>Day crystal apple in Equestria.
>Wake up with rock-hard morning wood.
>Jesus, it almost hurts to move.
>Head to the bathroom to solve the problem.
>Blast it with piss.
>Your erection isn't subsiding.
>In fact, upon closer inspection, you notice that there's a thin, hard, transparent material coating it.
>What the fuck?
>You tap at it a few times with your finger and the material responds with a dull 'plunk.'
>Seriously, what the fuck?
>Your mind attempts to ponder the possibilities of what's happening when your cock begins to tremble ever so slightly.
>The material begins to encase the tip of your member and grows a few more inches towards your pelvis.
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?
>Your hyperventilating is interrupted by a knocking at your door.
>Of course. Fluttershy...
>You race to the door and open it, not even bothering with your boxers or pants.
>Sure enough, it's Flutters. But she looks different.
>She's shiny, almost crystalline. And she's wearing some jewel apple pendant around her neck.
>But her fashion statement isn't important right now.
Fluttershy, what the FUCK is this about?
>You gesture to your glass dick.
>"Oh, well... It's because I love you, Anon."
That doesn't even make sense! Why can't you find a nice stallion to bother?
>"Their love isn't enough. I want you, Anon. I want you to become my sexy crystal king."
>You glance back down at your family jewels display case.
That'll never happen, Shy.
>"Marry me, Anon! And we can snuggle through time and space. And kiss each other in the Crystal Kingdom."
No! You've become too sassy and drunk on crystal power!
>You sock her in her chest, shattering her pendant.
>Her body reverts to its normal form, along with Anon Jr.
>"S-So... Tree Trunks isn't your fetish?"
>Fucking Adventure Time...