What is recorded here is every RP post and text answer (in order) made during the earlier months of my Berry Punch blog. Some of the image posts had to do with these, making it necessary for me to collect them so you could understand what was going on at the time. Enjoy! (The names of the person asking a question are between their submission and my answers). - So anyways how is your sex life? ~Tommy Wiseau Anonymous Apparently active. But I recall very little. Oh hi, Mark! You stay away from miss Punch! She is a good mare, and you will NOT speak to her that way! typeandprint-deactivated2012012 Yes. Please make him go away! Don’t take my little Pinchy… Miss Punch, I promise you... Anypony that tries to take your child away, will do so over my dead body. typeandprint-deactivated2012012 Thank you so much. ;-; Dear Berry Punch, What is your child's name? Is it a filly or a colt? Anonymous I call her Pinchy. Some ponies call her Berry Pinch. And she is a filly. Mommy loves her more than anything. <3 berry, i know everyone says youre a bad parent, but i think youre really a loving one. lemme test this theory. whats more valuable to you. your booze or your baby filly? Anonymous My filly of course! I’m not a bad parent, I never let her out of my sight. … oh no… Where did she go? ;-; Interested in another drinking buddy? typeandprint-deactivated2012012 All are welcome to join the party! ^.^ Miss Punch? Care for a little friendly competition? *Produces two shot glasses and gallons of alcohol* typeandprint-deactivated2012012 You’re on! >:) Wait, Berry Punch, shouldn't you figure out where your daughter is before entering a drinking competition? Anonymous Oh it’s okay! I saw her with the princess, Celestia! I trust her. She even reassured me that she was the real princess and that Pinchy would have such fun with her. Her eyes were a bit odd though… Miss Punch, there is only one Princess Celestia. How tall was this Princess Celestia who spoke to you? Anonymous She was very tall. Quite Intimidating. Had a big grin… Her crown was on crooked… OH GODS AFLAME THAT WASN'T CELESTIA! That was Molestia, Miss Punch, we HAVE to find your daughter, NOW! typeandprint-deactivated2012012 WHAT!? WHO!? OH NO!!! ;-; PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC!!! *faint* Please wake up... Oh, forgive me, Miss Punch.... *slap* typeandprint-deactivated2012012 OH! Oh my. What are we gonna do? ;-; We are going to find her. I give you my word, I will help you find your daughter. typeandprint-deactivated2012012 EVERYPONY! PLEASE HELP ME GET MY PINCHY BACK! Thank you. Dear Berry, I was unaware of your current crisis when I asked my last question. When my sledge hammer and I find Molestia would you prefer I break her horn, her wings, or her legs first? -Wrongness Anonymous I don’t know. What if it really is the princess and she’s having a crisis of her own? OH! I JUST WANT MY PINCHY BACK! You love her more than this ticket to an endless wine cellar? Anonymous YES! I love her more than anything! And now she’s gone… I tried asking Soarin to have the wonderbolts put out an eye in the sky, as well as Rainbow Dash (one of her anyway), but they aren't very responsive right now. Any ideas on who else we/you could ask for help? Anonymous Anypony! Save my filly! Thank you so much mister anon. What does Berry Pinch look like? Where does she like to go? Did Molestia say where she took her? askstarbuck She has an adorable little horn… *sniff* and she’s pinkish and… *sniff*… I DON’T KNOOOOOW!!! ;-; *sob* Berry Punch! What if Molestia took your daughter back to Canterlot inside the castle!? We'd never be able to go look in there if she took Berry Pinch there! askspikesomething-deactivated20 OH NO! Don’t say that. ;-; Maybe the guard ponies can help? *hugs* It's ok, Berry We'll get her. Don't worry. askstarbuck *hugs* I hope so! I really do. So Misses Punch, sit down here, have a cupcake and a glass of wine... I am from the Weekly Pony, we are very concerned. When did you give you daughter to that stranger and why? lambda-dusk I… I don’t want the wine thank you… ;-; I left her with the princess about two hours ago, because she asked and I was gonna have a drinking contest so I thought… Oh, Celestia… :( So you gave your child up to have a drink? Or rather, a lot of drink? Will this incident make you overthink that? lambda-dusk ;-; Berry, you might try contacting Twilight Sparkle. She and her friends might be able to help. Anonymous You are right. I have the guards looking for her too. I hope they find her so I can hug my little filly again. Do you know where Molestia could've went? phantasm-of-flame We think she went to the castle… I'm sorry! Wait! The Guard Ponies! They have in and out access to every part of the castle! We can ask them to look! askspikesomething-deactivated20 Yes! I already have. Oh little Spike you’re so sweet. ;-; *HUG* *over com-link* Don't worry Ms.Punch. I am en route to the castle to rescue your daughter now. Over. *static* alex-wingace-and-co Go Nyan cat! Go! *over com-link* The guards are searching the lower floors while i orbit around the castle searching upper levels with an IR scope. I can guarantee your daughters safety. Over. *static* alex-wingace-and-co Oh bless you all! Please tell me when you find her! I can only smother Spike for so long! *over com-link* We believe we have found her. Some guards are moving up to check it out. I have warned Molestia that if she does not hand over the Philly, I will use deadly force. Over *static* alex-wingace-and-co Oh! Be careful! Pinch, Colox and I are currently in the castle. We've got a plan, in case Molestia tries to fight back. phantasm-of-flame Oh my! So much help! I am so happy you all came to my aid. ;-; *over com-link* The guards and I are searching the castle grounds. It should be only a matter of time before we find Molestia. Over. *static* alex-wingace-and-co I hope she’s alright! -Pinchy was rescued from Molestia- HEY, she won't remember anything. I''m NOT there anymore, so that ship HAS sailed anyway. See you LATER, berry! askmolestia Did you… STRANGER DANGER! WAHT I AM BERRY PNUCH THERE CNA ONLY BE ON!E DRIKNIG COTNEST LETS GO COMON Anonymous NONSHENSH! I EM BURRRRY… *hic* PUNSH! YOU CATN BEET… *snore* WHAT DID YOU DO WITH THE REAL BERRY PUNCH? WHO PUT YOU UP TO THIS? Anonymous I am Berry Punch… ;-; (Below are parts of a Snails roleplay wherein Berry hits on him drunkenly, then takes obsessive care of him. Sadly half of the posts are missing due to them having been on his blog) Does Snails need some lookin' after? ask-big-mac-deactivated20111025 HEEESH! ALONE!!!! ;-; *hic* I'm fine! I swear! ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac WHY DONT SHOO *hic* LOOK ATME WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!? *hic* … *Snoooooore* *Snooooooore* Hold up, make lo-? Oh my Celestia you are seriously drunk... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *mumble* I’m not sheleshtia… *mumble* *snoooooore* *facehoof* ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *snooore* … applesh… *snooore* … oh Rainbow Dash… *snooore* *crawls out from under her* Oh my that was awkward... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *falls* *snooore* yo got all mushy about my parents being gone for the day, and i think the hug you gave me slid a spinal disk out of place. ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac … I’m sorry little Snails. ;-; Will you be alright? Yeah, I'll be fine. And I suggest you lay off the sauce for a while... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac You seem so much smarter than the ponies say… You are a good kid Snails. Thanks. And blame Snips for my acting dumb. (He has one heck of an ego to fill) ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac He always seems to be leading you around. I think you should hang around Spike more often. Hmm, that's odd...Hey, didn't you say earlier that you don't like the Filly's being alone with HER around? If you want, i could protect them! I don't have anything better to do at the moment and with them under my protection, we can be sure we don't have a repeat of last night.... alex-wingace-and-co Have at it! Can I trust you? ALEX wallace! I know him! HE is a well-known FOALFIDDLER. He's TRYING to gain your trust SO he can get closer to your foal! I wasn't ever GOING to do anything, I just wanted TO talk! But that Alex-Wallace is NO good! Even if YOU don't trust me, CAN you take that RISK!? askmolestia Wait… really? Oh… *holds Pinchy* I DON’T KNOW WHO TO TRUST! D: Yes! I might just take them down to Sugarcube Corner or a Cafe or somewhere to hang out but i would certainly never, EVER, do anything to them! I would protect them with my life. You can trust me. And just for good measure, i will even Pinky Pie swear! *ahem* Cross my heart and hope to fly. Stick a cupcake in my ey-*pokes eye by accedent*-OW! *rubs eye* Well, you get the idea... alex-wingace-and-co But I… the princess… she said… but is that really her? OH! SUGARCUBE corner? Right, so he can slip SLEEPING pills into her CUPCAKE! THE only one you can trust is YOURSELF. Well, I think you can trust yourself. Best NOT to drink around your DAUGHTER, just in case. BE a good PARENT and don't trust him! askmolestia Oh no! But what about Pinkie Pie? Can’t I trust her? Can I even trust me? PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC PANIC! Y'all can trust me when I say I'll keep Pinch safe, promise! ask-big-mac-deactivated20111025 *sniff* I really hope so. Y'all need a break! Go lay down for a bit or somethin', I'd come over and comfort ya' were I there and such.. ask-big-mac-deactivated20111025 Right… heh… I’m holding Pinchy though. In fact, I doubt you can trust Pinchy with herself! Get her a chastity belt! Anonymous O-o; PANIC!!! Ummm, yeah. That's really Molestia. We should probably go check on the Fillies now...Even if she's here, I don't want anypony to be kidnaped by her again. *to Molestia* Dammit Molestia! I told you to stay away from Ponyville!!! You are lucky i don't have any of my weapons with me or you would be swiss cheese by now!!! Get out now and don't touch ANY of the Fillies on your way out! I have made a promise i INTEND to keep!!! alex-wingace-and-co Oh! *holds Pinchy tighter* Good! Take it from me when I say that ya' can always put your love and trust in ya' family. ask-big-mac-deactivated20111025 *nods* I have to find Snails! He’s all alone! No, Celestia will be fine. She is just an evil copy of Celestia so we shouldn't have any worries. alex-wingace-and-co Okay. Be careful! She’s powerful! OF course he wants to CHECK on the fillies, that'd be JUST great for him. Look, he's EVEN all POSSESSIVE! HE is deluded into thinking the FOALS are under his protection! I'm a little creepy, but AT least I'm GENERALLY honest about it! askmolestia AHH! Snap out of it princess! We love you. ;-; You can’t get to my Pinchy again! Or little Snails! Why panic? *tries to soothe* lambda-dusk AHH! DON’T GET CLOSE! YOU’LL TOUCH PINCHY! YOU SAID SO! PANIC!!! Doesn't it NOW make sense how ALEX-WALLACE was trying to be such a CLOSE FRIEND! askmolestia AAAAAHHHH!!! YOU’RE RIGHT!!! PINCHY! SNAILS! NOWHERE IS SAFE!!! *cries* Hey you can trust me I am from the media. lambda-dusk AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!! Berry, Berry! Calm down. Don't let her get to you like that! Do I need to remind you that I helped save Pinchy from her. I know what she's capable of. pinch-harmonic *whimper* Yeah! Yeah… You did. *lands outside and walks in with Snails on my back* Hey Berry! i found Snails wandering around outsid-WHAT THE HAY IS SHE STILL DOING HERE?!?!?! *starts spining up minigun on jet wing attachments* *to Molestia* GET THE *censored* OUT OF HERE BEFORE YOU REGRET EVER COMING TO PONYVILLE!!!! alex-wingace-and-co *Grabs Snails* She plays with my mind! *still aiming minigun at Molestia* Don't listen to her! She is a lying, evil bi-*censored*!!! She has been warned! I may be new to Ponyville, but I will not tolerate this sort of thing in my new home!!! alex-wingace-and-co ;-; *over com-link to Luna* Hey Luna, could you help me? I'm trying to get Molestia out of ponyville with the Fillies INTACT. I am down with Berry Punch protecting Snails and Pinch. We could use some help! Over! *deactivates mic* Ok, she should be here if she decides to help! Lets hope she does... alex-wingace-and-co BY LUNA’S GUILDED BALLROOM DRESS! WHAT IF SHE’S MOLESTIA AND THIS HAS ALL BEEN SOME VERY CONVOLUTED PLAN!? Pinchy: “Will somepony pwease make mommy stop panicking?” It's ok Berry, As long as i'm here, i will protect you from this evil bi-...(okay, for everyponies sake)-... Witch!!! alex-wingace-and-co *sniff* How do you know she is a witch? Does she float? ;-; I will tell you a secret... 100% of all molesting is done by ponies who drink water and breathe oxygen. Coincidence? I don't think so. lambda-dusk I’d panic ~ but this spell ~ is so relaxing… *facehoof* Stop panicking, everything's fine. I just radioed to the guards. It should be any minute now. And besides, I refilled my ammo before i left and i have non-lethal rockets filled with knockout gas in case she tries to escape. alex-wingace-and-co But… can’t she just teleport? ALRIGHTY then, I can see WHEN someponies are too RUDE to speak civilly! *disappears* askmolestia … >.> She’s gone… for now… Are we all safe? I think so. Luna Alicorn, Moon princess of Equestria, Alchemist, and, owner, editor and reporter of the Canterlot Times. Tell me more about what has just occured, for our readers. :D lunaanswers Well… I got drunk this morning and smothered Snails because the poor dear was all alone. Then I was sobered by Alex. Also I misunderstood the term filly-fooler to mean pedofoalia, then Molestia showed up and I called out to your socks, abicus, and gulded ballroom dress. But now she is gone and I am no longer afraid that this has all been a bad dream. ...Why would you call out to my socks, and, things ponies assume I like...? lunaanswers I. Don’t. Know. But after you showed up she left. I assume that means she didn’t want to face you? Well, OBVIOUSLY, this BLOG is you at two drinks, and the OTHER blog is you AT five. Depending ON what you're DRINKING, I mean. askmolestia Well dat makesh shenshe… waaaaaitaminute… Don’t I know you pretty lady? *giggle* *hic* DON'T TALK TO HER BERRY!!! IT'S MOLESTIA!!! GUARDS!!! IN HERE!!!! alex-wingace-and-co She wa hoo? *pfffffffff* I’m sho drunk! XD Geez, can't a PRINCESS send questions over the Ponynet, without actually being anywhere near you IN physical PROXIMITY, without being bothered? askmolestia Ish okay prinshesh! *hic* I dunno what yoo are talking about! HAHAHA*snort* I liek yur hair! *hic* Shiiiiiiny… You're COMPLETELY tanked! Guess what?! You're also gonna be male for the next hour or two! *Casts spell* askmolestia I’mm wha~? ERK! WHOA! How did THAT get there!? What am I shupposhed to do with thish thing? HAHAHA! *snrrrrrrkt* HAW! *hic* *falls over* I'll FUMP you anytime, sister. askmolestia O//////O PRINSHESH! *hic* (And more of that Snails story arc) *starts throwing up into the toilet* Why do you *urk* think this is fun?! *vomits some more* ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *pets back* Oh Shanilsh! You ishn’t shupposhed ta find out ‘bout thish for a few yearsh… Poor shing… *hic* It will make more shenshe when you grow up. I’m gonna shtay wif ya tonight to make shure yoo don’t… well… Let it all out… wait, why *hic* cant you just bring the medicine to me? ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Becaushe if you shtay here I can alsho watch my Ruby-Cherry-Berry-Pinchy. allright *follows you* ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Take dis an get shome shleep. You’ll feel better I promish. I gotta go find shomebody to help. Shtay here, I’ll be right back. Oi, Berry, as long as I'm giving gifts to you, here's a sobering potion and a hangover cure. *passes two large bottles over to Berry* mercykilledwithkindness-deactiv I’m gonna use that now. Gotta take care of Snails and find my lady friend Colgate. (OOC: I sent that question ages ago. XD) Um... You're female again... *Blushing uncontrollably* arborverse Sorry I ran off! Had to help Snails! ohkay *takes pill* thanks... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *kisses your horn* I’ll be right outside, won’t go far. It's no trouble, really... *Is still blushing* arborverse I can’t find Colgate! Will you keep me some company? I need somebody to love tonight. Snails and Pinchy are asleep now. *passes the *neigh* out* ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac *Puts blanket over the sleeping Snails* Uh, sure, I'll keep you company, Berry... ...Wait what do you mean "I need somebody to love"? arborverse *nuzzles* You know… ...Oh. Well in that case, absolutely. *Kisses* arborverse Yay. ^.^ And the lady isn’t even drunk this time! Go me! *Laughs* Well I'm glad I didn't have to get you drunk first. arborverse I’m all about the love! <3 But be quiet as you can, Snails is sleeping a little mishap off. *wakes up, still drunk* what? why am not at home? ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Oh Snails! Go back to sleep dear. You need to sleep. You are safe here. Oh yeah, sorry about that. *Nuzzles* So, Berry, uh... you wanna... youwannagotoyourbedroom? *Turns bright red* arborverse Oh! I sure do! ;) Just let me see Snails back to sleep first. oh, um okay... *goes back to sleep* ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Poor thing… Good night little Snails. Good night everypony! Again I go to sleep. I have a guest tonight, and I have to keep her… company. *giggle* Also looking after Snails. See you all tomorrow! (This is where that long winded submission about killing Pinchy's clone happened) Morning, Berry. How's it...Why are you crying? Is Pinchy I'm trouble? askstarbuck Letter… clone… box… razor… ;-; *wakes up from being passed out* oh my, what in the name of Celestia happened last night? and who's house is this? ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac It’s my house. You feel better Snails? I just heard the news. *Hugs* arborverse *hug* I keep telling myself, just a cruel joke, just a cruel joke… *hugs* I also hope this just a really cruel joke rainbowdashes-twin-deactivated2 Thank you, Dash. It was! I’m too relieved to be upset about it. Why is everypony saying that Molestia gave something tome? ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac She left you some alcohol and you drank it. It made you very sick and I brought you home to take care of you. I... drank alcohol? And Molestia gave it to me... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Yes. She left it on your bed with a note. O-oh my... That is so embarrassing... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Don’t worry about it dear. Drink this tea, it will do for your headache. *drinks tea* Thanks. Oh crap... ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac What’s the matter? My parents, there gonna be home from the teachers conference any minute! ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac They were at a very long teacher’s conference! They had to stay an extra night, and besides, I have to get home quick! ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Alright, but be careful Snails! Remember you can always come to me if you need help. How do you avoid child services when Derpy has them breathing down her neck constantly? tieriavowelserde They don’t actually bother Derpy, that’s a rumor. She’s a good and loving mother and her friend Raindrops helps her with Dinky. They don’t bother me because I’m a good mother too! I AM! Am I a good mother? I think you're a good mother. arborverse Thank you Arbor. :3 Woooooooow. *clapping* Wooooow. That is just...wooooooow. I made out with Nightmare Moon once, but a one night stand with Celestia? Wow. I bow to you. askstarbuck Thank you! Thank you! ^.^ Teach me your ways, drunken sage. askstarbuck Drink and see what happens! Just be available. Wait Do you even know who the father is? Anonymous Yes. I do. But I don’t like to talk about him. Just wondering, who is Pinchy's father? You had to have gotten her somewhere. Anonymous I really don’t like to discuss him. v.v May I enter your drunken state? <3 arborverse Of course! <3 “Wat.” Go to your room I said! Just a question Berry, but how often do you get drunk per week? askspikesomething-deactivated20 An easier question is how often am I sober? I’m not very drunk right now. Just a little buzz. *chuckles* is Derpy a good kisser? askstarbuck Exshellent! i dare you to go on a date with derpy! Anonymous O/////O Where ish Derpy anyhow? Heh heh! What was it like? askstarbuck Derpy? Her tongue was like her eyes. EVERYWHERE. "Derpy? Her tongue was like her eyes. EVERYWHERE." UNF. Anonymous UNF indeed mishter anon! *hic* I'm naked. timothymcsweeny Fascinating! *srrrk* *laughs at your tiny human penis* berry punch I'm sorry but you are a horrible drunk it's affecting every aspect of your life Anonymous And YOU are increashingly attractive! *hic* Hmm... Meh, What the hay? I'll have a few drinks (especially since i couldn't make it to the rave earlier)! Got any vodka? alex-wingace-and-co Yush! Hmm, maybe i could learn sometime... Also, on an unrelated note, COMBUSTIBLE LEMONS!!! alex-wingace-and-co WHAT!? OH SHELESHTIA WHERE!? You are wacko. How come you talk so funny? pinkieanswers-deactivated201110 I’m not the one who shpeaksh to rocksh and a bag of flour! *hic* WAIT! WHAT!? HAW!!! *snort* Oh uhm .. hi Berry Punch, I'm Saburou n .. nice to meet you! So .. I hear you know a good liquor or two to relax with on a hot night .. what do you recommend? ask-saburoutu Wine of courshe! ^-^ Hey Berry Punch, what's your favorite type of liquor to drink? ask-saburoutu Yesh. Can I borrow a jar of your saliva? askstarcatcher-deactivated20111 o3o Wha for? *hic* Wall I wann see whut you tasst lik but I can't kes you so ya askstarcatcher-deactivated20111 Why can’t you kish me? Iz alreddy nlov with nnothr pony. askstarcatcher-deactivated20111 I am alsho in lovesh! Pfffchch hey berry, I made my special 'laughing' brownies, you want one? ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac How did you get that shtuff Shnails? So duzzat mean I git da jar? askstarcatcher-deactivated20111 Shure why not! If Molestia says ANYTHING about me licking her flank, tell her it was a dare. ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Suuuuuuure it was! ;D Berry... you're starting to worry us... just so you know... Equestria Protective Services already is starting a file on you. We're all your friends here. Please, let us help you. askshutterfly GO AWAY! >:( NOBODY TAKES MY PINCHY! Do I have to call child services? askshutterfly Why? :( (Pinchy answered some things here) Sorry that those anons got to 'ya...but I'm back home! I believe I owe some pony a date... ask-big-mac-deactivated20111025 Pinchy: “Hi big Mac. You should go upstairs and talk to mommy… She’s sad.” So you're in love with somepony who is known for being a sexual predator? Wow. You really do need your daughter taken away. Anonymous Pinchy: “Mommy thinks she is the real Princess.” *shoots the anon's and sets up an anti anon barrer around the house.. it will teleport any anons to the moon* there... now go hug your mother pinchy.. and dont worry.. all of the princess's and even daddy will protect you and your mother. besides.. she is a good drinking buddy askkryxel Thank you Luna. :) Soooooo, Pinchy, you doing alright...? lunaanswers Yes Luna. I’m okay. I’m used to Mommy being sad… Hey Pinchy You are very adoarble. I hope you mom will be okay. She really does love you and wants what's best for you. mymanesix Thank you. *blush* She will be okay. Mister Big Mac is talking to her. Pinchy... Is your mom... a good mom? Anonymous She’s a great mommy and I love her. Sometimes she won’t let me go anywhere though. I am so sorry that those mean anons insulted your mother. Here, *hands you a bottle of vodka* give this to your mother, Molestia keeps sending them, I'm sure your mom would like to have one of these right about now. ask-snails-the-swag-master-deac Uhm… I don’t think mommy should drink this stuff right now. When she gets sad she hurts herself sometimes. Pinchy, why do you always say 'Wut?' lunaanswers I say “Wat.” when mommy does something that confuses me. That happens a lot. Hi Berry, I was wondering how old Pinch is. I have a foal as well and I was wondering how far apart in ages they are. askdelilahandfinn-deactivated20 I’m 6! I’m very smart too. *proud* Pinchy... I am the last person to want to separate you and your mother... but if she is hurting herself and is always drunk... hell, she was trying to make you drink! She needs serious help, or she might do something really bad. Don't you want your mom to be happy again? Don't you want to be happy? askshutterfly Mommy needs me to help her. I won’t leave! I am happy. I’m with mommy. *blocks away anons* Leave my friends alone you stupid pests D:< *pushes away anons* Are you okay, Pinch? D: ask-caesar-thepony Yes I’m okay. Thank you miss Keyblade. SECOND QUESTION: WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF PRINCESS CELESTIA ASKED TO WATCH YOU CLOP IN THE SHOWER Clop in the shower for her of course. O///O “Wat.” PINCHY!!! FOURTH QUESTION. DESCRIBE THE MOST AWKWARD MOMENT YOU WALKED IN ON ANYPONY. Well… Pinchy is growing up real fast… I uhh… Didn’t know she could do that… We have to have “the talk”. ;-; QUESTION NUMBER FIVE. DESCRIBE YOUR FIRST KISS. I vomited… Hey, Berry, if you're on yet I have a question, when that stampede happened why did you close the windows, only to go outside? Was it just because you were drunk? twdurgan Most things happen for that reason. Hey Berry. Do you get a lot of alcohol amnesia? Was there any time you didn't have that and wished you did? I know I have. ekevoo I don’t know. I can’t remember. Pinchy’s name. I was talking to myself in a mirror, and my drunken lesbian reflection agreed. Our daughter is called Ruby Pinch from now on. But then I thought… what if I am the reflection. But what if we are both reflections of reflections! Oh shi- THAT'S IT!! I'm sending a LETTER to Foal Services RIGHT NOW!! rarityreplies Oh yeah? How you gonna write when you’re so busy panicking about dust in your hair!? Is it ever confusing to know that there is a lesbian version reflection of you in the mirror? Are you Bisexual? Anonymous Confusing when I’m sober. Comforting when I’m drunk. And yeah. Berry Punch, are you dying or something? Your responses are becoming less frequent and more drawn out. Anonymous … Aren’t we ALL dying Mr. Anon? Aren’t we all? I’ve been… avoiding the “take Pinchy away from me” drama. Berry Pinch drama? That's so last week. Now it's Soarin drama, Type drama, sexual orientation drama, and religious drama. Anonymous Of course it is! That’s because I’m avoiding it now. I’m avoiding everything else as well. I have my own drinking problems, and a daughter to look after. The drama ponies will just have to make do without me. COLGATE Ish mah woman! She’s not actually related. Pfffffffff *hic* Shilly Looky here Look, look, my family ish very shimple. Cheeeeeeeeerilee ish my shishter. Peeeenchy ish my daughter. Colgate ish my marefriend! *hic* I do have shexual relationsh wif Cheeri and Cooooolgate. At the shame time. SHEEE!? SHIMPLE! *burp* I’ll answer your questions pretty soon. *hic* My sister is fiddling wif’ my hair. So like… brb? Yah. If you are always drinking all the time, just how do you maintain that filly-ish figure of yours? iggydabrony The artist is fond of me. Wait. 4th wall. Uhm… Yoga…? What do you think of Twilight Sparkle? Anonymous Lightweight. How's your Cheerilee doing? cheerileetheteacher She’s asleep right now. Which is a problem because I can’t find the remote. *hic* If friendship is magic what is love? acehades Swamp gas. *buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurp* Hey Berry Punch.. I heard that your name was being changed by Hasbro to Berryshine.. Any comments? flutterjuice Only that I am not Berryshine and I look nothing like Rarity. that skank Congratulations, Berry! I guess this means we can't hang out anymore, even though I'm relatively sure you don't remember me anyway. er- regardless, will you be needing a florist to arrange your wedding decorations? ask-nettles-deactivated20120815 Of course I remember you! I remember all of you. Wine makes the brain smarter! err… Congrats, Berry! Thinking of having a big wedding or just a small one with booze? pegasus-cloud-kicker Big wedding! Lots of ponies invited. Congrats Berry. It's time to put all the shit behind you. Forget about the donor, pokey. Forget being alone! It's all a joy ride from here on in! We love ya Berry! Anonymous This will help me forget him. Thank you sweet anon. :3 Oh wow More than two hundred of you have wished Colgate and I the best! I’d love to thank all of you individually but, just wow! Thank you everypony! You’ve helped make this a mare’s best day ever. <3 Kisses- Berry Punch Do you need a first miister for your wedding? I can provide such services to you... after the pepper incident answer-discord Who thinks Discord should be best man? I don’t know if I fear him or Molestia more! The pepper… The pepper. onemangame asked: HOW DRUNK ARE YOU TWO GOING TO GET THE DAY BEFORE THE WEDDING? onemangame: Well, judging by the massive market run Berry’s doing. Prooobably very, very drunk. I should probably see if anyone can babysit Pinchy… Cheerilee can take her. Seemed excited about it actually… Anonymous asked: i had no idea you went plot to mouth ask-romana-menta: I-I DIDN’T…! What did Berry tell you guys!? Oh Celestia! T_T Admit you liked it! X3 I'd be lying if I said I wasn't surprised to hear about you and Colgate getting married. Or was she going by Romana...? Either way, happy trails to the both of you! Hard to imagine you settling down! asklyra Thank you Lyra! Given our love of life I doubt there will be a lot of settling down. Now I have somebody to carry me home. And that is all I could salvage. Cheers! -Skoon