>day Work Sucks in Equestria
>you stumble back, exhausted, into your shabby Manehattan apartment
>it's almost midnight, but the kitchen lights are still on
>Coco's sitting at the table, a half-empty mug of coffee and an open Ernest Hemmingneigh book in front of her
>she looks up as you enter and gives you a sweet smile
"Hey Anon.  Why are you home so late?  Rough day at work?"
>instead of answering, you cross the room and wrap your arms around the cream pony, nuzzling your face in her soft fur
>she returns the embrace, her warm breath tickling your neck as she sighs
>after a minute of cuddly silence, she speaks up
"Would you like some dessert, Anon?  I picked up a special treat for us while I was in town."
>"Sounds good.  What is it?"
>you take a seat across from her at the table
>Coco gets up and walks to the pantry
>she returns with two small purple packages in her hooves, and sets one in front of you
>the front shows a muffin flecked with pink
>there's a logo across the top that reads...
"It's Topkek, Anon!"
>okay then
>"What's Topkek?"
"Only the best food ever!", she says as she bites into it
>you're still pretty skeptical
>you look down at the plastic-wrapped snack, then back to Coco
>she's sitting perfectly still, and her eyes have glazed over
>a thin line of drool is hanging out of her mouth
>"Coco?  You okay?"
"Lel Anon, who are you quoting?"
>"Wh-what?"
"Top lel.  Ebin maymay Anon!"
>"Coco, what the hell?  What are you talking about?"
"Rude.  Check your privilege."
>"O...kay.  Anyway, uh, what book is that?"
>Coco gives you a huge shit-eating grin
"Boku no Skrillex"
>"Wait, Skrillex?  How do you know about...?"
>Coco leaps across the table and slams into you
>she grabs your head in her hooves, and twists it around until you're staring at the clock
>the time reads 11:55
>she gestures frantically towards the digits
"Check 'em!   Check 'em!"
>"Get off me, Coco!"
>you pry the mare, whose attention is still focused on the numbers behind you, off your chest
>"Coco, seriously, what's gotten into you?  Do I need to call a doctor?  Answer me!"
>she just starts bonking your head with her hooves and chanting:
"Property of [a/jp]!  Property of [a/jp]!"
>"Ow!  Coco!  Ow!  Stop!"
>you grab her hooves and wrestle her down
"Oh em gee, rude!  Go back to /b/!"
>scooping the pony up, you start to head back to your room
>you ain't dealing with this right now
>Coco, meanwhile, is gibbering at your side
"Everyone says though when I had a mustache I let it be too wide, do you have a grooming guide for them?"
"Is this your fetish?"
"Why do you hate me?"
>her hind legs are kicking furiously, and it's hard to maintain your hold on her
>your wrap one arm around her midsection and use the other to jimmy the door to your bedroom open
"I think I saw a documentary on this once."
>you've given up trying to understand what she's talking about
>you toss Coco onto the bed and, surprisingly, she immediately settles down and curls up on top of the sheets
"This is nice bed."
>"Okay Coco.  I think you need some rest.  If you're not better by tomorrow, I'm going to call a doctor.  You just yell for me if you need anything, okay?"
>she just smiles
>as you turn to leave, though, she speaks up
"Anon..."
>you turn back to her
"Birds are not that important."