Title:           Option 2: Lyra Sauce by Lyrafag
Author:          FrankHogs555
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/1GBBAYjd
First Edit:      Wednesday 22nd of January 2014 05:36:59 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Wednesday 22nd of January 2014 05:36:59 AM CDT

Neater version here: http://pastebin.com/aZ8EDuTh
 
 
Anonymous 01/21/14(Tue)19:47 UTC-5 No.15821942
 
    >this fucking thread
 
    Never been a writefag here before, but I might as well give it a shot.
 
    >"Option 2, huh?"
    >The figure opposite you sits with an eyebrow raised, clad in a dark brown trenchcoat and typical fedora.
    >He smirks, spreading his palms on the table.
    >"On the one hand, you've got your little waifu here with you! She'll love you, she'll be your best friend."
    >"On the other, she'll be alone in this giant world with none of her own kind to interact with. You'll be all she has, and if that changes? She's gone forever."
    >You roll your eyes, already tired of his euphoric bullshit.
    "Yeah yeah, cliche movie quotes about not understanding the repercussions of my actions, the same old bull. Just hurry it up so I can tell everyone one the board that this was a huge sca--"
    >The anon cuts you off with a snap of his fingers.
    >"Yep, it's a scam. Just like how the cartoon horse inside your front door is a scam."
    >You think for a second, scoffing.
    "Neither of those are as big of a scam as your purchase of that shitty headwear."
    >Your three hundred and fifty-plus pound conversational partner's forehead begins glistening with sweat as he stutters out a reply.
    >"Y-yeah, well, you b-better hurry up and get home before she wakes up, or you'll be the scam!"
    >Neither of you move as you both attempt to turn his words into a coherent form, but before you can mock him again he jiggles from his chair and wobbles out the door.
    >As he leaves, you can't help but notice a few stray noodles that follow behind him as well as the faint scent of pasta sauce.
    >You can't help but laugh at his autism as you get up and follow him out, leaving a crummy diner to head back to your slightly less crummy abode.
 
    Assuming anyone gives a shit, which pone do you find?
 
>>15823281 # I couldn't have held it in anyway.
 
>>15823066 #
>You stare back, all thoughts completely stricken from your mind.
"Wha... What?"
>She continues staring at you, visibly shaking with more intensity than she was when you first laid eyes on her.
>She waits, then asks again:
>"What...?"
"What?"
>Her shaking has diminished ever so slightly by this point, and her expression softens a minuscule amount.
>"What?"
>Shit
>Fuck
>Titty
>Ass
>Bitch
"Um... D-do you have a map? Because I just got l-lost i y-your eyes..."
>She tilts her head, the shuddering reduced to the lowest it's yet been.
>"...what."
>It's more of a statement this time, rather than a question.
"I... Do you want some spaghetti?"
>Never in your life have you felt this idiotic. You clutch your fists at your sides, shutting your eyes and mentally slapping yourself.
>Your pockets already feel heavy with the heat of the sauce on your person, but you begin the struggle of fighting the urge as well as you can.
 
Pretty fucking smooth, /mlp/. Wat do?
 
lyrafag 01/21/14(Tue)22:19 UTC-5 No.15825645
Replies: >>15826684 >>15827844
 
    >>15823797 # Spaghetti it is!
 
    >>15825043 #
    "I... I mean, I... Yeah, yeah, let me make you some... Some spaghetti..."
    >She shakes her head, her eyes slipping from your visage just for a moment to contemplate your massive fuckupery.
    >It only takes a second for her to realize that she's not watching who could be her potential kidnapper, though, and she snaps back to attention.
    >"What... Just... I don't know, I... What?"
    >It's kind of funny-- the way she's staring at you, both mortified by her placement here and amused at your innocent social autism, is almost cute.
    >Well, the amusement part, at least.
    >You walk off into the kitchen, keeping your gaze focused on the still darkened room a few feet away.
    >One of the lights in the fixture above appears to be out as you enter the room, reaching into your back pocket for the spaghetti noodles you're certain are there.
    >To your surprise, there's nothing but a wallet and some lint; it would appear as though the concept of spaghetti falling from one's pockets is nothing more than an Internet-based concept that has no basis in reality.
    "Well, I'll be a sonofabitch. I thought everything I read on the Internet was true, especially on 4chan. Go figure!"
    >You shrug and turn the knob on your stovetop, filling a pot with water and setting it to boil.
    "Oh, wait. I've kind got a fucking cartoon horse that doesn't even exist flipping her shit in my hallway. I should probably fix that..."
    >You drop some noodles into the pot, very concerned with making this spaghetti for some reason, and shuffle back into the den (still avoiding Lyra's gaze).
 
    Spaghetti is cooking. Wat do?
 
>>15826684 # Thanks for keeping me moving, anon.
 
>>15825645 #
>A few more seconds of awkward silence pass as your autism begins to recede.
>The bright blue mare remains with her back to the wall, her eyes following every twitch of your hand or blink of your eye.
>You continue to stare in bewilderment as a plan of action begins forming in your mind.
>Leaning your back on the door, you slowly slide down the wall to sit on the floor.
"Um, well... Hello, ah, L--"
>You stop halfway through the sentence, remembering the bit about how she doesn't know how she arrived.
"L... L... Llllllittle one!"
>Nice save, faggot.
>Ms. Heartstrings' expression of suspicion and wariness match your feelings of unintelligence pretty well.
>She doesn't respond, though you notice that the trembling has stopped.
"Well, I'm sorry, I don't mean to insult you or anything, I just... This is insane."
>Goddammit, anon, you're a fucking spazz.
>Get it together, get it together...
systemreboot.exe
>You take a deep breath and, focusing your gaze on Lyra's face, begin speaking with renewed conviction.
"Okay, I'm sorry. I don't know what's going on here. My name is Anonymous, and I'm on the verge of freaking out here. I don't know who you are--"
>A lie.
"--or how you got here--"
>A somewhat-truth, as you don't know how that faggot from 4chan managed to bring a cartoon horse into your house.
"--but I don't want any trouble. I don't want to hurt you, I'd really prefer that you didn't hurt me, and I've got absolutely no idea how to proceed from here."
>Moments pass, turning from seconds into minutes as the equine female examines you.
>She takes a deep breath of her own after what feels like an eternity and opens her lips to speak:
"Oh, shit, the spaghetti! Hold that thought..."
>The sound of boiling water brings you to the kitchen once again, where you make the fastest bowl of spaghetti sauce of your life.
 
>>15827844 #
>In "making a bowl of spaghetti sauce", of course, you really dump a half of a jar of Prego into a bowl and microwave it for six minutes.
>Satisfied with your "work", you return to the hallway to find Lyra sitting back against the wall in a way almost identical to how you had been not two minutes before.
"Pfffftch..."
>She jumps up immediately, startled as she registers your presence by the sound of your laughter.
>You stop immediately, putting your hands up palms-forward and stepping backwards slowly.
>The pone slinks against the wall again, her gaze now more inquisitive than anything.
>She seems to be staring at your hands, actually...
"Oh, yeah, these," you say as you waggle your fingers, "look pretty different than your hooves. I guess you're curious as to what I am, right?"
>She hesitates, then responds:
>"Yes, for starters."
>Her voice is a bit higher and more melodic than you'd imagined.
"I'm a human. There's a lot of us, really, something like seven billion on Earth..."
>"Earth? I'm still on Earth, then?"
>You think a moment, trying to recall details of the show; you vaguely remember Twilight saying "What on Earth are you doing?" at some point.
"If that's where you're from, I guess you never left."
>With her expression still a mix of fear and befuddlement, Lyra looks down at her hooves in thought.
>"But... None of this looks anything like Equestria. It's darker, everything in here is so bigger... I just want to go home."
>Shit, don't start crying...!
"Everything in here? Erm... If you don't mind, for how long have you been here?"
>That's it, Anon. Keep her talking, tears are bad, words are good.
>"I don't know for sure, I just... I went to bed last night, and woke up here. I can't tell the time, and when I woke up, all the lights were off... It feels like I've been asleep for a really long time."
>"Wait... How are you speaking my language? You understand me, and I'm understanding you? This makes no sense..."
 
>>15827975 #
"I don't know, either... I was just--"
>Think quick, Anon, what were you doing?
"...I was just out for a walk, and I come home and find you in my hallway. I've got as little information as you do."
>Her brow drops into a glare, surprising you.
>"As little information as I do, huh? I have to disagree on that one, guy! At least you know where you woke up this morning. At least you know where you are, and get to deal with this from the comfort of your own home! Let me be honest here: I've never been more scared in my entire life. I've been attacked by an army of demonic bug-ponies, I've had my whole world swathed in eternal night, and none of that is anywhere close to having some giant monkey-monster asking you questions in a crazy place after you've been as good as kidnapped!"
>The end of her rant leaves her in tears, and she falls to the floor in sobs.
>You hear the timer go off on your sauce in the kitchen.
 
Wat do, /mlp/?
 
>>15828403 #
>You sit down as before against the wall towards which Lyra is facing (left of the door, looking in).
"Okay, it's true that your situation is a lot worse than mine right now. But I'd like to make it as clear as possible that nobody is going to do lift a finger against you, especially me."
>...
>Shit, she doesn't have fingers.
"Or, in your case, no one will lift a hoof against you."
>You let out a nervous chuckle at your own insensitivity.
>Though you can't see any change at first, an odd buckle emits through Lyra's sobs.
>Did she just chuckle?
>The cyan mare looks up, her cheeks soaked with tears.
>Her eyes are doing that shaking thing again.
>"You're... You're s-sure, right? How do I know y-you're not lying to me?"
>This stumps you for a bit, but it takes only a few seconds before you come up with a semi-reasonable answer.
"If I wanted to hurt you, I'd have done it already. I've left the room more than once, I could have grabbed a weapon or something."
>You hold out your hands again, expressing their emptiness.
"See? Nothing."
>Once again, Lyra seems to stare at your hands.
>"You know", she says through a few sniffles, "you 'hyoo-manz' sure do look different. You don't have hooves at all, do you?"
>You chuckle, shaking your head.
"Nope. Just hands and feet, with fingers on the former and toes on the latter. If you want a closer look, just ask."
>She reaches up to wipe her eyes, clearing her vision for a few moments before giving a slow nod.
>"Sure, I guess..."
>Her words trail off once you extend your left hand to hang just in front of and below her face.
>She bends down quizzically, first sniffing your fingers, and then reaching out with a hoof to touch them.
 
>You never thought you'd actually get to touch a pony's hooves before.
>And now, one is gingerly inspecting your hand with an obviously increasing interest.
>"Those fingers look pretty useful, huh," she muses.
"Yeah, I guess so..."
 
Wat do now?
 
>>15829085 #
Anon can do that!
 
>>15828862 #
"Well, yeah, I suppose so. I mean, I really use them for just about everything..."
>You ponder a moment, scooching over to sit against the wall next to Lyra.
>She doesn't seem to mind, so you let her continue examining your hand while you speak.
"I open doors with my fingers by grabbing the knob, I clean pretty much everything by grasping something with my fingers. I can eat, push, pull, lift, pleasure, or carry things, and I can wear--"
>Lyra looks at you with an eyebrow raised, her lips parted in a silent stare of bewilderment.
>"...pleasure?"
>shitshitshit
"Oh, well, you know, erm..."
>SHITSHITSHITSHIT
"Massages! My mother worked at a spa before she died, and she was a masseuse. She taught me some tricks along the way."
>Lyra's lips close, and she gives a hint of a smile.
>"I see... Well, you'll have to teach me more about these fingers of yours."
>Two for two on saves today, Anon. Nice work.
"Yeah, sure thing... Erm, I've got some spaghetti cooking right now, as you might remember from my ever so graceful trips to the other room earlier. If you're hungry, I'd be more than happy to share."
>She looks away, pursing her lips for a moment before shrugging with a sigh.
>"I suppose there's nothing to lose at this point, right... Anon, you said?"
"Yeah. Anonymous, but call me Anon."
>"Right, right. Well, my name is Lyra Heartstrings, Anon. Call me 'Lyra'."
"Sure thing... Lyra."
>Congrats, Anon, you're on a first name basis with the cartoon horse of your Internet obsession and (on occasion) the cartoon horse of your dreams.
>Now you just have to figure out what the hell you're going to do with her.
"Oh, wait... Erm, you do eat spaghetti, right?"
>Lyra nods. "Yes, now and again. I still find it amazing that we speak the same language, much less share the same foods."
"Yeah... Pretty convenient, I'd say."
>You get into the kitchen and offer the blue pony a chair.
 
lyrafag 01/22/14(Wed)15:45 UTC-5 No.15838379
Replies: >>15839546
 
    >tfw applehat isn't back
 
    The name works just fine, actually; thanks. Once again, I've never done this before, and didn't know that a name would be necessary.
 
    Lemme check up where I was and find the writing I was on when I passed out last night, and get this shit going again.
 
>>
lyrafag 01/22/14(Wed)16:03 UTC-5 No.15838626
Replies: >>15838870 >>15839073 >>15839292
 
    >Your new acquaintance takes her seat, sitting once again in that position everyone online kept yammering on about.
    >The microwave beeps angrily at you, thankfully keeping the irony of your "Lyra has a human fetish" headcanon out of your mind as you toss the sauce and noodles together.
    >Lyra simply glances about the room, clearly still wary of her situation.
    >The meal is finished within another minute or so, and you bring the skillet to the table and sit down.
    >"...Anon?"
    "Yes?"
    >"We're going to need silverware, right?"
    >Whoops! You nod and stammer out a line to keep the awkward silence at bay (to no avail).
    >Nobody knows how to speedily set a table quite like you, Anon.
    >You even remembered the plates!
    "I don't know how hungry you may or may not be, but go on and help yourself to as much or as little as you like. I've got plenty."
    >She takes a surprisingly large portion (she must eat like a horse!) and begins twirling it about on her fork, staring at your yet untouched food.
    >Picking up the "don't fucking poison me" vibe, you take a large bite.
    >It's then that you realize that you haven't eaten in quite some time, having been browsing the Web for several hours before heading to the diner to meet with the OP.
    >You take several more bites, then, attempting to end the already very awkward meal; the corners of Lyra's lips tug upwards as she watches you ravage the pasta.
    >"Pretty hungry, huh, Anon?"
    >She takes a bite of her own food, chewing for a moment before tilting her head to the side in a quizzical look.
    >"Anon, what's in this? I've never had anything with this kind of... Texture, I guess. It's pretty tasty," she compliments, spearing a bit of hamburger meat with her fork and showing it to you.
 
    Oh, great. Meat-eating and ponies don't really go well together, do they? Wat do?
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/22/14(Wed)16:44 UTC-5 No.15839292
Replies: >>15839495 >>15839805
 
    >>15838870 #
 
    >>15838626 #
    >You sigh, figuring that if the autist who started all of this was right about there being a pony in your home, he'd be right about her leaving if she were to be discovered.
    "Well, to be honest? It's meat. This is from a cow, actually," you begin to explain.
    >She drops both fork and jaw, completely stunned.
    >Your palms begin to sweat, and you're thankful that you're sitting down because your knees are shaking already (even without your weight on them).
    "I guess it might seem messed up to you, but here? Horses don't talk. Here, humans are the only anything that talk. I guess you know what cows are, but if you were to see one around this place? It wouldn't even register that you're speaking to it. There are a lot of animals that are kept as pets, but they don't have the..."
    >You let your explanation die off, as Lyra's seemed to lose focus on you.
    >She's staring through you rather than at you, her entire body beginning to shake.
    "Um... Lyra?"
    >Good work, Anon, you've fucked this one up for sure.
    "Lyra...?"
    >That's when she loses her shit.
    >Her horn begins to glow a shade of blue slightly lighter than her coat and she jumps from her chair, magicking a crack down the middle of your table.
    >"I AM GOING HOME!"
    "No, wait, Lyra, you can't--!"
    >She glares at you, the malice in her eyes made more evident by the quickly growing light emanating from her horn.
    >"And why the buck NOT?"
    "Because..."
    >Think quick, Anon, think quick!
    "Because you'll be eaten!"
    >Fuck.
    "Just like the cow in the sauce, that's just the way it works around here. Humans eat animals. We're omnivores, that's just the way things are! And there are humans who don't care at all what it is they're eating, so long as it's meat; they'd jump at the chance for something unique."
    >Your chest rises and falls rapidly, and your knuckles are white from gripping the table.
    >She glares at you for a few moments more before extinguishing her magic and slumping to the floor in tears.
 
    Wat do?
 
 
>>15839495 #
Probably a good decision.
 
>>15839292 #
>You sit there for a moment, torn between feeling sorry for the distraught mare and relieved that she's no longer aiming to castrate you (or worse).
"You do know that I'd never attempt to eat you, right?"
>She continues sobbing for a few moments before looking up at you through tear-blurred eyes:
>"You don't understand how messed up this is right now... You sickos eat other creatures, and then you feed ME one?"
>"And now you expect me to just feel better because you say that I'm not next on the menu?"
>She turns away in disgust.
"Well, Lyra, I..."
>You move from the chair to the floor and speak.
"I mean, here we don't eat 'other' creatures. We're different from you-- we humans view ourselves as superior to the animals around here, because we're the most developed."
"We're the smartest, we're the ones who have developed speech... Humans have been eating animals since before recorded history. They eat each other all the time, so I guess the guys who started it all just followed by example."
>You sigh, shrugging.
"I know it's a lot to take in, but you have to believe me-- the ability to talk, and to feel, to express emotion... Humans eat animals, but you're only like them in appearance (and even that's debatable). I've talked to you, I can tell that you've been scared. I wouldn't ever hurt you like I'd never hurt any of my other friends..."
>Well, if you could call your parents or Internet-companions "friends".
>She sighs herself, letting the air out with a massive shudder.
>"We're... Friends?"
"Well, sure. At least, I hope so."
>She looks up again, still glaring at you-- but within moments, her expression softens.
>"Well... I don't know about that, but you're definitely the closest thing I've got here."
>You smile warmly, standing up and offering a hand to her.
"C'mon, Lyra. You've got the run of the place from here on out, until we can figure out how to get you home; I'll show you around.
>"Home..."
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/22/14(Wed)23:17 UTC-5 No.15846530
Replies: >>15846681 >>15846991
 
    >>15839805 #
    >Well, Anon, you're already this far into the lie.
    >No point busting it up now, just keep the ruse up and hope for the best.
    "Well, of course! You do want to go home, right?"
    >Of course she does, she just tried to blow up your goddamn kitchen.
    >Good thing your landlord didn't own that table.
    >"Of course I do", she snaps.
    >Clearly, this pone is still pretty upset with you.
    "And I'll do everything I can to help."
    >She keeps her gaze locked forward with no expression on her face at all.
    >Having reached the hallway, you lead Lyra down its length and back.
    >She takes in each room carefully, nodding slowly as you explain the bathroom's functions in a quick overview.
    "And don't worry-- I know it's not designed with you in mind, but I think you'll manage just fine."
    >She gives it what appears to be an anxious look before moving on with you.
    >After maybe ten minutes of tour, making sure to open up every closet and door (other than the front entrance), you and Lyra find yourselves back in the hallway.
    >A glance at your watch shows the time as just after nine PM on this fine Tuesday night.
 
    Wat do?
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/22/14(Wed)23:38 UTC-5 No.15846991
Replies: >>15847146 >>15847388 >>15847717 >>15847998
 
    >>15846681 #
    Sleep is for the weak. And pone.
 
    >>15846530 #
    >The two of you stand around awkwardly for a moment or two.
    >In a burst of social genius, you decide to go clean up the damage in the kitchen.
    "Alright, Lyra, you've had the grand tour. I suppose you have the run of the place... I'm going to go clean up the kitchen, if you don't mind some solitude for a bit."
    >She sighs, giving you a very stiff nod and briskly stepping into the den where you keep your computer.
    "She's going to ask what your PC is, Anon... You'll have to figure out how to explain a shitton of technological advancement to a pony who clearly doesn't like you very much."
    >You heave a sigh of your own as you take to cleaning the refuse from the floor and the remains of your once-whole table.
    >Lyra's magic shattered the center of the table into several dozen fragments and fractures, leaving the ends both standing on their legs but bent to the floor in the center of the whole thing.
    >It really looks like a letter "M" from the side.
    >You pick up the largest of the chunks from the floor and, with some effort, scoot the standing remains against the wall.
    >"Anon...!?"
    >The startled yelp brings you rushing to your computer room, where you find Lyra staring wide-eyed at your screen.
    >She sees a blue background with some text, which reads something along the lines of ">You have 2 choices".
    >Fucking hell...
 
    Wat do?
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)00:33 UTC-5 No.15847998
 
    >>15847717 #
    On it.
 
    >>15846991 #
    >Remember, anon, there's a baseball bat in the corner. You might have a chance if you see the magic shit starting up soon enough.
    "Um..."
    >While you sit there and stall, Lyra's irises begin to shimmer and shake.
    >You haven't really been around all that long, but nothing could have ever prepared you for the agonizing despair that's just come over you.
    >Maybe you've never admitted it, but there's a reason Lyra is the one who was brought to you.
    >She's not the fastest pony, or the smartest; she doesn't have an unmatched sense of style or an orchard of profitable apples to offer.
    >You know deep down that all those fanfics (both shitty and genius), those hours spent updating her Wiki page?
    >They all meant something.
    >And now, because of your selfish actions, you've ruined her.
    >You did this, Anon.
    >You ruined her.
    "Lyra... I'm s-so..."
    >Nah, brah, no tears.
    >You're above that, anon.
    >The first step to fixing a fuck-up is admitting that you've fucked up.
    "Lyra, I... I've screwed up."
    >Her lower lip trembling and shaking, Lyra slinks to the floor and covers her head with her hooves.
    >"No, no, no, no..."
    >The second step is letting the offended party know that you truly regret fucking up so badly.
    "Lyra, I really did screw up. I was reading what you saw on that box up there, and I didn't believe it for a second; I figured it would be nice to have someone around, so I wouldn't be so alone all the time, and thought that I'd like option 2 better so I wouldn't have to leave my own home."
    >She's curled up into what seems like the pony-fetal-position now and, though there's no way to tell if she's listening, you keep talking.
    "Of course, the irony in that is that it's exactly what happened to you; I ripped you away from everything you knew without your consent on my own selfish whim and, Lyra Heartstrings, I have never felt more sorry or more regret for anything before in my whole life."
 
    (cont.)
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)00:33 UTC-5 No.15847998
 
    >>15847717 #
    On it.
 
    >>15846991 #
    >Remember, anon, there's a baseball bat in the corner. You might have a chance if you see the magic shit starting up soon enough.
    "Um..."
    >While you sit there and stall, Lyra's irises begin to shimmer and shake.
    >You haven't really been around all that long, but nothing could have ever prepared you for the agonizing despair that's just come over you.
    >Maybe you've never admitted it, but there's a reason Lyra is the one who was brought to you.
    >She's not the fastest pony, or the smartest; she doesn't have an unmatched sense of style or an orchard of profitable apples to offer.
    >You know deep down that all those fanfics (both shitty and genius), those hours spent updating her Wiki page?
    >They all meant something.
    >And now, because of your selfish actions, you've ruined her.
    >You did this, Anon.
    >You ruined her.
    "Lyra... I'm s-so..."
    >Nah, brah, no tears.
    >You're above that, anon.
    >The first step to fixing a fuck-up is admitting that you've fucked up.
    "Lyra, I... I've screwed up."
    >Her lower lip trembling and shaking, Lyra slinks to the floor and covers her head with her hooves.
    >"No, no, no, no..."
    >The second step is letting the offended party know that you truly regret fucking up so badly.
    "Lyra, I really did screw up. I was reading what you saw on that box up there, and I didn't believe it for a second; I figured it would be nice to have someone around, so I wouldn't be so alone all the time, and thought that I'd like option 2 better so I wouldn't have to leave my own home."
    >She's curled up into what seems like the pony-fetal-position now and, though there's no way to tell if she's listening, you keep talking.
    "Of course, the irony in that is that it's exactly what happened to you; I ripped you away from everything you knew without your consent on my own selfish whim and, Lyra Heartstrings, I have never felt more sorry or more regret for anything before in my whole life."
 
    (cont.)
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)00:49 UTC-5 No.15848270
Replies: >>15848367 >>15848542
 
    >>15847998 #
    Cont:
 
    >At this point, your plan of action regarding speech has long since run out.
    >You're speaking your mind in the most open way you can, disregarding the consequences that may come of it; it's all-or-nothing.
    >The light turquoise mare stares up at you, watching your eyes and lips change and shift with each phrase that rolls off your tongue.
    "I know that you're upset, I know that you're scared, and I know for damn certain that I've hurt you."
    >You drop to your knees, slumping backwards and letting the words cascade from within the deepest parts of you.
    "Like I said before, I had no idea that it would be possible to bring you here. I had no idea anything even remotely like that was possible..."
    >Don't break down now, anon, just keep going. You can do it.
    "But if I had honestly thought it was real? I would have never wished this upon you, not for the world. I don't ever want to see you hurt, Lyra, and I'm already horridly ashamed that I've brought this on you."
    >Here goes everything...
    >You lean forward, pressing your forehead to your knees.
    "Lyra Heartstrings, I promise you now that I will never hurt you again. I promise you that I never meant to hurt you.
 
    "And I promise that I will do all I can to help you find a way home."
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)01:05 UTC-5 No.15848542
Replies: >>15848728
 
    >>15848270 #
    cont:
 
    >Silence.
    >...
    >More silence.
    >...
    >Even more si--
    >No, wait.
    >A tug on your hair.
    >Hot breath on your scalp.
    >Lyra has taken a hold of your hair with her teeth and gently tugged your head up.
    >You've never been this close to her, and none of the fanart could have prepared you for this.
    >She's not a pony, a part of a cartoon; she's another being with feelings and emotions.
    >She has her own dreams and ambitions, her own wants and needs; she's only different from you in the way she looks.
    >"Promise me that, Anon."
    "What...?"
    >"Promise me that you didn't believe anything would come of your selfishness. Promise me that you mean it when you say you'll help me get home, promise me that there won't be any more lies, just..."
    >"Promise me that you'll be here for me, Anon."
    >Your arms are around her before the tears can spill over her eyes again.
    >All the threads about hugging a pony, the countless rants about how much affection from one of the characters could mean?
    >They don't even come close.
    >She buries her head in your shoulder, and you feel several warm spots forming in the fabric of your shirt.
    "Don't cry, Lyra. I brought you here, and now I'm going to stay here. Right here, with you, for as long as it takes to make things right."
    >She continues sniffling into you for some time.
    >Seconds, minutes, hours?
    >It doesn't matter, because Lyra needs you.
    >Hell, you needed her, too.
    >It'll work out, Anon, don't worry.
    >Enjoy your moment.
    >The stress of the night has knocked your hoofed companion out cold; the only thing left to do is put her to bed.
    >You lay her down in yours and tuck her in.
    >With a kiss on her forehead, you back out the still-ajar door and sit down in your den to think.
 
    Wat do?
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)01:31 UTC-5 No.15848945
 
    >>15848728 #
    An excellent idea, Anon!
 
    >>15848542 #
    "Well... That went over pretty well, I suppose. Not bad for a first day!"
    >You read through the changes in the thread, reading up on several decent stories in the process.
    "Huh... I should write one of those sometime."
    >Shrugging, you take into account all the detail that's gone into the fine print of the original post.
    >It would appear that revealing Lyra's presence to anyone else in any way would result in her being taken from you immediately.
    >Judging by how she got here, you doubt that she'd simply cease to exist; most likely, that fedora-wearing autist would keep her chained up somewhere or something.
    >Coming to this conclusion rules out the possibility of using her discovery to get her home.
    >It's a bit unnerving how relieved you feel after that conclusion.
    "Well, she's bound to have questions in the morning. I should start with the show itself, then move on to our technology..."
    >You spend several hours planning out your explanation, until you finally glance at the clock and realize the time.
    "Three thirty in the morning... Sonofabitch," you complain.
    >You spend fifteen minutes preparing a palette of blankets and cushions on the floor of your bedroom and settle yourself down, only to be asleep within moments.
 
    Okay , /mlp/. I think I'll call it quits for the night here, until the thread gets more active. If anyone is lurking here, though, and wants more? I'll happily oblidge.
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)16:38 UTC-5 No.15856961
Replies: >>15857031 >>15857191 >>15857308
 
    >>15848945 #
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    "Hey, look. I woke up again," you think to yourself from within a field of darkness.
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    "Damn, my bed feels more and more like the couch every day. Gotta start fapping into a condom or something..."
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    "Wasn't something important going on...?"
    >Oh, shit.
    >You're currently playing host to an emotionally ravaged bright turquoise magical talking horse from a children's cartoon.
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    >And you pretty much fucked everything up beyond all recognition between the two of you yesterday.
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    >And then you started pouring your heart out, you promised you'd never do wrong by her again, and then she fell asleep, and--
    >"BZZT BZZT BZZT"
    "Oh, for fuck's sake..."
    >Your late 90's tech alarm clock finally meets its end as you struggle to your feet and smack that little bitch-ass clock like a little bitch-ass clock.
    "Fucking hell," you think, afraid that you've woken Lyra.
    >But, glancing at your double bed, you find that she's nowhere in sight.
    >The comforter and blankets are neatly folded (something you don't think you've ever done before since moving out of your parents' place), but you can spot a few blue hairs lining the position in which you had set the pony the night before.
    >You call out into the apartment, stepping quickly into the hallway and trying not to panic.
    "Lyra? Where are you?"
    >Luckily, you notice a change in the place since last night.
    >Due to Lyra's diminutive size, you'd opened up all of the inner doors to allow her full range of the apartment; now, it's clear that the door to the bathroom has been shut.
    >You rush forward and prevent yourself from giving the door a frenzied pounding.
    >Knock. Knock. Knock.
    >There's no response.
    >Knock knock knock.
    >...nothing.
    >Knockknockknock
    "Lyra...? Are you in there?"
    >A few moment's pause, and then:
    >"Go... Go away, Anon, just give me a minute!"
    >Sonofabitch.
 
    Wat do?
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)16:58 UTC-5 No.15857308
Replies: >>15857421 >>15858381
 
    >>15857031 #
    Confirmed, firing for effect.
 
    >>15856961 #
    "Just making sure you're... Alright?"
    >Smooth, Anon.
    >Real fucking smooth.
    >You sigh and trekk back down the hall, stopping by the den to bump the "2 choices" thread and then making sure to lock your computer.
    "If only I had done this earlier..."
    >You go to the kitchen, sighing for the second time when you see the smashed table.
    >Maybe it would be a good idea to remove any reminders of last night's events while you can?
    >Yes, yes it would.
    >You pick up one of the halves of the table and hurry out into the hallway.
    >Due to it being only half of the weight of the full table, it's a lot easier to remove than it was to get inside.
    >You're even lucky enough to have the Asian man who lives next door catch you in the hallway, and help you carry it down the stairs.
    >You quickly bullshit a story about an angry girl last night throwing things around in your apartment (kind of true), and Mr. Yugimoto offers to help you with the other half.
    >Shrugging, you accept, and tell him that you'll run up and drag it from your apartment.
    >You're already up two of the five flights of stairs before he has time to offer a hand with that portion, and you make your way back to your humble abode only to find Lyra peering out from your front door.
    "Sonofa--"
    >You essentially tackle the small mare, diving to the floor with her underneath you and kicking the door closed.
    >"Anon, what the hay!?" she shouts, scrabbling to get out from under you.
    "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I just..."
    >You start to stand up, mentally kicking your own ass.
    "The man who lives next door will be up here any second. You read the stupid thread, you know what will happen if you're seen..."
    >She seems to be at a loss for words, before tightly pursing her lips and nodding.
    >"Of course. I'm a shut-in, trapped in your care until who-knows-when. I nearly forgot."
    >She makes a brisk exit, heading for your room; you sigh and finish the table-errand, returning to the hall.
 
    Wat do?
 
 
lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)18:11 UTC-5 No.15858381
Replies: >>15858776 >>15858824 >>15858846 >>15858966
 
    >>15857421 #
    Initiating protocol...
 
    >>15857308 #
    "Lyra, wait..."
    >You heave a heavy sigh, once again certain that you've pushed Lyra even further away.
    >She sighs herself and turns around, ending your short chase after her.
    >"Yes, Anon?"
    >The disdain hurts.
    "Look, Lyra, I panicked. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be overprotective or anything; it's just... Well, like I said before. I don't know how this whole 'deal' thing works..."
    >What hurts more, though, is watching her expression fall further and further with every word.
    "...but we can't risk someone seeing you just now, or you could be lost forever. I've looked the whole situation over, and there's no way to tell what would happen if you were to be 'taken away...'"
    >The mare seems to pause for a few moments, contemplating what you've said.
    >She slips her lower lip between her teeth, wracked with an internal debate; that lip bite, however, looks like it could be quite appealing in a different situation (not to mention being adorable as all get-out right now).
    "I know that it's my fault you're stuck in this spot, Lyra. And you need to know that I'll do everything I can to help right my wrongs."
    >Her gaze shifts first to the floor, and then up to your eyes.
    >They're doing that goddamn shimmery thing again.
    >"Alright, Anon. I understand. And I guess I can't really blame you, anyway-- I bet everypony's had their selfish fantasies now and again. I sure wouldn't have actually taken something like that seriously."
    >For the first time since she's arrived, Lyra manages to smile.
    >"I do appreciate what you're trying to do for me, Anon."
    >Well, I'll be a son of a bitch.
    >Looks like OP's promise about her growing on you might be coming through.
    >Better keep up the good work, Anon, you definitely could use a bit of time without any massive fuck-ups.
    "Thank you, Lyra. That means a lot."
    >Smile in return, check.
    "You know, I--"
    >"Grumblegrumblegrumblegrumble"
    "...Do you want breakfast?"
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)18:47 UTC-5 No.15858966
Replies: >>15859096 >>15859195 >>15859561 >>15859955
 
    >>15858776 #
    On it. You were one off from trips, too... What would I have done in that scenario?
 
    >>15858381 #
    >Lyra goes from softly smiling to hiding her face behind a hoof.
    >"Pfftch... I can tell that you do!"
    "Who, me? Of course not, I'm not--"
    >"GRUMBLEGRUMBLEGRUMBLEGRUMBLE
    >You had heard the ponies laugh before in the show, but the sweet peal of Lyra's voice could easily replace your top rated track on your iPhone.
    >"Not hungry, huh?" she teases, hoofing her way towards the kitchen.
    >"I'd love some breakfast, Anon."
    >You can't help but grin yourself as you follow, doing your best to ignore the sweet pony ass currently proceeding in front of you.
    "Yeah, I think I know what I'd like to eat..."
    >"Oh," she asks, "you do? What are we having?"
    >Goddammit--
    "Pancakes."
    >You rush the words out, not even stopping to consider that you may or may not possess pancakes in your home.
    >The blue pony nods agreeably, pausing when she enters the kitchen.
    >"Where... Where will we be eating, exactly?"
    >Her normally turquoise cheeks have drifted to a light shade of red; she's clearly embarrassed by the reminder of last night's escapades.
    "We'll eat in the den. There's enough room for the two of us, and I've got something to show you."
    >Her blush calmed by the confirmation that you DO, in fact, have a plan, Lyra's brow rises in suspicion.
    >"Something you'd like to show me, huh? Alright..."
    >She keeps that look on her face as you begin busying yourself in the kitchen, luckily finding instant pancake mix in the back of a cabinet.
    >Within five or so minutes, the two of you find yourselves sitting on the loveseat in your den, with a laptop on the desk in front of you.
    >Once again, Lyra's posture mimics that of the "Dragonshy" episode.
    >Chuckling inwardly, you quietly observe Lyra eating your food for a few moments.
    >She's made use of her magic to hold the fork, and other than that eats like an average person would.
    >Mulling all of this over, you wake up your laptop...
 
    What do ya show her?
 
 
lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)19:36 UTC-5 No.15859955
Replies: >>15860045 >>15860988
 
    >>15859322 #
    dubs confirms magic tricks!
 
    >>15858966 #
    "I doubt you've ever heard of David Blaine before... Maybe some kind of Mr. Mane? A guy who goes around performing magic on random persons?"
    >Lyra shrugs and shakes her head 'no.'
    >Well, it was worth a shot.
    "He's a magician around here. Not like the kind of magic you do, but more like crazy illusions. He'll read minds, maybe, or do all sorts of crazy tricks..."
    >The look on Lyra's face clearly resembles one you've seen Dwight from the Office make more than once; you should be getting to the point soon.
    "...Well, just watch."
    >You hit up YouTube and search up some of Blaine's street magic videos.
 
    >At first, Lyra seems more interested in watching the different people on the screen and asking you all about them, from their clothes to their different ethnicities.
    >It only hits you just then that your little pony friend hasn't seen any humans other than you since she arrived.
    >It would definitely be nice if she could somehow get out of your house for a while, under some kind of cover; exploring could do wonders for her spirits.
    >You're barely paying attention to the video anymore, running all of this through your head, when Lyra lets out a surprised gasp.
    >"Did he just-- What!?"
    >Blaine had just vomited up some Kerosene, lit it on fire, and then doused the fire by vomiting up water.
    >Your equine friend has just about lost her shit again-- only, this time, it's not because you dicked something up.
    >"ANON THAT'S SO CRAZY! How did he do that," she says, jumping from the seat.
    "Well, I know there's a video somewhere of him teaching himself the trick... Would you like to watch that one next?"
    >Lyra only nods, her eyes fixed on the screen.
    >It's good to know that she's so fond of magic tricks, you suppose; that might come in handy sometime.
    >You find the video rather quickly and excuse yourself to the bathroom while she watches with baited breath.
 
    I'm in a similar boat to Applebutt; excuse the delays, lovelies.
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)20:33 UTC-5 No.15860988
Replies: >>15861031 >>15861112 >>15861126 >>15861161 >>15861192 >>15861518
 
    >>15860045 #
    >>15860078 #
    Thanks, /mlp/. You really d-do understand me... ;_;
 
    >>15859955 #
    >One very satisfying urination later, you return to find that Lyra absorbed in the Blaine video.
    >"I don't know who this human is, Anon, but he and his tricks are really cool."
    "I'm glad you've found something around here you can enjoy, Lyra."
    >"What, you mean other than your oh-so-pleasant company?"
    >Would ya look at that?
    >Lyra just made a joke.
    >And not a horrible one, either, like the one your uncle Unclenon always tells at the family functions.
    "Ha-ha, very funny," you chastise.
    >The brightly colored horse has stopped with the jokes, though.
    >The video has come to a stop, and now Lyra is looking at you with an innocent gaze; goddammit, her eyes are fucking shimmering again...
    >"Anon?"
    "...Yeah, Lyra?"
    >"That... thing that brought me here. That bit of words explaining that 'your favorite pony is sent to you on earth' junk... How is it that you know who I am? How do you know of our world, when I've never even heard a fairy-tale about yours?"
    >momentoftruth.exe
    >She already knows that you're somehow watching them.
    >What harm could there be in showing her FiM?
    "Alright, Lyra... I figured this would come up sooner or later."
    >You reach up to the laptop and pull up your saved episodes.
    >You figure to start with S1E1&2, because Lyra has a line almost right off the bat.
    >She's also likely to remember when Nightmare Moon made her return and tried to drown all of Equestria in eternal night.
    "Lyra, I'm going to play this video for you. It's going to seem kind of crazy, but... Trust me, alright? Watch it through to the end, and then I'll explain everything."
    >You press "play" and watch the magic begin.
    >Right from the start of the intro, Lyra's eyes escalate to dinner plate size; she turns to say something, but you put a finger on her lips and shake your head.
    "Just watch."
    >
    >The forty+ minutes pass in relative silence, and she stares blankly ahead.
 
    Wat do, /mlp/?
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)21:04 UTC-5 No.15861518
Replies: >>15861550 >>15861567 >>15861592 >>15862041 >>15862181
 
    >>15860988 #
 
    >It looks like lyra.exe has crashed...
    >The white knight within you has given way to only one logical solution: the restarting powers of platonic physical affection.
    >You gently reach out and first put one hand on Lyra's far shoulder, draping your arm across the back of her barrel.
    "Here, your world... All of Equestria, from Canterlot to Manehattan? It was thought up by humans."
    >You feel a shiver run down the silent mammal's back.
    "It's a wonderful show on something called "Television", which is kind of like what you're looking at now, only without the letters on it. Humans make television shows to tell stories or share information, kind of like books or newspapers. There's a TV show for just about everything."
    >She nods very slowly.
    >"Everything, including a look at my whole world for amusement."
    >How the hell do you respond to something like that?
    "Well, not only amusement. A lot of TV shows, especially ones aimed at younger people, try to teach morals and life lessons, and ML-- ...this show is one of them."
    >She takes a moment before she nods again.
    >"So, if my world is just something out of someone's imagination... What does that make me?"
    >The best thing that's ever happened to you.
    "It doesn't make you anything. Someone else's thoughts don't define who or what you are, Lyra. I can't explain how you got here, and I doubt I'll ever find out; but that's just it. You ARE here, right now, with me. You exist just like I do, and you must have always done so. One can't just go creating new matter, for starters; you had to have existed before in order to exist now."
    >Lyra raises her brow at you, shaking her head.
    >"That makes about as much sense as trying to call a harp a giant lyre, Anon."
    >"Not very much."
    >You give a sheepish shrug.
    "I don't care if it makes sense or not. You're here now, and that's all that matters."
    >She looks down at her hooves, still processing it all. Then she looks up--
    >"Anon... Why me? Am I really your... favorite?"
 
    Wat do?
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)21:36 UTC-5 No.15862041
Replies: >>15862093 >>15862454
 
    >>15861792 #
 
    >>>15861518 #
    "Absolutely."
    >The syllables slip from your tongue long before you can consider the consequences of your answer.
    >And once they start, they don't stop very easily.
    "You've always been my favorite. The first episode I watched of the show was the time Fluttershy found some Parasprites, and ended up accidentally infesting Ponyville with them. Pinkie Pie ended up saving everyone with her musical apparatus."
    >Lyra glances away, checking your account against her memory.
    "At one point, some Parasprites ate your cake out from under your nose, and you ended up rather upset over it. I could only imagine what had been going on that day for you to get so upset over a piece of cake, but I was even more obsessed with how fricking adorable you were."
    >Come on, Anon, don't come on too strong now!
    >Lyra's face begins to flush, very faintly at first.
    "I mean, that was all there was to it at first. You were about a thousand times more pleasant to look at than any of the other characters in the show. It tends to focus more around Twilight Sparkle and her crew, but the writers would slip in-- Actually, now that I think about it, other ponies would sometimes enter the camera's view themselves, and take part in the show."
    >Keep it going, Anon, you can do it...
    "And every time you made an appearance, I jumped up and flipped out a little bit. You've been the object of my affections for over a year now. And I never even knew that you actually existed until just yesterday; I just went off of what the show and details around it told me, and figured you for--"
    >You put up air quotes for this next line.
    "'Best pony.' And now... Now I've got an arm around your shoulder, right here next to me. And it's the craziest thing that's ever happened to me."
    >Wow, Lyra's sure taken an interest in everything in the room other than you.
    >Finally, she looks up at you and leans up a tiny bit.
    "You've met me for real now, Anon, and seen all of this... Am I s-still your favorite pony...?"
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)22:01 UTC-5 No.15862454
Replies: >>15862508 >>15862614 >>15862659 >>15863044 >>15863086 >>15863108
 
    >>15862041 #
 
    >Whatever you do, Anon, don't fucking spaghetti.
    >
    >...
    >Come on, Anon, say or do SOMEthing!
    >...
    >......
    >Those goddamn shimmering eyes.
    >The shaking lip to go with them...
    >Wait.
    >Trembling lips mean--
    >"I'm sorry, Anon, I didn't mean to screw it all up so badly...!"
    >Lyra has gone to pieces.
    >She drops into your arms, throwing both hooves around your waist and sobbing into your shirt.
    >"I-I'm so s-sorr- *hic* -sorry, Anon..."
    >You've fucked up enough these past hours, Anon; it's time to man up.
    >If there is one thing that simply will not happen, it's that your little Lyra will not shed another tear.
    >Not a single.
    >Fucking.
    >One.
    "Lyra, Lyra... Lyra, look at me."
    >You gently tug on her chin, your arm still around her barrel, and pull her tear-streaked face level with yours.
    "If I could go back to just before I picked the choice in that thread, when you were sent here?"
    >No, Anon, don't say this, it's fucked up--
    "I'd pick the same option all over again."
    >Dammit, Anon...
    "I know it's been difficult, and I know I'm a horrible selfish prick because of it, but I would pick option number two every damn day."
    >You're fucked, Anon. Might as well shut up, she's going to hate you forever.
    "Because with all the drama, and all the tears, this fleeting time I've spent with you..."
    >It doesn't even matter anymore; say whatever you want. She's going to run out that door and get seen, because you--
    "Has been the best time in my entire life. I've gotten to know the mare I've been so taken with for so long. She's not the silly filly I met in the first episode of that show, and she's not some character that comes on every now and again."
    >Lyra has completely frozen up, save for those big, glistening, amber eyes gazing up at you.
    "You are the absolute best thing that has ever happened to me. You're not my favorite pony, you're my favorite person. And I would give anything to make your stay with me as wonderful for you as it has been for me."
    >...
    >Silence.
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)22:34 UTC-5 No.15863044
Replies: >>15863076 >>15863087 >>15863437
 
    >>15862454 #
 
    >A minute.
    >Two minutes.
    >Three.
    >Five, then ten.
    >Ten minutes of staring into the eyes of Lyra Heartstrings, tears still wet on her face, with your heart on your sleeve.
    >Ten minutes of the most gorgeous pair of sparkling irises, with your arms around the pony... No.
    >With your arms around the girl of your dreams.
    >"...Anon..."
    >A pause, and then:
    "Yes?"
    >"Anon... I don't know what to say, I..."
    "You don't have to say anything."
    >You put up a hand and run the backs of your four non-thumb digits down her cheek, dabbing at the streaks of liquid.
    >"Can... -Can- I say something then, Anon?"
    >You give a short, sharp exhale through your nose in place of a chuckle, the corners of your lips tilting upwards.
    "I would think so."
    >"Anon, can..."
    >She hesitates, finally averting her gaze.
    >Is that...
    >Is she blushing?
    >"Anon..."
    >What if I said that I was glad you made that choice?
    >
    >What.
    >
    >"What if I... What if I said that at first I was scared half to death, I was anxious and worried, and I would have given anything to get home or to have somepony else be here instead of me..."
    "Well, I'd say that I would expect that response, but--"
    >She gently puts a hoof to your lips, as you had done to her hours before.
    >"And then I said that all of those feelings had changed? That..."
    >She hesitates again, stumbling over her words.
    >"That I'm glad that I was your favorite, I'm glad that I've been put here? That I'm glad that I get to be here with you?"
    >You stop to ponder this for a moment, rather than rushing in once again.
    >Though, your track record sort of shows that a blind improvisation tends to work much better than all of this planning...
    "I would ask why, I suppose."
    >"Because, Anon..."
    >Lyra smiles softly.
    >"You've been pulling on my heartstrings."
 
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)22:53 UTC-5 No.15863437
Replies: >>15863467 >>15863588 >>15864014
 
    >>15863044 #
 
    >pulling on my heartstrings
    >It takes an intense bout of willpower not to bust out laughing right then and there.
    >No amount of willpower in the world, however, could keep the hot blush from coursing through your face.
    >You're pretty sure that a turquoise horse just dropped some kind of a platonic pick-up line on you.
    >And that's the closest you've ever come to actually getting somewhere with a female of any kind, so, good on you!
    "Oh, I have, have I?"
    >And then you come back with a teasing comment?
    >Jesus, Anon, since when are you this socially adept?
    >Lyra's blush races with yours, and she's the first one to crack and let out a giggle.
    >"Yeah, Anon, I guess so... You've been nothing but good to me. You're offering to protect me, to house me; I doubt even if anyone in Ponyville would be this kind in this kind of situation."
    >She swishes her head, knocking away a stray strand of mane that had found its way into her field of vision.
    >Or maybe she was doing some kind of sexy mane flip.
    >Both are attractive in their own right, though, so who really gives a shit?
    "Oh, really? You don't know how anyone in Ponyville would act if you were sitting in a loveseat, with your arms wrapped around one another?"
    >You even toss in a wink, you smooth motherfucker.
    >Lyra looks down, realizing that she's been wrapped in your arms for the past half hour or so.
    >"Oh, Anon, I'm so sorry, I--"
    >In her rush to give you some space, she knocks the loveseat over backwards and unceremoniously lands on top of you.
    >It's all playing out so perfectly, almost like one of those cancerous fanfics you read on /mlp/ now and again.
    "Pffch, hah!"
    >You laugh, savoring the moment of having her warm body on top of yours before helping both she and yourself to your respective hooves and feet.
    >"Thanks, Anon," Lyra says as you bend down to help her up.
    >"For everything."
    >She reaches up and manages to give your cheek a quick peck before standing once again on her own four hooves.
    >blushmode.jpg
 
lyrafag 01/23/14(Thu)22:55 UTC-5 No.15863467
Replies: >>15863588 >>15863589
 
    >>15863437 #
 
    Well, /mlp/ it's safe to say you're on her good side. It's not even noon yet; the two of you have the whole day to spend together (good thing you get Wednesdays off).
 
    Wat do?
 
lyrafag 01/24/14(Fri)22:57 UTC-5 No.15881362
Replies: >>15881465 >>15881538
 
    >>15878125 #
    >You think for a moment, deciding what to do now that you've got the rest of the day to spend together.
    >While you're sitting there busying yourself with thinking and whatnot, however, Lyra treks out of the room and down the hall.
    >Six or so thought-filled minutes later you find yourself wondering where your turquoise compadre has gotten off to.
    >Four or so steps into the hallway lead to the discovery of a closed bathroom door down the hall and, by extension, the realization that you now have a bit of time to prepare something special for your special something.
    >itsgotime.gif
    >Smirking to yourself, you dash to the closet in the den to grab your fold-out card table.
    >
    >"Anon, do you have any idea--"
    >Her jaw drops and her brows rise at the glorious mass of in-home entertainment presented before her.
    "Well? What do you think?"
    >You have every reason to be proud of the little surprise you'd whipped up in all of nine minutes; every board game, interesting movie, bit of vidya, and other two-person entertainment source you could find in the apartment all laid out for Lyra's viewing pleasure.
    >"Anon, I... What is all this stuff?"
    >Her eyes are doing that shimmery-thing again, but her smile indicates that it's more out of pleasure than angst.
    >Nice work, Anon!
    "Well, I figured that we have the whole of the day together, so I might as well find us some fun things to do. I've got board games, video games, all the decent movies I could find lying around. It'll be great," you explain with pride.
    >Lyra's grin mimics something you might have expected from Pinkie and quite literally reaches both of her temples.
    >"Ohmygosh Anon, that's so great! This is going to be so much fun," she exclaims, leaping through the small space to throw her hooves around your shoulders; She's small enough to where her back hooves aren't even on the ground.
    >"C'mon, Anon, let's play!"
    >Her joy is starting to rub off, so you give her a squeeze and set her down.
 
    Whaddya do first, /mlp/?
 
 
lyrafag 01/24/14(Fri)23:46 UTC-5 No.15882438
Replies: >>15884057 >>15885050
 
    >>15881362 #
    >Despite her enthusiasm, Lyra stops short and hesitates once she's been set down.
    >"Um, Anon?"
    "Yes, Lyra?"
    >Damn, wonder if she'd tolerate a pet name of some kind. Worth a shot at some point, you suppose.
    >"I just realized... I don't really know any of these games," she confesses, looking up at you helplessly. "What would you recommend?"
    >You figure there has to be some passable reason as to why it is this little pony can make absolutely anything the most adorable thing you've ever seen.
    "Uhmm... Well," you muse, quickly taking to the video games, "Let's see... Here's one: Super Smash Bros!"
    >You grab the case and present it to your companion, who sparks up her magic and levitates it to a proper viewing angle.
    >"Looks sort of... Violent, don't you think?"
    >She seems rather off-put by the content of the game, eyeing it warily.
    "Oh, don't worry about it, Lyra. Trust me, they do hit one another, but here's nothing remotely gory or bloody about it. They even specify in the game that the characters are only becoming knocked out, rather than dying," you explain.
    >It then hits you that Lyra has never seen or heard of any of these characters before.
    >The greatest thing that's ever happened to you has never even considered the existence of the second greatest thing to happen to you: Nintendo.
    >"Are you sure, Anon?"
    >She looks up at you once again, and on her face you detect something you've never truly seen on someone before.
    >She trusts you, Anon.
    >Isn't it odd the way this is all working out?
    >Fourteen hours ago, this little package of pony perfection was about to magick a hole in your face.
    >And now, she's looking up at you like you'd always imagined a daughter might; you're all she's got, and she's putting her faith into you.
    >It's not weird that you're getting all of this from her asking you if SSBM is a safe game to play, is it?
    "It's a great game, Lyra, one of my favorites. It'll be great."
    >Come to think of it? She's all you've got, too.
    "Trust me."
 
lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)02:10 UTC-5 No.15885050
Replies: >>15885095 >>15885098
 
    >>15881362 #
    >>15882438 #
    >It takes a few attempts to teach Lyra how to operate the controls with her magic.
    >But once she's got it down, the lack of tiring thumbs gives her a unique talent for button-mashing.
    "...Damn."
    >Forty-five minutes in, she's consistently forcing the two level 6 CPUs on the opposing team to eat Young Link's shit.
    >"You were right, Anon, this IS fun~!"
    >You almost wish that you could take a picture of it; she just looks so...
    >Happy.
    >It's tough for one to be happy when thrown into a world nearly built entirely against her, but it looks like you just might be able to help her with that.
    >Assuming you can ever recover from getting shown up at your own bread-and-butter game, of course.
    >"TAKE THAT YOU BUCK-BEAKED BIRDIE BIT!"
    >Damn, she's really getting into this.
    >And kicking the shit out of Falco.
    >You've been switching characters every match for the sake of variety.
    >It's funny, too...
    >You vividly remember roflstomping the CPUs with Ness back in the day, but right now your PK Thunder accuracy is rendering your recoveries useless.
    >"C'mon, Anon, get with it! You've only got two stock left," Lyra shouts at you, lightly slapping her face with your tail.
    >Goddammit, that's all kinds of soft, isn't it?
    "Alright, alright, I'm on it! But it's hard to play well when you're distracted by something so adorable."
    >...
    >That was aloud, wasn't it?
    >On-screen, Young Link slowly falls off of the stage as another one of Lyra's stock ticks off the screen.
    >"...what was that, Anon?"
    "N-noth..."
    >No, Anon.
    >No spaghetti, only dreams now.
    "Oh, you heard me, Lyra."
    >Your voice, to your amazement, takes a teasing tone as you K.O. Falco for the fifth time and eliminate him from the match.
    >In the lull, you manage a wink to the red-faced equine.
    >She's still not playing, and Captain Falcon manages a Falcon Punch right into her character's face; Toon Link falls once again.
    "C'mon, Lyra, focus! You're down to two stock," you say, booping her nose.
    >Damn good work, anon.
 
lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)02:59 UTC-5 No.15885725
 
    >>15885050 #
    >The four-legged friend of yours could smash a sealed Scars of Mirrodin event with all of the red in her face.
    >Your smooth talking and cute actions have really put her off her guard; adorable though it may be, Ness isn't quick enough to prevent her from getting knocked down again by Captain Falcon.
    "Lyra...?"
    >You pause the game, suspicious as to whether or not something deeper has gone on to force this change beyond your harmless flirting.
    >The musical mare's eyes are shut, and her head is craned downward; the unicorn's breaths are short and sharp, and she's doing some rather intense fidgeting in her seat.
    "Lyra...? Are you al--"
    >She's already halfway out of the room.
    >"SORRY ANON BE RIGHT BACK!"
    >...what?
    >You hear a door slam from the hall; history says that she's entered the bathroom.
    "What in the hell just got into her," you wonder.
    >That's when you notice the wet spot on her side of the cushion.
    >...seriously.
    >What the fuck just happened?
    >You sit there and stare at the blotch of dark coloration, rather unsure as to what to do or think.
    >The seat itself is a light golden color, preventing you from easily discerning what the mystery substance might consist of.
    >You sit down for a bit, running a hand across your brow, and try to think through all the possibilities.
    >
    >A good ninety seconds of thought has led you to the following different poissible viewpoints:
    >Option 1: the most obvious one, that she's for some reason lost control of her bladder.
    >Problem is, pissing isn't really your fetish; here's to hoping it's not that.
    >Option 2: Some type of female arousal liquid.
    >You didn't think you had been anywhere near that alluring, but who knows how she might react to flirting?
    >It's not like you have experience.
    >Option 3, and you hope to God (or Celestia, or Luna, or whatever the fuck works) that it's not this one:
    >She's just hit her period, or some other female thing.
    >If anything were ever cringe-worthy...
 
    What does /mlp/ think it is?
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)03:33 UTC-5 No.15886179
Replies: >>15886232
 
    >>15885725 #
    >Well, at this point, there's only one thing to do.
    >You need to find out what this mystery liquid is, and there's no way you're eating that shit (on the off chance that it could, in fact, be shit).
    >Leaning over, you prepare yourself for the worst and take a sniff of an unknown bodily fluid produced by one certain wonderful candy-colored horse.
    >If only one of those crazy-ass anons on /mlp/ were here to see this, eh?
    >...
    >Ooooooohhhhh, Lyra...
    >Urine trouble now.
    >Taking the time to consider all the possibilities, you judge that it could certainly be a lot worse.
    >It's rather small in volume compared to what went on in that story about Applejack from the thread.
    >Then again, that pretty much fucks your loveseat; there's not much to be said for cleaning horse urine out of polyester.
    "Shit, the damn thing's ruined..."
    >Right then, of course, you hear a voice you're always pleased to notice, with a tone you'd prefer to never hear again.
    >"Anon, I'm so sorry..."
    >You turn to face her, flinching at the shitty situation you've just muttered your way in to.
    "No, Lyra, it's no big deal--"
    >"Don't, Anon, please. I know it's messed up, it's disgusting, it's... I'm so sorry..."
    >You lunge down onto one knee, reaching out to cup Lyra's cheek with one hand and putting the other on her shoulder.
    >The lunge reminds you-- all of this business with Lyra has forced you to skip two workouts already.
    >You'll have to make up for the lost gains, Anon.
    "Lyra, I'm serious. It's no big deal at all, honestly. We'll just rock the paper towels and have it cleaned in a jiffy."
    >She refuses to look at you, instead turning her very blush-filled gaze to her hooves.
    >"I'm just so embarassed, Anon, I..."
    >You think a moment, coming up with yet another impromptu plan.
    "Well, maybe this will help spread the embarrassment out."
    >You reach down and pull up on the hem of your shirt, exposing your /fit/ body to your little pone.
    >Then, you realize that it's a bit extreme for the situation.
 
lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)03:41 UTC-5 No.15886253
 
    >>15886179 #
    "Um..."
    >You laugh nervously, registering a bit late that you haven't exposed any part of your body to a female since you started browsing /fit/ a few years back.
    >Well, at least the unicorn is looking at you again, right?
    "So, um, now we're both embarrassed. So, yeah."
    >The turquoise pony takes a moment to register that she's spoken to you, her eyes fully fixated on your unveiled physique.
    >"Oh, um, well... I don't think there's any reason for you to be embarrassed, Anon," she says, still staring at your upper body.
    >"I don't know much about humans, but... I'm embarrassed for a different reason now," she says, letting out a little giggle.
    >Wow, smooth.
    >It has become a race to see who will spaghetti first, it would seem.
    "Y-you, too, Lyra..."
    >...
    >Looks like that race ended pretty quickly.
    >Smooth moves, Anon.
 
    How is anon to redeem himself?
 
lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)04:22 UTC-5 No.15886727
Replies: >>15886747 >>15886778 >>15886803 >>15886805 >>15886972
 
    >>15886253 #
    >At this point, you're almost glad you've removed your shirt.
    >This way it won't get ruined with the metric tonnes of spaghetti spewing all over the room.
    >"So, um, Anon..."
    >OhgodshewantstheD
    >"Can I say something a little bit... crazy?"
    >Oh, GOD she wants the D
    "Sure thing, Lyra. You can tell me anything."
    >You can feel the spaghetti recede a tiny bit; that must have been somewhat not socially inept, so good work!
    >"As you probably know, I really don't know very much about the bodies of humans..."
    >She hesitates, the full blush returning.
    "Go on?"
    >"And, well, I guess you could say that I'm a bit..."
    >"Curious..."
    >"about the details of your kind," she finishes, finally tearing her gaze from your chest and stomach.
    >Not the most conventional flirting you've ever experienced...
    >If by "experienced" you mean read about, at least; this is the only flirting you've ever received.
    >Assuming that she's flirting with you, of course.
    "I think I understand, Ly--"
    >She cuts you off before you're able to finish.
    >"Of COURSE I'm not talking about anything PHYSICAL, you know, I would... I wouldn't ever, there's no way I would..."
    >Now her face is completely hidden by her hoof.
    "Um... Lyra?"
    >Jeez, Anon, and you thought all this spaghetti was coming from YOUR pockets!
    >A quick taste determines that the sauce is completely meat-free, so no worries about Lyra's diet.
    "...Lyra?"
    >She peeks out at you from over her hoof, only the tops of her bright amber eyes visible.
    >"Y-yes, Anon?"
    >2cute.jpg
    "If you want me to teach you a bit about us humans, I'd be more than happy to help you learn."
    >She seems almost surprised by your offer; it looks like the femme equine thought the subject was much too taboo to actively pursue.
    >"You're sure it won't be weird...?" she asks tentatively.
    "Only as weird as ya make it, silly," you tease, taking a few steps past her and running a finger along her jawline as you pass.
    "Come on to the bedroom, it's too cramped in here."
    >"O-okay Anon..."
 
lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)04:52 UTC-5 No.15886972
Replies: >>15887104
 
    >>15886727 #
    >Okay, Anon, don't screw this up.
    >You and your Equestrian compatriot head down the hallway to your bedroom, where you take a seat on the edge of the bed.
    "Hop on up, Lyra! Don't be shy, I'm the one with less covering than is customary."
    >That one was iffy, Anon, keep the pasta pocketed...
    >"Alright, if you say so..."
    >She sets herself next to you, eyes still flickering down to study your form (and making a very pitiful attempt at hiding it).
    >So, this is what it's like to get 'mired.
    >You'll probably end up posting this story on /fit/ later on.
    "Well, Lyra, here's what I'm thinking."
    >Here's to hoping that pony hooves don't hurt when they're examining your muscles.
    "I don't know what you might be looking for here, persay; I do know, however, that I will happily answer any questions you have about the human body."
    >She nods-- very slowly at first, but with a bit more speed over the span of a few seconds.
    >"Alright, Anon, I guess..."
    "I had been spending most of my time before you arrived making sure that my body was in good shape; I should be able to give a decent example for you to observe. Just make sure to keep everything professional, alright?"
    >Toss in a wink at the end, and you've officially had an alpha moment.
    >The blush on her face says that you've handled yourself pretty well.
    >"I don't... Oh, well, Anon, I... Alright, I guess," she stumbles.
    >You chance a glance beneath her to check for any stray noodles...
    >Looks like you're good.
    "Lyra, relax a bit. Let me walk you through it..."
    >You start by presenting her with your hand once again, reiterating the names you've already gone over.
    "The wiggling parts are fingers, the hard things on the end are fingernails, and they're attached to my hands, which are connected to my wrists followed by my forarms..."
    >After a few minutes of this style, Lyra relaxes considerably; she begins drinking in your information as you show her everything from the shape of your ears to the structure of your feet.
 
    (1/3)
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)05:10 UTC-5 No.15887104
Replies: >>15887133 >>15887254
 
    >>15886972 #
    >She even seems to begin enjoying herself; the availability of all sorts of pone art on the Net has given you much more than you might need to know about her body.
    >Although, by no means does that mean that you wouldn't want to get some firsthand exposure eventually...
    >But another time.
    >"Thank you so much, Anon! This is exactly what I was hoping for-- it's all so different, it's... Fascinating," she says, giving your arm a tiny nuzzle.
    >Tiny in size, but gigantic in cute.
    "No problem at all, Lyra. I'm glad I could be of assistance."
    >"You're a lot more than assistance, Anon; you've been nothing but saintly to me since I got here."
    >Another nuzzle, this one a bit more drawn out.
    >Score.
    "Come on, Lyra. It's getting late, and we haven't eaten yet."
    >Just then, her stomach makes a very loud gurgling sound as if to prove your point.
    >The two of you share a hearty laugh; you stand up with a smile on your face and give Lyra's mane a quick ruffle.
    "You're just the cutest thing I ever did see, you know that?"
    >"Oh, stop it, Anon..."
    >The grin and faint blush let on that she might not truly wish for you to stop.
    >
    >Having whipped together a set of Cesar salads (minus the chicken, of course) with milk for yourself and water for the equine, the pair of you sit together in the loveseat.
    >Lyra, through a highly embarrassed blush, suggested turning the cushion over; not only did that solve the problem, but you also managed to find a whole ten dollar bill underneath the polyester.
    >This sparked a conversation about currency, throughout which you explained the United States monetary system from both your limited knowledge and a few Google searches from your phone.
    >The use of your phone then led into a conversation about the Internet, which led to a very basic explanation of computer history.
    >You eventually just pulled up several Wikipedia tabs on your laptop and told Lyra to press the arrow keys with her magic to scroll.
    >Three hours later, she's still at it.
 
    (2/3)
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)05:28 UTC-5 No.15887254
Replies: >>15887277 >>15887281
 
    >>15887104 #
    >All the reading, interspersed with the occasional question or request to search up a different article, has given you a lot of time to think about your situation.
    >For one thing, you've decided that Lyra will simply have to stay put when you leave for work in the morning (now only eight hours away-- it's eleven o clock already).
    >Your plan is to make her a Skype account, which you'll sign in on your laptop before you leave.
    >You'll be able to call her any time from your phone, either with video or just audio, and she could hear the alert from anywhere in the apartment.
    >You've also decided to ask her what kinds of groceries she'd like for you to pick up.
    >You will have to take the fact that you're now buying for two into account when you account for your accounts, but you guess from the surplus you have each month that you should be able to handle it just fine.
    >"Hey, Anon...?"
    >You glance up, taken from your reverie by the cutie's words.
    "Yeah, Lyra?"
    >"I'm getting kind of tired," she confesses, leaning over in her seat to rest her head against your shoulder. "Do you have any plans for how we're to sleep tonight...?
    "Together, of course!"
    >You suppose that you'll be taking the floor like last night, and setting Lyra up in your bed and did you or did you not just suggest sleeping together aloud?
    >Lyra's surprised and mildly amused expression declare that you, in fact, did.
    >"Well, I wouldn't want to make you sleep on the floor again in your own home..."
    >What...
    >No way.
    >No
    >Fucking
    >Way
    >"As long as I can trust you not to try any funny business? I wouldn't mind, Anon."
    >Now it's Lyra's turn to wink, and she hops off the loveseat and pads to the bedroom.
    "Oh, Hell yes."
    >Five minutes later, and you and your pony pal are under the same set of sheets.
    >Lyra yawns and turns onto her side, facing you.
    >"I'm actually really tired... Goodnight, Anon."
    >She blows you a kiss and closes her eyes.
    "...Goodnight, Lyra."
    >See you in the morning, Princess.
 
 
________________________________________
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/25/14(Sat)23:45 UTC-5 No.15909611
Replies: >>15909749 >>15909815 >>15910091
 
    >>15908835 #
 
    >"..."
    >Something is missing.
    >"..."
    >Something familiar, actually; some kind of... something.
    >"..."
    >A something-like something of something, like a...
    >"..."
    >Something.
    >But you should be getting ready for work instead of worrying about what this somethi--
    "SON OF A BITCH!"
    >The turquoise-colored hoof cracking into your forehead acts as an unorthodox replacement for the alarm clock you had smashed the morning before.
    >A few seconds of spinning stars pass, and then:
    >"Ohmigosh, Anon, I'm zo zorreey..."
    >After you rub the sleep out from your eyes, you feel the upper portions of your face for any possible dents caused by Lyra's panicponipunch.
    >You satisfy yourself that you've not been concussed and finally open your eyes.
    "Isn't that something..."
    >Though the circumstances aren't quite what you had always imagined, the fact of the matter is that you just woke up gazing into the eyes of mother-fucking Lyra Heartstrings.
    >There might not be stains on your bed, but to be honest?
    >You're still happy with it this way.
    >Not to mention that her sleepy-voice is adorable as hell.
    >"Are you awwright, Anon...?"
    >You're not even entirely sure if she's awake right now or not.
    "Yeah, Lyra, I'm fine, don't worry about it."
    >She's just too fucking cute, Anon, you know that?
    >You reach over and grab your phone from the bedside table, checking the time.
    >Five forty-five am, right when your alarm would have been set had it not been shattered on the floor.
    >'Dat biological clock, nigguh
    >You strip the sheets above your body, standing up to stretch; your shoulders both give a satisfying "crack" with a bit of effort.
    >"Jeez, Anon, you need a massage or something," Lyra murmurs from her side of the bed.
    >Only a chuckle escapes from your lips as you habitually begin to strip for your morning shower.
    >A good twenty or thirty seconds pass before you realize what's just happened.
    >You turn around, finding two very wide pony eyes staring you down as you had feared.
 
    (1/?)
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)00:08 UTC-5 No.15910091
Replies: >>15910163 >>15910218 >>15910598
 
    >>15909611 #
    "Oh, shoot, Lyra--!"
    >It's pretty obvious that your pockets would be spilling pasta sauce at this point if were you wearing any pants.
    >"Oh, shoot, Anon--"
    >Lyra is STILL staring at your nude form, her jaw slightly agape.
    >"Wait a second... Oh, right!"
    >She dives her head under the blankets in embarrassment, the shock having worn off enough to give way to a sense of social cognition.
    >"Anon, your parts are showing..."
    "Damnit, Lyra, I'm so sorry, it's force of habit..."
    >Fuck.
    >You always take a shower on the mornings you work; it's been that way for the four and a half years you've had this job.
    >Who would've guessed that the one time you have a female in your bed, getting naked would be one of the worst options available?
    >"Anon, cover yourself up or something already..."
    >Wow.
    >She sounds kind of...
    >Angry?
    >Definitely somehow upset.
    >Good fucking work, Anon; things had been going so wonderfully yesterday...
    "Right, right, sorry!"
    >Within a half of a minute your shower is running on full blast.
    >The hot water runs down your muscles, and as it always does, brings the anxiety and worries of your recent days off of your body along with the dirt and grime.
    >You lean your head back, taking a small step forward to let the warmth run down both your front and back together.
    >"An... Anon?"
    >She's calling you through the door.
    "Yeah?"
    >"I need to use the bathroom..."
    >Sonofabitch, you just can NOT win today, Anon.
    >And it's not even six in the morning yet.
    "Uhm, I could be a little while... Will you be alright?"
    >"After yesterday, Anon? Can we just... Not go there?"
    >Really sensitive of you, faggot.
    "Oh, no, I'm sorry... Ummmmmm..."
    >Think, Anon, think...
    >Welp, there are only so many ways you can have to different beings piss and shower in the same room at the same time.
    >And as most of them involve either A) time travel or B) inter-dimensional warping, and because you have no desire to summon a level six Duskbreaker Demon...
    >Only one option remains.
 
    (2/?)
 
lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)00:34 UTC-5 No.15910598
Replies: >>15910638 >>15910687
 
    >>15910091 #
    >It looks like you'll have to share a bathroom for a bit.
    "Okay, Lyra? I'm going to unlock the door, just come on in and do what you've gotta do. There's a curtain on my shower, so no worries."
    >Thank God that you don't have a fetish for watersports.
    >But, then again, you've never tried it...
    >And this whole situation is a little bit kinky, so--
    "No, no, stop it."
    >You talk aloud to yourself, adding to this incentive a twist of your own nipple.
    >Why would you give yourself a titty twister for the sake of not developing a watersport fetish at this time?
    >A simple explanation, really, which would fit here wonderfully if Lyra were not calling your name through the door.
    >"Anon? Anon, are you okay?"
    "What? Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just got... distracted."
    >You begin to wonder if there is such a thing as an "autisometer", something with which one might measure social autism.
    >"I said that would be fine, but you still haven't unlocked the door..."
    >Her voice rings with an air of suspicion and wariness.
    >Clearly you're weirding her the fuck out, Anon.
    >And now she's about to be sharing a bathroom with you?
    "Fuck me..."
    >"What was that?"
    "Nothing!"
    >You reach around the curtain and pull the latch-lock into the unlocked position.
    >Before you have the chance to open the door, however, it swings inward of its own accord.
    >Of course, it becomes apparent within a few seconds that the door hasn't moved on its own.
    >Rather, Lyra has figured out how to turn the handle with her magic.
    >The spaghetti in the room runs rampant as she briskly enters, her eyes locked onto the floor.
    >Neither of you say a word as she crosses to the toilet on the far side of the room.
    >Though the curtain is a solid pale blue, you're able to see if you peep through the space between the wall and hanging barrier.
    >Well, it looks like her knack for sitting human-style has an additional use you hadn't yet thought of.
    >
    >Godammit, Anon, don't listen. Don't listen, and don't watch...
 
    (3/?)
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)17:55 UTC-5 No.15925076
Replies: >>15925094 >>15925283
 
    >>15910598 #
    >Rushed by the awkwardness of the situation, you skip the usual life-contemplation that takes place in your showers and finish your business within a few minutes.
    >It doesn't take nearly that long for Lyra to wrap up her own activities, and once you hear the flushing mechanism go to work you figure that a quick peek wouldn't hurt.
    >Congrats, Anon.
    >You can now kick "checking out pony vag" off of your bucket list, getting an eyeful as she hops up onto the counter to gain access to the sink.
    >The ensuing rush of blood from your head to your head, along with the knowledge that you've just broken any semblance of privacy that Lyra might have, causes you to quickly pinch the peeking-gap closed.
    >It only takes a second or two for Lyra to speak.
    >"Anon, were you just... Were you looking at me?"
    >You unpinch the curtain for a second, peering around it to see a very red poniface.
    "What? No, of course not, I wouldn't ever--"
    >"YOU SICK PERVERT!"
    >Looks like she was red from anger rather than embarrassment.
    >Lyrepone throws the door open with her magic and flees, leaving the water running.
    >Goddammit, Anon, you candle-wasting ignoramus, how can you possibly fuck up this often?
    >It's borderline unrealistic!
    >...
    >FUCK THAT'S HOT
    >Since you were so distracted by the awkwardness with Lyra, you managed to completely ignore that the toilet takes up most of the cold water in the pipes when it flushes.
    >You smash your head on the side of the stall in an attempt to bend low enough to reach the water controls, throwing the valves shut in rage and pain.
    >The impact completely shuts off your vision and you stumble around, banging several toes on the sides of the stall and knocking the soap off of its little shelf.
    >Naturally, Murphy's Law is fucking your shit over and it lands on your freshly smashed foot.
    "GODDAMN MOTHER FUCK!!"
 
    1/?
 
>>
lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)17:56 UTC-5 No.15925094
Replies: >>15925139
 
    >>15925076 #
    >You've managed to collect both yourself and your spaghetti as you enter your bedroom again.
    >Lyra is nowhere to be found, as expected.
    >Despite your desire to try and patch things up with your hoofed friend, duty calls; you'll have to leave for work within the hour.
    >By the time you've dressed yourself for work (A navy blue shirt, khakis, black hard-soled shoes, and your navy peaked cap), you've decided on a plan of action.
    >You grab the old notebook from your failed run-in with some /x/ophiles out of your bedside table and tear out a page.
 
    "Lyra,
    I can't apologize enough for my actions this morning. I'm not
    the smartest man on the planet, and I've gone and screwed up
    yet again. I'll find a way to make it up you somehow. But, currently,
    I have to go to work. Last night I set up my laptop for you.
    The mouse is already where it needs to be; all you have to do
    is click the cursor and you'll be put on a direct line to me.
    I might call you, too, in which case you just have to hit the
    "enter" key to answer. As much as you know I'd love to talk
    to you the whole day, I can't always answer at work. So if you
    do call me, make sure that there's something really important,
    okay?
 
    Again, I'm sorry for my ineptitude... I'll do my best to work
    things out as soon as I can. I've got plenty of books in the den,
    the games and movies are still sitting out where we left them. Try
    to have some fun while I'm gone.
 
    -Anonymous
 
>>
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)17:58 UTC-5 No.15925139
Replies: >>15925609
 
    >>15925094 #
    >Satisfied with your note, you give one last look around the apartment in hopes of catching the wisp of a tail around a corner.
    >Lyra is still nowhere to be found.
    >When you set the note on the bed, you realise that your pone might not come in here to see it.
    "LYRA," you call out, "THERE'S A NOTE FOR YOU ON THE TABLE! I'VE GOTTA GO TO WORK, SO I'LL SEE YOU LATER TONIGHT! BYE!"
    >One sigh later, you make your way out of the apartment with the door double-locked behind you.
    >The drive to work in your jet black 95 Camaro with T-tops takes about eleven minutes, getting you there at about 7:17.
    >Your shift begins at 7:30, so you've got a bit of time to think about how you might patch things up with Lyra.
    >What do you even really know about her, anyway?
    >A quick scan of your mental inventory reveals that you truthfully don't know much.
    >The show revealed very little, as Lyra was only depicted as a background pony.
    >There are about a thousand or so different fanfictions written about her, and they're all so diverse that there's no way you could garner any real information from them.
    >And you haven't picked up any personal details from the conversation you've shared thus far.
    >Jeez, Anon, you're quite the insensitive jerk.
    >You wrack your brains for a few minutes more, until the time comes to begin your day's labors.
    >You take a seat at your desk, take the paperwork from your "in" tray, and set yourself to work.
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 01/26/14(Sun)18:22 UTC-5 No.15925609
Replies: >>15925709 >>15926286 >>15930427
 
    >>15925139 #
    >The manilla folder smacking down onto your desk snaps you from the humdrum of the debriefing papers.
    >"Next case, Anonymous. Got a stiff in a pawn shop downtown, looks like a robbery turned murder. Better get on it."
    >Shit, just what you needed right now.
    >Working as a 3rd-grade detective, you spend most of your time shuffling papers.
    >Normally the chance to work a homicide alone would be welcomed, even worthy of a night of celebration.
    >But the business going on at home makes it difficult to spend all of your time solving mysteries and such.
    >You open up the file and inspect the contents with a shrug.
    >Within twenty minutes, you're in your car on the way to the "Rook Takes Pawn Shop".
    >
    >To be honest, there's not much to say for the little shop.
    >As far as the shops lining the sidestreets of downtown go, it's quite clean and friendly-looking; however, compared to the pawn shops in the county and on the larger roads, it's rather small and the merchandise seems a bit lackluster.
    >According to your file, the dead man in question is about twenty four years old and very overweight.
    >The odd thing is that the cadaver hasn't yet been identified; it would seem that neither his fingerprints nor his dental records are on file in the state records.
    >You share a few words with the shop owners, an older woman and her two sons.
    >One of the sons had been working the counter at the time, and you sit him down in the back room to go over the basics.
    >He informs you that the deceased entered the store looking for some old computer parts, which weren't to be found.
    >The victim was still standing at the counter when the robber walked in.
    >The next bit of information catches your attention, however; something seems amiss.
    >The robber walked in, approached the shopper from behind, shot him in the head, paused, and turned to walk out.
    >He then stopped, turned back around, and demanded all of the money from the register.
    >You thank the man and go to inspect the corpse.
 
Lyra Sauce  lyrafag Sun Jan 26 21:55:26 2014 No.15930427
File: 49 KB, 640x960, 1390791313747.jpg
15930427
Quoted by: >>15930640 >>15930648 >>15932888 >>15932998
 
    >>15925609
    >The body is still laying where the first response team left it, covered in the usual sheets as mandated by police protocols.
    >You set your briefcase down on the counter and pull out the casefile, looking for the doc's analysis.
    >The time of death was about 8:43 AM, caused by two gunshot wounds to the back.
    >One pierced the victim's lung, the other got him right in the heart.
    >You bend down and fold back the sheets, about to inspect the body for any evidence that the street officers might have missed.
    "Holy fucking shit."
    >You know this face.
    >Looking at the evidence, it should have been obvious when you first entered the room.
    >You're supposed to be a detective, Anon; why the hell couldn't you have picked up on this?
    >Everything is sitting right here in front of you.
    >Hell, you could have picked up on it before you even saw the interior of the store.
    "There's no way there isn't some connection."
    >And it truly is obvious...
    >The crushed fedora next to the body.
    >The blood-stained sleeves of an obnoxious trenchcoat spilling out from underneath the blankets.
    >The faint scent of Cheeto-dust, sweat, and social autism permeating the air.
    "It's the goddamn OP."
    >"What...?"
    >You wave off the question, muttering "it's nothing" softly.
    >Sonofabitch, the fucker's dead.
    >And judging from the situation described by the guy running the desk, it wasn't exactly a random occurrence.
    >Though you'll have to look at the security footage to be sure, it seems like this robbery-turned-murder is really a murder-turned-robbery.
    >Completely baffled by all of this, you go to ask the store owner for access to the security tapes when you feel your phone vibrate.
    >It's your Skype application.
    >pic related
    "Oh... Shit."
    >You dash into the back room, locking yourself into a closet and flipping the light on.
    >You slide the little bar to answer the call, and after a second, Lyra's adorable face appears in your screen.
    >Her adorable, tear-streaked face.
 
Lyra Sauce  lyrafag Sun Jan 26 23:48:20 2014 No.15932998
Quoted by: >>15933054 >>15933192 >>15933409
 
    >>15930427
    >Never have you been so thankful for a good-quality video feed.
    >You step backwards a bit in order to let the light better illuminate your face, therefore bettering Lyra's image of you.
    "Lyra? Lyra, what's wrong?"
    >"A-Anon, I'm so sorry... I know you said to call only if there was something really serious, and I know that it's nothing, but I just c-couldn't..."
    >Her already disfigured speech dissolves into sobs.
    >You can feel your heart melting for her, dissolving into a pool of raw emotion.
    >You haven't even known her for three whole days, and she's already shown you what it feels like to have someone you truly care about hurt.
    >And it's your goddamn fault, Anon.
    >Keep that in mind while she suffers.
    "Lyra, listen to me. It's okay, it's all okay, it will all be--"
    >"No, it won't, Anon! It will never be okay again, nothing will be..."
    "No, Lyra, please. Just list--"
    >"No, Anon, YOU listen!"
    >She's cut you off twice in that many attempts to speak, and now this?
    "...Alright, Lyra. I'm listening."
    >Her eyes still shimmering and shining, she chokes out:
    >"I'm going crazy, Anon. I've never felt this horrible before in my life. You've been great to me, done nothing to hurt me and never tried to bring me harm. But Anon, I want to go /home/. I miss my friends, I miss my life! I miss getting up in the morning and leaving my house, working for Her Majesty to be there should Princess Sparkle ever need me. I miss spending time with Bon Bon, I miss all the Cakes' creations... I miss my music, Anon. The music I made and the music of my life."
    >Anon, you sick fuck.
    >YOU DID THIS.
    "Lyra, I'm--"
    >"But Anon, I'm sitting here begging for Celestia to bring me home, but I just... My heart isn't in it, Anon. There's something keeping me here, and I'm so torn, it's killing me... I can't deal with it anymore, Anon, I'm panicking and I'm scared and I just..."
    >Sobs again.
    >You need to get home, Anon.
    >Fast.
 
lyrafag Mon Jan 27 00:08:29 2014 No.15933409
Quoted by: >>15933513 >>15933535 >>15933554 >>15933557 >>15933690 >>15933720
 
    >>15932998
    Missed trips by one. Fuck.
 
    "Listen, Lyra? I'll be home in twenty minutes. I'm on my way right now, I'll be here talking to you the whole time. Okay?"
    >#This is your fault, Anon.#
    >"O-okay..."
    >You bust out of the closet and run right into the store's owner.
    "Shit, sorry, I've got to get going. Family emergency, but just send the security footage back with the PD."
    >Without waiting for a reply, you go flying to the door.
    >#It's all your fault.#
    >You have one hand on the bar mechanism when something catches your eye on the shelf next to the door.
    "Lyra, don't go anywhere. My phone is going into my pocket, but I'll have it out in just a second."
    >#You selfish, inconsiderate waste of space.#
    >Four minutes later, you're repeating the "It's alright" lines to Lyra with a large bag in the passenger seat of your car.
    >The traffic feels like it couldn't possibly be any worse.
    >#You had the chance to go to Equestria and everyone could be happy, and you blew it.#
    "I'm almost home, Lyra. Nine minutes."
    >You nearly T-bone a pickup truck as you veer hard to the left with no regard for the stop sign behind you.
    >#You had to go an bring her here, all because you wanted to get her into your bed.#
    >You turn onto your street, the tail end of your car sliding out and narrowly avoiding the Smart Car in the opposite lane.
    >#Is your goddamn libido more important than the happiness of anyone else, much less Lyra Heartstrings herself?#
    >You're sprinting up the stairs.
    >Lyra has already hung up.
    >#You really should have picked the sexless option; it would be a crime for anything as disgusting and loathsome as you to breed.#
    >It takes almost a minute to finally grasp it from the inside of your coat and to unlock the door.
    >#You ruined her life, and nothing you can ever do will make it better.#
    >#You've doomed the picture of perfection to a life of misery and pain.#
    >#The sooner you curl up with an empty pill bottle and die, the better.
    >Finally, you're inside.
 
Lyra Sauce  lyrafag Mon Jan 27 00:22:04 2014 No.15933720
Quoted by: >>15933788 >>15933795 >>15933807 >>15933820 >>15933928 >>15933946 >>15933948
 
    >>15933409
    >You've never yelled so loudly before in your life.
    "LYRA!!"
    >You're screaming her name, tearing the place apart in search of your equine charge.
    >#Are you ashamed, Anon?#
    "LYRA!?"
    >She's not in your bedroom or the den.
    >#Do you now feel the impact of what your selfish lust has done?#
    "Lyra...!"
    >Your voice is cracking, your mind reeling through the unmentionable possibilities of what could have happened to her.
    >If OP died this morning from murder, who's to say that you and Lyra aren't next?
    >#It wouldn't matter even if you were targets; you've already killed her.#
    >You don't even have the stability left to cry as you check the bathroom.
    >She should have said something by now.
    >#You killed her when you brought her here; she couldn't have ever truly lived in your world.#
    >#Much less with a miserable sack of ineptitude like you.#
    >You stumble into the kitchen, where the most horrifying sight of your life bashes you in the face.
    >#See?#
    >#You really have killed her.#
    >Lyra turns over her shoulder to look at you, her face filled with an emotional expression for which words simply do not exist.
    >"Good-bye, Anon."
    >She steps forward, out the kitchen window eight stories up.
 
Lyra Sauce  lyrafag Mon Jan 27 00:31:24 2014 No.15933946
Quoted by: >>15933988 >>15934004 >>15934018 >>15934066 >>15934117
 
    >>15933720
 
    >You started sprinting the second your mind detected her distinct turquoise coat.
 
    >#Selfish
 
    >You reached out as she finished speaking.
 
    >#Worthless#
 
    >You hit the windowsill as she finished stepping.
 
    >#Hopeless#
 
    >Your hand clasped around her hoof before she started falling.
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 02/04/14(Tue)17:20 UTC-5 No.16106323
Replies: >>16106489 >>16107183
 
>>16091576
 
>It's been three days since Lyra's Skype call to you at work.
>You had held her close to you for what felt like hours, ignoring both your phone and several knocks at your door.
>Nothing could have meant more to you at that time than consoling the mess of pone sobbing in your arms.
>And console you did; you gave her a pair of your old anxiety pills and whispered sweet nothings to her until she fell asleep.
>You carried her to bed and immediately called your supervisor to apologize.
>Surprisingly enough, she was very understanding of your "Niece tried to kill herself" story; you got the impression that you'd struck a chord and managed to convince her to pull you off the case.
>You even got two week's paid vacation to stay with your "niece", a nice convenience given the current situation.
>After then fixing up the little things left awry by your sudden flight from the pawn shop (calling and apologizing to the store owner, moving your car into its proper place down below, and stowing the package in the top of a closet), you sat yourself down to try and comprehend the insane and shitty fanfic that your once boring life has become.
>
>Lyra has remained in bed almost exclusively since the events of three days ago.
>She's gotten up to use the bathroom and, on two occasions, to ask for more medication.
>Though you did give it to her, you can't help but assume that her growing dependence on them is a bad sign.
>She hasn't eaten since the incident, either, though she's taken water.
>With all of your extra free time, you've decided to get back onto /mlp/ and check the old thread for some more information.
>It worked in your case for some crazy-ass reason, so who's to say that it hadn't worked for someone else?
"Shit... That's a lot of thread."
>They're on the seventh part at this point, with a shitload of greentext stories about every pony under the sun.
>With a shrug and a timecheck (11:15 am), you begin typing.
 
">"Option 2, huh?"
>The figure opposite...
 
lyrafag 02/04/14(Tue)18:19 UTC-5 No.16107183
Replies: >>16107199
 
>>16106323
>
>Several hours tick by as you relay the tale of your misadventures with the board.
>You join up an IRC chat with some of the other writers, noting that another anon had gone very meta in his own writing and done the same.
>By the time you've caught your story up with the present, the time is once again 11:15; this time, however, the sky is draped in the inky blue hues of night.
"Shit... Twelve hours to the dot. Goddamn."
>"'Goddamn' what, Anonymous?"
>The familiar sound of Lyra's voice gives you a start, but the more surprising bit is that she's called you by your full name rather than the short one.
"Nothing, Lyra; I've just been here all day, is all."
>The feminequine sighs and approaches, pausing in front of your loveseat.
>"You... You don't mind if I sit down, do you?"
"Of course I don't, Lyra."
>You scoot over a bit and the small mammal hops up onto the sitting apparatus with you.
>Rather than lean into you as she has before, however, she's opted to remain statuesque and refrain from initiating any contact.
>With everything that's gone on, you really don't know what to say.
>In fact, with everything that's gone on since everything that went on, you've been spending almost no time with her.
>It may be true that she made no attempt to spend any time with you, either, but you didn't even ONCE ask how she was or if she wanted to talk about anything.
>Anon, you're a fucking idiot.
>You know that?
>"Anonymous, I wanted to thank you."
"...What for, Lyra?"
>She emits a tiny gasp of disbelief.
>"For everything, Anon! You've been so good to me, and then what happened the other day... You literally saved my life, Anonymous. And now, since it's happened? I've just wanted to be alone for a while, and you were really sweet about that; most ponies I know would have been all over me trying to just /make/ me feel better."
>The way she emphasizes the word "make" gives you the thought that your little Lyra might have dealt with something like this before.
 
(1/3)
 
>>
lyrafag 02/04/14(Tue)18:20 UTC-5 No.16107199
Replies: >>16107244 >>16107925
 
>>16107183
"Well, I mean, I--"
>She cuts you off, now shifting her gaze from you to several random points in the room and back again in her speech.
>"And I just want you to know how thankful I am to have been brought to someone like you, Anonymous. I've been laying around like a box of broken harp strings, while you've been out here dealing with all of the trouble I've caused. And you don't complain, you don't guilt me, you don't do anything other than be so perfect..."
>Jeez, flattery much?
"I wouldn't say anything like that, Ly--"
>"And I just don't have any idea how someone as sweet and caring as you could even exist anymore after everything that's happened, and I missed my home so much. But at the same time I really do like being here with you, and that made me mad because there's no way I should want to stay. But a part of me does, and it's all so confusing and painful, I just..."
>At this point, you're beginning to gain an idea of why it is Lyra burst into tears when the parasprites pastryjacked her.
>Rather than bury her head in your shoulder and to renew your shirt's salt content, however, the horned horse has smashed her eyes shut and bitten her lip.
>Staring at her profile, you try and think of the words that could calm the situation.
>They do come, but not from you.
>"I'm sorry for the rambling, Anonymous. I know you're busy, and I'll let you get back to work. But I just came in here to say..."
>She pauses, obviously fighting back a collossal wave of tears.
>"What I'm trying to say is that... I'm sorry. I'm sorry for acting out so badly, I'm sorry for being so neglectful, I'm sorry that I even came here to burden you with--"
>Now it's Lyra's turn to be cut off as you throw your arms around her, your laptop clattering to the floor.
"Don't you ever say that."
 
(2/3)
 
>>
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 02/04/14(Tue)18:22 UTC-5 No.16107244
Replies: >>16107350 >>16107925
 
>>16107199
>It's begun raining in your little den.
"Don't you ever apologize to me for that, Lyra. You coming here is the best thing that's ever happened to me. I've told you before, I'll tell you now, and I will always believe that you are the single greatest thing to ever happen in my life."
>And it's true.
"You've given me something to work for, a reason to wake up in the morning and a reason to come home. You've reminded me of what it's like to share things with another per-- ...Another being. And..."
>You faggot, don't you dare fucking say it.
"You've given me somebody to love."
>It doesn't matter if it's true, quoting Queen at a time like this is fucking plebby as shit. She's gonna laugh in your face now.
>But physically hearing and feeling Lyra's gasp, followed by the sensation of having pony legs attempt to squeeze you into oblivion, invoke the feeling that she won't be laughing at you any time soon.
>"Anon, I... Do... Do you..."
>You manage to tear yourself away from her intense embrace, putting your forehead onto hers and locking your stare with hers.
"I do love you, Lyra."
>The most intense moment of silence you've ever felt in your life, and then:
>Lyra pushes her jaw forward, connecting her lips with yours in the first kiss you've had in years.
 
(3/3)
Things will be moving along more quickly now that I'm back in the swing of the story. Critique me, faggots. I know the first of the four posts wasn't nearly as good as I've set my standards, but bear with me.
 
Lyra Sauce lyrafag 02/11/14(Tue)21:15 UTC-5 No.16241929
Replies: >>16242676 >>16248461 >>16249259
 
>>16241892
 
>It only takes a second or two for Lyra to pull away.
>Her bottom lip has slipped between her teeth, and the bright turquoise eyelids uncover and re-cover her irises a few times.
>While the hot red tinge of her cheeks does imply an active sympathetic nervous system, it couldn't possibly compare to the blitzkrieg your own body is currently enacting.
>You had felt like you had loved your little waifu for quite some time, but looking back? You know very well that such aesthetic affections amounted to nothing more than a mild infatuation.
>You hadn't known her then.
>You hadn't felt her hooves pulling you ever closer to her, you hadn't stroked her mane through her tears.
>And you most certainly hadn't kissed her.
>In fact, you still haven't kissed Lyra; SHE has kissed YOU.
>Think about that for a second, Anonymous.
>That wasn't a ">rape" moment, that was a feeling of intimacy brought to full flush by a kiss which SHE initiated.
>Hot damn, Anon, you little player you!
>But by the time you've finished contemplating all of this, it would appear that Lyra has already moved on to the "awkward moment afterward" phase.
>"A-Anon...?"
>All of this spaghetti has to be coming from someplace, right?
"Lyra?"
>"I'm... I'm sorry, Anon. I didn't... I don't know what came over me, I just..."
"No, it's okay, really, I don't mind! I've just never really been kissed before, and you're not exactly my species, and--"
>"Goddammit, Anon, I'm SO sorry! It's weird, it's probably wrong, I didn't mean to try and... Oh, gosh..."
>Hey, she picked up a human curse.
>But now's not the time to be considering that, now is it, Anon?
"No, Lyra, really! It's--"
>She's pulled away from you, and is currently burying her face into her hooves.
>You fight off the ADHD-induced urge to right your fallen laptop, and think.
 
I really feel like incorporating more reader-based plot formation. I keep trying to plan ahead, and it's just not as fun. Therefore: Wat do, /mlp/? She's all flipping out.