>What the hell is going on in here?
"What the fuck are you three doing in my house?"
>The CMC look to you.
>Scootaloo starts to run, "Cheese it, it's him!"
>They scatter like cockroaches in the light.
>You see that Sweetie Belle has something in her magical grasp.
>She slides it into her saddlebags before you can read what it is.
"What the hell did you just take!?"
>They are already out the door and close to the forest when you look to them.
>Looking at the pile of magazines they-
>No.
>They fucking didn't.
>They took...
>Your last Playboy magazine.
>Well, the one that wasn't ruined with stains and 'other' fluids.
"Those fuckers."
>Donning your favorite wetsuit and ski mask, you run to intercept the little runts to their tree house.
>With a impossible speed, putting healthy kenyans to shame, you run the mile to the the tree house.
>Three minutes? Nice.
>With the speed, you jump to the top of the tree house and you see the three run out.
>"How did he get here so fast!?"
>"Ahm nawt shure, but we need tah get out while we can!"
>Jumping down, you grab Scootaloo by her back legs.
>Doing your best Batman voice, you shout.
"WHERE IS IT!?"
>You attach a small cable to her legs and hold her over the edge.
>She's scared out of her fucking mind.
>Good.
>"Applebloom has it, I swear to Celestia!"
"SWEAR TO ME!"
>You drop her over the edge and watch as the cable goes taut(?).
>She starts to dangle there.
>"Somepony, help! Please!"
"Stay there."
>Running the way Applebloom left, you realise she was heading towards the farm.
>Getting to the farm, you get there in record time, you see her heading into the barn.
"Good little rat."
>Running in, you see one thing.
>Applebloom shocked by what she sees.
>Her brother balls deep in Applejack.
"..."
>"Uhh, hey Applebloom."
>Mac nods to you, "Anon."
"Mac, nice to see you, how, uhh, how ya doin'?"
>"Was about tah blow mah load, until lil' bloom came in, then you."
"Well..."
>Applebloom is still scared stiff.
"I'm just going to borrow her for a minute."
>"Why do yah need tah do thaht?"
"She has my last adult magazine."
>Mac simply closes his eyes and nods.
>Applejack, however, "Why did y'all take the magazine?"
>"We wanted our Cutie marks ihn reading ahdult magazines."
>Dragging her out, you yell.
"WHERE IS IT!?"
>"Last ah saw, Sweetie had it!"
"You better not be lying."
>Dropping her, you race towards Ponyville towards Carousel Boutique.
"Time for the final boss."
>Arriving at the boutique, you enter and see Rarity.
>"Anon, darling, whatever are you here to do?"
"Tell me where your little demon sister is, you marshmallow whore."
>She looks taken back, "She's u-upstairs."
>Kicking in the door, you look at the small filly.
"WHERE IS IT, YOU LITTLE SHE-DEMON?"
>She's scared by your yelling and flings your magazine into the air.
>Doing a slow-motion jump into the air, you scream.
"NOOOOO!"
>"Anon, how are you making the magazine and yourself move that slow?"
>Catching the magazine, you land on both of your feet, and do a little move.
"I got it, you little whore. Mission accomplished."
>Suddenly, Pinkie on your ear piece, "Good job, Anon, now get back to base for a good payment."
"Well, seeya bitch, time for some good times."
>Arriving back at your house, you place the magazine in its case and carry Pinkie up to your room.
>"So, Anon, how was your day?"
"Ehh, it was about the most normal day for me while living with you."
>You and Pinkie then cuddled for the rest of the night.
>Today was a normal day, in the life of you.
>Fuckin' Anonymous.