Title:           John Marston in Equestria
Author:          Yoohoo
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/793qc6QV
First Edit:      Friday 30th of September 2016 04:10:12 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Friday 30th of September 2016 04:14:55 PM CDT

>You awaken with a start
>You open your eyes and stare up at the sky
>Was it always this blue?
>Were you dead?
>You bring up one of your gloved hands and feel at your chest
>No blood
>No bullet wounds
>No pain
>But upon further investigation, your clothes still had bullet holes in them
>Damn that Ross
>Bastard couldn't just let you live peacefully
>But somehow you always knew it'd end like this
>He wasn't gonna stop til all of Dutch's gang were in the ground
>You just hope that Jack and Abigail got out safe
>But
>Other than that, the most pressing question on your mind is
>Just what was this place?
>Was this heaven?
>Was this what all those priests were yapping on about in their churches?
>You knew better
>You weren't going there
>Heaven's no place for a man like you
>But this didn't look like any sort of hell you'd ever heard of
>So just where the hell were you?
>With a grunt of exertion you sit up and look around
>There's birds chirping in the trees
>There's a fence
>You look like you're on the side of some sorta dirt road
>You take a deep breath and stand, picking your hat up and putting it back on your head
>Much better
>You check over all your equipment
>If anything, you were a prepared man
>Lasso
>Schofield
>Hunting knife
>And everything else you needed
>Upon further inspection, you're on a hill
>What better place to get a lay of the land from than here?
>You start making your way up the road towards the top of the hill
>In some ways you were almost curious about what you'd see on the other side
>It was a sort of anxiousness that you'd never quite felt before
>At least not til you tasted Abigail's cooking
>That makes you smile just a bit
>You eventually stand atop the hill
>And the sight before you is...
>Well it's something straight out of some book you'd expect Jack to read
>All these colors
>It was nothing like the plains outside your home
>This was something like a painting
 
>Some sorta colorful town way down there
>Didn’t look like anything in Texas or Mexico, that’s for damn sure
>You squint your eyes
>You can just make out some activity going on down there
>Maybe there were other people here
>Maybe one of them could tell you where you were
>What a walk it was gonna be to get there though
>You were no stranger to a bit of walking
>But
>You whistle for your horse
>Nothing
>One more time
>Still nothing
>Well
>Better start walking
>You pull your hat a bit lower to keep the sun out of your eyes and start your journey
>The spurs on your boots clink a bit with each step
>You end up losing track of time for a bit
>And before you know it, you’ve arrived
>You stand on a bridge the crosses over a small creek
>Must be some kinda rear entrance to the town though
>There’s no one here
>You lean over the side of the bridge and take a look at your reflection
>Yeah, still the same
>You almost get wrapped up in your own thoughts before the familiar sound of hooves reaches your ears
>Finally, someone else to tell you where you were
>Sounds like a woman humming too
>As the sound gets closer, you turn around
“S’cuse me miss, you mind tellin’ me just where I am?”
>”Hm? Wha-AAAAH! A monster!!”
>It’s a bit much all at once
>You realized you’d spoken to nothing but a horse and looked for its rider
>But
>There was no one there
>And to top it all off
>Did that horse just speak?
>Before you’ve even got a chance to ask yourself these questions that horse had taken off like a bat outta hell
>Maybe you hit your head too hard on something
>But that horse wasn’t colored like any normal one
>You hop over the bridge and splash some water on your face
>Alright John
>So we got hallucinations now
>You can deal with that
>Maybe you caught something from being too close to Seth and all them corpses
>You hope not
>Right
>You’ll just have to try again
>You walk back over the bridge and start heading towards the center of town
 
>This has definitely gotta be some sort of fever dream or something
>Maybe Abigail’s cooking finally did knock you out
>There’s nothing but horses
>Or rather
>Nothing but ponies
>Everywhere you look it’s more ponies
>Small
>Brightly colored
>Ponies
>And the thing is
>They’re all looking at you like you’re the weird one
>Maybe this is your own personal hell for breaking in all those horses
>Thing is
>Some of these ponies seemed to have wings
>And horns
>There was a crowd gathering around you now, and you felt your hand instinctively start inching for your revolver
>All this hushed talk was starting to get to you
>You quickly draw your revolver and fire it once into the air
>The loud noise is enough to get the attention of some and send a few others scurrying off
“Somebody wanna tell me what in the hell’s goin’ on here?!”
>More of them try to run
>You knew how to deal with horses that tried to run
>You quickly whip out your lasso and give it a little twirl
>You got your sights set on one
>There’s a brown one that looks almost normal
>You toss out your lasso
>Bingo
>You feel the tug as it wraps around the pony’s neck
>It’s much easier than wrangling a mustang
>In fact, you’ve got it pulled in in no time at all
>You fish around in one of your pouches for a carrot or something
>Horses were horses right?
“Whoa there, easy.”
>You offer the carrot to it, to which it looks almost scared of
“What’s the matter, you ponies don’t eat carrots or something?”
>It shakily takes it from you, though with its front hooves instead of its mouth
“Now if I’m not goin’ crazy, which I’m damn well sure I am, you can talk, right? Every one of you can talk. Now, tell me where I am.”
>The pony opens its mouth to speak and hesitates a bit
>”Y-You’re in Ponyville! Can you please let me go?”
>Is this some kinda joke?
“Ponyville? Didn’t know you ponies had a sense of humor. That don’t sound like any town I’ve ever heard of.“
 
>”N-No I’m serious! You’re in Ponyville! That’s the name of this town!”
>This pony sounded like they were telling the truth
>They also sounded like a woman
>And if nothing else, you were still a gentleman
>You sigh and get off the pony, removing the lasso from its neck
>May as well her it keep the carrot
“My apologies, miss. Where exactly is this Ponyville located?”
>”Er, Well, that’d be Equestria.”
>Sounds just like a place suited for horses
>”Do you want your carrot back?”
“Keep it. As an apology for lassoin’ you like I did.”
>”Well, it was a bit scary at first, but it was a little bit fun! Thank you mister… Uh.”
“Marston. Just call me John.”
>A few ponies look at you, but otherwise seem to continue with their day
>Maybe this is normal for them
>Maybe not
>You open the door to the building in the center of town and step inside
>To be frank, it wasn’t quite different from some of the buildings you were used to in Texas
>Some familiarity at least
>You make your way up to a desk where a secretary is seeming to work
>It’s nothing but weird seeing ponies doing these jobs you’ve seen other people do countless times
>”Yes, can I help- Oh.”
“Afternoon, miss. I reckon I’m a bit lost to say the least. Can you point me to whoever’s in charge around here?”
>She points to a nearby door
>”That’d be Mayor Mare, but she’s busy with somepony else right no-“
>You’ve already walked through the door
>”Excuse me! But just what is the meaning of this interruption.”
>There’s another one of those ponies, this time wearing spectacles and some sort of dress tie
“Pardon me ma’am. Just tryin’ to get some information.”
>”And you could not wait until I was done?”
“No can do. Dunno what brought me here but I need some answers. From what I hear you’re the mayor ‘round these parts.”
>”That… That is correct.”
“Then I was hopin’ you could help me figure out what brought me here.”
 
>”Look, sir. Whatever you are. I’m very busy today. I’ve got reports coming in from all over southern Ponyville about break-ins from a gang of Diamond Dogs. I really can’t be dealing with you right now, along with that.”
>Diamond Dogs?
>Like some sorta wolf?
>But breaking in and stealing stuff?
>Doesn’t add up
“I bet I could help ya with your little dog problem.”
>”You could?”
“But only if I get some help in return.”
>”Look, sir. I’ve got no idea who or what brought you here.”
>You put your hand firmly on the desk
“Then your problems stay your own and I’ll find someone else that can help me.”
>”Hold on just one moment! I-I may not be able to help you, but I do know somepony who can. I can put you in touch with them if you would still assist me with this Diamond Dog problem.”
>The more things change, the more they stay the same
>You hold your belt and nod
“If you keep your word, I’ll keep mine. Now you just point me in the direction of them dogs.”
>”They’re just south of here, right outside the town. They’ve set up a den underground and everything. Please mister, it’s only a matter of time before they start moving inward.”
“Right right. I’ll see what I can do.”
>You make your way out as she thanks you
>”Hey John!”
>You look over
>It’s that pony you lassoed earlier
“Thought you’d scurried off after that incident.”
>”No, I said it was fun, remember?”
>What kinda horse enjoys being wrangled like that?
>”Anyways, I overheard your conversation with the mayor!”
“You spyin’ on me?”
>”A little bit. But I wanna help you!”
“And how do you reckon you’re gonna do that?”
>”Well, I dunno, but you look like you’ve got the outfit of a cowpony! I heard that cowponies had trusty steeds they rode on.”
“And you think you’re gonna be able to support me if I ride ya.”
>”…Maybe.”
“Fine. If anything else it’ll be good to have someone who knows the area.”