>>The following logs contain only relevant conversation
 
>>ANON:Lyra? Are you here?
>>DCRD:Sorry, I'm afraid she's busy at the moment.
>>ANON:And who are you?
>>DCRD:Why, your friendly neighborhood Discord, of course!
>>:ANON:And you have nothing better to do than to troll on a chat site, yeah i can see it.
>>DCRD:Anonymous, you WOUND me! I'm only here to help.
>>ANON:How do you know my full name?
>>DCRD:Who doesn't, really. Anonymous, the star-crossed lover of Lyra Heartstrings! Hopelessly in love with a girl he only met thrice on a chat website from another dimension...not to mention the difference in species, YOWZA!
>>ANON:I'm not in love with Lyra! I'm just a friend!
>>DCRD:I'm sure that's why you get on every day, twice a day to catch naught but a glimpse, hmm? But enough about that, I'm sure what you really want to know now is why I'm here.
>>ANON:Not in particular no.
>>DCRD:Don't lie to me, Anonymous. You want to know a whole lot more, you just don't let yourself ask! Come on now, what's the harm in asking?
>>ANON:The part where you dick me over because you are DISCORD THE SPIRIT OF CHAOS AND DISHARMONY, DUH!
>>DCRD:A minor detail, I'm sure.
 
>>ANON:Discord!
>>DCRD:Eeeeeyyyyyeeeessss?
>>ANON:I have some questions now.
>>DCRD:Oh goody! My favorite. Ask away!
>>ANON:So why is it that teleporting between dimensions is so easy, but finding the right one is hard?
>>DCRD:Simply put:if a story began with getting what you wanted, what would be the point?
>>ANON:That's a question, not an answer.
>>DCRD:Is it? Next question.
>>ANON:Why do I keep running into the Anons from the stories on 4-kun?
>>DCRD:If you did not believe in them, they wouldn't be here. Next question.
>>ANON:I thought, for some reason, you would actually answer these questions.
>>DCRD:I'm Discord, Anonymous! What exactly did you expect?
>>ANON:Twists and turns.
>>DCRD:Ah, my master plan. Yes.
>>ANON:So ...am I ever going to meet Lyra again?
>>DCRD:Heheheheh...
DCRD has logged off
 
>>ANON:So I've come to the conclusion Discord is a bastard.
>>SHRM:What, you didn't figure that out before?
>>ARTY:Dude, seriously. Get a clue, DICSORD isn't a nice guy.
>>ANON:Haha, dicksword.
>>ARTY:Unintentional spelling error for the win.
>>ANON:So aside from Lyra and Discord, who else gets on from Equestria?
>>ARTY:I don't know how to tell you this...
>>SHRM:You are the only one not from Equestria.
>>ANON:You're joking. You're joking right?
>>SHRM:Hey, nice Darkie impression!
>>ARTY:Don't let it get you down, there are plenty of worse...creatures...on the chat.
>>ANON:Like who?
MLST has logged on.
>>ARTY:Molestia! Fend for yourself, kid.
ARTY has logged off
SHRM has logged off
>>ANON:Oh, fuck me.
>>MLST:Hmmhmmhmm...trust me, I WILL!
>>ANON:Molestia, go away please.
>>MLST:No.
>>ANON:Molestia, pls go.
>>MLST:Why, I would assume you don't like me, bootsie! We may not have met before, but I'm ALWAYS eager to meet fresh meat!
>>ANON:Mooli pls
>>MLST:Well bootsie (I adore your footwear! Almost as cute as socks!) I've only just met you but I feel we could get to really know each other!
>>ANON:Nicknaming eachother, huh? (how the fuck does everyone know about the boots?) how about "the elephant in the room"? The one problem that noone wants to deal with, or acknowledge.
>>MLST:I think you might come to regret that nickname...I'll PUNISH you...sexily for that.
>>ANON:Yeah, I'm done here.
>>MLST:OH! How rude, to finish and leave the lady waiting, unsatisfied!
ANON has logged off
 
 
>>DCRD: now it begins, the great shitstorm of our time
>>ANON: ffffuck
 >>DCRD: *started a YouTube-video: The Trammps - Disco Inferno.*
>>DCRD: I am Disco(rd)
 >>ARTY: WAT
>>DCRD: ...
 >>ANON: huahahahah
>>ARTY: i didnt know Discord was a fan of Disco
 >>ANON: disco for the dicksword, right arty?
>>DCRD: being trapped in stone for over a millinea doesnt change your taste in music
>>ANON: pfffffffffffff. your taste is archaic, man. the dinosaurs didn't like this.
>>ARTY: pfffffffft
>>DCRD: that comes from the guy who hopelessly chases a pony around the multiverse
 >>ARTY: are you that desperate Discord? for LOVE?
>>ANON: haha
>>DCRD: I am not desperate...
>>ARTY: u so desperate. discord pls
>>DCRD: stop teasing me
>>ANON: y u so despreat tho. dicsord pls
>>ARTY: pls go discord.we no liek u
>>DCRD: Do you want anything Anon or are you just waiting for your beloved Lyra?
>>ANON: i want to get better. but that's why im wasting away here on a chatroom while i heal. OF COURSE IM WAITING FOR LYRA, FUCK ALL
>>DCRD: You do know she comes on at different times than you right?
>>ANON: yes, that's why i get on at all times of day
>>DCRD: man you are lost
 >>DCRD: don't you think there's a reason she haven't logged on for days?
>>ANON: maybe she's sick or on vacation
 >>DCRD: without telling her little loverboy?
>>ANON: im not her love!
>>ARTY: maybe she found another interest. maybe sherm!
>>ANON: fucking, you just crossed the line arty
>>ARTY: no, sherm has darkie. my bad my bad. let me just get on the other side of said line
>>ANON: point is, Lyra and I aren’t a couple. for fuck's sake, we only met in here a couple of times!
>>DCRD: and yet you are head over heels for her
 >>ANON: this is bullshit. you know what, dicksword? fine. i admit it. im smitten. that doesnt change a thing. im not going to let you pull this shit every time
>>DCRD: I'm gonna go tell Lyra that
>>ANON: what? NO!no dont do it, please!
DCRD has logged off
>>ARTY: hmm... the situation appears tense...
ARTY has logged off
 
 
>>ANON:Alright, I give up. I've been on the chat for 24 hours straight. What is it.
>>ARTY:Well since nobody else is on right now, I can finally tell you.
>>ANON:Tell me what?
>>ARTY:The ponies moved to another chat room.
>>ANON:What.
>>ARTY:Yup, between miro, discord and molestia, they decided to just move to another chat room [p0n335]
>>ANON:Wow. WOWWWW. Well that explains darn near everything.
 
[p0n335]
>>ANON:Hello?
>>FRGE:Ah, hello, dimensional strider. I trust you have my book?
>>ANON:Wow, even you are here. Uh, actually I just wanted to know if Lyra goes to this chat.
>>FRGE:Why yes, in fact she was in here not 2 hours ago.
>>ANON:I'm gonna be sick. I swear my timing--I'm not doing this on purpose.
>>FRGE:In any case, about my book. After talk with the others, I have found that the chat room is translating the words to our native tongue. English, your language, is not one that I can read. To get a book in Common, you will have to go to Eberron.
>>ANON:What do I get in return again? (And I would need planet coordinates and/or dimensional coordinates besides.)
>>FRGE: 12 06 53. These are the planet’s XYZ positioning in the standard form.
>>ANON:Wow.  I wasn’t expecting you to actually KNOW them.
>>FRGE:Your reward shall be information on the one known as Lyra Heartstrings.
>>ANON:That. I am also sick of everyone knowing about me and Lyra.
>>FRGE:If that is not what you desire, I find that I could give you a book for Equestrian language. Because Lyra often says that our words are translated for her as well.
>>ANON:If I wanted an EQ language book, I could go to any random dimension and pick it up.
>>FRGE:Then why haven’t you?
>>ANON:Fine. I’ll grab the book. In and out, quick and easy.
>>FRGE:Just beware those that can cast dimensional anchor. I would hate to see you dead because you attempted theft in Eberron.
>>ANON:What made you think I was going to steal a book? I don’t want wizards chasing after my ass or whatever it is you crazy dudes do to thieves with potentially valuable and oneofakind nonmagical teleport boots.
>>FRGE:Then good luck.
FRGE has logged off.
 
“Ok, so hey SpiritChild, did you know they moved to another chat room?”
>”Not really my business. I didn’t notice. Now hold still while I replace the bandage.”
>You keep yourself perfectly still. This has been going on for three days now. Soon you wouldn’t need any of this garbage.
“Well I’m one step, hop and a jump from Lyra closer.”
>”Good for you. Now get some sleep.”
“Aye aye, oh leader.”
>He finishes wrapping you up and hits the lights.
>You lie there in your makeshift hospital bed with your computer close by.
>The boots are fully charged and ready.
>Maybe tomorrow, you should go snag that book.
>And see what forge has to say about Lyra.
 
>Sleep came easily enough, but it was anything but peaceful.
>Your usual nightmares were gone, replaced by visions of you fucking everything up.
>Making it to Lyra's world and not understanding a word.
>Through a game called Nightmare's return to Dreamland, Luna played you off into pits, causing you to die on multiple occaison.
>You slapped the cartridge and it was gone.
>Thank someone for small favors in a dream, eh?
>You awake to find discord, constantly laughing over you, Lyra at his side.
>"Eww, a stalker? I hardly know you, freak."
>You try to respond, and use your boots to teleport.
>YOU ARE THE BOOTS.
>Discord puts you on and teleports superfast now because he can already teleport.
>He takes you off and Lyra wears you, when she activates it, only her lower half teleports and she is dead.
>Dead inside you.
>You try to vomit, anything, but you are just boots.
>Now you wake up.
>Your heart pounding.
>Your arms feel backwards, your legs like they've been crushed.
"Well this isn't a good night's rest."
>You scratch your muzzle with your hoof and go to the mirror, brushing your pink and blue mane back into place.
>Discord is at the table, eating some cereal or another with gorillas on them.
>"Morning, Bon Bon."
"Yeah, morning."
>"So I says to the guy, I'm gonna tell Lyra!"
"Oh nooo! Hahaha, what a creep."
>"The best part is, he doesn't even know what time any of this is! HA! He's dreaming RIGHT NOW!"
"That's nutty, Lyra."
>Then Discord was gone, Lyra in his place.
>"All you ever wanted, in front of you, all you could never find."
"What?"
>"You're the death of your own plans, Anonymous."
>You feel a twist in your gut, you lie down to get rid of the pain, and feel the floor's cold surface alleviate it against your stomach.
>"How is the child coming along?"
>The dream began to become more lucid, and you realized what was happening.
"Lyra...wh-what's going on?"
>Discord stands in front of you again, Lyra disappearing.
>"Those who don't play by the rules suffer horrible fates, my dear Anonymous."
>He draws a talon across your chest, cereal spilling out among the blood.
>You scream.
 
>You are screaming, accidentally kicking a bowl of cereal out of SpiritChild's hands and onto your stomach.
"GAAAAAHHHH!"
>"Fuck, man, calm down! Wake the hell up!"
>You are awake.
>The fuck kind of dream was that?
>"You had a nightmare, alright? Calm the hell down. Other than lack of sleep, I was going to surprise you with good news: you can go Jumping again. You want to go now or later?"
"Frickin get me out of here."
>Minutes later you have your gear on once more.
>Inputting the code for Eberron, you prepare to jump.
>"You gonna be alright?"
"Should be, I plan to stop by back here again. I think I have something in the lab I can use later."
>"Well good luck."
>You Jump.
 
 
>In your house, SpiritChild casts his gaze over the chat sites.
>"I told you that those who don't obey the rules suffer horrible fates, didn't I? Chat room p0n335 isn't going to work. Only lf159. Being chaotic, I can decide to follow some rules every once in a while..."
>He snaps his fingers, returning them to talons.
>Discord stretches, popping more than a few joints in his elongated spine.
>He snaps his talons again, enveloping the computer in a bright light that dissolves after a few seconds.
>"Now that that's handled, I've got some chaos to wreak."
>And with another snap, he's gone.
 
>You land at home no worse for the wear.
>You "Borrowed" a book from the library. Easy peasy.
>Eberron ain't got shit on you. or at least for a week.
>You don't want to wait to get on the chat and hope FRGE is there, you pop in the dim coords he was at and Jump again.
 
>You land, book in hand.
>Forge, ever the patient...thing, has a book in his own hands.
>"I thank you for the trade, Anonymous."
"Yeah yeah, thanks later, Lyra info now."
>If he could portray emotion, you could see him grin slyly.
>"Lyra is a fun-loving energetic p0ny who makes friends almost as fast as Pinkie Pie. Just, she has a difficult time making friends with the other ponies due to her eccentricities."
>He passes you the book, and you pass him "yours".
>Trade complete, you Jump back home for the last time, hopefully.
>Not to sound dramatic or anything.