Title:           Thread 10: Stories 121-135
Author:          PrincessApplejack
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/LDj4Kqt8
First Edit:      Wednesday 19th of March 2014 04:38:36 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 19th of March 2014 04:38:36 AM CDT

_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Spike
"DT"
''Filthy Rich"
~~~~
>Mr. Filthy Rich? Uh you're here early.
 
'I needed to meet a business associate of mine and my daughter didn't want to miss out on her first gala. I'm going to be here late so I'm going to need you to take her home when it's over.'
 
>Oh. Well, I kind of had other plans to-
Filthy Rich slaps a wristband on Spike's wrist and it snaps close.
>What the?
 
'It's a tracking device to make sure I know where you are so I know you're taking her home.'
 
>Wait I didn't say I could-
 
'While I would probably be the one to kill you if you left my daughter alone, the reality is that my daughter wil know where you are at all times and SHE will killl you if you leave her alone.'
DT waves.
 
>*GULP*
 
'Have fun kids.'
Walks off
 
"Don't mind him. He's a softy at heart. Let's go get some drinks."
She puls spike along. While she's focused on her goal, Spike puts a helix shell to his ear.
 
>Accelerate the plan. Accelerate the plan.
 
"What was that?"
 
>Nothing!
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
Applejack 2 tugs on Spike's sleeve.
"C'mooooon..."
 
Spike just sighs
"Really, 2? Here, in front of everyone? Shiny will see."
 
"Let 'im! He'd love this too!"
 
"C'mon, 2, you're putting me on the spot..."
 
2 then plays dirty and breaks out her puppy dog eyes and lip quiver wibble
"Please?"
 
"Argh! Okay, okay!, I'll do it!"
 
"Yaaaaaay! Okay! I'll lead!"
 
Spike then takes a paper and hands it to the band on the half destroyed stage, a still bloody and bruised Octavia looks down, looks back to her band and nods as Spike then takes Two's hooves and they begin to slow dance and she sings.
 
"All those days watching from windows,
All those years, outside looking in.
All that time never even knowing
Just how blind I've been"
 
Her voice was too high for this song, but she still was putting her heart and love into it.
 
"Now I'm here, blinking in the starlight,
Now I'm here, suddenly I see,
Standing here, it's all so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be!"
 
Spike shakes a blush from his cheeks listening to this
 
"And at last I see the light!
And it's like the fog has lifted
And at last I see the light
And it's like the sky is new
 
And it's warm, and real, and bright
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once, everything looks different
Now that I see you!"
 
Spike clears his smiles and clears his throat for his part
 
"All those days chasing down a daydream,
All those years living in a blur,
All that time never truly seeing
Things the way they were"
 
Two giggles as she listens to Spike sing
 
"Now she's here, shining in starlight
Now she's here, suddenly I know
If she's here its crystal clear
I'm where I meant to go."
 
Two is now squeeling with delight at the song joined in for the duet
 
"And at last I see the light
And it's like the fog has lifted
And at last I see the light
And its like the sky is new"
 
By now, the entire room had turned their heads to the young pair
 
"And it's warm, and real, and bright
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once, everything looks different
Now that I see you!"
 
The music slows to an end, and the pair embrace, for a moment, only they exist in this world.
 
"Now that I see you."
 
All brought to an end with the thunderous applauds of every one around, immediately silenced by a deadly "SPIKE!..." belonging to the voices of no less than four other mares.
 
Then echoed by the changeling mare in Spike's arms looking suddenly very indignant and expecting an answer.
 
 
NON CANON
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Lord Tourmaline
"A Peasant"
'???'
 
Lord Priceless Tourmaline was not in a happy mood. First his vacation to his ancestral home of Shetland had been effectively cancelled by the announcement of the Grand Galloping Gala in Canterlot, then his wife and daughter had fallen ill, but urged him to represent the family at damnable overgrown garden party, and now here he sat in the shade of a small canyon as his two guards worked to clear a rockslide further up.
 
"Evenin', guv."
 
>Hmm?
 
Tourmaline looked out the window his wagon to find himself staring into the eyes of a filthy looking earth pony in a ratty cloak. The dirt-colored pony smiled with crooked teeth.
 
"Ah said evenin' guv, ya are a guvna, right?"
 
>I am a Lord, thank you very much.
 
"S'what ah said, guvna. Looks like yore here a while, eh?"
 
>Yes, I'm afraid the road to Canterlot from my estate is quite perilous, the price of peace and quiet I suppose.
 
"Say nuh more, say nuh more guvvy my boy, ah have the cure for what ails ya!"
 
>What in Celestia's name are you babbling on about?
 
"There's a secret way, fella me guv, been a secret o'me family for generations! You'n yore guards can slip right on through and be down t'where ya goin' in no time!"
 
>I see...
 
Tourmaline blinked, the peasant was uncouth, unhygienic, and by all evidence unintelligent. But there was something oddly...enthralling about his proposition as he continued to stare into the Lord's eyes.
 
>Fine, yes, show me.
 
Tourmaline stepped out of his carriage, following behind as the peasant slipped through a patch of tall grass into a dark stone passage way, illuminated by shafts of sunlight poking through cracks in the roof.
 
"Right this way, guv, Ah'll have ya out of this of pickle in a jiff!"
 
Tourmaline smiled the more his new friend talked. What a personable fellow, despite his shabby appearance, what a great Equestrian hero helping him escape his predicament, stuck with his carriage and guards and-wait...
 
>My friend?
 
"Yes, guv?"
 
>How will I fit my carriage in here?
 
The peasant turned, and so did Tourmaline's stomach, as the pony's features melted away, revealing an insectoid face with a chipped fang and a maddened look in its eyes.
 
"Oh you won't 'Guv', now hold still please."
 
Tourmaline opened his mouth to shout, but he was tackled down by figures, their skin milky white and cold to the touch. Tourmaline struggled but it was to little avail.
 
"Remove his clothes, give them to me."
 
Tourmaline grunted as his jewelry and garments were removed, having little say in the matter as the creature shrugged off its cloak and pulled on Tourmaline's clothing.
 
"Good, tie him up. Rukulk, you will watch him, if he tries to escape, kill him, but only then. I will know if you're lying."
 
'Ysss, Zhetri Tuuhl...'
 
"You're lucky I don't have the time to correct you."
 
>Who...are you?
 
The creature smirked as he examined Tourmaline's gala ticket, then looked back at the aristocrat.
 
"Well my friend, for the purposes of tonight..."
 
In an instant the creature morphed just as quickly as it had dropped its first disguise and it was as if Tourmaline was looking into a mirror.
 
"I am you. Reyuk, Grehm, follow the trail of my new carriage once night falls. Stay out of sight, I have a party to attend."
 
'Yes, Chieftain.'
 
With a smirk, this imposter, this Zhetri Tuuhl trotted away, to slip back into Tourmaline's carriage, to ride to the Gala, and to mingle amongst the royals and uppercrust of Equestria. Tourmaline could only watch, watch and pray for the safety of Equestria.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Pinkie
"Guard 1"
'Guard 2'
-Cheese-
[Flim]
<Flam>
 
>Cheese! Cheeeeeese! Cheese Sandwiiiiich! Where in Equestria IS that pony?
 
"Can we help you, Ms. Pie?"
 
>Yeah, can you help me find Cheese, please? The Grand Galloping Gala's tonight and I need a date, and-
 
'Since you're both super party ponies you want to go with him?'
 
>Exactly!
 
"Super party pony, what is that and how do you know what that is?"
 
'That song had like fifty reprises, I know how to fill out the application form at this point.'
 
>Guys, can we focus? Have you seen him?
 
"Not recently."
 
'We haven't seen him since we...locked him in with...'
 
"Flim and...Flam..."
 
'Oh...'
 
"...SHIT!"
 
>And cue time skip, anon!
 
Thirty Minutes Later!
 
>Thirty? Jeez, kinda stretching it, aren't you?
 
"We ran here as fast as we can!"
 
>Wasn't talking to you.
 
"But-"
 
'Just ignore her, help me find the right key! Pleasedon'tbedeadpleasedon'tbedeeead!'
 
Click.
 
The corridor became a flood of confetti, sparkles, and noise makers, Cheese Sandwich surfed it all out with a pair of googly-eye glasses on his face and four different kinds of novelty feet on his hooves.
 
"'GAH!'"
 
>Hi Cheese!
 
-Hi Pinkie, Guard 1, Guard 2! Three o'clock already?-
 
>Something like that, would you go to the Gala with me?
 
-Would I! Sure, I'll go put on my good polka dot suit!-
 
>Great!
 
The two earth ponies bound away leaving the two guards to peer into the dungeon, where the Flim Flam Bros. are huddled together in a corner, surrounded by half-eaten cake slices and streamers.
 
[At last, salvation!]
 
<I'll never eat cake again!>
 
[That pony was no pony, but an unholy demon!]
 
<Hippos everywhere!>
 
[But now we're free! Quick, let us out of here!]
 
"..."
 
'...'
 
Creeeeeak...SLAM!
 
[<NO WAIT COME BACK!>]
 
"Sooooo..."
 
'Pony Joe's?'
 
"Oh yeah."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>SA
"Cadence"
'Chrysalis'
~~~~~
 
"If you brace yourself, it'll only make it worse."
 
>Don't tell me how to react. She walked in the other day with a bunch of lace and a thong. I can be as apprehensive as I want, thank you.
 
"She was just doing that to rile you up."
 
>She does everything to rile me up. I swear, if I ever actually DID sleep with her she wouldn't know what to do the next day, she'd lay in bed going 'shit, what now?' until we dragged her out-
 
The doors opened abruptly, as expected. But it was not with an playful slamming, an energetic push, or even a simply careless swing. It was slow, and deliberate, allowing them to get a full view of the Changeling Queen on the other side of the door at their own pace. Strangely enough, she wasn't even smiling.
 
>...Wow.
 
"Okay, uh... that looks good. Really good. Really, really good. Beautiful even."
 
'Yeah, had to get it commissioned. Couldn't do this and sunasses dress as the same time.'
 
>Well, it looks nice, regal like a Queen.
 
'Thanks.'
 
"Why so grumpy?"
 
'Ahhh, I was going to wear my other dress, the one I showed you the day before yesterday, Shiny. But I lost one of the boots.'
 
>...Thank Celestia.
 
'Pfft, no taste.'
 
A white rose floated up, and slipped into her hair.
 
>Come on, don't want to keep them waiting, right?
 
A hoof rose up, gently touching the flower. For the first time since the conversation started, the Queen smiled.
 
'...Oh hell yes, let's go reign some chaos, shall we? HAH! These ponies think they know how to party? They don't fucking KNOW parties!'
 
She left with a regal trot, ignoring the deep sigh Shining Armor let out in her wake.
 
"Well, you tried."
 
>Who knows, maybe she'll behave.
 
"..."
>....
 
>"...*Sigh*..."
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>SA
"Chrysalis"
~~~~
 
>...
 
"What, you don't like it?"
 
>Is this your way of saying 'I'm done trying to seduce you, and will be hooking at the party'?
 
"Oh, ha, ha."
 
>Just saying, Poindexter offered me strippers for my pre-bachalor party, and I know for a fact one of them was wearing that.
 
"So then, you like this? Stripper wise, I mean."
 
>You look me in the eye and tell me you could get that off in the next five minutes if I wanted you to.
 
"I c-"
 
>WITHOUT ripping it.
 
"...Hrm..."
 
>Yeah, that strippers gimmick? She would take all night to get unwrapped... and then give you a free lap dance.
 
"Oh, you wanted a lap dance? Why didn't you say so?"
 
>Just please... don't wear that to the Gala.
 
"I heard 'wear this to the Gala, I want you to. If I didn't want you to, I will tell you via interpretive dance using sex as the medium.' So cultured, you are!"
 
>...Ugh.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
"Guard 1"
'Guard 2'
~Donut Joe~
-----
 
"Joe, we need coffee! Strong as you got!"
 
'And loadsa donuts, stat!'
 
~'Ey fellas, youse sure picked da right day for it! Siddown, I'mma get youse a party platter.~
 
"I c-can't stop shivering ..."
 
'There was like ... a whole boneless zoo in there!'
 
"And the eyes- THE GOOGLY EYES, DUDE!"
 
~Here youse goeses! Dis week's special, in honor of da Gala - sparkly frosted donuts with confetti sprinkles! Youse like? Eh?~
 
*beat*
 
"'BLAAAAARGH'"
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>42
"18"
~~~~
 
>...Yes, I would love to dance. Yes, I would love to have a dance with you. Yes, I would love to-
 
"Ride you like the magnificent stallion you are ALL NIGHT LOOOONG!"
 
>GAAAAAH!....FUCK YOU 18!
 
"Hah! You make it too easy. You get so flustered when I bring up Shiny."
 
>You never know, I could have been thinking of 77! He is my date, you know.
 
"..."
 
>...FUCK YOU 18!
 
"Ahhh, no need to be mad! Happy dancy fun time! It's every Changeling's dream."
 
>What? No it isn't! None of us have ever dreamed about going to a dance, we didn't even have a CONCEPT of a night dedicated to dancing! Why would we? Our whole lives are "do this for the Queen" or "do that for the Queen" or "die for the Queen because it's tuesday and tuesday is die for the Queen night"! Stop making stuff up!
 
"Hrm, guess you're right. Thought, it's not really much about what the Queen wants tonight, is it? She didn't order us to go."
 
>She didn't say not to.
 
"All the same, we both know we're going here for two reasons. A, a lot of our new friends are there and we want to have a fun time, and B..."
 
>...
 
"We want Shiny to think to himself, hey, maybe we can add another... 'celebrity exception'."
 
>...It's not always about sex, you know.
 
"Got me there! Have fun tonight, 42. I mean it. You've fought so hard and so long, you deserve at least one night where it's all about fun. If your date starts boring you, come find me, we'll show them how Changelings can party."
 
>...Thanks, 18.
 
"Anytime. Though, I would be careful around 77."
 
>Oh? Why?
 
"Why? Come on, 42, he's a total pervert. Has a boner he whips out in public all the time!"
 
>....OUT!
 
"PFFFTHAHAHAHA!"
 
>OUT OUT OUT OUT !
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Octavia
"Vinyl Scratch"
'Celestia'
~~~~~
"This stage isn't big enough for the both of us... Well, my and my DJ table AND you and your orchastra. I mean if it was just you and me it would be fine."
 
>And it took us hours to set up, so maybe you should have been here sooner.
 
"I'll set you up in hours!"
 
>RELEASING THE SEVENTH PHONON!
 
"Two can play at this game: Oh, admonishing melody, arise in the name of the Good Vibrations!"
 
Music and fistfight!
 
'Yeeessssss.... Dance puppets, dance!'
 
Later, with moments before the gala's formal beginning
 
>Okay... We've only got moments to spare and we're BOTH on first. We have got to find some compromise
 
"Well... Can you guys do Insane in the Brain?"
 
>We mostly do classical but...
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=ghP_bXBM2Ec#t=4
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>AJ10
"Guard"
{BBB}
~~~~
 
>Hiya!
 
"...How in the fuck did you get past all the other reporters and photographers? I just... there are so many who should have stomped you dead, but here you are, prime spot to see everyone who comes along and talk to them, completely unmolested."
 
>Yeah! Really nice of them. I think they're nicer than you guys give 'em credit for, think a few bad eggs make ya' think all reporters are mean. They're not, really!
 
"...is that..."
 
>Hm? OH! He's my camera guy. He holds the camera. Cool, huh?
 
{BZZT! PLEASE GIVE ADEQUATE ROOM FOR MY LIGHTING!}
 
>He takes pride in his work. Standup robot, that guy.
 
"Are those buzz saws?"
 
>They're not on!
 
"..."
 
>...Mostly. He spins them sometimes.
 
{I HAVE TO ENSURE THEY ARE CAPABLE SHOULD I NEED TO CUT AN OBJECT!}
 
>See? Reason for everything.
 
"...Just don't kill anyone."
 
>Hey, I took out every one of his bullets this time, I TRIPLE checked!
 
"Did you disarm that laser?"
 
>...I dunno how ta' do that, actually.
 
"..."
 
>...I'll make sure he doesn't kill nobody.
 
{BZZT! ERROR! THE LIGHTING IS SO BEAUTIFUL, MY ROBOTIC SENSES CANNOT HANDLE IT!}
 
>Awww, I like the night too!
 
{EXTERMINATE!}
 
>BBB NO!
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Spike/Rainbolt Blue
"Potatojack"
'Celestia'
-Applejack-
~~~~
 
'Spike? What are you doing here?'
 
>Oh uh j-just bringing in my date. I said I'd pick her up.
 
"Mrghng erephia"
 
-What happened to Diamond Tiara? Ah thought she was your date?-
 
"Mrrgh erri aring uhmph?"
 
>Uh no no! I'm clearly here with her.
 
"Urgh mmng mmur muhaoghs?"
 
-Yeah, there's more 'taters inside but-
Spike gets swiftly dragged inside.
 
>Waaa!
 
'...well that was a bit strange.'
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Celestia
"Applejack"
'???'
[???]
-???-
{???}
~???~
~~~~
 
>...Are you going to explain the itching powder before or after you use it on whatever poor soul has earned your ire.
 
"Ain't nothin' you need ta' concern yer'self with, just a little payback fer' someone steppin' over a line they shouldn'a."
 
>Really, Applejack, it doesn't even look like the Mayor is all that interested in him.
 
"That don't mean... what did ya' say?"
 
>Mayor Mare, over there with your brother. Isn't that why you're so irritated?
 
"Huh... if she's with Big Mac, Ah' wonder who-"
 
'Applejack!'
 
"...Over the line, ya' friggen bug monster."
 
'What was that?'
 
"Ah' said, hey Cheerilee! What a surprise ta' see ya' here!"
 
'Oh I know! I never thought I would ever get to go to this! Oh, it's so wonderful, I can't even describe it.'
 
"29?"
 
'Oh, yes! How did you know?'
 
"Oh, just a hunch. Hey, where's yer' date? Ah' had somethin' Ah' needed ta' show him."
 
'...Date? Oh no, I came here alone. I'm actually trying to find a certain someone!...Oh! You mean 29? He's not here.'
 
"Where is he?"
 
'...Back at Ponyville, I assume. He said you only gave him two tickets.'
 
"...O-oh, right... uh, plum forgot. You go have yer'self a fun night, Cheers."
 
'I will! Thank you again, Applejack, you don't know what this means to me.'
 
"...Wow."
 
>Well, that's the face of 'I just stepped on my grandmothers crutch' if I ever saw one.
 
"Ah' feel like a jerk now."
 
>As well you should, not that I have even the slightest idea what is going on.
 
"Hrm, guess ya' think ya' know a guy... Ah' wonder what he's doin' back at Ponyville?"
 
>Having his own fun, I assume.
 
~~~~~~~
 
[YOU LITTLE BRATS! UNTIE ME! WHERE ARE YOUR GUARDIANS!? LIKE FIRE FROM THE SKY I WILL REND YOU ALL ASUNDER!]
 
-Cutie Mark Crusader hogtiers, GO!-
 
{I am so, so sorry for this.}
 
~We tried to stop them, really. Just be thankful they decided against-~
 
-CUTIE MARK CRUSADER DOCTORS!-
 
[...]
~...~
{...So, so sorry.}
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Celestia
"Applejack"
~~~~~
 
>You can just ask, you know.
 
"Fine, where tha' heck did ya'll get a dress that actually fit yer' ass?"
 
>...I owe Chrysalis a favor now.
 
"You poor, poor, foolish mare. what were ya' thinkin'?"
 
>That I wanted to wear a pretty dress, and apparently MAKING HER AN ALICORN still somehow is not enough to bump me up just a bit higher on the list.
 
"..."
 
>Just so you know, in this little contest you are having with her? I'm rooting for you, now. I never thought the day would come that I would pick the one who constantly tears my work apart in a favoritism contest, but here we are. In your pursuits, I wish you the best, and will likely begin spitting in Rarities coffee shortly. In exchange for my further assistance on the matter, keep quiet on that little note, if you would please.
 
"...So, what's the favor-"
 
>Do not ask.
 
"..."
 
>Don't. Ask.
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Spike/Rainbolt Red
"Celestia"
'Applejack'
-Shining-
~Cadence~
{AJ2}
~~~~
 
-Hey Celestia. Hey Applejack. Great to see you two. Have you seen Spike? He's suppose to be with 2 here.-
 
"I just saw him earlier with-"
 
>Shining! You made it!
 
"Good to see you little buddy. Show her a good time."
 
{Whoohoo!}
 
'Aren't you with-'
 
>AJ2? Yes most definitely! Let's go 2.
 
~Aren't they just precious? We'll meet you inside once you're done greeting. Let's go Shiny.~
 
"'...'"
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________
 
>Guard 1
"Guard 2"
~~~~
 
>I'm telling you, that dragon is a straight, up, PIMP! Seen him with three different girls already.
 
"They all look underage."
 
>Isn't he underage?
 
"Just saying, I doubt heavily he is sleeping with any of them."
 
>What makes you say that?
 
"One of them is Shining Armor's adopted daughter."
 
>...Oh shit, that actually happened? I thought that was a rumor. He actually adopted one?
 
"That he did. She's cute enough to send you into cardiac arrest, too."
 
>...Is she, you know... his?
 
"Nope."
 
>Wow. Mind, blown. From that guy, of everyone? Fuck, I'd never want a Changeling to be on the same continent as me after what they put him through.
 
"Don't ask me, just telling it like it is."
 
>So, if the dragon isn't a P I M P, my friend, what is he?
 
"Pimp in training."
 
>Oh?
 
"Yep, and by the way..."
 
Right on cue, as if summoned by the sheer laws of comedic probability, Shining Armor arrived on the scene. To his left, his gorgeous and stunningly dressed wife. To his right, the statuesque and regal Queen of the Changelings. Neither of them could take their eyes off him, nor could the soldier Changeling standing not too far behind, or the one with the mane eerily reminiscent of Cadence's own not a few steps beyond that. And that's not even mentioning the standard type who snap to attention whenever royalty is in the room. The prospect of the Prince entertaining a harem was enticing, it seemed.
 
"...I'd say his big brother is teaching him well."
 
>Damn... want to place bets on who this is going to end worse for?
 
"No contest, the dragon is doomed."
 
>Heartily disagree.
 
"Loser guards midnight shift for a month?"
 
>You're on!
_______________________________________________________________________________________________________________