Title:           Purple is the new Black. Prologue
Author:          Saint_Dane
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/Pq78ehWy
First Edit:      Saturday 1st of February 2014 09:16:04 PM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 1st of February 2014 09:16:04 PM CDT

>Sitting in the "new" church base back in Stilwater, you think long and hard about what has happened before this point.
>You've taken this City-state twice, another once, and became the president of the United States.
>You never fought any aliens while you were president, nor did you have super powers either, because that would be fucking ridiculous.
>Before finishing your term, there was world war three, four, and five all in one sitting.
>Those damn girl scouts thought they could take america at that age? HA! Good thing they surrendered easy, didn't want to nuke the best cookie-makers in the world.
>Alas, all good things have to end, you were voted the most successful leader in the world at that time too.
>People loved you so much, they wanted you to run for a second term, but being the president of a world power was boring.
>You had to drop the dildo bat and pick up a pen, you still stabbed senators, if they insulted you and weren't apart of a large state.
>Wait, isn't California a large state? No, thats the one under Massachusetts and is the smallest state in America.
>You think.
>Ehh, you were loved and that's the only thing that mattered then.
>Now? It's time to be the most wealthiest man in the world.
>How? By robbing the most wealthiest man in the world, William Doors.
>"Hey Boss." you hear Pierce call.
"What is it fegget? Can't you see that I'm having a monologue?"
>"Nigga, fuck evah. Anyways, you got another death-threat from anoth-"You cut him off.
"Nuke-em, thats the only thing we can do about it, now."
>"Uhh, Boss, you aren't the president anymore, you can't do that without starting world war six." he states.
>Well, that fuckin sucks.
"Well, what CAN we do?"
>He looks at you like you're fucking retarded, "Why don't we go to the return address?"
"Where is it?"
>"Next door." he responds.
>Ohh, its that ten-year-olds mother.
>You gave her son an RPG and he accidentally shot down a plane flying over his house.
>Gotta give the kid props, he hit a very small target going pretty fast at the age of Nine.
>Ahh you remember killing your elementary school principal at the age of seven.
>Good times.
>Walking outside you say.
"Ahh, I love the smell of blood and guts on the street in the morning!"
>Pierce looks at you "As do I, Boss, as do I."
>Arriving at the house you kick open the door and shout.
"WAS UP MATHA FACKAS!?"
>You hear bounding down the stairs, the now-eleven-year-old kid.
>"Hey Boss! How you doin?" he asks.
"Pretty good kid, pretty good! how 'bout you?
>"Did my mom send you another letter?" he asks.
"Yeah, she did."
>"How is she sti-" he is cut off by an explosion.
*BOOM*
>The shock carries you off your feet launching you and the others in different directions.
>A hole rips in the middle of the air and sucks you into it, you screaming all the way.
"FUCK YOU PIERCE!"
>After it closes, Pierce stands up, "Aww fuck, why is he the most popular person in existence?" he asks.
>The kid stands up, "Damn nigga, why you so bitchy?" he questions Pierce.