Title:           Fucking Gary (Short)
Author:          Swift_M0nkey
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/s8HZRk0P
First Edit:      Sunday 10th of March 2013 08:37:34 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Sunday 10th of March 2013 08:37:34 PM CDT

>Day pocket monstrosities in Equestria
>You get yourself up the way a true man does
>Ripping a huge fart
>Them bitches said you needed an alarm clock
>Don't need anything because you have your trusty anus
>You walk over to the bathroom and take a quick shit, quick shower, and almost a quick shave but you slice your face and have to put a bandage over it
>You head downstairs for some cereal and eggs when that oh so fucking familiar doorbell rings
>Moonwalk to the door and open it with your foot
>Fluttershy stands there confused as to why you have a bandage on your cheek and are holding a leg up to her
>"Um..."
Shh. There's no need to be upset.
>A nearby lawn mower flies off into the sky
>"Anyways...is Gary your fetish?"
What the fuck did you just fucking say to me, you little bitch?
>She spins in a circle, forming a yellow tornado
>When she stops she's Gary
>Ponkie Po pokes her head out of a bush
>"Actually is Gary."
Get out of here Ponkie!
>Gary steps back and pulls out a pokeball
>You look at him
>"Hah! Our eyes met! We have to engage in battle now!"
>He throws down the ball and Rainbow Dash comes out of it
>She is shivering on the ground and drooling while muttering something about eternal fire and suffering
>"Oh no! Rainbow come back!"
>"NO NO NO NO DON'T MAKE ME GO B-"
>He sucks her back into the ball
>You pull out your secret weapon, the Faggotball
>Gary pulls out his pokedex
>"What is that thing?!"
>"A-Faggotball. Faggotballs-are-used-to-capture-those-that-feel-physical-pleasure-when-a-penis-is-inserted-deep-in-their-anus."
>"OH NO! THAT'S ME!"
>You throw the ball at him and it sucks him in
>It rocks once
>Then twice
>It stops
>You pull out a bat and glare at it
>It rocks again
>A voice calls out from nowhere
>"ALL RIGHT! GARYSHY WAS CAUGHT! WOULD YOU LIKE TO RENAME IT?!"
Yes. Name it Faggot.
>You look around a corner and see that it's Twilight making the voice
Hey.
>She jumps and looks at you
>"PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT PURPLE PONY!"
I can see you talking. Wanna bang?
>"Huh?"
>You grab her and procceed to have consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation
>Better than
>Fucking Gary