Twilight, Top hat, waratah
 
>It was bound to happen.
>Every year after Trixie makes her rounds through Ponyville.
>Even though Twilight out does her in the form of unicorn magic, here you were in her treehouse watching her magic show.
>"Ladies and Gentlecolts. Thank you for coming to the Terrific Twilights Tantalizing Talent Show!"
>"Woo! You go Twilight!"
>At least Spike is putting some effort into this.
"Yay."
>You look down at your watch.
>4:00
>Ugh.
>Twilight enters the room from a cloud of purple mist wearing a black cape and top hat.
>The machine creating the purple mist doesn't seem to want to turn off, and begins to clog the air.
>Spike tries to turn off the machine, but it's all in vain.
>The room steadily becomes more and more purple as everyone coughs.
>Army crawl to the machine like a boss!
>Grab the machine and line up the pass.
>Looks like it's going to have to be a hail mary.
>You throw the machine with all of your might.
>In slow motion you watch the machine head towards one of the library's windows.
>It shatters through the glass!
"IT'S GOOD!"
"THE PATRIOTS WIN THE SUPER BOWL!"
"JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN JOHN MADDEN!"
>Twilight and Spike stare at you as the purple smoke slowly exits the room.
"You know it was awesome."
>Retaking your seat, you look back down at your watch.
>4:01.
>Great.
>"For my first trick, I will need help from the audience."
>"OOH! OOH PICK ME! PICK ME!" screams the baby dragon.
>Spike is jumping up and down on his seat with both arms extended in the air.
>You continue to stare blank-eyed, anywhere but to where Twilight is standing, staring at you.
>Oh man, you are tired.
>You shouldn't have stayed up so late last night.
>Then again, you had a great reason.
>It's not every night that you get to eat 50 cakes.
>Injustice would ravage the land if you didn't.
>Plus the Cakes would never find out.
>Maybe.
>Feeling an itch in the middle of your back, you reach to scratch the itch.
>"Anon!"
"What?"
>"You raised your hand!"
>You look up at your raised hand.
"Fuck."
>Walk up to her makeshift stage made out of books, and stand next to her.
>Spike is visibly jealous that you were picked instead of him.
>"Alright Anon!"
>She takes off her top hat and places it on a table in front of you.
>"Clearly an ordinary top hat? Correct?"
"Uh. Yeah."
>You look inside.
>Looks empty enough.
>"Reach in and pull out your heart's desire." says Twilight with a smile.
>"This is my favorite part!" says Spike angrily.
>You reach into the hat and begin to feel around.
>Well, one thing for sure, it doesn't feel like a hat.
>In fact, it's warm, and slimey.
>You move to reach deeper.
>"NO NO NO NO! I HAVENT RESET IT YET." screams Twilight.
>Her face is visibly red, as she casts a spell on the hat.
>You look to her, then to Spike, then to her.
>"150 bits."
"Sold."
>You reach back into the hat, and slowly pull out a glowing flower.
>It's the weirdest flower that you have ever seen.
>"Oh Anon! You found a Magical Waratah!"
"Uh. This is a flower. Not Rarity."
>"RARITY! WHERE?" Exclaims the tiny dragon.
>You ignore Spike for the moment to refocus on Twilight.
"So what does it do?"
>"Well... I don't know. Maybe if we took careful time to research it, we might be able to figure out how it works."
"Hmmm. Learning it's supernatural properties seems like quite the intelligent decision."
>Twilight's eyes light up, forgetting the magic show.
>"Then let's go down to the lab and-"
>Eat that shit!
>Awww yiss.
>"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
"Eating. I'm starving."
>Suddenly a massive table of food appears in front of you.
"Damn, I'm gunna need so much chocolate milk to eat dis shit."
>Three gallons of chocolate milk appear on the table.
>...
>Aww yiss.
>"Anon, I dunno if you should-"
"Twilight shut up."
>Twilight's mouth jumps off her face and rolls out the door.
>The purple unicorn looks like she is about to cry.
"Uhh... Why the long face?"
>She stares bullets at you.
"If I give you your mouth back, will you lecture me?"
>Twilight shakes her head.
"Speak."
>The mouth reappears on her face.
>"Anon! How can you be so careless!"
"Nope."
>The mouth vanishes once again as you skip out of the library.
>Time to head back home.
>Strutting past Carousel Boutique, you see Rarity sweeping the front of her store.
>Your epic swagger kicks up more dust and infuriates the marshmallow pone.
>"Anonymous! Would you please stop being such a hooligan for 10 minutes?"
"Why don't you stop being such a bitch?"
>Oh yeah.
>Burn.
>You feel a tug on the back of your pants.
>Turning around, you see Rarity with a wide smile.
>"Hug?"
>You stare at her.
"Go back the old way. I liked that better."
>Returning to your home, you point at the table.
"PIZZA!"
>The table turns into a pizza.
>Fuck.
>You hear a knock from your door.
>Spinning in place, you point at the door.
"Who is it?"
>The door explodes.
>"EEEEP!"
>Fluttershy stands, shocked at the door dematerializing in front of her.
"Whassup Flutterbutter?"
>"O-oh. Uhm... Well."
>She pulls out a chocolate cake and places it on the ground.
>Not this fucking shit.
"Fluttershy. Stop doing whatever you doing. Stop the fetish guessing and just ask me out for a date."
>She stares at you.
>Her pupils become the size of needles.
>Awww shet.
>HIT THE DECK!
>You dive behind the couch just before the yellow pegasus explodes into a countless number of yellow mini-marshmallows.
>Well. Looks like life is going to be a lot more interesting. All thanks to that awesome, magical,
>Fucking Waratah.