Title:           Sun Wooing
Author:          LaPsbin
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/3LJWTUiH
First Edit:      Saturday 22nd of August 2015 11:53:10 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Saturday 22nd of August 2015 11:53:10 AM CDT

BE PRINCESS CELESTIA
>"Are you sure something like this is... necessary, your Highness?"
>You find yourself striding down one of the hallways of your castle with your assistant Raven
>While you would have liked to say that it was a normal day for you that'd be a lie
>Your usual motherly smile was gone
>You had forgone your royal garb
>The usual calm and thoughtfulness that was usually associated with your person was nonexistent
>Because today was an important day
>One of the most important days that you've had in a long time
>And, for a mare that's fought everything from eldritch horrors to the mightiest of dragons, you were a little bit... nervous
>Which, to be honest, wasn't something that you usually felt
>Like at all
>You had been calm when your sister had returned
>You had been collected when Discord decided to rear his ugly head
>Heck, you had even been semi-ready for Triek when he marched on Canterlot
>But now you had to resist the urge to run back to your room and hide under a blanket
>Because right now you weren't facing a normal enemy
>This foe was one that you could not seal away or send to the moon or send your student to fight
>No
>You, Celestia Solaire Invictus, Lady of the Sun and the mother of one of the most powerful nations that has ever existed, were about to match wits with a colt
>A colt that you really liked
>A colt that liked to be around you, Celestia, not "Princess Celestia"
>And who you didn't have to look down at to talk to
>And whose smile made your heart flutter and--
>Urgh!
>Focus Celestia!
>You can't let this stallion get into your bucking head before you've even seen him!
>You snort and give your head a shake to get some alpha flowing
>YEAH!
>ALPHA AS FUARRRRRK!
"I assure you that this is ABSOLUTELY necessary, Raven," you tell the little mare beside you
>"But Highness doesn't this seem a little ... excessive for some colt?"
>Though your first instinct say that Anon wasn't just SOME COLT and chew your assistant out you restrained yourself
>Raven was one of your closest companions and it WAS her job to make you think carefully of what you were doing was good for your image and for your little ponies as a whole
>But this was different
>This wasn't some silly manner of state
>This was a manner of love
>And that shit was totes important yo!
"He's not a colt, Raven."
>"You know what I mean your Majesty."
>You can't help but crack a small smile
"I know, my little pony, but trust me when I say that everything I have done was necessary to woo "some colt" as you so elegantly put it. He is important to me and I want to make sure that this is as perfect as can be."
>To be fair you might have gone a little overboard with this
>A Princess such as yourself shouldn't be following a stallion around like a lost puppy
>But it wasn't your fault!
>This colt, this hyemon just had... something
>Something that drew you in!
>You had just thought him another stallion when your student had brought him up to Canterlot
>Cute and a bit exotic sure, but nothing that you hadn't seen
>You had questioned him, found out that his name was Anonymous and he was a "huemon"
>And, after speaking to him at great length, you had offered him a room at the castle (as any mare would do)
>It was when you had invited him to your room for a cup of tea that you found out Anon wasn't like any stallion that you'd seen in a LONG time
>The hyemon was excellent company
>Someone that wasn't intimidated at all of your rank and size and stature
>And you enjoyed that about him, so much so that you invited him to another tea time
>Just like last time you had a wonderful time speaking to him
>So after that you started to speak to him on a daily basis
>The two of you became fast friends after a month or two
>And a few months after that you could safely consider Anonymous as one of your closest companions
>Then you started getting this funny, colty feeling whenever he was about
>Which then got worse and worse until you couldn't think about anything other than him and how nice it felt when he hugged you and how lonely your bed felt at night
>You hadn't know until to was too late but this odd stallion, this creature from another world, had stolen your heart
>Stolen it with such efficiency and precision that your heart pounded and your knees went weak whenever you were around him
>But now it was your turn!
>YOU were going to take HIS heart and win him over and call him yours!
>...Hopefully...
>It had been a long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, LONG time since you had taken a mate
>So long that you couldn't remember your last coltfriends face
>Sure, you'd had your share of tail over the years but that was just sex
>Dirty, dirty sex...
>But sometimes you wanted something more meaningful than riding some walking cock!
>You wanted some walking cock to care about you and you wanted to care about him
>Emotionally and shit
>Which meant that you might have been a little bit... RUSTY with wooing
>But say what you will you had always been a grade A planner!
>Somepony that could get anything she wanted with enough patience and elbow grease!
>So you had planned on the best course of action into winning Anonymous
>Then you had put your plan, the bit of genius it was, and into action
>The first thing you did was make sure to quietly tell every single mare in Canterlot, in no uncertain terms, that any attempts to woo, seduce, or sexually harass Anon would NOT go very well for them
>He was your human!
>No bucking touchy!
>Then you had gotten out the oldest books on courting that you could find and began reading like there was no tomorrow
>You weren't going to need all of the new fangled poppycock that the kids used today!
>The old way would win Anon's heart over!
>It worked back then and I'd work now!
>Maybe!
>Probably!
>Hopefully!
>...Wooing couldn't have changed that much right?
>Nah
>You bet that it didn't change at all!
>After your books were read you had decided to mold yourself into the marelest mare that has ever and will ever exist
>You had let your chest tuft grow free and wild
>You starting hitting the gym with a vengeance
>And you had doubled up on your vanilla shampoo ('cause colts LOVEd vanilla)
>It had taken months of preparation but you finally felt ready
>The castle was empty, you had worked your horn to the nub making a beautiful sunset, and Anon was out in your garden doing silly colt things
>Today was the day that you were going to woo yourself a hyemon!
"Remember to have that bottle of 407 Frankenswine Delore in my room within the hour, Raven," you tell your secretary. "Make sure it's chilled but not too chilled, I don't want Anon getting a headache while drinking it."
>Raven nods, though you can still see that she clearly did understand why you were doing this
>She would when she fell in love with some colt herself you wager
>Then you'd tease her and do your best to help her out to win the colt of HER dreams
>'Cause mares had to stick together yo!
>"Would you like it if I brought you something to nibble on also?" Raven asked as you looked down at the mighty jungle that was your chest tuft
"That would be wonderful, thank you," you say as you use your magic to puff out your chest hair even more
>Raven rolls her eyes but you just puff your chest out proudly
>Your tuft game was top bucking notch!
>The second that Anon was it he drop those pants of his faster than you could say cake!
>...Hopefully
>...YOU thought it looked good...
>It took a few minutes but soon both you and Raven find yourselfs at the entrance of the garden
>"I'll make sure that everything's ready for you, Highness," she says, patting wither before adjusting her glasses
>You nod
"I appreciate your help, Raven," you say with a smile. "I wouldn't be standing here if it weren't for you."
>Raven answers you with a smile of her own
>"It was my honor, Princess," she tells you before pointing out the door. "Now go and get your colt while I make sure everything you asked for is ready."
>You take a step forward and take a deep breath as Raven leaves you
>Alright Celestia
>It was do or die time
>You had to be commanding and firm but understanding and gentle
>You had give off an area of attraction and mareliness but not so much that you scared Anon off
>You needed to be in the zone
>So take another deep breath...
>...
>...
>...
>You now are lighter than a slice of bread
>An alpha slice of bread
>That could woo any colt it wanted without batting an eyelash
>COME ON!
>YOU BUCKING GOT THIS!
>YOU
>GOT
>THIS!
>FUAAARRRRRKKKKINNNNNGGGGGG ALLLLPPPPPHHHHHHHAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!
 
BE ANON
>It's another day at the lovely Canterlot castle
>You, being the lazy asshole that you were, were lounging under your favorite oak tree in the gardens while you did your best to whittle a lion out of a chunk of wood
>You had already managed to make a wolf (or wolfish thing) and a deer (or at least something that looked like a deer in the right light) and you wanted to get every houses animal from Game of Thrones
>Since you were a fucking dork and you had nothing better to do in horseland
>...
>...
>...
>You should probably look for a job or something
>You lazy putz...
>"Oh, there you are Anon! I was looking everywhere for you!"
>You look up from your "masterpiece" to see a grinning sun horse
>A naked grinning sun horse
>how was naked for... some reason
"Heya Celly," you greet, folding up the pocket knife you had been using and leaning forward. "How are ya doing?"
>Her smile widens
>"Oh I'm doing very well, thank you for asking."
>You nod and wait for her to say something else
>She said she had been looking for you, so she must have something important to tell you
>So you just leaned back against the old oak tree and wait for her to spill the beans
>And waited
>And waited
>ANNNNDDDD WAAAIIITTTTEEEDDDD
"...Did you need something Celestia or..."
>The Princess blinks in surprise before nodding
>"Oh! Yes! I have something I wanted to show you!"
>You see her fidget slightly, looking around nervously
>"Something... important...
 
BE CELESTIA AGAIN
>ALRIGHT!
>You had Anon right where you wanted him!
>All cute and innocent sitting against a tree!
>So now it was time to show him that you wanted to be together and maybe see a movie sometime maybe when he wasn't busy or anything because youlikedhimandwantedtostartseeingeachother!
>And to do that you had to unleash your secret weapon
>A colt magnet
>Something that would really SHOW him your interest
>You had to show him one of the most potent dances of love conceived by ponykind
>The Amore de Fantasia
>Anon didn't know what was coming
>You can't help but grin impishly
>Heh
>Coming...
 
BE ANON ONCE MORE
>You watch as Sun hoers stretches, readying herself for... whatever she was gonna show you
>You would have asked what exactly she was showing you but she looked as serious as all hell right now so you decided to shut your mouth and see what happened
>Thiswasgonnabegood.jnp
>After a minute of stretching and Celestia stands back up to her full height, looking down at you with a look of utter focus and concentration
>"Alright, are you ready Anon?"
>It'shappening.gpj
"Whenever you're ready, Celestia," you say, gesturing for her to start
>"Okay... here I go!"
>Celestia takes a deep breath before sitting on her rump
>A whicker escaped her throat as she spread her wings and give them a little flap
>...
>...
>...
>What the hell was goin--
>Ohshitshe'sstartingagain!
>The Princess hops back to her hooves and begins... prancing around in circles, tossing her head back and forth and keeping her chest puffed out as much as possible
>...Aw
>What is this silly horse doing?
>Celestia let out a loud neigh before giving her wings another flap and rolling onto her back
>You can't help but smile as she starts kicking her hooves sporadically
>With an utter look of concentration she rolls onto her belly and lets out a horsey snort before looking over at you and bobbing her head
>Trying not to laugh you bob your head right back
>You might not have known what the heck was going on but this was the cutest thing that you've ever seen Sun horse do
>Hell, this might have been the cutest thing you've seen ANY pony do
>Grade A Hnnngg material this
>Seeing your head bob Celestia whickers again, her ears moving to and fro, before rolling around on the ground for a bit
>Putting your little wooden lion down and rising to your feet you make your way over toward the silly little horse before you
>You couldn't just sit there and watch this silliness unfold before you!
>You had to join on in!
>Celestia let out a surprised squeak as you sit down, wrap your arms around her neck, and roll around with her
>If Sunny Buns wanted to be a silly hoers and play around you were happy to oblige
>It was a hell of a lot better than sitting around whittling a shitty lion that much was for sure
>Celestia let out another neigh and snorts into your face as you laugh, rolling the two of you around until you both were panting and sweaty and you were laughing so hard that you chest hurt
>Eventually, after five minutes or so, you stop playing around with the silliest horse in poneland, simply laying there scratching Celestia's ear as she nuzzled your chest
>Heh
>Silly sun Hoers
 
BE CELESTIA ONE LAST TIME
>Ohmygosh!
>It actually worked!
>You had barely started your wooing dance and Anon couldn't keep his hands off of you!
>It was kinda of a shame that you didn't get to finish the dance since you had spend days perfecting it but buck it!
>Anon liked you!
>Liked-liked if him rolling around holding onto you meant anything!
>*HappyHorsenoises*
>This was perfect!
>You couldn't have planned for this to turn out anymore perfect!
>You had the colt of your dreams cradling your head as you laid atop him, rubbing yourself all over him to get your stank on him and claim him as your own
>You could REALLY claim him as your own after the two of you got up and you carried him to your bedroom and whispered sweet nothings into his ear
>But for now this was enough
>Sitting here under your sun nuzzling his chest while he pet you and called you a silly horse
>With a happy sigh you close your eyes, reaching up with a wing and tickling your human's nose
"Yep... still got it"
