>"I sent Derpy here to tell you about a new event that YOU would be participating in."
>A crowd had gathered around your door, wondering what was going on.
>Apparently, Twilight hadn't remembered to get rid of the book, because she ended up dropping it on some poor filly's head.
>That whole situation took about two hours to clear up, so you went back inside to play some more vidya gaemz. You tried and failed millions of times to get to that one spot on the map in Fallout Equestria 4 that so many had told you contained an Easter Egg which would break the game. You were about to stage a ragequit of epic proportions before Twilight interrupted you.
>"As I was saying, There is a new event that I have organized where you would be involved."
"What the hell do you want, Twiggles?"
>"I will be hosting a Q&A in the town square for the ponies here in Ponyville so we all can get to know you better."
>Goddamnit.
>"I have heard that ponies around here are a bit skittish about your presence here, and some have even called for your... removal. I have organized this weekly interview so that ponies can find out more about you, and hopefully be more comfortable around you."
>You didn't care.
>"And this Q&A is mandatory, so you can't decide to back out of it. Unless you have a deadly, infectious disease, of course."
"Fine."
>You don't really have much of a choice, since a goddess in small horse form is enforcing your mandatory attendance.
"Don't think I won't go kicking and screaming, though."
>"Great! The first interview is tomorrow at High Noon!"
>You sigh, and go back inside to try and get pissed off enough to ragequit again.
 
>You're just waking up the next morning, and you hear a crash as three small horses invade your bedroom.
>"Hi, Anon! You up yet?"
"Yes, I'm awake. Will you three just leave now?"
>"Uhh, no. We can't leave just yet." Applebloom looked up at you with those fucking adorable gold eyes that just made you want to gag.
"Why the hell can't you shitstains leave?"
>"Princess Twilight told us to make sure that you remembered what was happening today," answered Sweetie Belle.
"That I'm being interrogated against my will today? Yes, I'm pretty sure I remember that," You answer with a snort.
>Orange Chicken looks at you with an annoyed face.
>"Hey, no need to be so rude about it."
"You're the ones in MY FUCKING HOUSE! And if you haven't noticed already, you've overstayed your welcome," you say as you slowly draw a machete out from under your bed.
>The fillies, seeing this, begin to back towards the window.
>The stool that you haphazardly left under the window pane last night turns out really useful, as they jump up onto that so that they can escape the now scary confines of your room.
>You sigh in relief as you watch them scurry across the road on their way back to... wherever the hell it is that they come from.
 
>It's 11 am.
>Watching shitty pone tv.
>Some propaganda or something about how friendship holds their society together.
>Get bored, start channel surfing.
>Also, you're eating breakfast.
>A nice, big, hearty plate of Eggs, Toast, and
>BOMB ASS BACON.       
>Oh, and you've also got a bowl of Alpha Bits.
>Don't know how those got into your groceries, but you don't care.
"This shit isn't half bad."
>You flip through the multitude of *awful* TV channels that these ponies have created, and try to find one that suits your needs of entertainment.
>You find a thing called "The Story of the Elements of Harmony"
"Interesting..."
>They're in the middle of a thing about how Twiggles was a huge nerd growing up
>Oh
>You thought it was about the strange and mysterious stones that you only knew about through vague tales of the past from Twilight.
>It's 11:30.
>A knock at your door.
>You creep to the window, and see The One And Only outside.
>You rush back to the couch and yell
"I'M NOT DONE WITH BREAKFAST YET!"
>You hear the door unlock.
>Apparently, she doesn't care.
>All at once, the door flies open, she drags you outside using her telekinesis, and you scream with a mouth full of BOMB ASS BACON.
>She's quite cheery, asking you with a singsong voice, "Are you ready for the Q&A?"
"I'm still in my pajamas," you groan.
>"Do you think anypony will care?"
>Probably not.
>Your silence is enough of an answer for her, as she replies, "I thought so."
>As you near the town square, you see that a stage has been set up in the middle (as close to the middle as it can be, what with the fountain in the center), and that there is already an audience of about 10 ponies.
>The only things missing are You and Twiggles.
>She goes up on stage and sits you down.
>"Hello, everypony! Welcome to the first 'Ask Anon' Q&A, hosted by Me!"
>The ponies applaud, and more arrive to sit and watch.
>"Since we're starting a bit early, I figured that it would be appropriate to ask our friend Anonymous here if he would like to say anything..."
>"So Anon, what would you like to tell the audience?"