>"Oh! Anon! I love you, my darling!"
>"And I you, my dear Celestia!"
>"Anon! Kiss me, my love!"
>"Yes, Celestia, it shall be done at once!"
>And then they started making out
>It was all romantic and refined at first
>But then it devolved into a scandalously sloppy makeout session!
>And then who should trot by but Princess Mi Amore Cadenza!
>She was so shocked by the amazing sloppy kissing going on that she gasped loudly.
>"Ah! Cadenza! Would you care to join us? There is plenty of Anon to go around, I do not mind sharing in the slightest!"
>"Why yes, that looks like great fun! I shall join you, indeed!"
>And thus the Princess of Love joined in with the sloppy royal makeout session
>The noise from this amazing session grew loud enough to wake even the great and beautiful Princess Luna, Princess of the Night
>She went to inspect the source of the noise and was utterly amazed at the sight that lay before her!
>They had moved on from mere kissing to outright fornication!
>As the wise Princess Luna turned to leave the depravity before her, her own sister beckoned her to join!
>Princess Luna bravely resisted; but eventually she, too, fell under the human's sexual spell.
>Equestria eventually crumbled without its three Princesses, who became consumed with lust for the human's hot monkey dick.
 
"Oh, yes. This is perfect. We shall post this, at once!"
>Princess Luna pressed the "submit" button
>Surely this was the greatest story ever written, it had everything anyp0ny could want
>Especially that handsome fiend, Anon
>She sighed heavily, praying that Anon would visit her chambers tonight, so that she could show him just what she thought of him...
 
>Elsewhere, Anonymous found himself shuddering, not knowing why.
 
 
[The Next Day]
 
>It's a new bright and cheery day in Equestria
>You are Anonymous, and last night, something weird happened
>Without warning, a wave of cold washed over your body, eliciting a shudder
>It wasn't a cold night, either; it was a fairly warm summer night
>Eventually, you had pushed it aside and gone to sleep
>That was last night, however
>The weird stuff happening today is a different story altogether
>Ponies all over town are giving you weird looks and whispering to each other as you pass
>Every so often, you'd catch the names "Celestia", "Luna", and "Cadence" in those whispered conversations
>You also thought you saw the odd mare or two staring at your crotch
>Every time you turned your head to check, they'd quickly look away
>You couldn't be sure you weren't just seeing things
>Eventually, you reached your destination - Carousel Boutique
>You'd managed to get a job helping Rarity do... whatever
>Some days you'd act as a repairman; others, a gofer; even a maid, a few times
>You didn't mind
>She wasn't too demanding, and she paid well
>Element of Generosity, indeed
>At least, if there was anyone you could count on to be normal around you, it was Rarity
>Well, as normal as a pony fashionista gets, at least
>You knock on the door
>"Coming, darling~"
>The door opens
>And Rarity is staring at you, perfectly silent
 
"What, no 'Anonymous, it's so wonderful to see you,' followed by a list of my tasks for today?"
>"Buh?"
>You give her a concerned look
>"O-oh, pardon me, I sort of lost myself for a minute, there."
>Rarity gives you the nervous smile she uses when she's trying to pretend everything is fine
>"W-well, let's get started! Heh-heh, heh... yes..."
>She clears her throat
>"Today, I'll need you to mount the Prin- er, my new coc- ER, I mean, my new... clock. In the dining room! And then, I was hoping you could use your magic fingers on me- I mean, my sewing... machine. For starters. We'll see who else I need done when you've finished. Your tasks."
"Are you serious?"
>She pushes you toward the dining room
>"Well? That cock isn't going to hang itself up! I MEAN, CLOCK! CLOCK!"
"Rarity, what the fuck is going on here?"
>You scowl at the white marshmallow pony
>She tries desperately to avoid your eyes and maintain her composure
>She's not doing nearly well enough
>Her eyes wander to your crotch
>You snap your fingers a few times, catching her attention once again
"You're going to explain. Now."
>Rarity gulps and sighs
>"Well, there's this... ponynet site I occasionally visit, and..."
 
>Part of you wishes you could just forget everything you learned in the last five minutes
>You probably could have gone without knowing there was a site for user-created erotic stories on the pony internet
>And without knowing that Rarity was a regular visitor to said website
>And without knowing that, since your arrival, there had been a sudden influx of stories starring you
>So many stories, in fact, that they had to add a new fucking category for them all
>...And, best of all, that Princess Luna was a regular contributor to the site
>You gave yourself no points for guessing what her favorite subject was
>At least now you know why you've been hearing the Princesses' names in hushed conversation all day
>And why mares have been glancing at your crotch - speaking of which...
>You tap Rarity on the head
"Eyes up here, Rarity."
>Her ears flatten as she blushes and looks up
>"Sorry, darling."
>You rest your head in your hands
"There's just one thing I still don't get."
>"Excuse me?"
"Why have I been getting weird looks around town? The story's not THAT good. You'd think they actually believe it happened!"
>Rarity cleared her throat and pointed to the screen
>Every one of her stories starring you is tagged with "true event"
>God dammit, Luna