>tfw formless
>What's the deal with time and space?
>You can measure distance by time, uh, how far away is it. Like, 30 minutes
>But you can't do the opposite. How long have you been dead? 3 miles?
>What kind of sense does that make.
>"Um...I-I'm not sure." A voice rings out in your head
>Yeah. That's what they all say.
>Wait what
"Who the hell are you?"
>Up until now your eyes were unfocused as you were preeetty sure you were super dead
>You can now see the ruins of the east wing of Twilight's stupid castle around you
>Why weren't you brought before the alicornining
>A squeak escaped from under you. "I'm Fluttershy. Who are you?"
>You look down
>You have a muzzle
>shieeeeet
"Bitch I aint telling yo--"
>You look down to where you think the voice came from
>You see pink hair curling next to your yellow leg
"Oh. Oooooh."
>Suddenly, a blast of bright magic and a disturbed purple face enter your view
>"Fluttershy!" Twilight cries out. "I'm so glad you're okay! Did we get the ghost?"
>Oh yeah, that's right. You drank the bleach, and went to equestria
>Turns out you stay dead when you go
>You had spent the last month haunting/annoying twilicorn
 
 
>"I'm not sure! I think he's near us! I'm jumping more than usual...and I jump a lot..."
>oh this is just too good. You try to contact her mentally
"No, I'm totally still here."
>Twilight and Fluttershy both jump, and you feel your teeth slightly clip your tongue
>You never talked much in life, and after being a ghost for a while you're really not used to speaking aloud.
>wait you're speaking aloud. Oh THIS is just too good
>"Y-y-yoinks!" Pinkie cries out from some unseen crack in the wall, before disappearing, causing the rubble to fall to the side
>All the main 6 are revealed behind it, jaws agape
>Then again, you never really fucked with yellowquiet.
>She didn't take it well, and you weren't THAT big of an asshole
>Alright, game's up.
"I think you fucked up the process of an exorcism. You're supposed to get me out, not further in."
>okay
>it's only a little up
>Fluttershy screeched and covered her mouth, falling to the floor.
>Rarity nearly fainted, and Rainbow donned a bewildered look,
>Half amused at hearing her childhood friend swear for the first time in forever
>Half protective
>"What the hay are you doing in there, ghost!" She hovered up in to the air. "Get out!"
"Alright, alright."
>You wave your hand
>Hoof
>whatever.
>
>Uhhh
>Why aren't you out yet?
>"Well?!" Rainbow asked worriedly. "Is he gone, Fluttershy?"
>"I don't think so..." She moved her appendage, testing it out.
>You moved it back, and she froze.
"Hm. Not looking great, guys. To be fair, I've never posessed anyone, so this is new to me too."
 
 
>"You're just tryna trick us!" Applejack said, glaring daggers.
>Fluttershy shrunk under the gaze, and applepone softened her stare.
"No, really guys. As much as I'd like to have a body again, I don't want to share it. Twilight, are you sure you didn't cast the spell in reverse?"
>"Never! I performed the exorcism to the letter!" She immedietly pulled out the spellbook and started flipping through it.
>Pinkie and Rarity looked over it with her.
>The hell is Pinkie going to do. She's not a wizard.
>'She's helped out with magic spells a lot!' You heard a defensive tone echoing through your ears.
>OH MAN
>YOU CAN TALK THROUGH MIND THOUGHTS
>Oh this is an amazing opportunity
>You could say ANYTHING
>You feel a subtle shiver go through your shared body, and feel slightly ashamed
'Sorry, I'm not trying to haunt you specifically.'
>"Then why would you haunt my friends?" She questioned assertively, causing the others to look at her. She gave a nervous smile and blushed
>"Um, s-sorry, talking with...Excuse me, what's your name?"
"Just call me Anon. Or ghost. Or spookmaster."
>You scratch your chin.
"Hell yeah. I like Spookmaster."
>Fluttershy winces and covers her mouth again.
>'Please don't make me say rude things like that' She pleaded
'Yeah, no problem.'
>Though now that you could physically interact with them, there were some pretty rude things you wanted to say
>You'll just have to be subtle
>Pinkie pointed to the book. "Twilight! You got it all wrong! The spell called for HARP feathers, not HARPY feathers!"
>"What's a harp feather?" Bookpony twisted her face in confusion
"Look, before we go on some HILARIOUS tangent"
>You roll your eyes as you place emphasis
"We should get someone who knows what they're doing before we mess up more. Like a princess!"
>Twilight puffed up her cheeks. "I am a princess!"
>You twist your head around dramatically
"This...isn't my world."
>You take a deep breath in
"DISSAAPOOINTEEED!"
 
 
>It took a few minutes to explain that was a joke
>"Alright, I know what we have to do to get you two seperated." Twilight pushed up her glasses
>She didn't have glasses
>You just couldn't stop yourself from visualizing her doing it every 3 seconds
>'What a strange thing to think about.' Fluttershy commented.
'You can't stop imagining it now too, can you?'
>Fluttershy was silent
>You took that silence as her agreeing with you
>You did that a lot
>You wonder why you dont have friends
>No time to think about that now!
>Twilight unrolled a small scroll. "I just need all the right ingredients, and it should work fine."
"How long will that take?"
>"I-if you don't mind me asking!" Fluttershy immedietly chased after the end of your sentence
>Twilight smiled. "All the regular ingredients should be here in a week, at most. Other than that, it depends on Pinkie and the feather."
>"I wont let ya down, boss!" Pinkie brought a hoof to her forhead in salute. She leaned in and hugged Fluttershy
>"Don't worry, I'll be as fast as possible! Pinkie promise!"
>Fluttershy smiled and hugged back
>Damn, this is comfy.
>Although you're sure there's a dozen pranks to pull, you cant bring yourself from the embrace until the opportunity is already gone
>Pinkie then rushes out the door, and was gone down the road before you knew it
>What a mysterious creature
>Either way, a week is a long time to be sharing...everything. Though, you suppose you could find worse ponies to spend it with.
>Like Rainbow Dash.
>And Twilight. And Applejack, and Rarity, and--
>Shit, you just realized this is probably the best pony in equestria to be stuck with. Polite and kind all the time, and all that
>You feel your smile widen, though you're not sure quite who did it
"Well...What do we do until then?"
>Twilight pulls out a few beakers and clamps and you don't know what
>"No thank you!"
"No thank you!"
>Both you and Fluttershy shout in unison. Twilight sighs and dejectidly puts her tools down.
 
 
>After quickly excusing yourselves, Rainbow Dash refused to leave your side on account of ghost
>To be fair, ghosts are assholes
>You should know
>"So!" Rainbow started, "What are we gonna do?"
>Fluttershy giddily smiled. "I promised Angel that I would make him an extra special salad today, for his birthday!"
>Oh fuck
>Animals
>You hated animals. Or more specifically, they hated you
>You lost track of how many times you've been hit by birdshit, stung by bees, or otherwise harmed for no concievable reason
>'I don't know why they would do that!' Fluttershy frowned. 'They're very nice if you get to know them.'
>No reason at all.
>You remember that one time you fed a squirrel a acorn with a bit of tabasco sauce on it.
"Pfft."
>You grinned, and Fluttershy fought it with a bigger frown.
>Rainbow stopped and stared. "Uhhh, is everything alright?"
"Yeah, just an itch."
>You say as you bring a hoof up and scratch your nose. Smoooooth
>It's like she's not even posessed.
>You walk up to your first booth, selling lettuce and carrots
>Ohhhh man, it's time to haggle
>You did this shit all the time in video games, right, you got this
>Where the fuck is the spinny wheel that abstractly represented social interaction
>Where's the haggle bar
>How does this pony look uglier than a wood elf
>"I would like a head of lettuce and 2 carrots, please!" Fluttershy gave a winning smile.
>The shopkeep grinned back. "Ah, my best customer. That'll be 3 bits."
>Okay, here's where you tell him that's bullshit. 3...2...1
>Fluttershy handed over the bits
>God damnit.
>Alright, next time then.
>As soon as she places the food in her bag, she unfocuses her eyes. 'Please don't.' She whispers in mental speech.
>'It doesn't work out. Ever.'
>Tch.
'Come on, son.'
>'I-...I'm not your child..?'
'Oh yeah? Have you ever seen me in the same room as your parents?'
>Rainbow dash clapped in front of you, and both of you jump. "Hey, is everything alright?"
 
 
 
>"Yes, just got caught up in a conversation, sorry." Fluttershy nodded.
"About how bad she is at the art of haggling."
> Rainbow threw her hooves in to the air. "I know ri--" She stopped herself, and smiled, embarrased. "Eheh, sorry."
>Fluttershy sighed. 'It's going to be one of those days.'
>With a friend like you, it'll always be one of those days.
>Man you're a prick. You sigh happily, but then stop as a twinge goes through your heart.
>You frown, feeling a little bad about your actions.
'Sorry, sorry.'
>Fluttershy nodded, but didn't say anything. Maaaan. You hate having feels.
>On the bright side, being a pone feels nice.
>It's been forever since you've felt the warm wind
>Partially because physical death, partially because the social death before that
>You should get out more.
>Fluttershy's sadness bleeds over. 'I'm sorry too, I forgive you.'
>Wow what a faggot
>Getting all feely.
>That feely feel that feels...feely
>That you are not feeling in return.
>Fluttershy stops walking blinks a few times.
>Shut up. I'm not feeling at all!
'Just buy your vegitables!'
>Fluttershy smiles and prances to the next shop
>While the owner is doing buisness with someone else, Rainbow leans in
>"You uh, you doing alright?"
>"Of course, Rainbow!" Fluttershy replies. "It's strange, but I don't feel so weird about it anymore."
>She waves a hoof. "Besides, I have you to protect me if it gets out of hand, right?"
>Rainbow beams and does a loop. "That's right! If he tries anything I'll kick the ghost right out of you!"
"Oh, let me guess, in 10 seconds flat."
>You say in a mocking tone
>Rainbow stops in mid air and gives a confused expression. "N-no. Do I really say that a lot?"
>Huh. Now that you think about it, she really doesn't.
>Fuck it, still a good burn in your book.
>Meanwhile you can feel Fluttershy worrying about getting " kicked the ghost out of "
 
 
>Once all the ingredients were stored in your bag, the three of you started to walk down the path to the cottage
>You know, come to think of it, you've not used this position to walk yet
"Hey Flutters, stop for a second."
>Rainbow looks over, and Fluttershy stops. "Is everything alright, Anon?"
"Spookmaster."
>Fluttershy frowns. "Um, Spookmaster."
"Nah forget it, that name is fuckin' stupid. ALRIGHT, I wanna move."
>Fluttershy covers her mouth again and clears her throat.
"Sorry, sorry. Now, let's do this sh--shhuuuh, uh, this stuff."
>You put your hoof down
>God damnit. That episode fucking sucked.
>Losing your concentration, you immedietly fall over into the grass
"Pony heads are really heavy."
>You muse as you carefully stand up. Lookin' good.
>You put one in front of the other, and then move your back leg forward
>You look like you're playing twister
>Wait a second, why the fuck are you walking?!
>You flap your wings
>Oh christ that tickles. What the hell are these extra limbs? That they feel really fucking weird.
>You look in a puddle and see your reflection, three limbs  crossing over eachother and one holding your balance to the side, both wings up
'Draw me like one of your french girls.'
>All you feel from your body-partner is confusion
>Rainbow falls to the ground and puts a hoof on your shoulder
>"Uh, Flutters? A-anon? Are you okay?"
"Don't worry, I got this. If there's one thing I got, it's this. I've got it so hard. If I don't got it, I don't even know."
>You tend to babble when doing intensely difficult things
>It's one of your most endearing traits
>"Can you stop that? It's kind of scary..." Fluttershy pleads
>You sigh, and go back to a more average stance.
"Fine. I'll try to observe how you walk instead."
>Fluttershy blushes and instinctively hides under her hair. You don't need to point out how much that doesn't help
>It does make her cuter though.
>
>Yep, she is kind of cute. Yep...
>She isn't moving.
>
>WALK GOD DAMNIT
 
 
>She jolts and begins walking, still trying to hide behind her hair.
>Rainbow raises an eyebrow and crosses her arms mid air
>What a showoff.
>"Is everything alright, Fluttershy? He's not being mean to you, is he?"
>"N-not at all! Don't worry about it."
>"If you say sooo..."
>Rainbow isn't convinced
>Wow, she actually put thought in to something
>You feel a twinge of anger and laugh internally
>A bird flies out of a tree, chirping, and lands on your head
>You grab your rifle
>You remember you don't have a rifle
>You grab a sharp stick
>Fluttershy immedietly bats it out of your hoof and sits down
>"Yes, Mr. Robin?"
>It chirps about something. You aren't sure about all of it, but it ends with "Or I'll follow you home and kill your dog"
>Fluttershy gasps.
>"I'm so sorry! I'll get to it right away!"
>You were right.
>"What happened?" Rainbow asked, foolishly not knowing the extortion plot held from the underbrush to treetops
>"I forgot to feed them this morning! Twilight called me over so quickly I didn't finish feeding everyone."
>This seemed like a flaw in your reasoning, but every good conspiracy has some loophole.
>Fluttershy took flight and rushed there
>By rushed, you mean going slightly faster than jogging.
>It's a good feeling though, brushing falling leaves aside as you " speed " by the trees
>Even though you could technically float around as a ghost, you never really felt anything
>Of course, that also meant you didn't feel the excertion
>The base of her wings burned.
>Damn gurl, exercise more
>She wasn't listening, thankfully. As you turn your attention to her mental state, you suddenly are overcome by worry and embarassment
>You would frown if you weren't already. You felt tears welling behind her eyes
'Hey, man, don't beat yourself up. I've gone without breakfast before, it's not that bad.'
>'It's my responsibility to look after them!' She replied.
>You suddenly realize the only reason this happened was because Twilight needed help dealing with you. Fuuuuuuuck.
>I came here to laugh. Not to feel.