Title:           Celestia Greentexts: Too Many Gifts
Author:          Wiggy
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/2tHbnNC3
First Edit:      Sunday 14th of February 2016 07:25:38 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Last edit on: Sunday 14th of February 2016 09:17:13 PM CDT

>"Please, Princess Celestia, radiant ruler of Equestria and light of all ponies, allow me to take your hoof in marriage. I will be the sunlight of your life, greeting you each morning as your sun does."
>Celestia sighed, not dreamily out of admiration, but out of slight irritation.
>Each year on Hearts and Hooves Day, she always received letters of this caliber.
>She wasn't one to mock others, but...
>She really wasn't impressed, putting it lightly.
>What was it with these ponies thinking she enjoyed being sent poems gushing about her beauty?
>Was it her status?
>Despite what many ponies thought, Celestia wasn't that big a fan of being treated like the royalty she was.
>If she was going to keep getting these kinds of letters, she wanted one to at least be very casual in nature.
>It really was tiring to constantly get letters that sounded like they came out of a medieval play.
>And she's been around long enough to know what those are like.
>But that wasn't even the worst part of today.
>After the letters usually came-
>"Princess Celestia! If you may humor me, I would like to gift you something for Hearts and Hooves Day!"
>A bouquet of roses was offered to Celestia by a pony in noon court.
>She resisted the urge to roll her eyes, smiling and taking the flowers.
"Thank you, my little pony. I'll be sure to take good care of them."
>Just like the other two hundred thousand bouquets that have been integrated into the royal garden.
>He smiled. "Thank you, your highness. A ruler so lovely deserves flowers that match her in appearance."
>Oh, please.
>When he left, the next one came in, again using precious royal time to gift her something in order to win her heart.
>This time, it was a heart-shaped box of chocolates.
>Because when you wanted to impress a girl, you brought her the most common gifts of all.
>"Your wonderful, beautifulness, I bring you fine Germane chocolates for Hearts and Hooves Day."
>Like she needed these. It was bad enough she was such a fan of cake.
>Taking them as she did the roses, Celestia smiled.
"Thank you. I will enjoy them greatly."
>Maybe she could get Luna to eat them.
>That pony needed some meat on those bones.
>This continued throughout the day, Celestia receiving gifts such as paintings of herself, more chocolates, and even jewelry.
>To say it got old would be an understatement.
>Leaving the throne room, Celestia carried with her well over fifty different items in her magic, stuffed together closely so as not to be too much of an obstruction.
>When she returned to her chambers, she sorted through the gifts, making mental notes of what to do with each of them.
>Paintings go to gallery, jewelry to be sold and profits given to charity, chocolates to go to Luna.
>It went on like that.
>In all honesty, she'd been doing this so long, she kind of wanted to see a stallion finally work up the courage to propose to her in public, rather than on paper.
>It'd make for an interesting day, that's for sure.
>Having finished going through the gifts, the princess made sure they were sent to their proper places, while she would deliver the chocolates to her sister personally.
>A quick trip down the hall and there was the door to Luna's chambers.
>She knocked a few times.
"Luna? Could you let me in, please?"
>The door opened to a somewhat disgruntled Luna.
>The chocolates were pressed to the blue alicorn almost immediately.
>All ten boxes.
>"The gesture is generous, sister, but I've my own surplus of fine chocolates to dine on."
>Of course.
>Celestia wasn't the only princess here, after all.
"Are you sure? I definitely don't need these. I'm big enough as is!"
>Luna scoffed.
>"Please, Celestia. You've always been self-conscious for no valid reason. You're as thin as you've always been."
>The older sister poked the younger's stomach, grimacing.
"Easy for you to say. You're almost a skeleton!"
>Luna returned her sister's rather invasive gesture, poking the sun pony in her belly.
>"Do you feel fat of any sort down there? You've nothing to worry about. In fact, I believe you need these more than I."
"Come on, Luna! I had several letters come in today telling me how 'luscious and beautiful' my butt was! What does that tell you?"
>"You have naturally wide hips?"
>Celestia groaned, turning around and walking away with the chocolates.
>"They aren't wrong about your posterior, sister!"
>The thing about Luna was that you could never tell if she was being informative or a smart-aleck.
>Celestia returned to her room and placed the chocolates on her dresser.
>Every year.