Title:           Coke Pone stories
Author:          FrankHogs555
Pastebin link:   http://pastebin.com/PuWBUhU9
First Edit:      Monday 14th of April 2014 11:38:03 AM CDT
Last Edit:       Monday 14th of April 2014 11:38:03 AM CDT

Domino !!neppuKEQytO Coke Pony one shots http://pastebin.com/Jf88Zr5s
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/13/14(Sun)01:05 UTC-4 No.17242607
File: 1397365541697.jpg-(31 KB, 234x313, i have no idea.jpg)
>you are at home, relaxing
>you get hungry, so you decide to grab a snack from the kitchen
>you open up the fridge to see what options you have
>one sticks out more than anything else
>a pony
>she's laying on her back looking at you
>you notice the fluid inside her body
>it swishes around as her she adjusts herself
>she smiles at you
>"Hi!"
"Uh, hi?"
>"My name's Coca Cola, but you can call me Coke if you'd like. What's your name?"
>you give her a blank stare
"Anonymous, but I go by Anon most of the time."
>"It's really nice to meet..."
"What the hell are you doing in my fridge?"
>"Oh, about that."
>she looks at herself, then back at you
>"I hope you don't mind, but it's really nice in here."
>she gives a light giggle
"I'm...glad?"
>"I should probably get out, huh?"
"I'd appreciate it."
>she crawls out
>the fluid inside her shifts from her head down to her hooves
>it starts to fizz up
>"Whoa. Getting light headed..."
>she lets out a huge, deep, burp
>she gives her head a shake
>"There. I think I'm better."
>she looks at you with her head slightly tilted, and gives you a smile
 
Continue? Also, ideas for stuff to write about?
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/13/14(Sun)03:16 UTC-4 No.17244621
>>17242607
 
>"So. What now?"
"Well, I was planning on getting something to eat."
>"Oh, that sounds nice."
>she turns around facing the fridge, and walks up to it
>she stands up while leaning on the fridge
>she opens the freezer portion, and grabs the ice tray with her mouth
>she sets it on the counter
>she then jumps on the counter rooting around in the cabinets
Just make yourself at home, why don't you?
>after a couple minutes of searching, she finds what she's looking for
>she pulls a small bowl from the counter
>she takes the tray over the bowl and dumps the ice cubes in them.
>sh starts munching on the ice
"Did I say you could have that?"
>she sighs
>"Fine. May I have this ice?"
>you look her straight-faced
"No."
>her mouth drops in slight shock
>you walk past her to the fridge, and start looking around for what you may want
>you decide on a sandwich
>you grab the materials you need
>when you close the door, you see Coke pouting
>you turn away
>you start smiling
"Well, I guess I could let..."
>you hear the clacking of hooves
>the weight of a small being crashes against you
>a sharp cold hits you as she puts her foreleg against the back of your neck
"Ah-hah-hah. I-was-kidding-I-was-kidding-I-was-kidding."
>you feel her get off you
>you look back at her
>she has this smug look of victory on her face
>"Thank you, Anon. That is very kind and hospitable of you."
>you get up
"I know. The lady's really love me."
>she starts happily munching at the ice again
>you make your sandwich and start doing the same
>a couple bites in, and you notice she's licking the bowl clean
>she puts it in the sink then starts walking out of the kitchen
>"Thanks, Anon."
>she let's out a burp
>"Really good."
"Uh huh. No problem."
>you stand leaning against the cabinet, finishing your sandwich
Why did I let her get away with that?
It's because she's hot...or cold, or whatever
>you hear her fiddling around in your living
"What are you doing?"
 
>>17243755
>mentos
I'm fucking stealing this
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)14:27 UTC-4 No.17250038
>Be Anon
>Go to store
>Buy a pack of Mentos for yourself
>Later, be leaning against a tree, eating them
>Coke Pony's sister Diet Coke comes along
>"What's that?"
Mentos. They're good, want one?
>"Sure!"
>Hand a Mento to Diet Coke
>She pops it in her mouth
 
>Ten seconds later, diet coke fountains are pouring from her anus, vajayjay, mouth, nostrils, ears, and tear ducts
>Get soaked in Diet Coke "blood"
>After this subsides, a very spent-looking Diet is lying on the ground
>"Aaagh... my... everything..."
"...Remind me never to give you or your sister Mentos."
>"Yeah... will do... aaagh..."
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)14:53 UTC-4 No.17250414
>>17250038
>what you interpreted as pain was actually her recovering from a mind-shattering orgasm
>she becomes a mentos addict shortly after this incident
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)17:25 UTC-4 No.17252673
>>17250414
>diet coke starts abusing Mentos in the bathtub to hide the massive hemorrhaging that occurs
>she does this almost daily
>you come home one day to find her with a empty with a glazed look on her face.
>along with several empty packets of Mentos scattered across the floor
>call 911 to see if you can get any help
>quickly figure out doctors and veterinarians can't do shit for magically animated coke bottles
>call Coca-Cola bottling plant for help
>eventually they agree to send a technician after extended negotiations
>get billed 100$ just for the fat fuck to shake out the depleted Mentos and unceremoniously pour some more diet coke in her
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)20:31 UTC-4 No.17255953
>>17252673
>the lard-ass leaves
>you stare at the still catatonic Diet-Coke
>you stand her up on her hooves but she just stands there
>still as a statue
>still as the grave
>Coca-Cola comes in and puts a hoof to her mouth to suppress a gasp
>you hug her to help reduce some of the shock at seeing her sister like this
>her freezing cold hooves feel like a tray of ice-cubes to the spine but just this once you don't mind
>you spend the whole day trying to both reassure Coke that her sister is going to be fine and reassure yourself that you've done all you can
>the day crawls on and Coke just can't stop lamenting over the fact she should have known
>but soon enough you have to put her back into the fridge and get to bed yourself
>that night you hear sloshing as something climbs into your bed
>"Anon"
>"I'm sorry"
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)21:38 UTC-4 No.17257095
>>17256641
>>17256700
IT SHALL BE DONE
>>17255953
>In the morning you look for some form of rehab you can get diet-coke into
>unsurprisingly, most rehabs won't animated plastic/soda constructs addicted to after-dinner mints
>coca-cola dotes on diet Coke, but you know that she's probably hurting on the inside
>she probably blames herself for this
>in a fit of desperation, you call the coca-cola bottling plant again
>turns out they do have a in-house therapist for just so an occasion
>you tell them to send him over right away
>you stick with coke and diet coke and tell them its going to be all right
>you hear someone pull up in front of your house
>oh goddamn it, it's the fat guy again
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/13/14(Sun)21:41 UTC-4 No.17257135
>>17244621
 
>"You have videogames in here!"
"Are you wanting to play one?"
>"DUH!"
>more rooting around
>you stuff down your sandwich
>you walk into your living room
>"This one looks interesting!"
>she flashes a game to you
>Call of Duty: World at War
Damn. Been a long time since I've seen that
"You know what? Sure. We can play that."
>"Awesome!"
>you take the game, and pop it into your console
>you grab an extra controller, and hand it to Coke
>she takes it and sets it on the ground
"You sure you want to do this? I mean, the controller isn't exactly designed for hooves
>"Pfft. I got this."
"Alright."
>the game starts up
>you hop over to the zombies menu
>you start up a match
>the game loads
>"Alright, just let me get the controls..."
>she starts fidgeting with the buttons, hitting them all with little problem
>you look over at her
>she notices
>"What?"
"How the hell do you do that?"
>she shrugs her shoulders
>"I unno."
"Whatever."
>you two start playing
>she's obviously unfamiliar, but she's picking up quickly
>"You're beating me?"
>you look at the score
>you have more than twice the points she does
>you look at her smugly
"It seems so."
>"Well then, that needs to change."
"Oh yeah. Whatcha gon' do bout it?"
>she leans over to you and licks the side of your head
"You really think that's going to..."
>her spit dries, and your hair gets all sticky
"What the hell?"
>"What? Never had pop get in your hair?"
"Oh, that's dirty."
>"Not as dirty as you."
>she gives you another lick, this time on the cheek
>your face starts to feel sticky
"Do you really think this is going to distract me?"
>out of the corner of your eye, you see her head go back and forth from the TV to searching around the room
"What are you doing?"
>"Oh, nothing."
>she leans over and grabs a familiar rectangle
>it's your laptop
>you hear the sound of her preparing a lugi
"You. Wouldn't. Fucking. Dare."
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/13/14(Sun)21:42 UTC-4 No.17257149
>>17257135
 
>she opens it up
>you hear her drop the spit
>you lean over and catch it before it hits your laptop
>she leaps over you and grabs your controller
"Really?"
>she sticks her tongue out at you
"Whatever, I can catch up."
>"Good luck. I got myself surrounded."
>your character is surrounded by zombies
>too many to fend off
>you end up dying
>"Say, Anon. This is a really nice gun you picked up."
"That's not fair!"
>"All's fair in love and war."
"Is that so?"
>you give her a devilish grin
>"What are you doing?"
>you stand up and lift up your hands
>she glances over at you
>"Anon, no. Please, not that."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
>"No. Anything, but that."
>she starts squirming away from you
>you go in for the kill
>you grab her and lift her up
>"Aanoooooooooooon!"
>you start shaking her
>"Staaaahhhaaaaahhhhhaaahhhhhaaaaaahhhhp!"
>you can see her starting to fizz up
>you set her down
>she lets out a huge burp
>and another
>and another
>and another
>she drops the controller
>she staggers around the room
>"Oh, boy. I don't feel so good."
>she falls onto the couch
>she speaks in a soft voice
>"Anon. You jerk."
"Oh, I'm sorry."
>you let out a few laughs
>"Anon, I think you hurt me."
>she rolls over, and clenches her stomach
Well shit
>you walk over to her
"Okay, look. I'm actually sorry about that."
>"Come here."
>you lean over
>her voice gets softer
>"I just want you to know..."
>her voice trails off
>you lean in
"Know what?"
>she looks you in the eyes
>her eyes get a little wide
>BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPP
>your ears are ringing from the volume
>as she finishes, she starts to giggle
>her voice comes back to its normal playful tone
>"I just want you to know that you totally deserved that, and should have seen that coming"
"Yeah. Probably."
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)22:06 UTC-4 No.17257513
>Day Lonlier than usual
>Be Anon
>In the Fortress of Anonymity
>tfw no one to cuddle with
>These ponies will never fully accept you
>Go into your fridge and grab a 2 liter of coke
>Luckily that portal sucked a bunch of them to Equestria with you.
>You remember that stupid phrase "Body like a bottle of coke."
>The coke bottle does fit awfully nice into your arms.
>You decide to cuddle with it.
>Fall asleep
>Hours later, wake up
>The coke bottle is now pone
"Dis nuts"
>She stretches out on your chest and yawns
>Big coke flavored kissu
>Hug pony tighter
Bad End
Hows that origin story yo? Would do better job but meh
 
 
Anonymous 04/13/14(Sun)23:41 UTC-4 No.17259021
>Be Anon
>Walk into your kitchen
>Open fridge and grab coke pony
>"Hi Anon! What are we doing today?"
>Deep tongue kiss her.
>Drink that delicious honey.
>"Oh Anon~"
>Spend the rest of the day "drinking her."
>She drinks you too
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)09:36 UTC-4 No.17264882
>Be Anon
>Lazy day with coke pone
>She's sitting on your lap as you two watch tv
>Nice butt/10
>Knock on the door
"Come in!"
>Poiple Smaht walks in with her eyes closed
>That bullshit in movies that's used so the character can speak before being surprised
>"Anon, where have you been? Nopony's seen you in a week."
>She opens her eyes and sees Coke pone enthusiastically waving at her.
>"Who, or what, is that?"
>Coke pone frowns a little
"This is Coca Cola, Coke this is Twilight Spahkle."
>"Hi Twilight!"
>"Anon, put that thing away and come with me."
>You hug Coke pone defensively.
"No."
>"Why not? You always talk about finding a special somepony, how will you do that cooped up in here?"
"I've found a special somepony, her name is Coca Cola."
>Coke pone turns in your arms and gives you a look of absolute happiness.
>Then she starts laying down the smooches.
>"Well, I'll just show myself out then."
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)11:43 UTC-4 No.17265692
>Be Anon
>Coke pone wanted to go to the beach
>You decided why not?
>Now you see why not
>All of these stallions, staring at her
>Thirsty. Wanting to taste your coke pone
>Keep some knuckle dusters in your trunks next time.
>You two are relaxing on the beach and a stallion walks over
>"Hey little filly, how 'bout you give me a taste?"
>She giggles
>"Sorry sir, but only Anon gets to drink me."
>He turns to you
>"That guy?! You're wasting your time baby. Come with me."
>Stand up and let the pony see your full height
"Quit messing with my girl."
>"What're you gonna do if I don't?"
>Kick him right in his horse mouth.
>He scuddles away, ashamed
>"Aww, my big, tough boyfriend."
>2alpharitenow.webbum
>Pick up coke pony and take her into the bathroom
>69ing in a beach bathroom, tasting each others' sweet nectar.
>Cum simultaneously
>Good Day
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)19:05 UTC-4 No.17270499
>Day Psychiatric Ward for Ponomolies in Equestria
>Be hired as assistant in the Soda Ward.
>Department ran by the shrink...
>Dr. Pepper
>"How's it shaking, Dr. ?".
Ah, Anon, good to see you... and /very funny/... So, Sprite-Remix had another accident in the hall today...
>Goddamnit
Cream Soda's diabetes was acting up, so she needs a refill...
>Jesus christ
And that Lemon Shandy found her way into the liquor cabinet again.
>Why do you even have that fucking thing, Doc?
>"Yes sir, I'll get on all that."
>Fucking jobs.
>Fucking economy.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)19:11 UTC-4 No.17270581
>>17270499
>Make your way to the hall where you know Sprite-Remix lives.
>Such a fruity little sodapone. His personality's a mix of flamboyance, rap music, and bluntness... He's got no minutae... no color, if you will.
> See the big spill of soda.
>Good I brought the mop.
>Just as you start cleaning up, hear the beat start from his room.
>"Remix... What's up? And what happened this time?"
>The little faggot moonwalks out of his room, and does a little spinnytwirl thing.
Oh hayy there Anon...
>He actually fucking giggles.
Not much going on, just practicing my moves... which, hehe, was also what I was doing this morning when...
>"Ahhh, I get it."
>little prick.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)19:20 UTC-4 No.17270686
>>17270581
>You finish cleaning it up while he does his thang in the hall.
>"You know 'mix, it wouldn't happen so often if you'd actually learn how to dance.." You chuckle.
>He stops, turns to you, and does a wrist flick.
>How is that even anatomically possible, there's no joint there?
Puhh-lease 'Nonny, I'm going on the real rap scene one day, and I've gotta know my moves~
>Contemplate telling him what earth rappers would think of him.
>Decide not to hurt the little pansy's feelings.
>"Anyway, At least be more careful next time, yo, it makes it easer to keep the place up."
>He giggles again,
Sure thing Anon, sorry.
>He then trots up and actually hugs your leg.
>Fuck.
>Fuck.
>How is he adorable?
>You smile, pet his head, and throw the mop in the bin before heading off to Cream's.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)19:34 UTC-4 No.17270900
>>17270686
>Round the bend, through the lobby.
>Heh, with the lobby where it is in the building, traffic going in or out, if it was busy, would be...
bottlenecked
>Go to the room of Cream Soda.
>Poor thing may be here, but she's got tasste.
>Room painted a soft orange, little drawings on the walls, flowers in the window.
>Very Home Decor meets Zen.
> She's laying on her bed, turned toward you, on top of her covers.
>She's empty, but fortunately sodaponies don't get injured when they're empty, they just feel really sick.
Oh... H-hey Anon... How're you?
>More worried about me, precious little thing.
>would cuddle the shit out of her little glassy body.
>for now though, get the soda=pump.
>"I'm good, Cream... I guess I don't need to ask how you are?"
>She smiles weakly.
N-no, but I'll be better in a bit I expect...
>you sigh. "Alright, girl, this part ain't glamorous, but you know what to do..."
>She sighs, and lays head facing you on her tummy.
>you reach onto the top of her head and unscrew the cap, setting it aside.
>"At least you don't act like remix and go dancing around with both caps off and your mouth open."
>She giggles
Oh is that what happened?
>"I think... couldn't even bother to put his rear one in." You whisper to her secretively.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)19:52 UTC-4 No.17271167
>>17270900
>She has a hearty chuckle, as you slip the nozzle a little into the top of her head.
>You turn on the machine, and it starts to fill her with soda.
>She gives a long sigh of relief as the stuff swirls around inside her legs, steadily filling her
Mmmm, thanks Anon.
>"Of course, it's what I'm here for."
>She nuzzles your hand a little as the device finishes up.
>Take it out, put it up, twist the cap back on the bottle for alter...
>Start to head out the door.
Heh, you know you could always use the other nozzle?
>What?
>Turn around just as she shuts the door in your face, a wide grin and a wink the last thing you see.
>Stupid sexy soda.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)20:35 UTC-4 No.17271850
>You sit at the dining room table with your newspaper in your hands and a cup of coffee on the table.
>From the corner of your eye, you catch a flash of neon green outside the window.
>A thought passes through your mind that you quickly shrug off.
"Nah. There's no way it was him."
>You can hear the quiet tone of the doorbell from the living room and a few garbled words when Coke answers it.
>Wonder what's going --
>"Hey, Anon! Come quick! You've gotta meet my cousin Vault!"
>Vault?
>"C'mon, Anon, man! Don't leave me hangin'!"
>That voice!
>It's him!
"... Surge!"
>He's finally returned!
>You toss the paper against the wall and scramble out of your seat.
>The coffee flies from the table and shatters on the ground.
>You slip.
"Dammit!"
>You struggle to get to your feet as you claw across the floor.
>Every moment seems like an eternity, but you finally leap through the doorway into the other room.
"Where? Where is he?"
>Coke gives you a disappointed look.
>"Well shoot, Anon, you just missed him. He said he was in a hurry and couldn't stick around too long."
>You stare out the open door.
>You fall to your knees. Tears are already fogging your eyes.
>After waiting all those years.
"I never got to tell him how I feel. I never even had a chance to say goodbye..."
>Coke pone gives you a pat on the shoulder.
>"Don't worry. I'm sure he'll be back someday."
>You wipe your eyes and breathe deeply.
>A determined look comes to your face as you rise to your feet.
"You're right. He will be back."
>And you don't care if it takes another fifteen years.
>You'll wait for him.
 
>The End
>Based on a true story
 
Coke CYOA CocaineCola !!11rsOjJu35S 04/14/14(Mon)22:06 UTC-4 No.17273274
File: 1397527604797.jpg-(80 KB, 708x768, ba0f56c0-657d-42a6-a5f3-a(...).jpg)
Okay, a CYOA because why not.
>Be Anon
>Come home after a hard day's work
>Open your fridge and grab a Coca Cola
>"Eek!"
>...It's alive.
>What do? Dubs, 9, and 0 decide.
 
Anonymous 04/14/14(Mon)22:54 UTC-4 No.17273958
>>17271167
>You head off to the room nearest to the kitchen, to deal with the alcopony.
>Why'd they have to make it so easy for her.
>You creak open the door, and find the thing running in a circle.
>She looks at you and hiccups.
Oh.. h-hey, Annie... Wha-what are you doing?
> you sigh
>"Shandy, you've really gotta stop getting drunk, or at least so drunk, every single night."
>She blows a raspberry
Oh hush Anon I'm not an alc... alcoholic, I'm not even dat trunk right now..."
>You walk over to the bedside and pick up the empty handle.
>"You drank all of this didn't you, just today?"
>She hic's again.
N... Nahhh, I wouuldn' do thhhhhat."
 
Trips or best choice with a reason why 04/15/14(Tue)00:54 UTC-4 No.17275756
>>17273958
>You just sigh,
>Walk over to the table, pick up the bottle, throw it out.
>That one's gonna have to just learn the hard way what she's doing to herself.
>Or it might be that she only feels natural full of alcohol.
>She i Lemon Shandy.
 
>You sigh, and having already done three fun little tasks for the morning, head to the breakroom.
>You sit, grab a coffee, think a little on what you'll do after work, when...
Hey, Anon!
>It's...
 
[which one of the four met just far is it... This /will/ end in sex]
 
Anonymous 04/15/14(Tue)01:10 UTC-4 No.17275977
File: 1397538624945.png-(86 KB, 450x450, 41269__safe_oc_food+pony_(...).png)
>>17275510
 
>at the movies with Coke pony
>she's sitting in your lap so you can take occasional sips of her coke-y goodness in the form of sweet, bubbly kisses
 
>she reaches for some of the movie snacks you got
>grabs a Mentos, mistaking it for some other candy
>pops one in her mouth
>in an instant, her insides start to foam and churn
>she doesn't want to let you know what she just did, and clamps her hooves to her mouth with a loud clink, trying not to spray foam everywhere
>she manages not to erupt from her mouth, but to her horror she feels her back end start to spurt
>she tries to clench her glass buttcheeks shut, but the pressure overwhelms her
>whimpering in mortification, she suddenly has a messy, fizzy accident right in your lap
>her face when sitting in your lap in a fizzy puddle of her own making
 
Wat do?
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/15/14(Tue)02:10 UTC-4 No.17276615
>>17257149
 
>"Wow. That was good one!"
>you're still leaning over her
"I'd be offended if your breath didn't smell so delicious."
>"Oh, how sweet, Anon! You're such a romantic."
"I know. Compliments, food, letting you beat me in..."
>"Hey, I told you: all's fair, and I ended with the high score."
"Only because I earned it."
>"Maybe next time you'll learn not to be such a chump."
"Yeah. Probably."
>she lets out a tiny laugh
>you give her a smile
>she reciprocates with a smile of her own
>you lean in toward her, and close your eyes
>"Anon?"
"Yeah?"
>"What do you think you're doing?"
>you open your eyes
>Coke is looking at you with an eyebrow raised in suspicion
"Well...I thought..."
>"Sorry, but that's not happening. I will say: it was sweet of you to try though."
"Thank you?"
>"No problem. Now get off me. It's getting warm. I need to get some more ice."
>you get up
>she hops up off the couch
"Help yourself. Not really much I can do to stop you."
>she holds up her hoof
>"That's right."
>she trots off into the kitchen
Damn. What's her deal? Ponies are supposed to be horny, and horny all the time. Right?
>you hear her fiddling around in the kitchen
>you hear the sound of her pulling out another ice tray, and pouring ice into the bowl
>"Hey, what's this?"
"What's what?"
>"Men-taws?"
"Mentos?"
>"Yeah."
"I would stay away from those if I were you."
>"Oh, yeah? Why's that?"
"Just trust me. That stuff's bad news. You'll ruin my floors."
>"Why? What will this do? Make me piss uncontrollably?"
"If you're lucky: yes."
>"And if I'm unlucky?"
"You'll explode."
>"You're exaggerating."
"Only slightly."
>"Well, down the hatch!"
"You better not!"
>you get up
>you sprint to the kitchen
>her body starts fizzing up
Oh Christ. This is not going to end well.
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/15/14(Tue)02:47 UTC-4 No.17276998
>>17276615
 
>"Anon, what's going on?"
"I told you not to do it! Why didn't you listen?"
>"I thought you were joking!"
"You do no 'joke' with Coke and fucking Mentos!"
>"Well how was I supposed to know?!"
"By fucking LISTENING to me!"
>in one violent motion, she starts throwing up
>all the color leaves her body
>she's completely clear right now
>she collapses onto the ground
"Goddammit. The hell were you thinking?"
>no response
"Come on. Get up, so you can help me clean this mess."
>her voice comes across faintly
>"Anon..."
"No, I'm not falling for this one. You've ruined made a huge fucking mess."
>"Anon, please."
"No."
>she's just lying there
She's crying wolf
>"Anon..."
She's crying wolf...
>"Fine then."
>she rolls onto her stomach
>she tries lifting herself, but collapes
She's just crying wolf, right?
>you see her panting
Okay, maybe she's not
>you run over to her
"I swear God, if you burp in my face again."
>she lets out a strained chuckle
>"Very funny."
"Okay, what's wrong?"
>"You tell me. You did this."
"You ate the damn thing!"
>"You left it out! Now can you bring me some water?"
"For fuck's sake. You're like a child."
>"You sound like my parents."
"Did they never teach you to never eat mysteri-"
>"Anon?"
"Yeah?"
>"Water?"
"Right."
>you get up
>you grab a glass, fill it, and bring it to her
>"Anon, I'm gonna need a hell of a lot more than that."
"How much?"
>"Buckets worth."
"Jesus. Why don't I just stick you under the faucet?"
>"That...might work."
>you pick her up and lay her on the counter
>you grab the hose from the side of the sink
>you bring it over to her
>you turn on the water
>she starts drinking
>slowly, she starts filling up
>she's still clear
>you look around the kitchen
Shit, man. How the hell did you get yourself into this? Oh yeah, a magical bottle of pop in the shape of a horse ate a Mentos after rejecting your advances to have sex with it
>you start laughing
>only a little at first
>your laughter grows
>soon, it's almost maniacal
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/15/14(Tue)03:11 UTC-4 No.17277193
>>17276998
 
>"What the hell is your deal?"
"This. Just this whole thing."
>"I could have died!"
"Yeah, but you didn't."
>she gives you a dirty look, then turns the hose on you and squeezes the trigger before going back to downing more water
"Come on. This is funny."
>Coke looks around at the mess she caused
>"Yeah, I guess."
>she gives you another squirt
"Hey!"
>"What? It's funny."
>you shake your head
"Yeah, I guess."
>she finishes up drinking
>she's still clear, but at least not empty anymore
>"Alright, I'm going to lie down."
>she walks tiredly back into the living room
>you look around one more time
Yeah. This mess can wait
>you follow her
>she's on the couch
>you sit beside her
>she looks over at you
>she crawls over and lays partly in your lap
>she gives you a kiss on the cheek
>her lips are cold
"So you can kiss me, but it's wrong if I try something?"
>"I decide who does and doesn't get a kiss, and when."
>she lays her head down and closes her eyes
>"Thanks for not letting me die. It was really sweet of you."
"Yeah. No problem."
>you rest your hand on her neck and give her a few pets
>"Anon?"
"Yeah?"
>"I never did get my ice."
"And?"
>"Could you get it for me?"
>she looks up
>"Please?"
>she gives you her best puppy dog face
>you let out a sigh
>you get up from your spot and head to the kitchen
>you spot the bowl of ice she poured, and start walking over
>your feel the stickiness of the Mentos induced disaster against your feet
You know you're essentially walking in pony puke, right? Well, whatever.
>you grab the bowl, and walk back into the living room
>you notice some of her color has come back, but only barely
 
!!aZ081ZlxxYk 04/15/14(Tue)03:40 UTC-4 No.17277444
>>17277193
 
"Come on. Scooch your booch."
>she sets up
>you sit down, and Coke goes back to laying in your lap
>you place the bowl next to her, and she lays her face into it, spilling some of the ice
>lethargically, she eats
>you go back to petting her
>you sit there until she finishes it
>the bowl just falls from her face onto the ground
"You gonna pick that up?"
>"No."
"Fine then."
>you grab the bowl and set it on the table
>she closes her eyes, and you do the same
>you feel her head gently rub your leg in affection
>"Hey, Anon. Before I forget, I just want to say: sorry for all the trouble I caused. I know I wasn't the best house-guest. Thanks for being patient with me."
"Eh, it's not that big of a deal. The kitchen's not THAT big of a mess, and it did make the night interesting for me."
>"I kinda mean before that. I was pretty invasive. Just made myself right at home without even asking."
"I would have said 'yes' anyways."
>"That's sweet."
"Not as sweet as you."
>Coke looks up at you with an expression of disappointment
>she shakes her head, then gets up from the couch
"What?"
>"That was awful. I'm going back to the fridge."
"Give me a break. It's been a long night!"
>"I'll see you in the morning, Anon."
"You know, this IS my house? I could tell you that you can't sleep in the fridge."
>she turns back to you and smiles
>"Yeah, but you probably won't."
>she opens the door, and crawls in, closing the door behind her
She's right, you know?
"Really? You're going to do this over a terrible joke?"
>you hear her muffled voice
>"Yep. Goodnight, Anon."
>you sigh
"Goodnight."
Seriously?
>you look to your hand
Whelp. I guess it's just you and me. Again.
 
THE END
 
>>17277419
Thanks for the suggestion, man