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# Drury Lane: Chapter 12 -Bust'a Move-

By: PaleNarrator on May 10th, 2012 | syntax: None | size: 9.63 KB | hits: 654 | expires: Never
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1. >Day 938 in Equestria
2. >You sat at the lake just outside Ponyville, a fishing pole in your hand and a toothpick in your mouth.
3. >You've been sitting here in the shade of a nearby tree for about an two hours now, and so far you've caught absolutely nothing in the way of fishy prey.
4. >Not that you were really there to fish, of course.
5. >You cracked a grin as you happily tipped your new cowboy hat forward, casting some much needed shade into your eyes.
6. >You were sure she would have found you by now, but as always you seemed to give her a little too much credit.
7. >A light breeze passed over you and you could catch the light scent of the valley and the flowers that dotted along its hills.
8. >The soft sound of hooves reaches your ears.
9. >Sounds like it's coming from... behind you?
10. >You sniff the air once more.
11. >Grass, flowers, the dirt by the lake and... apples.
12. >Guess she found you.
13. >"Ahem."
14. >You answer her without even looking, still enjoying the shade from your new hat.
15. "What took you?"
16. >"Ah figured you'd be hidin' somewhere more... elaborate, ah suppose. Never thought to look by the lake."
17. >You feel a hoof paw the top of your head and strip the cowboy hat from you, the sun's rays making their way into your vision again.
18. >You looked up and gave a smarmy grin at the orange pony standing over you, as she puts the hat atop her blonde mane.
19. "Something you need, Applejack?"
20. >She cocks an eyebrow in exasperation and lets out a sigh.
21. >"Anon, you said you'd help me out at tha farm today."
22. "IF..."
23. >"IF ah could find ya. And ah did. Just now."
24. >You check your wrist for the time.
25. >The watch you drew in sharpie said it was half past a freckle, but you knew it was probably around three in the afternoon.
26. "It took you a bit longer than last time, didn't it? And here I thought taking your hat would give you the push to find me in record time. Looks like I was mistaken."
27. >Applejack rolls her eyes.
28. >You'd done this little game with her a couple of times before.
29. >Whenever Applejack needed some help around the farm, and needed an extra pair of hands, literally, you would always agree to help.
30. >On one condition.
31. >You would take something of hers and run off, giggling like a little girl.
32. >If she could find you, then you'd help her out.
33. >Today, you had taken her hat, which was actually pretty comfy to wear.
34. >It also smelled a bit like her hair, and that was an added bonus.
35. >After all, you liked apples. Being a baker, you made apple pies quite regularly.
36. >You hop to your feet and stretch your back.
37. "Alright Ms. Jack, you've got yourself a worker. What do you need?"
38. >"Anon."
39. >She's staring at you intensely, like she's waiting for something.
40. "What?"
41. >"Oh don't 'what' me. Hand it over."
42. "I have no idea what you're talking about."
43. >She approaches you and cranes her head towards you pants.
44. "Wait what the hell are you do-"
45. >she bites down on something sticking out of your pocket, and pulls out a big red bow.
46. >Dammit.
47. >"Anon, why'd you take Applebloom's bow?"
48. "Payback."
49. >She tilts her head.
50. "Long story, pubes are involved."
51. >"Wait, pu-"
52. "Let's just go back to the farm and get to work, shall we?"
53. >"But I-... ah whatever, fine."
55. -------
57. >"Alraght, Anon, how're ya feelin'?"
58. "Ow."
59. >"Yeah, you're gonna be fahn."
60. "Ow."
61. >You spent three hours down at Sweet Apple Acres helping Applejack with some applebucking.
62. >Now, I know what you're thinking.
63. >How can a HUMAN possibly help a pony when it comes to applebucking?
64. >Three words.
65. >Cast
66. >Iron
67. >Arm
68. >For three hours, you basically went through the orchard bitch slapping trees, the apples that hung from them falling into the baskets below.
69. >Your left arm may have been made of iron, but it still felt things like a normal hand.
70. >And right now, it felt like hell.
71. >Applejack fans herself with her hat and gives you a smile.
72. >"Thanks again Anon, ah appreciate yer help with all this. Big Mac's been laid out with a cold that's somethin' fierce. I'm surprised we were able to get all those trees bucked in time."
73. >You wipe the sweat from your forehead with your bandanna and give her a confused look.
74. "In time for what?"
75. >"Oh, Pinkie didn't tell ya? We're headin' out to Manehatten t'night for some sort of party in the city."
76. "Am I invited?"
77. >Suddenly Pinkie bursts out from one of the apple baskets.
78. >PP: "Of course you're invited, silly! Why wouldn't I invite YOU to a party?!"
79. "Because I'm a wanted man in Manehatten?"
80. >PP: "Oh. Right. Oh well, I'm sure we can figure something out on the way there!"
81. >AJ: "Wait, wanted man?"
82. "So what's the party for? And why are you throwing one in Manehatten of all places?"
83. >PP: "I'm not the host this time, actually! There's a big dance club opening up downtown, and I thought that a little vacation with the whole gang would put a great big smile on everyone's faces!"
84. "Huh, well that sounds good I suppose. How're we getting there? Train?"
85. >AJ: "What does he mean, 'wanted man'?"
86. >PP: "No, we've used trains too much in the story, so I pulled some strings with Twilight and she's agreed to TELEPORT us there!"
87. "Teleportation?"
88. >PP: "Teleportation!"
89. "With all the bipitty-bopitty-boop, the light and the POP?"
90. >PP: "Yup!"
91. >AJ: "Is nopony gonna tell me why he's a wanted ma-"
92. "OH MY GOD I PUNCHED OUT A COP, OKAY?"
93. >AJ: "You did what?!"
94. "COP. MY FIST. HIS FACE. IT HAPPENED."
95. >AJ: "Whyd'ja punch a cop in tha face?!"
96. "I DIDN'T LIKE HIS FACE, OKAY? FUCK."
97. >PP: "We should get home and get ready for the trip."
98. "Fine. Scoot over."
99. >You step into the basket with Pinkie, mime a motion of flushing a toilet, and hold your nose like you're about to jump into a pool.
100. >Pinkie and you spin and sink into the basket and disappear below the apples.
101. >Applejack's mind is too busy getting fucked to comprehend it.
103. -------
105. >You stand outside Twilight's library with Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash and the yellow one that yearned for your balls with an aching passion.
106. >Creepy.
107. >Twilight and Spike came out of the library and joined your little circle.
108. >TS: "Alright then, everyp0ny ready for the jump?"
109. >You all nod, Fluttershy not breaking her unending, unceasing stare directed at your goods.
110. >Son-of-a-bitch.
111. >Twilight's horn glows with a bright purple haze, and suddenly you're being whisked away through a dark void.
112. >And in an instant, music.
113. >SO MUCH MUSIC.
115. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfH5BnFrsmM
117. >The dance has BEGUN.
118. >All eight of you mix in with the huge crowd inside the club dancing to the beat of the music that pulsates through the building.
119. >This ain't half bad so far, actually.
120. >You're the only human in the joint, but you don't mind.
121. >There's a ton of ponies enjoying their wild night, you might as well join in.
122. >You leap over the crowd to where Pinkie's dancing and begin rocking out with her.
123. >The two of you FEEL like GODS.
124. >The two of you LOOK like you're on FIRE.
125. >Real fire.
126. >You're dancing that badly; ponies are starting to think you may be having a stroke.
128. TIME PASSES
130. >So fucking drunk oh god.
131. >You're still dancing around the room, the whole gang stumbling along with you to more music curtsey of Vinyl Scratch.
132. >Each and everyone of you is holding a mug of hard cider.
133. >You have had much, MUCH more than just one.
134. >Spike is shimmying next to Rarity who will NOT stop saying the word "DARLING." over and over again.
135. >Twilight is just... spinning around with some colt she met.
136. >He's magenta.
137. >You know that's normal for Equestria, but seriously.
138. >Dude.
139. >Magenta Colt.
140. >fuckinGAY
141. >You and Pinkie are having the time of your lives, both of you wasted out of your stupid little skulls.
142. >You swing your head around haphazardly and shout so she can hear you.
143. "DID I EVVVVER TELL YOU I LURVE YOU?!"
144. >You can make out a small gasp, and feel a passionate kiss meet your lips.
145. >Awwwwwww yyyyyeeeeeaaaaaaah.
146. >You open your eyes slightly.
147. >Awwwwwww NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
148. >Flutter-
149. >Flut-
150. >Fluttersh-
151. >Fl-
152. >FLUTTERSHY FUCK NO NO NO NO NO
153. >You grasp her face and with all your might you pry her off of you.
154. >You gasp for fucking air.
155. >FS: "Oh Anon, I LOVES YOU TOOOOOOOO!"
156. "NOT YOU."
157. >FS: "WHA?"
158. "NOT YOU."
159. >"Yes, 'LOVE YOU.'"
160. "NO."
161. >TS: "WHAT?"
162. >You breathe deep and shout, your eyes closed again in fury.
163. "I SAID I DO NOT LOVE YOU, YOU CREEPY FUCKING PONY."
164. >The music has stopped.
165. >The whole room is silent.
166. >You're seething.
167. >"You... you don't love me?..."
168. "No! Get that through your THICK fucking skull! I do NOT love you!"
169. >You open your eyes.
170. >Oh.
171. >Oh shit.
172. >You're staring back at big, blue, tear filled eyes.
173. >You glance to the right of them.
174. >Fluttershy is standing next to Pinkie, still hazy eyed and hiccupping.
175. >You meant to shout at Fluttershy.
176. >Instead, you shouted at the last thing you ever wanted to make cry.
177. >Pinkie lets out a small croak, looks down dejectedly, then runs off and out of the dance club.
178. >Nice job, you fucking nonce.
179. "Pinkie! Pinkie wait!"
180. >You dash out of the club after her.
181. >You need to explain all of this.
182. >It was just a misunderstanding.
183. >Once you sat her down and explained things to her, she'd be right as rain.
184. >After all, you DID love Pinkie Pie.
185. >You just DESPISED Fluttershy at the moment.
186. >You jog along the streets, looking for your special somep0ny, and catch a glance of Pink cut into an alleyway.
187. >You chase after it.
188. "Pinkie? Pinkie listen, I can explain everythi-"
189. >Your vision goes black as you feel something hard slam into the back of your skull.
190. >Your sight is hazy and blurred, from both the cider and the impact.
191. >"Grab the mare, she's coming with us. I'll handle this one."
192. >That voice...
193. >Where have you heard that voice before?
194. >A you hear the clop of hooves and the voice is right next to you.
195. "You should never have come back to my city, you fuckin' jerkoff.
196. >Fuck.
197. >Mahonie.

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>Day 938 in Equestria >You sat at the lake just outside Ponyville, a fishing pole in your hand and a toothpick in your mouth. >You've been sitting here in the shade of a nearby tree for about an two hours now, and so far you've caught absolutely nothing in the way of fishy prey. >Not that you were really there to fish, of course. >You cracked a grin as you happily tipped your new cowboy hat forward, casting some much needed shade into your eyes. >You were sure she would have found you by now, but as always you seemed to give her a little too much credit. >A light breeze passed over you and you could catch the light scent of the valley and the flowers that dotted along its hills. >The soft sound of hooves reaches your ears. >Sounds like it's coming from... behind you? >You sniff the air once more. >Grass, flowers, the dirt by the lake and... apples. >Guess she found you. >"Ahem." >You answer her without even looking, still enjoying the shade from your new hat. "What took you?" >"Ah figured you'd be hidin' somewhere more... elaborate, ah suppose. Never thought to look by the lake." >You feel a hoof paw the top of your head and strip the cowboy hat from you, the sun's rays making their way into your vision again. >You looked up and gave a smarmy grin at the orange pony standing over you, as she puts the hat atop her blonde mane. "Something you need, Applejack?" >She cocks an eyebrow in exasperation and lets out a sigh. >"Anon, you said you'd help me out at tha farm today." "IF..." >"IF ah could find ya. And ah did. Just now." >You check your wrist for the time. >The watch you drew in sharpie said it was half past a freckle, but you knew it was probably around three in the afternoon. "It took you a bit longer than last time, didn't it? And here I thought taking your hat would give you the push to find me in record time. Looks like I was mistaken." >Applejack rolls her eyes. >You'd done this little game with her a couple of times before. >Whenever Applejack needed some help around the farm, and needed an extra pair of hands, literally, you would always agree to help. >On one condition. >You would take something of hers and run off, giggling like a little girl. >If she could find you, then you'd help her out. >Today, you had taken her hat, which was actually pretty comfy to wear. >It also smelled a bit like her hair, and that was an added bonus. >After all, you liked apples. Being a baker, you made apple pies quite regularly. >You hop to your feet and stretch your back. "Alright Ms. Jack, you've got yourself a worker. What do you need?" >"Anon." >She's staring at you intensely, like she's waiting for something. "What?" >"Oh don't 'what' me. Hand it over." "I have no idea what you're talking about." >She approaches you and cranes her head towards you pants. "Wait what the hell are you do-" >she bites down on something sticking out of your pocket, and pulls out a big red bow. >Dammit. >"Anon, why'd you take Applebloom's bow?" "Payback." >She tilts her head. "Long story, pubes are involved." >"Wait, pu-" "Let's just go back to the farm and get to work, shall we?" >"But I-... ah whatever, fine." ------- >"Alraght, Anon, how're ya feelin'?" "Ow." >"Yeah, you're gonna be fahn." "Ow." >You spent three hours down at Sweet Apple Acres helping Applejack with some applebucking. >Now, I know what you're thinking. >How can a HUMAN possibly help a pony when it comes to applebucking? >Three words. >Cast >Iron >Arm >For three hours, you basically went through the orchard bitch slapping trees, the apples that hung from them falling into the baskets below. >Your left arm may have been made of iron, but it still felt things like a normal hand. >And right now, it felt like hell. >Applejack fans herself with her hat and gives you a smile. >"Thanks again Anon, ah appreciate yer help with all this. Big Mac's been laid out with a cold that's somethin' fierce. I'm surprised we were able to get all those trees bucked in time." >You wipe the sweat from your forehead with your bandanna and give her a confused look. "In time for what?" >"Oh, Pinkie didn't tell ya? We're headin' out to Manehatten t'night for some sort of party in the city." "Am I invited?" >Suddenly Pinkie bursts out from one of the apple baskets. >PP: "Of course you're invited, silly! Why wouldn't I invite YOU to a party?!" "Because I'm a wanted man in Manehatten?" >PP: "Oh. Right. Oh well, I'm sure we can figure something out on the way there!" >AJ: "Wait, wanted man?" "So what's the party for? And why are you throwing one in Manehatten of all places?" >PP: "I'm not the host this time, actually! There's a big dance club opening up downtown, and I thought that a little vacation with the whole gang would put a great big smile on everyone's faces!" "Huh, well that sounds good I suppose. How're we getting there? Train?" >AJ: "What does he mean, 'wanted man'?" >PP: "No, we've used trains too much in the story, so I pulled some strings with Twilight and she's agreed to TELEPORT us there!" "Teleportation?" >PP: "Teleportation!" "With all the bipitty-bopitty-boop, the light and the POP?" >PP: "Yup!" >AJ: "Is nopony gonna tell me why he's a wanted ma-" "OH MY GOD I PUNCHED OUT A COP, OKAY?" >AJ: "You did what?!" "COP. MY FIST. HIS FACE. IT HAPPENED." >AJ: "Whyd'ja punch a cop in tha face?!" "I DIDN'T LIKE HIS FACE, OKAY? FUCK." >PP: "We should get home and get ready for the trip." "Fine. Scoot over." >You step into the basket with Pinkie, mime a motion of flushing a toilet, and hold your nose like you're about to jump into a pool. >Pinkie and you spin and sink into the basket and disappear below the apples. >Applejack's mind is too busy getting fucked to comprehend it. ------- >You stand outside Twilight's library with Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash and the yellow one that yearned for your balls with an aching passion. >Creepy. >Twilight and Spike came out of the library and joined your little circle. >TS: "Alright then, everyp0ny ready for the jump?" >You all nod, Fluttershy not breaking her unending, unceasing stare directed at your goods. >Son-of-a-bitch. >Twilight's horn glows with a bright purple haze, and suddenly you're being whisked away through a dark void. >And in an instant, music. >SO MUCH MUSIC. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfH5BnFrsmM >The dance has BEGUN. >All eight of you mix in with the huge crowd inside the club dancing to the beat of the music that pulsates through the building. >This ain't half bad so far, actually. >You're the only human in the joint, but you don't mind. >There's a ton of ponies enjoying their wild night, you might as well join in. >You leap over the crowd to where Pinkie's dancing and begin rocking out with her. >The two of you FEEL like GODS. >The two of you LOOK like you're on FIRE. >Real fire. >You're dancing that badly; ponies are starting to think you may be having a stroke. TIME PASSES >So fucking drunk oh god. >You're still dancing around the room, the whole gang stumbling along with you to more music curtsey of Vinyl Scratch. >Each and everyone of you is holding a mug of hard cider. >You have had much, MUCH more than just one. >Spike is shimmying next to Rarity who will NOT stop saying the word "DARLING." over and over again. >Twilight is just... spinning around with some colt she met. >He's magenta. >You know that's normal for Equestria, but seriously. >Dude. >Magenta Colt. >fuckinGAY >You and Pinkie are having the time of your lives, both of you wasted out of your stupid little skulls. >You swing your head around haphazardly and shout so she can hear you. "DID I EVVVVER TELL YOU I LURVE YOU?!" >You can make out a small gasp, and feel a passionate kiss meet your lips. >Awwwwwww yyyyyeeeeeaaaaaaah. >You open your eyes slightly. >Awwwwwww NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. >Flutter- >Flut- >Fluttersh- >Fl- >FLUTTERSHY FUCK NO NO NO NO NO >You grasp her face and with all your might you pry her off of you. >You gasp for fucking air. >FS: "Oh Anon, I LOVES YOU TOOOOOOOO!" "NOT YOU." >FS: "WHA?" "NOT YOU." >"Yes, 'LOVE YOU.'" "NO." >TS: "WHAT?" >You breathe deep and shout, your eyes closed again in fury. "I SAID I DO NOT LOVE YOU, YOU CREEPY FUCKING PONY." >The music has stopped. >The whole room is silent. >You're seething. >"You... you don't love me?..." "No! Get that through your THICK fucking skull! I do NOT love you!" >You open your eyes. >Oh. >Oh shit. >You're staring back at big, blue, tear filled eyes. >You glance to the right of them. >Fluttershy is standing next to Pinkie, still hazy eyed and hiccupping. >You meant to shout at Fluttershy. >Instead, you shouted at the last thing you ever wanted to make cry. >Pinkie lets out a small croak, looks down dejectedly, then runs off and out of the dance club. >Nice job, you fucking nonce. "Pinkie! Pinkie wait!" >You dash out of the club after her. >You need to explain all of this. >It was just a misunderstanding. >Once you sat her down and explained things to her, she'd be right as rain. >After all, you DID love Pinkie Pie. >You just DESPISED Fluttershy at the moment. >You jog along the streets, looking for your special somep0ny, and catch a glance of Pink cut into an alleyway. >You chase after it. "Pinkie? Pinkie listen, I can explain everythi-" >Your vision goes black as you feel something hard slam into the back of your skull. >Your sight is hazy and blurred, from both the cider and the impact. >"Grab the mare, she's coming with us. I'll handle this one." >That voice... >Where have you heard that voice before? >A you hear the clop of hooves and the voice is right next to you. "You should never have come back to my city, you fuckin' jerkoff. >Fuck. >Mahonie.