'll talkin bout?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah aint got the bits to pay you fer tha work ya did so far, so yer comin with us. Lunch, dinner, and drinks are all on me.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I can't accept... did you say drinks?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash and AJ looked at each other and grinned.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;C'mon sugarcube, let's get you sumthin ta eat.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You and the two p0nies began walking to town along a dirt and stone path toward the small town you had raced through a few days ago.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Just how far was town anyway? You were getting pretty hungry.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Shall I play you the song of my people?</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;No stomach.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Your stomach growled plenty loud enough for the two mares beside you to hear, and they both erupted into laughter.</span><br />&quot;Uh, how far a walk is it to town anyway?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;We should be there in another 10 minutes. Just don't eat us.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The two mares laughed as you all continued along the path, and for some reason you couldn't help but feel your face flush.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;These seemed like nice enough people er... p0nies.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;As you began passing through town, the streets seemed to clear out fairly quickly.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Shop doors were shut and windows were closed all around you.</span><br />&quot;I reckon I'm not really welcome round these parts after my entrance.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;They're jus scared a ya Anon. Same thing happened with Zecora.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Who's Zecora?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;She's a zebra p0ny that lives in the Everfree Forest, which is where you came from in that... thing.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Ya mean my truck?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Yer WHAT?&quot;</span><br />&quot;My TRUCK!&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh, Ah thought ya said somethin else.&quot;</span><br />�<span class="co4">&gt;What's a truck anyway?&quot;</span><br />&quot;It's the big loud blue thing that we were just talking about.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Oh yeah...&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;The three of you arrived at Sugar Cube Corner, and the two mares wasted no time ordering away.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Cupcakes, muffins, waffles, this place was going to give you diabetes.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;And for your friends here?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Mrs. Cake eyed you somewhat uneasily, but at least she bothered to put on a smile.</span><br />&quot;I reckon Ah'll take some muffins ma'am. Uh, blueberry please.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;That will be 10 bits.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;We have him covered Mrs. Cake.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash threw out the extra 10 bits from her saddle bag, and the three of you sat outside in the warm sun while you ate.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Mostly because your size and stature made it kind of uncomfortable to move around in their small structures.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You were used to eating outside on days like this, and the smell in the air took you back to that picnic table your family always ate at when it was nice out.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Pa built it with his own two hands.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Uh, Anon? You alright?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A cyan hoof waved in front of your face, pulling you from your thoughts.</span><br />&quot;Sorry, guess my mind wandered off.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Missin home already sugarcube?&quot;</span><br />&quot;I aint never been more than <span class="nu0">20</span> miles from my folks, and now I don't rightly even know where I am.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah'm sure you'll find a way back some day.&quot;</span><br />&quot;Maybe this is just one big dream, and I'm still sleeping in my truck in the middle of farmer john's cornfield.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;You think we're just part of your imagination?&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You looked down at Rainbow Dash, who looked somewhat hurt by that comment.</span><br />&quot;Aw c'mon Rainbow Dash, I didn't mean it like that. Ya'll been good to me. And ya'll are kinda cute.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You reached over and rustled both their manes, and both mares cheeks flushed a little.</span><br />&quot;Ah just miss home you two. If ah could bring my folks I may be tempted ta stay here a while.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What's your place like?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Well I reckon it's a lot like this. Cept less colorful. And p0nies don't talk.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;There's p0nies there?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Not exactly. They're bigger, usually black, brown, or white. Not blue or orange like you two. And they don't talk.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Well, what other kinds a critters ya got back home?&quot;</span><br />&quot;We got some cows and pigs on the farm, and some chickens fer eggs. Some farms have horses, but mine don't.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ya live on a farm? What do ya grow?&quot;</span><br />&quot;Tobaccer.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;What in tarnation is that?&quot;</span><br />&quot;You put it in cigars, cigarettes, hell ya can just chew it.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The two mares looked confused still.</span><br />&quot;Ya'll aint got any of that do ya?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;Apple Jack shook her head.</span><br />&quot;Glad I don't smoke...&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey come on! We're gonna be late! We better get to the bar before Pinkie drinks up all the cider!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow Dash shot off down the road in a blue blur.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;She lahks ta go fast, if ya know what ah mean.&quot;</span><br />&quot;That's dirty miss Apple Jack, ah didn't need to know that.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;AH DINT MEAN IT LAHK THAT!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Ah'm a playing AJ.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;You reached down and patted her neck, knocking her hat askew.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Hey! Don't touch mah hat!&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You fixed it for her, and continued walking in the direction Dash had...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Don't do it...</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dashed off in.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You mother fucker.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;AJ trotted alongside you for a few moments in silence, a hint of blush still at her cheeks.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow Dash zipped around in the sky, landing back down beside you.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Psh... slowpokes.&quot;</span><br />&quot;You like going fast?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;I can do damn near anything in 10 seconds flat.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash held her snout high, the becoming the very definition of arrogance.</span><br />&quot;Everything, eh?&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Everything.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You and AJ exchanged looks, unable to contain your laughter very long.&quot;</span><br />&quot;PFFFFFFFFT-&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;PFFFFFFFFFT-&quot;</span><br />&quot;HAHAHAHAHAAHAH.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Rainbow's wings popped open and her face reddened.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;HEY! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!&quot;</span><br />&quot;Oh calm down Dashie. It's not like I plan on finding out anytime soon.&quot;<br /><span class="co4">&gt;The three of you stepped into a small bar, which was already beginning to fill up with mares and stallions.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You found a few barstools that were still empty, and you sat with the two mares on each side.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;Dash grabbed the bartender, ordering a first round of apple cider for you and her.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;A frothy mug was placed in front of each of you, while AJ had what appeared to be a shot of whiskey.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;You each clanged together your glasses.</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Ah think this is gonna be a great new friendship.&quot;</span><br /><span class="co4">&gt;&quot;Agreed.&quot;</span><br />&quot;I s'pose I can stay a while. Cheers.&quot;</div></div>




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