Title:           Rage Quit *Hazardus_Havard*
Author:          unwantedmlp
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/CzXNdWkU
First Edit:      Saturday 16th of March 2013 06:41:07 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 16th of March 2013 06:41:07 AM CDT

 
>Day Sore Loser In Equestria.
>You are Anon.
>And you are a fucking winner!
"FUCK YOU DAD! I'M A WINNER!"
>You just won the presidential election against Celestia for a new democratic ruling system.
>Celestia nearly won it, but she fucked up big time when she decided to make Twilight an alicorn.
>Nobody wants /another/ princess to have rule over them, so you are declared a winner by a landslide.
>You're new title is the Kick-Ass Super Mojo Presidential King of Equestria.
>Your first action as a person with such a badass title is to rename the lands Equestria: Land of the Neckbeards.
>"Fuck this shit!"
>Oooh, Celestia's mad!
>"I should've won that!"
>Damn, son! She looks she just stepped on a lego with thumbtacks and Tabasco sauce all over it!
>"Fuck you! Fuck you! And /especially/ fuck YOU!"
>That's not cool, Celestia. Telling a filly to fuck off.
>"Fuck this shit, I'm outta here!"
>Holy fuck, Celestia done rage quit!
>She immediately throws the sun away from the planet, turning everything dark before flying off while screaming.
"Why you gotta be like that?"
>Damn, shit's real dark.
"You fo' real? Why you gotta be such a bitch?"
>Eternal night for a long time... almost like an eternity.
>Fuck that shit!
>You'll make your own fucking magical sun of quadruple rainbows and leprechaun shit! With blackjack and hookers! Fuck yeah!
>You /were/ going to take Celestia as your royal bitch, but forget that shit!
>Now you got Luna as your royal bitch to help make things cool with the ponies!
>You use your pimp hand and give her the D so she'll listen to her.
>Luna's so much better than Celestia. Fucking rage quitting and taking the sun.
>What a bitch.