>"Anon. Do you know why you're here?" >Celestia was staring down at you. She looked pissed. Very pissed. Because you wanna fuck? >Her eye twitches. >"No, anon. We do NOT want to "fuck". We are referring to the spectacle that occured in this very castle just yesterday!" >Oh. Right.  Forgot about that.   >....   >This is the best idea you've ever had >It took hours of tinkering, obtaining raw materials, drawing schematics and convincing Twilight to help you, but you finally finished >And now you're enjoying the fruits of your labor >Motherfucking magical Mario Karts. >And what better place to test your racing machines than Canterlot Castle? >"THIS IS MOST FUN!" >A golden carafe zooms past your head, barely missing you. >You turn and shake your fist at Luna. SUNDAY DRIVER!! >You grab one of the bunches of Bananas resting inbetween your legs, and whip it towards her >They spin through the air and smash into the side of Luna's cart, scattering bananas everywhere >One of the bananas splatters under her tires, sending her spinning wildly with a scream into a group of guards >"NOT FUN!!" >You zoom past the pile of dazed guards, dented armor and confused Luna I'MA GONNA WEEN! >You screech gleefully in your best Wario impression >*BEEP* Oh no. >*BEEP BEEP* Oh god. >*BEEP BEEP BEEP* OH MAN. >*BEE- >You and the kart are enveloped in a maelstrom of purple magic and fire FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUU- >Spinning wildly through the air >Bile rises in your stomach >Up is down, down is up >You barely see a purple blur zoom past >Followed by a blue rainbow-streaked blur >Then a gray blur >Then *CRUNCH* >You've landed. Badly. >You pull yourself from the wreckage of kart parts and smushed bananas >Out of the kart, you pull yourself up >And look straight into the gaze of a white alicorn. >"Having fun, anon?" >Oh fuck. >You silently curse the day you decided it was a good idea to tell Twilight Sparkle about Blue Shells.   >....   In all fairness, your majesty, I did get fucked over by your prized student. Surely that's punishment enough? >Celestia is unconvinced. She continues berating you >"As if knocking Luna into a group of royal guards wasn't bad enough, you ruined the Griffon Ambassador's visit!" >Ah. You remember that. >You remember the shocked look on his face as the bundle of bananas collided with his face. >You also remember the angry screech as you zoomed away. >You can't stop yourself from chuckling to yourself as Celestia looks on furiously. >"We are glad you find this funny. We only just barely prevented them from declaring war on Equestria!" >You stop your laughter and put on a srs face I'm sorry, Celestia, I really am. But surely you can see how this somehow your fault? >"What?" Welll.... You left a huge pile of bananas in front of the castle, all the castle hallways are super wide, you've got these ramps in the castle gardens and... >"Anon." Not to mention all the weird- >"ANON!" Wuh? >"Did. You. Touch. The Royal. Banana's?" W-well, yeah, I mean, what did you think we were throwing at each other? >She leans down, pushing her nose up against yours with a face of pure malice. >"You really shouldn't have done that." >Oh shit. >And that's how you ended up on the moon.