Title:           Captain Pone 2/2
Author:          Slasher_Science
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/enT0f0wi
First Edit:      Wednesday 19th of December 2012 12:25:36 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 19th of December 2012 12:25:36 AM CDT

>It has been a few days since you retired the identity of Captain Pone.
>You sit at the kitchen table in your underwear nursing a bottle of cider.
>There's large bags under your eyes.
>Your hair is greasy from not showering.
>The stuble on your face is beginning to make you look like a vagrant.
>You are a broken man.
>The last of your alcohol is drained and you look up.
>A pony sits at the other end of your table.
>A pegasus pony with makeup smeared across her face.
>Her mane is greasier than yours.
A-are you who I think you are?
>You feel fear as she smiles at you.
>"HahaHAHA h-ha?"
>You can't believe some pony has taken up the Joker's persona.
>"You like it? I-I've been watching you... I wanted to see what y-you'd do. And y-you didn't disappoint."
>She licks her lips.
>"You let a filly almost die. Then, y-you let the commissioner- er, mayor take your place..."
>You slam your fist on the table.
The mayor is doing good in my absence!
>"I-I know the truth: there's no going back... You've changed things,"
>Her eyes shift in a twitch,
>"Forever."
>You frown.
Do you want to kill me?
>Jokermare gives a shrill laugh.
>"I-I don't want to kill you! What would I do without you? No. No no... You. Complete. Me."
You're garbage who... Uh, does things for money?
>"D-don't talk like one of them, y-you're not!"
>Her hooves are on the table.
>"See t-to them you're just a f-freak... Like me! They n-need you now, and when they don't... They'll cast you out."
>"L-like a leper... um, If that's okay with you..."
 
 
>She smiles at you and licks her lips with a twitch.
>"A-aren't you gonna ask where Sweetie Belle is?"
>Your eyes widen.
>Without thinking, you reach forward and slam her head on the table.
WHERE IS SHE JOKERMARE?!
>She laughs and wipes some blood from her mouth.
>"Ah... Never start with t-the head, the victim gets all... F-fuzzy."
>You sit back down.
Okay, you wanted me, here I am.
WHERE'S SWEETIE BELLE?!
>"I'll tell you, but you might have to dawn that p-pretty little suit..."
No!
>You smash your bottle on the ground.
Never again! That's my one rule...
>She gives her shrill insane laugh.
>"Oh... Then t-that's the rule you'll have to break to find t-the truth."
>You bolt up and punch her in the face.
>She falls to the floor laughing.
WHERE IS SHE YOU MONSTER?!
>You pick her up and slam her into the wall.
>She gasps and lets out a moan.
>The scent reminds you of Bunny Mare's cloaking mist.
>"I-I'm not a monster, I'm just ahead of the c-curve."
AHHH!
>You slam Jokermare onto the ground and begin beating her about the face as she laughs and moans.
>When you get tired you leave her moaning and discharging on the floor.
>For some reason, you think, her blood is a sticky fluid that only comes from her genitals.
>Odd...
>No time to worry about that, you put on some clothes and run to the hospital.
 
 
>You get to Sweetie Belle's room and burst in.
>The mane six, minus Fluttershy and Rarity are all standing around the bed weeping.
>They turn and notice you.
>Immediately you are tackled by four sobbing ponies.
WHERE IS SHE?!
>They flinch at your deep gravely roar.
Sorry...
>Twilight holds up a piece of paper, "Jokermare took her Anon!"
>You snatch the paper and look at it.
>Written in red crayon is 'HaHAhahaHAHAha' all over the page with a crude drawing of Jokermare carrying Sweetie Belle.
Damn it...
>You should have never left her at your home...
>"Anon,"
>Rainbow Dash grips your shirt, "can we speak in private?"
>The other mares let you go.
Sure?
>Your friends exit the room, leaving you and Rainbow alone.
>She looks at you pleadingly, "You need to become Captain Pone agai-"
No.
>She stares at you with an open mouth.
Never again.
>Her face changes to rage.
>"Sweetie Belle has been foalnapped! She needs to be saved!"
>You look at your hand in a daze.
The last time I was the Pone... A filly almost died...
>Rainbow Dash slaps you across the face.
>"YOU'RE BEING STUPID! THIS ISN'T THE ANON I KNOW! HE WOULDN'T BE THIS SELFISH!"
>You stare at her in awe as she screams at you.
>"YOU'RE JUST A... A SELFISH BABY!"
>With that she huffs and flies out of the window.
 
 
>You are Fluttershy.
>After that delicious beating by Anon, you use one of his socks to finish the job and clean up.
>He was so sexy when he was angry.
>But it's time to move on with your plan.
>You leave.
>After waiting in Mayor Mare's office for an hour, she finally shows up.
>The light flips on and she jumps upon seeing you sitting behind her desk.
G-good evening commissioner...
>She tilts her head.
Um... Mayor.
>"Where is Sweetie Belle?"
>She looks fearful.
Oh. I'll let her go, I just need something in return...
>She gulps.
>"I can give you however many bits you want."
>You sigh.
It's not a-about bits.
>You hold up the lighter taken from Anon's house.
It's about s-sending a m-message...
>You toss the lit lighter onto the desk you covered in lantern fuel before she arrived.
E-everything burns...
>She screams out for her security as you fly out of her window.
>You look back and see the building beginning to smoke.
>Oh dear...
>This was all for Anon.
>For Captain Pone.
>You would do anything to get your time back.
>By any means necessary.
 
 
>You are Anon.
>There's smoke in the air as you walk home with your head down.
>This town was going downhill...
>A phrase surfaces in your mind as you walk.
>"Captain Pone may be super, but... You'll always be my... Hero... Anon..."
>You stop and squeeze your hand tight, your nails digging into your palm.
>This was not who you were...
>Rainbow Dash was right.
>Nothing but a selfish baby.
>This town needed you...
>Ponies needed Captian Pone.
>You begin to run back to your house with a roar.
IT'S PONE TIME!
>After fishing your suit from the trash, you run up to your room and begin getting dressed, having to trade out a sock that is wet for some reason.
>You shave and wash your hair, making it into a nice feathered swoosh again.
>Feeling on top of the world you climb onto your roof.
>Looking out on the night, you breathe in deeply and hold two fingers up to the moon with a dashing smile.
FOR GREEEEAT JUSSSSSTICEEEE!
>You practice a few Pone Kicks and Pone Punches (original moves, donut steel!), then take off into the night.
 
 
>You are Rarity.
>You sit in your workshop, going over some Captain Pone costume alterations you've been dying to try out.
>These nights have been spent sleepless, creating costumes and gadgets for CP.
>You knew he'd be the one to rescue your Sweetie Belle...
>He just HAD to!
>You feel exhausted but keep working.
>The front bell rings as a pony enters.
Who's there? We're clooooosed!~
>Lyra enters your work room and sits down.
>She had been working for you recently, managing the finances.
What is it dear?
>You keep your nose to the grind, not looking at her.
>"You wanted me to do the diligence on the MLP holdings deal again,"
>She pauses.
>"Well... I found some irregularities."
>You sigh.
Their Colt EO is in royal custody.
>"No, not with their numbers, with yours."
>She places a paper down on the desk and smiles,
>"Don't tell me you didn't recognize your baby out there biffing royal carriages in the Equestrian Times..."
>Somehow she had gotten her hooves on a design sheet for an original Captain Pone suit.
>You remove your stylish glasses and frown.
>"What are you building for him now? A rocket carriage?"
>She smiles smugly.
>"I want free dresses for the rest of my life. And giant foam hands."
>With a sigh you lean forward.
Let me get this straight, you think that our client, the only human in the world is secretly a vigilante who spends his nights beating criminals to a pulp with his bare hands, and your PLAN is to blackmail this person?
>She looks frightened suddenly, realizing her hasty mistake.
>She stutters and licks her lips.
Good luck.
>You smile smugly back at her.
>Lyra stands and slides the designs back to you.
>"K-keep that..."
 
 
 
>You are Trixie.
The GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie!
>Sorry
>You are The Great And Powerful Trixie,
>You sit with your cronies, Snips and Snails in The Great And Secret Lair.
>As you discuss this new villain Jokermare, you hear a quiet laugh.
>You look up and see her walk into the room.
Give me one reason why I shouldn't have my colt here tickle your head off?
>It almost looks like she falters at your threat.
>"H-how about a magic trick?"
>Jokermare pulls out a carrot and stabs it into the table.
>What?
>"I'm going t-to make this carrot, disappear..."
>Snips gets up and walks over to her with a glare.
>She quickly grabs his head and slams it down onto the carrot.
>The vegetable is rammed into his mouth and he swallows it, then falls to the floor licking his lips.
>"T-tada..." she holds her hooves up with a smile.
>You tilt your head as Snails stands and licks his lips.
Sit. I want to hear her proposition...
>Jokermare sits.
What do you propose?
>"It's simple... w-we uh, snuggle the Captain."
>You laugh.
If it's so simple why haven't you done it already?
>She frowns, "If you're good at s-something, never do it for free."
How much do you want?
>She licks her lips, "half."
>Snails laughs, "you're crazy! Enough from the clown!"
>He stands up and advances toward her.
>She backs away and holds out a sugar cube.
>You gasp.
>Jokermare backs toward the door, "l-let's not... lick this out of proportion..."
>She opens the door,
>"M-meet me at city hall t-tonight."
 
 
>You are Captain Pone.
>Mayor Mare had signaled you by using the Pone Signal.
>A large lit-up 'CP' blazed in the sky over Ponyville.
>You would have to thank Rarity later.
>When you arrive you find that her office is completely burned out.
>But she seems fine.
>"Captain Pone... It took a lot of cider for me to convince myself to call on you."
>You frown and scan the area, flexing a little.
Have you heard anything about the filly?
>She raises an eyebrow.
>"What's wrong with your voice? Are you sick?"
>You clear your throat.
Don't waste my time.
>She holds out a card to you.
>More crayon drawing on a playing card.
>It simply reads 'UR A FAGET'.
>You toss it down and look up.
So, she will be here tonight?
>Before the mayor can speak, you hear familiar laughter.
TRIXIE!
>Trixie appears on the roof in a cloud of smoke and fireworks.
>She has goons with her now.
>Two colts with brown paper bags on their heads with eye holes.
>"It is I!"
>You grit your teeth when Jokermare steps into view beside her.
>This is going to be one intense battle.
>It's a good thing you stopped at Rarity's before this and got her latest CP equipment for you.
>You run at the building.
>Using your new Pone Boots that are magically enchanted, you run straight up the wall of the large building, your arms held out in a v behind you.
>Trixie and Jokermare look surprised by this.
>You smile.
It's Pone time...
 
 
>You jump onto the roof over their heads as they cower.
>God you're almost hard at how cool you must look.
>You land and turn to face them in a Pone Pose.
What are... YOU doing here?
>You pinch the bridge of your nose.
>That line was supposed to be worked on...
>Trixie steps forward, "The Great And Powerful Trixie has come to... SNUGGLE you once and for all!"
>You gasp and step back.
>"And Jokermare is here as we-"
>You all look over to see Jokermare is not there.
>Trixie growls, "whatever! Minions! Snuggle that fool!"
>Her two colt cronies advance toward you.
>You reach into your pocket.
Looks like you young ones could use some... CP in your life!
>You pull out the emergency pocket sand you described to Rarity.
>Thank goodness she included it...
>You throw it into the pony's faces.
Wait a minute, that's not sand...
>The cloud of white powder engulfs the minions and they fall to the ground convulsing.
SALT?!
>A natural hallucinogen and aphrodisiac to ponies.
>The two giggle and flail on the ground, rubbing and kissing eachother.
>Well shit...
>Trixie roars in rage and runs at you.
 
 
>With a magic blast to your chest, you are knocked onto you back.
>Before you can catch your breath, Trixie is on top of you.
>"I have you now Captain Pone! Prepare to get the shit snuggled out of you!"
>You strain to fight her off.
P-pone!
>Suddenly you hear a series of squeaks.
>Trixie stops and looks up.
>"What is that?"
>It sounds like...
Sonar!
Bunny Mare!
>Trixie is tackled off of you in a green blur.
>You jump up and watch as the two struggle on the roof.
What do I do?
>Bunny Mare now sports a green costume that matches yours.
>Trixie pins Bunny Mare and smiles.
No!
>You run toward them, but it's too late.
>Trixie rubs her cheek on your sidekick's.
>Bunny Mare squeals and goes limp under the fiendish snuggling.
You monster! Take this!
>You wind up while running,
PONE PUNCH!
>Your fist connects with Trixie's face and she's sent flying with a 'POW!'
>You drop and cradle Bunny Mare in your arms.
Bunny Mare! You... You saved me...
>She looks up at you with tears in her eyes.
>She's fading.
>You squeeze her tightly.
>"Y-you... You really d-did it Captain... You r-really made the gra*COUGH!*"
>You stroke one of her floppy ears and she gives a sonar squeak and releases some cloaking mist.
>"You're the greatest... Hero... Ever..."
>Her eyes close.
>You sob and look to the sky.
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYY!
 
 
>You stand and look upon Trixie with rage.
>She raises, rubbing her jaw and laughs.
>"Aw, sorry about Baby Mare!"
>You take off your Pone Utility Belt (marvelous bedazzled version) and let it fall beside you.
Trixie... You have poned your last pone...
>You charge at eachother.
>Her horn glows and you feel a magical blast glance off your cheek.
>You yell and kick at her.
PONE KICK!
>It connects with her side.
>She yelps and falls.
HaHA!
>You take a moment to pose.
>She glares up and blasts you in the chest again with her magic.
>You drop to your knees and gasp for breath.
>Still too early for poses...
One last move Trixie...
>You both stand and face eachother.
>"One move will assure Trixie's great victory!"
>You smile and charge.
>She screams her name and gallops at you.
FOOOOR GREEEAAAT JUSSSTICE!
>You dodge her spell and grab her.
>She struggles in fear as you lift her at arms length.
>With a signature sparkling smile you unleash your supreme move.
PONE HEADBUTT-UTT-UTt-utt-utt...
>The words echo as your skull bashes into Trixie's.
>With a sceam she's sent flying off the building.
 
 
>Before she hits the ground, she disappears in a puff of smoke.
>Her last words fill the air.
>"Curse you Captain Pone!"
>You take a second to pose for the cheering onlookers below.
>After a few photo shots, you turn and go to Bunny Mare.
>You lift her and she wakes up with a feeble smile.
>"Y-you did it..."
>You kiss her cheek.
>A massive cloud of her mist fills the air.
>You set her down and the two of you walk to the edge of the building.
>The crowd of ponies below erupt in cheers and chant for you.
>"CP! CP! CP!"
>You look down to Bunny Mare and smile.
>She nods at you and her legs wobble.
>Both of you wave down at the crowd, lit up by the Pone Signal.
>You notice Sweetie Belle on her sister's back below.
>She cheers up to you.
>"YOU'RE THE GREATEST CAPTAIN PONE!"
>You feel a swell in your heart.
Let's go Bunny Mare...
>You fly off on BM, the crowd running along underneath you below.
>The spotlight follows you as you glide through the night air.
>You raise two fingers to the moon and smile.
This is the best night ever...
 
 
>You are Fluttershy.
>It has been a week since Anon defeated Trixie.
>His website on the Ponynet, 'For Great Justice' has recieved over one million upvotes.
>You have never been happier.
>Every night you fight crime with your hero.
>All is as it should be.
>Your only worry is how much time he's been spending with Rainbow Dash...
>Oh well.
>You giggle into the mirror as you get ready.
>Captain Pone was here to stay.
>Even the Mayor approved of him now.
>The town idolized him.
>Especially all the little fillies and colts.
>You had even gotten Angel a CP suit that he played in.
>He was star struck when you brought the Captain over before a mission.
>You finish applying your makeup.
>Sure, Captain Pone was here to stay.
>But...
>He always needed a worthy villain right?
>His happiness was your happiness.
>You laugh at your reflection and lick your lips.
Captain Pone...
Are you ready for our night out?
 
THE END
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5n-_9ZjwRC4&feature=youtube_gdata_player