>You wake up in the morning, next to Twilight.
"Good morning, Anonymous."
>Twilight smiles warmly and kisses you awake.
>You turn to the side to see no Rarity in her bed.
>Well... watching someone you've really liked get it on with someone else really hurts...
>thatfeel.jpg
>So, its a good thing that she's not here.
>Hey! What if Spike actually sealed the deal?
>Oh, he owes you big time.
>Even if he didn't.
>Twi and you cuddle for a bit, talking about League strats and how sorry you are for "picking" Rainbow Dash.
>You eventually get out of bed and decide to start the day.
>You pick your shit up off the floor and scurry on over back to your hall, careful not to be spotted by an RA or someone.
>In the lobby, you see Rarity sound asleep on the couch in the outfit she was in from last night.
>So he didn't seal the deal. Wonder what went wrong?
>Naked "good mornings" are almost always a bad idea, so you use your common sense and dip.
>Back in your room, you see Spike, silently playing League.
>Taking a better look at him, it looks like he's been up all night.
>Eyes bloodshot red and... puffy?
>Was he crying?
>What a pussy.
>You see his character die a few times, and him sniffle an equal amount of times.
 
A. Don't mention anything about last night, just ask to play with him.
B. Question about last night.
C. Work/study
D. Get some breakfast
 
>We breakfast first. It'll be quicker.
>You're not feeling like dining hall food, so you cook your regular eggs in the lobby.
>The sound of sizzling from the kitchen stirs the purple haired beauty from the couch.
"Mmgh... A-anonymous?"
>You've got a plate of eggs in hand as Rarity bids you a good morning, not telling you anything about last night.
>She's walking in a straight line and not groaning, so, you're pretty sure she's fine...
>You bring the plate back into your room and you eat your eggs.
>Spike finishes up his game, so you start your laptop up and you get on League.
>You tell him to wait for you.
"Hmm huh? Wut?"
>He sounds dead.
>You invite him to a unranked game, just to save your ELO.
Also, thanks guys who played League with me.
>You ask him if you can play ADC, and you pick one.
>He auto locks another ADC at the same time you do.
>WTF bro.
>The game starts.
>He's not leashing for the jungle, he's not CSing...
>He didn't even buy items.
>Wow... what happened last night?
>He starts to attack their tower as you repeatedly tell him to retreat.
>And he dies...
"DUDE What the FUCK, man? We coulda got that one!"
>Ffffff.... deep breaths.
>Remember. Rage loses games.
Life Lessons with OPtimistic
>Needless to say, you lost the game.
>Spike looks dead.
 
A. Press him about last night.
B. Keep playing.
C. Ask Rarity
D. Hang out in the lobby.
 
>Alright you're gonna figure out what the hell went down yesterday.
>CU Mysteries: Mystery of the Sunday Funday.
>Starring the Hardy Bros and Nancy Drew.
>You ask Spike the most thoughtful and answer-yielding question you can think of.
>What happened last night?
"S-she... Rarity's a bitch!"
>Rarity's not a...
>Well....
>She....
>Eh, maybe.
>What happened last night?
>Because asking the same question will get you different answers.
"We... we went to the party, and Rarity looked really bored."
>Egh, considering how refined she is, she's probably not much of a party animal.
"So... I asked her to dance. She didn't want to at first, but eventually Pinkie coaxed her to stand up and dance with me."
>Nice... so he got some reluctant booty.
>Did he see you punch Flash?
"Huh? What? Oh yeah, nice job, dude."
>Hell yeah it was.
"A-anyways... Rarity was dancing... but y'know... not. So after a bit she smiled at me and goes outside. She looked really down so I sat with her."
>She's probably down because she knew you got her out of the house so you could fuck Twilight.
>She was only half right.
"So... then, I... tried to... comfort her."
>He starts choking up.
"Told her how she should be having fun... and I kinda told her that I really like her. Then I tried to kiss her and..."
>He's crying now.
"She broke my heart!"
>He goes to crying on his bed.
 
A. Comfort Spike
B. Get Rarity's story.
C. Get mad at Rarity.
D. Work/Study
 
>You were never really a good bro.
>Most of your high school friends never had any problems like this so you really can't do much.
>But dammit, you're going to try.
>Bros dont let bros... be... um... sad.
>brocode.com
>You tell him how you know that feel, bro. And you pat him on the shoulder.
>He gets up, sobbing.
"T-thanks bro..."
>Cutscene activated
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BeUhmtIUg7Y
>Otacon's such a pussy.
>Spike doesn't seem to cheer up immediately, but at least he stopped being a pussy bitch who uses tears.
>Tears are for queers.
>So he goes back to his computer to play League.
 
A. Join in with him
B. Get the Rarity story
C. Get angry at Rarity
D. Hang out in the lobby.
 
>Rarity... gotta find Rarity.
>You head over to the girls' hall, asking Twilight to let you into her room.
>Upon entering the room, you find both girls working quietly at their desks.
"Good morning, Anonymous."
>Rarity looks like she's sketching some design, and Twilight is making 3-D models of some protein.
>You jump on Twilight's bed and ask Rarity casually about how last night went.
"It was a pleasant night... I had a blind date and I didn't even get to sleep in my own bed."
>Thanks Obama.
>You sense sarcasm, so you hold the Y button down and scream "Hold it!" into the mic.
>Oh, but your mic is broken... you press the L button instead.
"Oh... don't get me wrong, Anonymous. I did indeed have a fun night. Spike had fun too. Thank you for making me go."
>You go through your Court Record, find a bottle of Spike's tears and press the X button.
>You object. Spike actually told you that Rarity WASN'T having fun, and he was devastated! Now what did she really do?
>She sighs and gives you basically the same story, up until the point when she went outside.
>She even mentions that she was feeling down, causing you to smile because your swag knows no bounds.
"Spike followed me outside and tried to make me feel better, and he's a sweetheart for doing that..."
>So... what's different?
"He puckered his lips and started leaning closer! I was not going to kiss him or anything of that sort... So I told him that I only liked him as a friend, and not in the way that he wanted. He became really sad and avoided me the rest of the night. Also, I can't believe you hit that ruffian frat boy, Flash Sentry!"
>Twilight blushes and looks away.
>You proceed to tell Rarity how you found Spike this morning, and what condition his condition was in.
"Oh my... I had no idea I broke his poor little heart that strongly..."
>Yeah, he was pretty fucked up.
"I-I'm sorry, Anonymous... I just... maybe I wanted someone to know how I was feeling..."
>Anon, pulling bitches since 199X
 
A. Get Rarity to talk to Spike.
B. Drop the case now and go for hot fudge sundaes.
C. Go hang out in the lobby and invite/call _______
 
>You tell Nancy Drew to go down to the campus store and pick up some ice cream for you.
>Because now... it's time for some closure.
>The Hardy Boys follow her out of the dorms and you tell Rarity that she absolutely has to talk to Spike now.
>She sighs and apologizes, then tells you to call her when Spike's ready.
>By the time you make it back into your room, Spike's still playing League.
>He wins his game and smiles contently as you walk in...
>So content that it's almost gay.
>You resist the urge to kiss him in excitement because that's totally faggot.
>You tell him that... Rarity wants to talk to him.
>His smile dies into a serious face.
"No... forget her... if she doesn't wanna like me that way, so be it!"
>She wants to apologize... for giving him the hurt.
"Nope! I'm staying here."
>Minutes later... you speak up.
>There's gonna be ice cream!
"Oh boy!"
 
>Rarity and Spike sit in the lobby, as you, Nancy Drew, and the Hardy Boys eat some of the ice cream.
"Spike... don't get me wrong... you're the sweetest guy I know apart from Anon, at least, and any girl would be lucky to have you... It's just... that I'm not sure if I'm ready for anything like that..."
"R-ra-rararara"
>Sobs coming... but he's trying his best to fight it.
"I... know exactly how you feel, Spike... I, too, have been a victim of unrequited love... It hurts... a lot, at first. but you learn to deal with it. Your heart grows stronger, and you become a better person... and who knows? Perhaps, I'm not the one for you, and there lies out there a girl who's right for you and is better than m- Ahahaha, well... of course, no one is better than me."
>Spike smiles and laughs weakly while Rarity concludes.
"Are... we okay?"
>Spike nods and Rarity scoops him into a hug.
>You turn to your detective friends, as you see them fade out of existence, bit by bit, fiber by fiber.
>They wave meekly a final goodbye to you.
>Their faces show an expression of sadness, but acceptance.
>They vanish without a trace.
>Leaving only a tub of ice cream and a bottle of hot fudge.
>You know what to do.
>You make a couple bowls for the two bitches sitting in the lobby talking about their problems and one for yourself in honor of fallen detective homies.
>After scarfing it all down to celebrate a case well closed, you look in the tub to find you have enough for one last sundae.
 
>You text Rainbow to meet you outside.
"Sure thing, Anon~ Heehee."
>Oh no... is she?
>Rainbow slowly trudges outside, limping slightly.
>Dashie?
"Nope, try again dude!"
>Whew, it's Rainbro.
>You hand her the sundae.
"Sweet, thanks! We're even now. Your eggs yesterday were shit."
>She fists you. You fist her back.
>And Dashie is somewhere wishing you'd fist her instead.
>She crashes on the couch, scoopin' dat sundae.
>Lol guys... I totally just realized something.
>SUNDAES ON A SUNDAY, AM I A FUCKING GENIUS WRITER OR WHAT
 
A. Keep hanging with her.
B. Go back to your room to work.
C. Gym it up.
 
>Good thing you sprinkled a bit of protein in Dash's Sunday sundae.
If ever you have protein powder, try to think of creative ways to put it into your meals/desserts.
>You invite her to the gym with you.
"Well, y'know... I can't run, but I guess I'll go with you."
>She finishes her sundae and goes to get ready.
>After jumping out of your shorts and a t-shirt into another pair of shorts and a new shirt, you head out to the lobby to find... Dash in a training bra and short shorts, hair pulled back in a ponytail.
>Ready to go, Rainbro?
"Rainbro's not... But I am... most... definitely... ready, Anon~"
>Oh jeez.
>You take Dashie over to the gym, walking along side as she keeps scoping you out.
>And before you head in, you give Dashie one hell of a deep kiss, krumping in her mouth with your tongue.
Here's looking at you, NBS.
"Whew... thanks for that, dude."
>You two commence your workout.
>Arms, legs, and abs. There is no rest for you.
>While you're working one, you can rest the other two. Think of it that way.
>It's good to see Rainbow Dash actually running again too.
 
>You finish your workout and head out with your bro, as she chuckles at some joke you made about Sunday sundaes.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't my favorite little bitch... Anonymous."
>Sentry... and his goon squad... of goons!
>Fuck, your arms are tired.
>You also just remember... you didn't do cardio today.
 
A. Parkour it back to safety.
B. Knuckle up.
C. Diplomacy.
 
>You make a fist. What the fuck did he say about you, that little bitch?
"Anon..."
>Dash holds you by the wrist, looking scared at you.
"Ohooo, check this out, boys. Anon's girlfriend's trying to hold him back."
"I'm NOT his girlfriend!"
"Oh yeah, because that cute nerdy slut Twilight is tooootally Anon's girlfriend."
>You make another fist and look at Dash.
>You fist her and assume the Double Dragon stance.
>You guys worked on it... never.
>One of the goonsquad is first to throw the punch.
>Dash is agile enough on a hurt ankle to dodge it.
>You? Not so much.
>You get caught with a fist in the chin. Luckily you took it straight instead of a hook, so your head doesn't reel and you don't die.
>You're shaken for a bit before you're back in stance.
>Rainbow looks busy.
>Flash comes charging at you so you duck his grab, and shove a goon off Rainbow.
>Rainbow gets grabbed from behind, leaving you 1v1 with Flash.
>What did self defense say?
>Scanning...
>selfdefense.exe is a go
>Swat the fly. Draw the sword. You've parried two strikes.
>Wrist control. This is the closest you've been to holding hands with a guy.
>And finally.
>Sweep the leg.
>Flash is on his ass.
>You're the best... around. nothing's ever gonna kee-
>You're grabbed from the back.
>Nothing a Dash kick won't solve.
>Hey, you guys won!
>Didn't even use your crane kick.
"Let's go, Anon..."
>You make it back to the dorms, watching your back the whole time, making sure you don't get ganked by Flash's jungler.
>Rainbow's kit also doesn't have a lot of good peel for you.
>Come to think of it, you only know 2 other people who play League.
>How are you gonna make a ranked team?
>And your Cawadoodie team too?
>Didn't you say you wanted to start a band?
>What the hell, Anons? Where are your dreams?
>Didn't you know? Courage is the magic that turns dreams into reality.
>Ah well, those are problems for a later date.
>You see Twilight and Fluttershy taking Winona for a walk.
"We're gonna be gone for a bit, going to the grocery store in the city. Need anything?"
>Eggs. Eggs. Eggs. Protein.
"Sure thing! You be good, Anon."
>Twilight kisses you softly before heading off.
>You go inside and make the brotein juice.
>You hand RD the shake.
>Time to freshen up.
>You want to borrow her shampoo again.
"You can actually share the shower if you wanna~"
>Dashie's back.
 
A. Decline. Too dangerous. Sun's still up.
B. Accept. Twilight's out... who's gonna know?
 
>Yes.
>Yes.
>Absolutely all the yes.
>Need some water there, Anon?
>You seem kinda thirsty.
>Fuck you writer, there's water enough in that shower.
>Dashie grabs your arm a la Twilight as you guys walk into the girls hall.
>To be honest, you just want the God Shampoo.
>You walk into the shower first to avoid suspicion.
>After a matter of minutes she jumps in as well and starts the shower.
"Mmmn~ Anonny."
>She starts undressing you and herself, kissing your neck as you go.
>You tell her to keep it down, lest you suffer the wrath of suspicion.
>She reassures you that the shower fall is loud enough to drown out the sound.
>Well... the best you can do is keep it down yourself, to make sure no one knows you're here.
 
>In a matter of minutes you're fucking Dashie, standing doggie style.
>Her hands are pressed against the shower wall as she is slightly bent over to accommodate your entry.
>It's really wet in here.
>Did you know that it's actually harder to maintain a boner whilst standing and whilst wet?
>But it's too good for any of that to make any sense.
>She feels too good.
"Aannhh~ Anon!"
>You look at Rainbow's hair as you thrust.
>You'd expect to see the color wash out or something, but it stays a rainbow.
>Odd... also, distractions help your stamina.
>Knocking.
>FAPCON 1, ABORT ABORT.
"Rainbow Dash? Are you okay in there?"
>Sounds like Rarity.
>Fuck. If you can hear her, that means she can hear you and Dash!
>Logic, right?
>But you've been quiet so you have nothing to worry about.
"Mmmnn~ yessss... ahem ahem I mean...uh, Yeah I'm all good in here."
>All of the sudden, it doesn't feel that great anymore.
"I thought I heard you crying in there!"
"W-w-what? I don't cry! Dash never cries!"
>You're still inside her. You give a quick little hump to keep you going.
"Mmn~ Anon..."
"Anonymous is in there with you?"
"Um~ uh.... no! Nobody's in here. I'm uh... well... it's not Anon... it Amo-"
>You reach out of the shower and dry your hands before sending Rarity a text that you want to hang out with her after you finish taking a shower, and you tell her to meet her in your room.
>Master fucking plan.
>You've saved Dash the trouble of explaining how she masturbates to that one bloodbender from the new Avatar.
>You lean over her shoulder, still inside her and you kiss her neck.
"Alrighty, dude... let's get out of here."
>There's no getting Dashie back now.
>You see that one color between purple and green on Dash's head?
>Same color as your balls.
>You apply the Strawberry Shamp on you and Dash and finish washing up... as bro-fully as possible.
>Dash dries up and leaves the shower first, and you do the same minutes later to avoid any suspicion.
>AJ spots you leaving the shower but you immediately tell her how you wanted to use Dash's shampoo.
>She smells you and compliments you on your taste.
>You peek your head in Dash's room as she's getting dressed, and leave with a quick "sweet dreams baybeeee" before you get guillotined by the closing door.
"It's only 7!"
>Back at the boys' hall, you walk into your room, q-tip in ear.
>Rarity is sitting behind Spike, watching him play League.
"Oh, hello there, Anonymous."
>She bought it. Master plan complete.
 
A. League with your bro
B. Get to work
C. Chat with Rarity.
 
>You ask the two of them initially how they liked their Sunday sundaes.
"Oh... that's clever."
>is all i wanna hear from you guise pls ;_;
>You start telling Rarity all about how you and Spike are superbros and you play League together a lot.
"It looks like a very fascinating game. Extremely well designed art for the characters."
>You show her Nidalee's old splash art.
>She throws up.
>I mean seriously, its just her standing there. How lazy can you get, Riot?
>You ask her if she wants to learn.
>In a half hour, she's sitting behind the both of you as you two 1v1 as Ashes
>You start telling her how a big part of the game is making money, then you tell her how important making money is in League of Legends.
>Your swag swag like Caillou.
>She seems to be leaning toward your desk moreso than Spike's.
>Spike overextends and you fire the Crystal Arrow.
>Rarity is dazzled at the crystalness.
>You follow it up with a Volley and turn your Q on. Spike dies.
>You have her full attention now.
>Spike's lookin' mad brah.
 
A. Toss the game.
B. Keep winning.
C. Let Rarity try.
 
>You get up out of the chair and tellforce Rarity to try.
>It's really awkward seeing her use a mouse.
>She misses a lot of CS and doesn't take advantage of any trade opportunities.
>What a fucking noob!
>You swear, she's a fucking feeder noobfaggot trash toxic ELO hell report gg /ff
>Lol not really.
>I mean, she's not a Siren. But she understands the concepts of spacing and positioning very well.
>She is playing on the safe side though, and you look at Spike's screen to see that he's raking in the money.
>Spike gets a kill on Rarity, and you smirk and shake your head.
>They continue on playing.
>Crap... Rarity's on your computer. You can't work... well not alone at least.
 
A. Coach Rarity.
B. Coach Spike.
C. Go find Applejack to study/work
 
>You haven't been the least productive this whole weekend.
>Anon's of the school week would scorn you right about now.
>You text Appajack to get the books out to the lobby.
>It's studyin time.
>You leave the one way relationship to fester away in your room as you carry your books out to the lobby.
>Applejack meets you minutes later in short shorts and a white shirt.
>She's missing her trademark hat, and instead her hair is in two pigtails, with braided ends.
"Howdy Anon! Ready to study?"
>You crack open a soda from the fridge and bring the bag of chips over, while she opens the books and sorts out the notes.
>Might as well work it.
>You grab a handful of chips and munch on them as you peer through the chemistry book.
>Applejack asks you a question about the laws of thermodynamics.
>You tell her how the first one is how energy cannot be created or destroyed.
>The second how entropy is always increasing.
>From there you tangent onto how the apocalypse is inevitable.
>After entertaining the thought between the two of you, you conclude that you, AJ and Dash need to stick together.
>Survival of the fittest.
>Applejack slides you back on track to talk about Darwin.
>You casually reply and take a sip from your soda.
>This tangential learning would easily be more effective if you had more people around...
>But the rest of your science buddies haven't made it back yet.
>You continue at the reasonable pace you've set for yourself until Fluttershy and Twilight come home.
>Winona flocks quickly to Applejack, distracting her from the book.
>Twilight puts a paper bag down and you kiss her.
>You take your eggs off of them and stack them in the fridge.
>It's getting pretty late but you don't mind.
>Those will be the best memories.
 
A. Slack off in your room
B. Keep studying
C. Slack off in the lobby.
 
>After helping them with the groceries, Twilight asks if she and Shy can join you with the studying thing.
>In a matter of minutes, the two girls are out in the lobby with books, laptops and iPads.
>Twilight sits next to you and you two lean on each other as you study one sheet of notes.
>You all compare notes and talk about how the chemistry professor has a really weird accent.
>You try first to read his powerpoint in his voice.
>Southern Chijapkorese was never your strong point.
>After sharing a few laughs, you go back to the differentiating between enthalpy, energy, and work.
>Winona curls asleep on Fluttershy's lap, while you go grab some more chips.
>This is super chill. More chill than Chill Penguin.
>Twilight starts up and starts asking the three of you questions, to which the answer comes to you first more often than not.
>You'd say you're pretty prepared for the midterm...
>Then again, it is only day 7.
>Egh... maybe I'll shorten the quarter.
>You take a look at the syllabus.
>Chem midterm is this upcoming Friday.
>Authorial intent, that's why.
>11 PM.
>Dash comes out to play CoD.
 
A. Back to the room. Call it a day.
B. Studyparty
C. Slack off in the lobby.
 
>You tell the girls you're heading back to your room.
>You pick up your books and notes and kiss Twilight's forehead goodnight.
"Good night, Anon!"
>You head back to your room.
>By this time, you're sure Rarity has ruined your MMR in normals.
>Rarity's playing support to Spike's ADC.
>Taric. Of course.
>They don't make this fan art for a reason.
>While she bedazzles her enemies with a stun, Spike picks up the kills.
>They've been winning, according to Spike...
>But y'know what?
>You're tired.
>You tell Rarity as kindly as you can to GTFO, because you're going to bed.
"After this game, Anon! We're gonna take Baron!"
>She's having fun.
>After you crash in your bed, you hear the announcer say Victory.
"Good job, Rarity! Maybe next time we can play a real game!"
>Bots.
 
End day 7.
Day 7 Summary:
Dashie relationship up.
Enemieeed Flash
Gains and Brains.
Resolved Case: CU Mysteries: Mystery of the Sunday Funday.