> Trixie: “Now, this was around noon, mind! I was in the middle of my venture through the Everfree forest-“
You went to the Everfree Forest, alone.
> Trixie: “Yes!”
Why?
> She gives a peeved sniff in your direction, as if this was an obviously rhetorical question.
> Trixie: “Perhaps if you stop interrupting me, you’ll know?”
> Hands in the air like you just don’t care; you give up trying to make any sense from the very beginning and let her go wild.
> Twilight decides at this point that salad and popcorn goes good together, and so brings a gracious bowl of each; ignoring the salad bowl of course (this earns you angry points with Twilight) you indulge on both snack and tale alike.
> Trixie: “So, Everfree Forest. I decided that I was going to defeat an Ursa Minor.”
> Twi: “Y-you… YOU WHAT?!”
> Trixie gives some sort of smug huff once more, as if glorifying herself in the amazed and incredulous look on Twilight’s.
> Trixie: “Ever since your and I’s last encounter, I’ve been working diligently to finally reach my goal, and so today I felt that the time is at hand for me to fulfill my destiny!”
Your tribute to life was to… kill a baby mythical creature.
> Trixie: “Yes.”
Go on.
> Trixie: “Hmph. So I spent about an hour going through the woods, and I landed myself amongst a foul pack of timberwolves, ready to tear me to shreds!”
> Twilight gasps in a fit of fright; you’re not buying the story, but you might as well have a hoot or two listening;
> Who knows, you might write a story or something, one day.
-----
[This perspective is done by Trixie, stated here to avoid confusion.]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L3XT6k7k0pI
[You’ll want to click on that, trust me.]
> I was in the middle of an incredible ambush; there ten, no, TWENTY of them!
> But alas, not even a hundred could handle the awesome power of the GREAT and POWERFUL Trixie! Not a chance!
> Before they could move an inch, I summoned the inferno of Tartarus itself and unleashed my greatest work yet- and since they’re made out of wood, they fled like terrified puppies!
> I permitted myself a laugh no less than ten seconds of hearty merit before I ventured in search of my prey.
> Anon: “And they just ran away?”
> Ha! The sight of fire everywhere shook them to their very twigs and I yelled in a mighty fury!
> Twi: “Oh, wow. (Hey Anon, are you going to sleep with me tonight?)”
> Anon: “(Yeah, that’s the plan.)”
> And so I continued down the path, and behold! A ravenous and most evil manticore stopped on my trail! It demanded my life in exchange for passage; of course, I blatantly refused, haha!
> Anon: “Err…”
> … I never said manticores were bright, you should know this!
> Anon: “Right. (Did you want to try it pony form or human?)”
> And so the brutal monster charged at me with frivolous ardor, but he was nothing to Trixie- I mean, me! I FLEW over his head and showed him a most dangerous earth sealing spell!
> Twi: “(Uhmm… can we both be ponies tonight? :3)
> The beast was strong, but the ground was stronger as it devoured him, leaving him to sit there in a dirt prison that was not going to let him go anytime soon, courtesy of Trixie!
> Unmiffed a single bit, I continued on my vengeful warpath of prominence!
> Anon: “(Ughh, are you going to try to fuck me in my sleep?)”
> By then it was midafternoon, and soon I found myself at a monstrous lake-
> Twi: “Why would I do that, you idiot! I wouldn’t try to… do that…”
> Anon: “Sweetheart, you’re not the most convincing.”
> SILENCE! I DEMAND YOU!
> Twi: “ … Sorry.”
> Anon: “My bad. So, giant lake?”
> MONSTROUS lake! It was there that I saw the tracks of the great foe to-be, imprinted on the smooth gravel and sand; I knew from that moment that my adventure was coming to a rough climax!
> Following the path, I trailed around this lake for MILES, and I mean miles!
> Anon: “(Why do you want me in bed as a stallion?)”
> Twi: “(Same reason you like to sleep with a human… I’ve never done it before either.)”
> Soon there was a voracious thrashing from the water, and I came across a mighty water dragon, ready to tear me to shreds! Equipped with three lines of fangs and an ever more impressive mustache, he lunged from the lake at me for an easy meal!
> Of course, I may have been a bit scared and had to retreat for a few yards in an effort to dodge the chilling attack, only for me to counter with the most powerful Wind Elemental spells Equestria has to offer!
> Anon: “Oh? And what spell would that be?”
> I freeze, unsure as to how to respond to this. Anxiety at my fabrications being caught on as elaborate as my spellcasting…
> Twi: “Are you narrating your own thoughts now, Trixie?”
> Ack! Anyways, the titanic terror of law defying proportions was in a befitted rage after suffering such a grievous loss, and surrenders to the battle at hand!
> Returning back into the lake with an arrogant roar of disapproval, I give a cheer of triumph before catching back to the trail.
-----
> [Perspective returns to you as Trixie continues to explain a sophisticated tale about how much of an expert she in in recognizing animal tracks.]
> This, of course, is entirely misconstrued as nothing short of pure bullshit, as the tracks are so ridiculously huge that it would be nearly impossible to lose sight of them.
> Glancing over at Twilight, you notice that she’s diverted her attention from the misguided tale over to you; you wouldn’t go so far to say that she’s staring at you (granted it doesn’t make you the least bit of uncomfortable despite the fact she’s right next to you), but the look she gives is, perse… romantic, perhaps?
> Yes! Upon using the word, romantic fits her gaze almost flawlessly; her light pressure against your side, her hoof around your arm, and with eyes that could charm the darkest demon this world has to offer, you suddenly realize that she’s trying a spell.
> Technically, anyways; she’s using the magic of seduction.
> Mind you, that there are several spells that can influence the desire of another; be it an object or another person (or rather, pony), Twilight, yourself, and any other capable unicorn could easily misdirect another’s feelings.
> Of course, the moment you realize that you’re suddenly horny for Twilight Sparkle out of the blue, you’ll make sure to pass a negation spell- not to mention a self-served eviction notice.
> Mimicking her guise of passion nonetheless, you peer down with a bemused smirk, as if daring her to try something with the presence of a self-proclaimed mastermind storyteller in store.
> With a silence notion, you nudge your hand through her mane of fine silken hair, and rest a single finger on her horn.
> With that, you begin the spell assistance incantation, being able to speak with Twilight telepathically and scaring the shit out of her.
> Twi: “Ah! Umph.”
> Trixie: “Beg your pardon? That’s hardly a question in regards to how I managed to learn about this.”
Where did you acquire such magnificent skills, Trixie?
> Letting her toot her non-existent horn, your eyes glaze over along with Twilight’s, and begin to chit-chat in a more discreet form than hidden whispering.
(So, where’s Spike? It’s awfully late for him to be out like this, assuming he’s younger than us.)
> Twi: (Hehe, he told me that he was going to stay the night at Rarity’s. They have a thing for each other, if you haven’t noticed.)
(I’ve noticed that she’s a conceited asshole that seems to be leeching the love out of him. I wouldn’t doubt if she was actually an arrogant changeling.)
> Twi: “(Hehehehe, hey! That’s not nice to say things like that, especially to my friends. They’ve helped me out a lot in the past, you know.)”
(She’s a great friend to you, and that’s wonderful. However, she was wrongly indignant to me, ergo I find her a tad less deserving of whatever respect and attention she craves.)
> Twi: “(Fine, fine, if you insist. I love it when you use words like that.)”
(Like what? It’s just vocabulary, anything with a brain can be pompous, just like anybody can be vulgar.)
> Twi: “(It still bugs me when you say this “anybody” word instead of “anyp0ny”. Do they not teach you properly for grammar where you come from?)”
(Sweetheart, you say anyp0ny back in my world, and you’d be laughed at; not before being detained for scientific study for being a talking pony, though.)
> Twi: “(For science!)”
> Your mental self gives a healthy laugh at this, her blissful ignorance of being dissected and whatnot portraying her naïve cuteness all the same.
> Twi: “(Hey, Anon~…)”
(What’s up?)
> Twi: “(… What can we do in here?)”
> Now THAT’s the question of the hour, and the answer is somewhat limitless; being in the realm of conscious stability, this place is more or less a room of empty darkness that you have been pulled into the back of each of your minds.
> Still able to hear Trixie drone on in the background, you sit down and give a halfhearted shrug.
(Beats me. What’s on your mind?)
> Bumdumptsh.png
> Twi: “(Wellllll… I was wondering, since we’re dating, what could we possibly do here? Since it’s entirely our minds doing the work versus our bodies, we could do… anything.)”
> She puts quite the emphasis on that last word, and the cogs in your head begin to work; you’re almost adamantly sure that she wants to pull some crazy stuff here, and you’re unsure as to what you want.
> Sure, in these circumstances you could argue that while nothing actually happens physically, it’s the mental step into the relationship that urks you; perhaps you’re taking things too fast?
> Perhaps she just needs a good rutting for the sake of satisfaction, and you can proceed this sudden relationship at a more steady pace?
> The call of judgment is there to decide the fate of you two almost instantaneously; refusing will lower her esteem and strain your relations as a teacher, and accepting will both (hopefully) be satisfying and productive in both her motivation to learn and for your progression in succeeding your goal in having a star pupil rise in glory.
> A bit theatrical, perhaps, but meh! Details, who needs em?
> Twi: “(… Anon? I’m sorry, that was a bit bold, and uncalled for. Sorry for suggesting such-)”
(Let’s have some fun, shall we?)
-----
> No, you don’t want to go into detail, but for the sake of clarity, you’ll take the humble blow and explain what happens next.
> Twi: “(Wait, what? I mean, you understand what I’m trying to say, right?)”
(You want to fuck, or at least get some sort of foreplay in, I assume.)
> Twi: “(What? No! I mean, idiot! I was suggesting like, truth or dare, 21 questions! Blah!)”
(I apologize then, it’s just such games can easily be done without such a spell; I figure you wanted to do something that would be beneficial through discretion.)
> Twi: “(Well, uhm… ugh. You’re right, but… I just realized how nervous I am right now, I’m probably shaking in real life.)”
(Hey, relax. It was a suggestion, and you know the offer is there. Truth or dare, eh?)
-----
> [At this point Trixie is going full blown theater shows, ignoring the two of you as the audience while she hops about with enthusiasm.]
> I finally found myself in the mouth of the evil beast’s lair, having spent the better half of an hour hunting it down!
> Now, I won’t hide that I was a bit nervous; who wouldn’t be in trying to take down a mythical creature, right? But I digress, and courageously enter the cavern that reeked of foul stenches.
> With every step I grew more paranoid, wary even; and it was evident that my cautious mindset paid off well when the Ursa Minor charged right out!
> Now, being so confined in a straightforward environment, I knew I simply had to lure it outside to be at the advantage here! I may be brave and powerful, but I was no fool to forgo such a wondrous chance to come out on top so the world may see!
> With an extravagant array of minor spells and insults to infuriate the blasphemous being, I managed to pull it out into the open! The sunny skies unforgiving to the bear’s luscious fur, it was an easy target to fight in a majestic pose of magical strength and wit!
> Now, this was either the most arrogant foul entity I’ve met, or the bravest; having landed blows that could take out several ponies in an instant, it continued to rampage through the forest as I made daring charges and calculated retreats!
> I’ll ignore your mindless indulgence for now, Anon and Twilight Sparkle; I cannot blame you, for being so dazzled by such an illustrated story!
-----
> Twi: “(Truth or dare?)”
(Truth.)
> Twi: “(Do you find any of my friends attractive?)”
(That’s a loaded question, but I’ll be honest; no, I don’t. Applejack’s accent is a blessing from Nayru herself, but otherwise you have secured the position for being the most attractive and interesting pony around.)
> This seems to give her some sort of giggling fit, as if needing to hear such an obvious statement is enough to quell her personal stash of buried fear.
> With Twiight now sitting in your lap, you’ve materialized her old rickety couch (bless its soul and whatever happened to it); chilling within the infinite boundaries of each other’s minds, you prepare another question to pass the time of pretending to hear the droning of Trixie’s bolstering.
(Truth or dare?)
> Looking at you deviously, you could only wonder what things she wants you to challenge her with.
> The most enigmatic and confusing pervert you’ve met so far.
> Twi: “(Truth. I’m afraid you’ll try to force me to commit sexual acts if I go anywhere near dare.)”
(That’s nothing but codswallop. I know with almost absolute certainty that you have the dirtier mind of the two.)
> Twi: “(No way, idiot! And besides, just because I occasionally act… frisky, perse, it just shows that I am a perfectly healthy mare.)”
(Yeah, ok. Your question is: are you wanting to commit sexual acts with me?)
> With a precise shot at the heart, you nailed down her sudden lack of intuition in avoiding questions with a smug look.
> Twi: “(That’s… that’s cheating! You can’t ask that!)”
(Can’t I?)
> She shifts nervously in her spot, rubbing her flank ever so dangerously next to Excalibur; thankfully physical contact here is nothing, and that you only have to worry about the intellectual aspect.
> Your jimmies are golden dipped and solidified; they cannot be stirred without the use of intense heat.
> Twi: “(And what if I did? I know I just met you in all mechanics, but I feel at ease with you, I surely like you, and, well… I’ve never done anything like that before.)”
(Alright. I suppose you’re gonna tell me that it’s simply ‘for research’, and you’re going to send the results to the Princess?)
> Twi: “(Ya caught me, guard, arrest me now~!)”
> You both share a laugh, the joke leaving you to figure out whether your question has been truly answered.
> Twi: “(Alright, anyways. Truth, or dare?)”
(I’m not a scaredy cat like yourself- dare.)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NisCkxU544c
> Twi: “(Oho, brave one, aren’t we? Alright, how about…)”
> She enters some sort of pensive meditation for a couple moments before coming up with a result.
> Twi: “(I dare you to… kiss me!)”
> This triggers a snorting sound of disbelief from you, having prepared for far worse endeavors.
(Well, that’s not so bad.)
> Twi: “(Is kissing me a bad thing?)”
> She’s loading the questions in her twelve gauge with each chance she gets, geez.
(Ohhh yeah, it’s said that each time a human kisses, there’s a 2% chance that the exchange of saliva can contract a disease and die.)
> Mononucleosis is a terrible thing!
> Twi: “(I can’t tell if you’re being serious or not.)”
> Picking her up and turning her around, you go face to face with her; without a moment of hesitation, you embrace her dearly and kiss her the most passionate way you can in the barrier of your minds.
> Having never kissed an actual pony (bear in mind that the first time Twilight was human) since your coming here, you’ll duly note that it is entirely awkward in terms of facial structure to that of a human; putting this aside, you let her “dare” take full fruition until the need for oxygen drives the two of you apart.
> The two of you in reality held your breaths during this spectacular moment, having no need to in the beauty of the connection of the spell; appallingly so, your instinct demanding you don’t breathe whilst amidst of such physical contact.
> Twi: “(Wow… that… was even better than before.)”
(Don’t enjoy too much at once dear; you could become addicted.)
> Still mere inches from each other in both mind and body, it’s as if you’re abounding a thousand mysteries you’ve yet to conquer and understand;
> As a genius and seemingly prodigal wizard many sciences and mathematics, augmented by the beauty that is magic, have been but a small delay in your thirst for knowledge.
> Yet there is one discipline that remains untold genuinely, the sole subject of knowledge that you likely will be frustrated in trying to master and understand, one that is simply beyond the measurement of pheromones, chemical processes, even psychological study-
> And it’s staring you dead in the eyes.
(Your next assignment will be to write the largest possible essay on what is love.)
> Twi: “(Eh?! What am I supposed to title the thesis, ‘What is Love’?)”
(I will provide you with all the necessary subjects and detailed experiences necessary, and I will make sure you will not be in any short supply of figuring and constructing a well put composition of it.)
> Twi: “(Bwuh, erm. Everything?)”
(Everything. That is my dare to you.)
> And that’s how it began, your true relationship with Twilight.
> The wonders of science and magic, challenged by the curious and brilliant; through any means you will make this your true goal above all else.
> Having been so inexperienced in the art and study, you’ll be doing your damn best to comprehend; with Twilight by your side as your test subject and romantic interest, you will conquer yet another subject in any way possible.
> Love? Meet science and magic, motherfucker.
> Your days of being mystical are numbered.
-----
> [Trixie’s Perspective]
> The final struggle of epic proportions escalated into a full out war of this pathetic excuse of a bear and yours truly, and soon it became a pure match of brute strength and mystical valor!
> Through the sandy beaches of the lake before, we dueled into what turned into a massive brawl; no longer anything but equal forces, it was no mistake as to why I lost to this monster before!
> It took nearly an hour to fend each other off, taking and giving blows as each of us grew steadily exhausted; while I *of course* was more than capable, the Ursa Minor soon realized that it was not even close to a match!
> It was when it turned in a moment of hesitation that its fate was sealed; before I realized what had happen, the dragon from before lurched out of the rifting water, grappling the poor bear by behind!
> With no means of escape and a guttural roar of plea, it was dragged under the surface of water where it suffered a terrible destiny, that cowardly dragon!
> It must have watched eagerly for such a chance, having been plotting for easy prey ever since it’s last failure being the great me!
> Having gained satisfaction despite the hollow victory, I came back to Ponyville, took a nap somewhere, and came back here.
> BEHOLD MY GLORY!
-----
> Having just left the Incantation Assistance spell in time, both you and a befuddled Twilight sit there in a daze to find Trixie standing on her hind legs on the coffee table.
> In some desperate attempt to remain smooth in accepting that Trixie is in this ridiculous position, you give the best damn golf clap you could muster yourself into doing, added to her exaggerated effect of being awe-inspiring.
> Trixie: “Thank you! Now you under normal circumstances, I’d charge for such a wonderful display of my endless supply of brave stories; however, just for you two, I will let it slide and mark it all off as a service in payment for your teachings.”
> Twi: “That was, uhm, a very interesting tale! I hope to hear m-“
Oh hey, look at the time!
> Twilight, never, and you mean NEVER, request that again. While this may be in thought only, you think the point comes across somewhat clearly.
> With that moment of your life regarding Trixie’s tale now stored away in a spot in your mind where you hope to forget such a ridiculous mass of lies, you realize that your next lesson will be a fun one;
> Putting the elemental spells aside, there is a sub-lesson that will be crucial for any magic wielding student who wishes to enhance the exciting study of magic-
> Potion-making. An unicorn (or in your case, a wizard) can be the greatest magical entity in this universe and the next; mixtures that boosts your magical fortitude will be strictly beneficial for one who needs to learn to use magic that requires substantial amounts of magic energy.
> Avoided by many for fear of potion related addiction, it was crucial to your swift success, unknown by many.
> You will use it to ensure Twilight’s success, beginning tomorrow.
> The End.