Title:           Blooming Moon 1
Author:          notkickass222urmom
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/84SU3ejZ
First Edit:      Sunday 12th of June 2016 01:38:24 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Sunday 12th of June 2016 01:38:24 PM CDT

>bmc #1, ch. 1
It had to be done.
 
>https://www.fimfiction.net/story/48755/moonrise
This is book 1 of the Blooming Moon Chronicles by BlackRoseRaven. Description doesn't look promising, but with a 35:1 ratio, how bad could it be?
 
>"I can only begin to imagine how difficult this night of all nights must be for you." the ivory equine said gently, her ephemeral rainbow mane spilling over her face and past her tall horn.
>"Thou did what thy had to, my sister… as thou often tells me oftentimes, blame not thyself."
Well that answers that question. But let's continue...
 
>Luna going to Nightmare Night
>Celestia tries to tell her that society has changed (i.e., don't yell at them you dummy), but she doesn't try very hard
>Luna goes to say goodbye to Scrivener before she leaves
And so we meet Mr. Wonderful:
>Scrivener Blooms: a court poet of Canterlot, an earth pony with a talent for verse that had won him a place in the heart and soul of Equestria.
>his coat was charcoal, his mane and tail blanch-white and the eyes behind simple black glasses a deep chestnut
>He stood with his side towards her, giving a clear view of his cutie mark: a black rose blossom, with a raven feather quill overtop this.
Well, I guess "white and black" isn't as bad as "red and black". That's a pretty edgy cutie mark though.
 
Here's what we learn about "Scrivy" in chapter 1:
>court poet, etc, etc
>has some kind of rivalry with Twilight
>assigned by Celestia as Luna's assistant
>he treats her like a normal pony!
>he lives on a nocturnal schedule for her sake
>he has a pet pseudodragon (lizard with wings) named Samael that sends letters like Spike
>actually it's a pseudodragon skeleton (undead, reanimated by Luna)
Also, him and Luna spend like half the chapter flirting with each other. But it's not like we didn't already know where this was going...
 
 
 
 
>bmc #1, ch. 2-5
The pace of this thing is ridiculously slow. Fortunately it's quick to read, as it's somewhat predictable and unnecessarily verbose.
 
Luna and her totally, definitely, 1000% platonic friend "Scrivy" spend a lot of time together doing normal platonic-friend things, like talking, holding hooves, and sleeping in the same bed 5 days a week.
 
In chapter 2, Celestia sends Luna and Scrivener on a secret mission to collect some ancient artifacts from the vaults under the old Everfree castle. This mission is totally, definitely, 1000% perfectly safe, and by the way, Luna, how about you spend a month practicing battle magic before you set off?
 
So Luna spends the month practicing battle magic. Celestia spends the month treating Luna like a six year old for no apparent reason and being unnecessarily cryptic about the details of their mission (which is 10000% perfectly safe, by the way). Finally, midway through chapter 5, Luna and Scrivy set off. The chapter ends with them having just entered the Everfree.
 
Progress so far: 41,150 words, or 53% of the first book, or 0.93% of the overall series.
 
 
 
 
 
>bmc #1, ch. 6-10
 
Luna and Scrivy are on a mission to retrieve some artifacts from the old Everfree castle for Celestia. Upon arrival, they're attacked by four Nightmare spirits that offer the usual "vast cosmic power" and so on. (Our pure and virtuous heroes are not tempted in the least, of course.) Luna destroys them all, though one somehow manages to hide for a bit inside Scrivy's memories, so they have an excuse to look at Scrivy's unbelievably tragic backstory:
>parents beat him
>lock him in a literal doghouse when he misbehaves
>make him sleep outside like a proper mudpone slave
>etc.
 
Afterward, Luna and Scrivy spend a day with Twilight and friends. Literally everyone knows that they're in love, but they still haven't said anything to each other. Eventually they go deliver the artifacts to Celestia.
 
Then we get to Chapter 9.
>Scrivy is missing
>Luna goes to ask Celestia what's up
>Celestia's decked out in her old battle armor, with the Elements of Harmony forged into the helm
>Celestia monologues for a bit
>she's had visions of Ragnarok
>Equestria needs to go to war or her ponies will be too weak to survive
>also, mud pones = worst pones
>Luna and Twilight think that's a load of shit, so Celestia tries to kill them
>she also tries to kill Scrivy, who she's brought to use as leverage
>Luna returns to NMM form (but not evil, mmkay, just misunderstood) and the two fight in mid-air
>Luna wins by stabbing Celestia in the chest, and smashes the elements
>suddenly, Celestia realizes that she was totally wrong! friendship and harmony is 100% the way to go
>rather than let Celestia take the blame for her bullshit, Luna announces to the public she's gone evil again, and then runs off to hide in the woods making out with Scrivy (who she magically cured and maybe made immortal)
>the end (of book 1)
 
I thought we were headed for your standard Empire/Rebellion storyline, but I think this outcome is actually even worse!
Progress: 76585 words, or 1.72% of the series
