Title: Giant gummy and travel by wire green textification Author: waterapple Pastebin link: http://pastebin.com/fi5F2Erc First Edit: Sunday 13th of May 2012 01:38:53 AM CDT Last Edit: Sunday 13th of May 2012 01:38:53 AM CDT May 06 15:28:00         We need more original content May 06 15:28:21         >walking down a street, suddenly giant gummy May 06 15:29:36         >giant alligator seems to just be standing there, somehow it seems to be looking at everything at once May 06 15:30:27         >whatever, keep walking May 06 15:31:14         >crashing sounds coming from the giant alligators direction May 06 15:31:51         >look back at giant gummy and he's still just standing there May 06 15:33:37         >huh, that's odd, go to top of hill for a better look May 06 15:34:29         >more crashing noise from gummys direction, when you reach the top of the hill he's still standing just like he was before May 06 15:34:40         >no wait, what's that behind him? May 06 15:36:13         >see trail of destruction behind his legs, all connected unlike footsetps May 06 15:37:41         >shit, he's following me May 06 15:38:30         >walk left, crashing noise from gummy, trail of destruction goes parralel to you May 06 15:39:11         >walk closer, whoops, there goes the sports stadium that was behind him May 06 15:39:34         Any input? May 06 15:40:14         >implying i have writing skills or a plan May 06 15:40:50         >so it's doing what i do? weird. May 06 15:41:59         >decide tojust stay still, try to attract the attention of anyone in the area May 06 15:42:32         >lolnope, everyone's busy with the giant alligator, who cares about some loony? May 06 15:43:47         >keep trying anyway, god fucking damnit i should have brought my cellphone with me May 06 15:45:03         >It's getting late, screw this i'm going home May 06 15:46:37         >as you walk slowly home, that loud rumbling keeps going, looking back at the giant alligator you see it's still following you, oh well, you're tired and fuck sleeping outside May 06 15:47:40         >get home and go to bed, you're tired and this can wait until morning May 06 15:48:09         >>you wake up and look outside, everythings normal May 06 15:49:50         >>you put on your spacesuit and drive to the office for work May 06 15:51:50         >>You finish the meeting with the darth vader headed cats and go to get lunch May 06 15:52:46         >>you're eating a cloudburger with a side of raw spaghetti when your phose starts beeping May 06 15:55:07         >wake up, wow that was a strange dream, giant alligators folling you and some weird office thing, you don't have any idea what to call it. May 06 15:56:26         >meh, saturday morning cartoon time. May 06 15:56:46         >as you get out of bed you hear a loud rumbling in the distance May 06 15:57:20         >run to a doorframe, that's what you do in an earthquake right? May 06 15:58:14         >rumbling stops and after a while you go to make sure nothing's broken May 06 15:58:27         >rumbling starts again FUCK May 06 15:59:18         >turn on the tv anyway, no earthquake is going to get in the way of THIS mans cartoons May 06 16:00:21         >damnit, all the channels are running news, some bullshit about a giant alligator May 06 16:00:34         >GIANT ALLIGATOR!? May 06 16:01:21         >go outside and look around, yep, looks real from here May 06 16:02:30         >call friends, after some convincing they come around, thinking you've probably gone crazy from the stress of a giant alligator breaking things May 06 16:03:21         >when the first one arrives, you convince him to watch you move around May 06 16:04:05         >he seems convinced when you show him that it stops when you stand still and moves when you do May 06 16:05:15         >go sit down, wait for other firends and try to figure out what to do May 06 16:06:11         >you decide to call the cops and tell them how it's going to move, then move in that way May 06 16:06:54         >keep getting hung up on, think of using morse code May 06 16:07:34         >if only you knew more than two letters of it May 06 16:08:01         >waitaminuite INTERNET MAN SAVES THE DAY AGAIN May 06 16:09:19         >you write down a message and translate it into morse May 06 16:10:22         >police take a bit more notice this time May 06 16:11:18         >they tell you to stay in you house so you don't end up breaking more shit May 06 16:12:26         >okay May 06 16:13:09         >All sorts of suited guys show up, start asking questions May 06 16:13:59         Fuck i have no idea for what next May 06 16:15:28         The giant alligator excusion zone? May 06 16:17:40         Bye bye everything between gummys current position and there May 06 16:18:50         Sounds like a long term thing, clearing the way would take at least weeks May 06 16:21:31         >some of the police and suited guys stick around, looks like they are pretty keen on you saying at home May 06 16:23:22         >oh well, guess it's time to have a movie night May 06 16:24:28         >suited guys insist on bringing the pizza themselves, you aren't going to atgue against free pizza May 06 16:26:53         >finish watching movies with the cops and spooks and go to bed May 06 16:29:31         >More people come over the next few months, there's talk of getting you a house in the middle of nowhere, seems like a decent plan May 06 16:31:36         >a few more months pass, project alligator walk begins May 06 16:34:45         >you start packing most of your stuff into moving vans, and move the rest into a totally sweet motorhome the government got you for the trip May 06 16:37:15         >after weeks of S    L   O   W travveling with some kickass tanks you arrive at the millitary base the government built around you sweetr new home May 06 16:39:06         >the view of the forest surrounding camp gummy is pretty awesom May 06 16:40:12         >american dream status: Acheived   May 06 16:41:53         Is it done? May 06 16:42:11         I have no idea what to do next, if anything May 06 16:44:10         >TFW the government is aying you to chill in a luxury mansion with your friends, doing cool experiments with the millitary       May 06 16:44:25         I think i may have gone too far May 06 16:45:09         oh well, even a shitty story is better than no story May 06 16:47:51         Any ideas for another story? May 06 16:48:32         I think the premise of this one was "Giant gummy is following you, what do?" May 06 16:49:25         How about you try? May 06 16:51:03         I was thinking more pinkie left him alone for a while, and he's just haning around May 06 16:52:29         It's also be pretty easy to shoehorn in another setting, but that would have a good chance of turning the story into shit if it isn't already May 06 16:53:04         Feel free to come up with your own interpretations of what the fuck is going on May 06 16:53:38         At what point did you catch on to what i was doing in the double > bit? May 06 16:55:50         It just seemed like the right thing to do to include a dream where things were normal then reveal that not having the GIANT ALLIGATOR was the dram, rather than the cliche return to status quo May 06 16:56:52         If you want to post it somewhere or add on to it, i'm cool with that May 06 16:57:16         >implying i could stop someone from doing that anyway May 06 16:57:49         Just a sec, jet me get a book to plagarise from May 06 16:58:50         I',m going to try greentexting some arthur c clarke May 06 16:59:22         Just goota find a short one May 06 17:01:28         I'll now attempt to greentextify " travel by wire!" by arthur c clarke May 06 17:02:11         fuck this is narrative May 06 17:02:41         I'm trying to convert an existing story into greentext style May 06 17:02:59         Art. May 06 17:03:18         Damn straight. May 06 17:04:06         >Implying there was a great artform before May 06 17:08:01         I'm going to have to severely butcher thiis, cutting out the set up and such to make it fit the style     May 06 17:08:47         >YFW we built teleporters 30 years after televisions May 06 17:09:48         >transmittan test objects with our sweet new teleporter radio May 06 17:10:10         i'm using a story by arthur c clarke written in 1937 May 06 17:10:50         >Our face when it turned a wooden cube into a bunch of wooden spheres May 06 17:11:50         >Shit looks like an old shitty tv picture of a cube, just lots of balls May 06 17:12:27         >Implying we could transmit complex objects like art or people May 06 17:13:56         >Buildan delta ray scanners, tryan for a better radioteleporter May 06 17:14:54         >Tests with the new system are looking good, resolution is at the microscopic level May 06 17:15:57         >Steal guinea pig from stupid biologists while they arent looking, use it to test radioteleporter for the glory of the physicist master race May 06 17:16:51         >shove it into our machine, comes out the other end dead, biologists are butthurt and refust to do autopsy May 06 17:17:48         >apparently it had the only specimen of some germ they were working on May 06 17:18:23         >not making more than one specimen of your project May 06 17:18:39         >ISHYGDDT May 06 17:20:03         >generate high frequency field in their lab to make them sick, biologists finally see reason and do the autopsy May 06 17:21:23         >they say it died of shock and to use a blindfold next time, also they got a new lock to keep us out May 06 17:22:12         >Implying their shitty lock could stop us May 06 17:22:36         >xray their lock and tell the idiot biologists what the combination is May 06 17:23:52         >implying that anyone other thatn the chemists the next floor up had any chance of being serious rivals to us May 06 17:25:05         >blindfold another ginea pig and teleport it, Seems to be fine afterwards May 06 17:25:31         >kill it and do an autopsy FOR SCIENCE, put whats left afterwards into a museum May 06 17:27:19         >make faster teleporter to remove need for blindfold, seems to work. Kill the guinea pig and stuff it for the museum like the last one May 06 17:28:07         >time for human tests, need someone disposeable, grab professor of greek or something form 197th floor May 06 17:29:17         >he survived, but diddn't get to have him stuffed for the museum. Fucking beauraucrats. May 06 17:30:54         >seems safe so we try teleportation for ourselvs, decide to make a profit from our teleporter May 06 17:31:49         >fucking press won't believe it until they get a turn for themself, some fatty tried to get a go but screw him we don't want some fatty breaking our teleporter May 06 17:33:24         >use the excitement from the demonstration to start a company to make more teleporters, taunt losers from other department with possible future funding May 06 17:34:02         About half way done May 06 17:35:42         >design commercial version of our teleporter, had ceremony teleporting a union jack to france May 06 17:36:10         >MFW plitician actually believed their button did anything May 06 17:37:13         >Customs face when we start selling trips from london to france for 2 bucks a trip May 06 17:38:51         >run cables around europe, put in underwater cables. May 06 17:39:56         >team up with the post office for intertown teleporters, everyone is using us because fuck driving May 06 17:40:24         You guys like this? May 06 17:43:36         >accidents happen, still less than roads so its all fine May 06 17:45:37         >hilarious accidents leave people thinner than when they got in, set up resistance coils to replicate and sell as weight loss method May 06 17:47:08         >after several hilarious accidents leases people disfigured, stupid tv star bint tries to sue us May 06 17:47:38         >Her face when engineer explains what she would ACTUALLY look like if there had been an accident May 06 17:48:19         >it's all mostly fixed these days anyway, so who gives a fuck? May 06 17:49:42         >customers ask for service to mars and venus, idiots cant into radioengineering May 06 17:50:18         >Implying i'd use teleporters when i halped build the things May 06 17:50:41         >get on rocket to new yourk, got to keep an appointment May 06 17:50:50         that's it May 06 17:51:35         Travel by wire by arthur c clarke translated to greentext May 06 17:55:26         Any ideas for what next?