>Day I never write anything in equestria
>You are Anon, the crazy homeless human
>you dont believe this, of course
>In your mind, you are a tactical stealth operative, out in the field awaiting an update on your next mission objective
>this isn't likely to happen due to the fact that your radio is made out of a matchbox, several coils of wire, and a potato
>until then, all food and weapons are procure on sight
>with that in mind, you peer out of your boxes carrying handle at the apple stall on the outskirts of the marketplace
>You ready your internally supressed subsonic load single shot pistol
>which is actually a rubber band on a stick
>Making your way towards the stand you note a tree with a large and heavily obscured branch that hangs directly over the stall
>The best plan of action is to ditch the box for now
>When the tan pony running the stall is lookng the other way, you silently lift the box off of you and scramble up into the tree
>when in place you ready your O.P.D. or Object Procurement Device
>which happens to be a barbed knitting needle with a bit of twine tied through a hole in one end
>Readying your equipment, you take aim and loose the rubber band at the apples on the pony's arse
>It hits its mark with an audible smack
>"What in tarnation?"
>she spins to face your box
>"Aww heck, not that critter again!"
>sufficiently distracted, she doesnt see you pierce a particularly large apple with the needle
>quickly and silently it is lifted upwards into the tree
>by now she has found out that you are not in the box, but still sniffs around for your scent
>the sight of it sends you into your own world, just you, and the apple
>you cant resist and wolf down a large portion of the juicy fruit
>in such a trancelike state, you are oblivious to the loud munching sounds you are making
>"Ah' know a munchin' varmint when ah' hear one!"
>you are snapped out of it by the violent shaking of the tree, which sends you flying out and onto your ass on the ground
>in a flash you are hogtied and gagged
>You dont know it, but the tan pony is giving you a rather sultry look
>"You ain't gonna be stealin' much of anythin' when I get done with you"
 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=seE8uxEzLL0