>Obviously they didn't understand. You said it mostly to humor yourself.
>Neither Malus or Rosa really seemed to mind your nakedness as they led you into the heart of their little town, though you certainly got some weird looks. You suspect it's more because of what you are rather than what your not wearing.
>You wouldn't really mind being naked if it wasn't for the sun cooking your skin off your bones.
>Some shoes would be really nice too.
>You notice a few of the ponies are following you now. A couple of them have horns.
>There are fucking unicorns here.
>You sure as hell ain't in Kansas anymore.
>A shadow passes overhead, causing you to look up.
>A pony with wings is hovering there staring at you.
>Fucking hovering.
>How the fuck is that even possible?
>You shake such thoughts from your head.
>You went to sleep one night, and woke up in the land of magical talking ponies. Nothing is out of the realm of possibility now.
>Your escorts stopped in front of one of the larger buildings, and Malus gestured that you should stay here.
>Grossly outnumbered now, you feel its probably best to obey.
>Rosa stays and stares intently at you while Malus walks up to the building and raps on the door with his hoof.
>Someone opens the door, and he steps inside.
>Rosa continues watching you.
>It is becoming irritating.
>You meet her gaze, and she yours.
>Challenge accepted.
>When Malus leaves the house again, he finds you on your knees, inches from Rosa's face as you glare furiously at each other.
>Malus clears his throat.
>You look up just as a second pony comes into view. This one is black, and he's wearing an almost comical looking black hat.
>You barely stifle a laugh.
>The black one walks right up to you and looks you straight in the face, wearing a serious expression.
>What the fuck is this thing doing? Its examining you like some kind of livestock.
>He says something right to your face that you don't understand, but it didn't sounds very nice.
>You decide you don't like his face.
>With a quick motion, you smack the hat off his head, nimbly catch it in the air, and put it on.
>It actually fits pretty well.
>You fold your arms and resume staring him in the face. Being on your knees is becoming uncomfortable.
>He looks at you in stunned silence for second, then smirks. He says something and gestures to the hat, then turns and shouts at the crowd of ponies that had gathered around you.
>A white unicorn steps forward, she appears to be wearing glasses, and a worried expression.
>The black pony who you assume is in charge begins spouting more gibberish at her.
>You turn your head to look at her, she averts her gaze from you.
>You get the feeling something important just happened.
>You feel a nudge on your should and turn to see the Black pony pointing at you.
>He says something else, and points towards the white unicorn. When you don't immediately react he swings his head towards her and points more vigorously.
>Message received. You stand up and shuffle over to the little pale pony. She nearly cowers before you, but manages to keep her composure.
>You think she might be the one you chased into the woods last night, but you cant be sure. You don't remember seeing a horn. You hope it wasn't her, that would be awkward.
>She looks up at you for a moment, then turns away, heading off into town.
>You adjust your new hat and follow, enjoying the feeling of the sun not searing the back of your neck anymore.
>The unicorn leads you to a small cabin on the edge of the woods.
>Emphasis on small, you nearly had to crawl to get through the door.
>Inside you see what looks like a pretty average home, a desk, a bed, a bookshelf, a desk, and a larger table. Not much of a kitchen though. It feels pretty cramped with you in there.
>She gestures for you to sit at the table.
>You comply, moving aside one of the toddler sized chairs and make yourself comfortable on the floor.
>She begins speaking to you absently as she takes a couple books and a large scroll from her shelf.
>She walks over to the table and points to herself, saying something.
>You are too busy staring at the floating books to really pay attention.
>Why are you even surprised anymore?
>She says the same thing, louder this time. You finally pay attention.
What?
>"Tala" She says, thumping her hoof against her chest.
Tala.
>You repeat her name, then point to yourself.
Anon.
>You're getting used to this routine already.
>"Anon" She confirms, nodding.
>She begins speaking again, and you catch your name a few times as she unrolls the scroll and spreads it out on the table with her freaky unicorn magic. You notice her horn glowing as she does this, perhaps they use that as some sort of focus?
>It's a map. A very unusual looking map. It looks like no real map you've seen before. None of the continents or shapes are recognizable.
>She asks you something with an inquisitive tone, tilting her head. Probably asking where you are from.
>You shake your head and shrug, gesturing to the whole map. Looks like you're further from home than you thought. You aren't just in the middle of the woods somewhere, you're on a different world entirely.
>You consider that for a moment, rubbing your temples. Doesn't seem all that likely you're ever going to see your family or friends again.
>That fact doesn't seem to upset you as much as you thought it would, though you suspect the magnitude of it it hasn't entirely sunk in yet.
>The unicorn seems aware that you are distressed about something, and watches your face while you think.
>She probably thinks you are lost or something. Which technically is true, but an understatement of massive proportions.
>She reaches over and pats you on the arm her her hoof, which is the only place she can reasonably reach.
>She then begins speaking again and points to a labeled dot on the map next to a river.
>"Derbyshire" She says.
Derbyshire?
>She nods, smiling at you.
>That was a weird name, was that the town you were in? Derbyshire?
>She proceeds to circle a large portion of the map, encompassing Derbyshire as well as many other gibberish dots.
>"Equestria."
>Oh gods no.
>She points at an outlined area very near to Derbyshire, not as large as Equestria, but still pretty big.
>"Germaneigh"
>Oh you gotta be fucking kidding me. They used horse puns in the names of their- Oh for fucks sake.
>You struggle for a moment to not lose your shit.
>You succeed. Barely.
>Tala gives you a weird look as you suppress your irrational rage. She is quiet for a moment before continuing.
>She pushes the map away and pulls one of the books in front of her instead.
>You lean in closer, the book is really quite small from your point of view.
>She opens it to the first page, revealing a very large rune looking thing that you recognize as one of the letters used to label things on the map.
>She points to it, looks you straight in the face, and says "Ah".
>You blink, not understanding.
>She turns the page, revealing two more symbols, each one filling an entire page.
>She points to one, "Rrr." Then the other "Sss."
>You get it now. She's teaching you the alphabet. This was probably a good idea, especially if you were going to be living here for the rest of your life, but it didn't make it any more of a daunting task.
>This was going to be a long day.