Account of 01-25-14, written on the morning of 01-26-14
 
The world is cruel and I'm there feeling everyone else's pain by proxy.
 
It happened again today, something that last happened back on Earth. I was overwhelmed with the weight of just... everything. This time I had access to alcohol, didn't go so well. Amazingly I can recall many of the things that happen, including my ultimate rage and depression when the alcohol not only didn't work and make things worse, but I had to hear some heartrending news: Gold's wife, Starlight, died in childbirth last night. Their children are fine but... my God.
 
I didn't even know her, so to say I felt the pain others like Mary – Starlight was a friend of hers, she had gone to visit her when it happened – were feeling would be an overstatement, and I can't even begin to understand what Gold is going through.
 
Threw my bottle at the wall as soon as I heard the news. Later, Booze had the fucking gall to tell me never to do it again. Shittiest talk I ever had... said if I did it again he could chop my hoof off. Didn't care at the time... not sure if I do now.
 
I'm up early... it's about 3 in the morning. Had a nightmare. It probably gonna egg on me the rest of the day. Let's just say that, even after watching it unfold, I'm still uncertain if it was me or them.
 
My head is killing me... well, no more alcohol then. Gotta do things the old fashioned way: try to steel myself.
 
On the brighter side, Lemon finally announced that she's pregnant. I'd say I'm truly happy for her but... I'm more afraid for her. Life has a way of throwing shit around when you least expect it.
 
Goodbye, Starlight. I never knew you... but I hope one day we'll chat. You watch over Gold with the black parade, now... he needs the protection.