>you are Anon
>you are in terrible terrible agony
>you're slightly comforted by a pleasant breeze, with the aroma of flowers wafting in on this
>boy, you sure are glad you decided to take the day off
>for some reason your eyes won't open
>well, this is kinda relaxing anyway
>
>
>
>oh yeah
>your NMR exploded
>
>
>"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"
>you attempt to bolt upright, and almost manage to do so, before falling off to the side
>but hey, at least your eyes opened because of the shock
>you see a two purple... legs with hooves?
>and a pair of yellow legs with hooves?
>the purple ones look kinda daintier than the yellow ones
>suddenly you hear a voice above you
"Oh my, I hope he wasn't hurt."
"I think I lowered him rather gently. It's difficult catching a... hmm... honestly, I've never seen a creature like this before. Have you, Twilight?"
>Twilight? Creature? Hurt? What the hell is going on?
>a male voice interjects
>"He kinda looks like a shaved Diamond Dog."
>a purple face with green frills and green eyes and HOLY SHIT RAZOR SHARP TEETH AND A SNAKE TONGUE leans into your field of view
"You're not a Diamond Dog, are you?"
>"Nrrrrrrrrrrgh."
>the face moves away
"No, Spike, Diamond Dog facial structure is much different. This... this is some unknown species."
>"Mrrrrrphhhhn."
>"It doesn't seem to be able to talk."
>the softer voice came from the owner of the yellow hooves
>holy shit
>hooves and voices
 
>you're either knocked out and dreaming or maybe you died and went to hell
>guess you shouldn't have tampered with the code of life, huh?
>god is gonna be pissed
>you figured demonic voices would be more... harsh than these
>these sound downright pleasant
>unless of course you haven't died, and instead are just dreaming
>in which case, you're gonna go see your psychiatrist and have them prescribe some pills to make this go away
>one of the yellow legs shifts, and touches you on the shoulder
"Shhh, it'll be okay. Can you point to where it hurts."
>well, your everything hurts
>except you seem to slur out words
>here goes nothing
>"Errrying."
>the purple legs jump up, and the higher voice sounds excited
"I think it's trying to communicate!"
>you attempt to nod, but your muscles aren't very responsive
>"Yeth."
>"Hey Fluttershy, do you have a waterbowl somewhere nearby? Maybe it just needs a drink?"
>you attempt to nod again, as you hear the person called Fluttershy affirm that she does in fact possess a bowl, and that Twilight (presumably the owner of the higher voice) should go get it
>what kind of a name is Fluttershy anyway?
>you see the purple legs move away from you, and you see it's a... quadruped?!
>okay, you're definitely dreaming
>a dainty-looking thing that looks like a horse... except with a... horn?
>so a unicorn
>is galloping away from your field of view
>wat
>you attempt shift your position
>SOME SUCCESS!
>you roll over on your back
>a... yellow face with huge green eyes and a pink mane are looking at you with an unmistakenly concerned expression
>judging from her coloration, you assume that this creature is probably either a top predator, or ridiculously poisonous, because holy shit, she would stick out like a sore thumb in... any environment
>then again, you're either dreaming or dead, so applying traditional logic to nonstandard events.... is actually a pretty good idea
 
>if you're dreaming that is, because then you can use it to wake up, hopefully
>if you're dead, well
>and through strange aeons, even death may die
>where did that come from
>you blink
>she does too
"Hello, strange creature. My friend Twilight is going to bring you back some water, and you'll feel right as, um... water. Goodness, that was lame wasn't it..."
>you can't help but grin at that
>besides she's kind of adorable, in a hallucinatory sort of way
>"Yeth. Phank oo."
>why the hell are you slurring
>you see a purple and green bipedal lizard thing standing a couple of feet away
"Hi, I'm Spike!"
>you attempt a little wave, but can't do it from your position
>you struggle to get up, but she places a hoof on your chest
>"Oh no you don't, mister. You went through some kind of magical portal, and you fell pretty hard. I'm very sorry about that - I'm not used to carring a pony and a... can you tell me what you are?"
>you lick your lips, and attempt to regain control over your tongue
>suddenly you hear footsteps... er, hoofbeats again
"Hey Fluttershy! I also grabbed your medicine kit just in case."
"Oh, good idea Twilight. Can you-"
>a bowl full of water floats towards your face
>it seems to be surrounded by a shimmering purple field of some kind
>Cherenkov radiation? Unlikely. Some kind of magnetic field, and the bowl... no, it seems to be made out of clay. Magic?
>you take a look around, and see that the unicorn's horn is glowing
>oh, and the yellow one is the pegasus, now that she stepped back
>so you... nah, nevermind
>let's just roll with it
>you crane your neck, and manage to touch the rim of the bowl. it floats closer, and you start guzzling down the water
>oh man, that hit the spot
>you move your arms, and manage to sit up
>holy shit your head is spinning
>"To answer your previous question, I am a human."
>the... unicorn and pegasus look at one another
>they burst out laughing
>gosh they look adorable
>"Why are you laughing?"
 
>the unicorn gives you a wide grin
"Well, humans don't look like you do, for one thing-"
>your eyes drop down. you're still wearing you lab coat, your jeans... nothing too abnormal
"-and they've been extinct over 1000 years or so."
>you look at them with your mouth open
>"EXTINCT?! EXPLAIN!!"
>you tried to shout, but it didn't come out loud enough
>they look at you quizzically
>you pull your legs under you, and fall forwards, standing on all fours. you're about level with them.
>you stand up, at about twice their height
>they look up at you, and Twilight, the purple unicorn, looks at you from another angle
"Hmm, well he is bipedal. He resembles a human superficially. Perhaps he's from some kind of degenerate offshoot?"
>you raise your eyebrow at her, and she mimics the motion
>the dragon sizes you up
"No, he's definitely not a Diamond Dog. Too tall, by far."
>"And you're colorful ponies who are either a figment of my imagination, or my eternal punishment. Degenerate. Pfft."
>the unicorn gives you a look, while the pegasus flies up and looks at you closely
"Eternal punishment? Figment of imagination? You must've took a blow to the head. Would you mind if I examined you?"
>you look at her, and wonder how the hell she's able to fly with those wings
>they aren't big enough or beating quickly enough to support her
>you nod, slowly
"Oh, and I'm gonna to the library, and get any human-related books I can!"
>with that she runs off, her dragon assistant in tow
>pfft, what does she know. she doesn't even have hands to read with
>though she was presmably manipulating that field that you saw her operate the bowl with, so maybe
>the pegasus flies in front of you, and points a hoof in the direction of the most ramshackle, and yet, oddly-cozy looking cottage a couple of meters away
>"You'll have to stoop a bit to get inside, I hope that's okay."
>you give a nod, and almost black out from the dizziness
>you follow her, and as she opens the door, you kneel, and go inside