>Once you and Dash pick out a good (read: hilariously bad) film, you put it in the disc tray and sit down on the couch, between Pinks and Flutters
>You set a bowl of popcorn in front of you, picking up a hoof-full.
>Jesus christ these magnetic hooves are some kind of magic bullshit.
>Raising your hoof, you pop it in your mouth as the opening credits start
>You don't really recognize the title, but the words "Starring: Neighcolas Cage" put your mind at ease
>You stretch out as much as you can without tipping over the popcorn and yawn, relaxing
>It always feels weird to just relax after something heavy goes down. You lean back and on to Flutters' shoulder. She smiles and leans back
>'Anon. Don't let this get weird.' The message is loud and clear in your mind
'No problem'
>As you say that, Pinkie leans into you, resting her head on your shoulder. Dash's eye twitches as she looks down to her
>"Whaat? I was feeling left out!"
>Rainbow grunts and puts up with it, adjusting to be more comfortable.
>Your eyelids start to feel heavy, and you cuddle deeper within them. The sun coming through the windows warm you comfortably
>Before you know it, you feel yourself slipping out of consciousness.
>The last things you hear are Rainbow's words; "Oop, uh, I think Anon is out cold."
 
 
>You wake up some time later, walking out the front door and waving to Pinkie as she steps in her hot air balloon
>"See ya, Pinks!"
>"Byee!" She descended under the porch.
'BOO, BITCH'
>Rainbow screams and jumps up, her wings spasming in weak flaps. "What the heck?!"
>Fluttershy gasped. "What's wrong, Rainbow?"
>Dash groaned. "Anon is up. I knew it was too good to be true."
 
 
 
 
>Once the balloon completely sinks below the house, you sit and stare out into the horizon for a bit, watching clouds float past
>The wind had picked up since you fell asleep, and it was blowing your mane to the side
>Feels good, man.
"Hey Rainbow, when I become a jar changeling, would you mind if I stole your rainbow motif?
>"Yes."
"Fuuuck."
>You sigh and look to the ground
"Now I have to. And then I'll be the faggot."
>Being an asshole aint easy.
>Fluttershy clears her throat. "I would kind of mind, too."
>Oh, right. She probably isn't gay for Dash either.
>Probably.
"Fiiine."
>The conversation sort of dies for a minute, and you just sit and enjoy watching the sky slowly roll by
>'Do you wanna fly or something?'
>You jump off the porch
>You enjoy falling for a moment before Dash opens her wings and glides back up, getting level with the horizon
>The wind pushes you around a little, but her years of experience seems to come in handy at riding out the gusts
>A loop and a twirl later, your smile was back in full force, and you couldn't help but giggle like a child
>"Ya think that's cool? Watch this!"
>She shot straight down, in a barrel roll, until the ground started to come dangerously close, and she opened her wings
>The force of the fall suddenly came to a near stop, your wings straining to keep still under the pressure, and then shot up
>Each loop you take going back up, you can see the rainbow trail behind you growing longer and brighter
>By the time you shoot over the house, and fall back down to the doorstep, you're nearly coated in the stuff. Fluttershy claps
"Shiiit! That was awesome!"
>"Hah, I'd do a sonic rainboom, but it'd probably break windows all around town."
>Eventually the glow stops, and the fatigue catches up, causing a nice burning across your body. Flutters stands up
>"That was good, Dash! I'll have to get back to my animals, though. I'll see you tomorrow!"
>"Alright, see ya 'Shy!"
"Can't wait!"
 
 
 
>"Bye Dash, Anon! Have a good day!" She waved, and floated off the house back towards her cottage
"You too!"
>You start to turn back inside, when you hear the sound of someone clearing their throat.
>Dash slowly turns back to see Cloudkicker's very annoyed visage
"Busteeeed..."
>You mutter under your breath, looking from side to side
>"Rainbow Dash."
>"Heh-heyyy, what's up?"
>"A lot of clouds. That you were supposed to clear out."
>You look up. Yep. There's some clouds.
>"Aw come on, what's the big deal if a few clouds give ponies shade?"
>"The big deal is it's your job! There's still bits of mud all over town that haven't dried up."
>Ugh. Lectures are the fucking worst.
>Dash sighs. "Sure thing, I'll get them."
>"Hold on, now. Listen, you've got to stop bailing on this stuff, we all have jobs to do!"
"I feel like I'm in the fucking Elder Scrolls."
>
>Oh, you said that out loud. Well, no harm in continuing now.
"You know what my job is? I saved the world, what, 5, 6 times now?"
>You point at her, her jaw slowly lowering in shock.
"'We all have jobs to do' my ass. Your fucking name is Cloudkicker, you couldn't do it yourself?"
>"Excuse me?! Just because my name--"
"No. Fine, I'll do it."
>"Listen to me--"
"I can't do this with you right now. I'm a fucking plane-crossing lich. You can suck it."
>You blast off into the air, heading up to the high-flying clouds
>Once you get over the top of them, out of earshot, Rainbow breaks out laughing. "Holy moley, Anon, that was amazing."
"Sorry, when I get caught being an asshole to someone important I kind of just keep running my mouth"
>She rolls her eyes and starts clearing the cloud. "Nah, don't worry about it. It's not like she can fire me. I'm half the on-call weather team.
>"Besides, I can just explain to her that it was you. Not the first time I've magically turned into someone completely different."
 
 
 
>Before long, most of the clouds are cleared out, and you slowly drift down, through a window into the house
>Rainbow grabbed a glass of water, and floated up through the floor, placing it on the desk.
>She flopped onto the bed and picked up the Daring Do book, flipping the pages to her bookmark
>You both hadn't actually got much reading yesterday, spending most of the time talking. It was still fun, though.
"So is Daring Do afraid of snakes too?"
>"Pshh, she's not afraid of anything!" She scratches her chin. "Although she does hate snakes."
"Fuck that, snakes are adorable."
>Dash hums and nods in agreement, beginning to read. You settle back and merely catch glimpses of the movie playing in Dash's imagination
>As much as you want to stare through the window at the sky, that would kind of fuck the whole situation
>So you settle for just replaying the memories fresh in your mind
>The shining sky and clouds at daytime, the dark forboding storm below at night, the whistling in your ears.
>You kind of get why Rainbow is such a jock-y type, now. It's really fucking fun to fly
>And the clouds, sky, even the ground below, are all so eye-catching
>Feels good to be the pegasus master race.
 
>Before you know it, it's already tomorrow morning. You wake up first, with Rainbow still snoring in a deep slumber
>It was cute when Fluttershy did that
>Now it just feels like you're constantly about to hock a loogey.
>Eventually it rouses you enough to take control of the breathing and get out of bed.
>Now's the perfect time to rifle through her shit
>You grin and pump your arm back. Man, it's good to wake up evil
 
 
 
>You immediately open her bedside table's drawer, searching for the all encompassing diary every cartoon character has for some reason
>Sadly, you don't find any. You do find a picture of her as a filly with Fluttershy, the latter in braces. Cute, BUT NOT EVIL ENOUGH
>You see a bag, slightly opened enough to see some bits inside. Too evil, you just want to fuck with her
>How the hell would you even get away with it, anyways?
>Otherwise, it's various childhood knick-knacks that you presume have personal value to her. Nothing embarassing enough to hold over her
>You open the drawer under it, just finding a folder full of various papers. Bills and shit. Stupid adult stuff
>Not the fun kind of adult stuff.
>You slide both shut, and take a walk to her dresser, opening the top drawer
>Old scarves and winter coats. Blech.
>You have to jiggle open the next drawer, seeming to be somewhat stuck
>Oh yeah, now we're getting to it.
>Socks. Noice.
>Most are striped too. Even better
>You shove it closed, though. The fuck would you even do with them? Wear them and stare at yourself in the mirror?
>Yes. Yes you would. So it's better to close it now and save yourself the embarassment and betrayal.
>You open the next, and it's back to boring weatherpony gear and wonderbolts costume
>Is this even real or just a halloween costume she couldn't help but buy for desperate fetishistic pleasure?
>"It's real, but I do stare at myself in the mirror sometimes."
>You yelp and jump, fur standing on end.
"OH FUCK! Jesus, Rainbow! You almost gave yourself a heart attack."
>"Why are you going through my stuff?"
"I wanted to find a diary of yours and torment you throughout the day about it."
>She sighs. "Yeah. I would have done the same. But then again, who the heck has a diary?"
>Good point.
>Still, though, you want at least something to ruin her day up until the point you're forcefully evacuated.
>She stretched and yawned. "Just be yourself, Anon."
 
 
 
 
>You :^) internally
>After having breakfast and brushing your teeth, you jump outside and float around the house for a while
>Dash pushes it back into place, which actually seems incredibly easy. Though it's probably harder when there's other things in the sky
>After a few lazy tricks and stretching out your muscles, she decides to fly down
'Awww. I was enjoying that.'
>"Yeah, well you'll be able to fly no problem on your own, right?"
>You smile.
'Yeah. Yeah I suppose I will.'
>You guess you could just switch between pony and human.
>But you would never forgive yourself if you were a human with wings.
>It's bad enough making a OC pony, let alone being that big of a weebshit
>"Oh, yeah! Were you able to fly when you were alive?"
'Well, yes, technically. We used machines.'
>"Cool. How fast did they go?"
'Uhh, like, 20 miles per hour.'
>"That's pretty fast for a machine! I'm a teeensy bit faster, though." She snickered at her own sarcasm.
>You feel like giving the actual answer would be going too far. You don't want to break her poor cunty heart.
>Besides, you've grown fond of her gloating. It's like she's all of the asshole of you, but none of the self hate.
>You'd admire that if she weren't such a huge faggot
>Landing perfectly, Dash starts towards the castle.
'Hey wait, it's not noon yet.'
>"Yeah, but I'd like to get this over with before someone can whine to me about not enough shade or not enough sun or whatever."
'Isn't it a weekend?'
>She shrugged. "Weather doesn't stop on the weekends. The job has a lot of benefits, though, so it works out."
'Yeah, like you ditching it every day.'
>She nodded and rang the doorbell. "Yeah, mostly that."
>The door opened to reveal Spike in a chef's outfit. "Oh, hey Dash. Twilight is eating right now, but I'm sure she wouldn't mind--"
"Why are you such a bitch?"
 
 
>
"Stop just doing everything for her. As hilariously inept as she is, there are some lessons she has to learn herself."
>You lean in
"If you didn't cook for her, she would literally fucking starve to death. You have all the power in this relationship, but you do not use it."
>You walk past him.
"A shame your morals hold you back."
>
>"H-hi, Anon!"
"Sup, dragonbro."
>'You scare me sometimes, Anon.'
>Good.
'I have a backup plan to condition all the minor characters to overthrow the princesses in a murderous yet righteous fury. Just in case."
>'...Minor characters?'
>You turn into the dining room, where Twilight is reading some kind of tome and eating toast
"Hey chucklefuck, how's the spell going?"
>"Pretty well. Should be done in an hour or so."
"Catch ya later, faggot."
>"W...wow." Rainbow looked between Twilight and her own hooves. "You guys...do this stuff all the time, or something?"
>
>You turn around and start to walk back out the castle.
>"Wait, what the hay--"
"Dash, Dash, don't worry your cute normie skull. It's a language held between all my people."
>"The fat annoying outcast virgins?"
"Yeah, those."
>You exit, Spike still in deep thought at the door, and take flight.
>It's a good day to piss off background ponies.
>As you idly glide by, you see the occasional pony on the streets, walking between shops
>Most this fucking city is shops.
>How much disposable income do these fucks have?
>Then again, considering the inflation caused by Rarity, they probably just took a "Eh, fuck it" approach and stopped giving a shit.
>That's what you would do if...actually that's what you would do in any situation.