>You've been in the candy horse lands for two months now, every moment has been a walking nightmare.
>These small horses demand constant attention, the purple freak of nature interrogates you, the blue one won't stop touching you.
>Worst of all, the pink one pops out of nowhere and forces you to scratch behind her ears.
>If you were a religious man you'd say this was hell.
>Actually it's not that bad, but wasn't that description fucking radical?
>Today was shaping up to be a good day actually.
>The one true lord and savior Princess Celestia has invited you into the castle.
>You two had things in common.
>You loved complaining about life on Earth, and she loved hearing about Earth.
>Why, Twilight was probably writing some fanfiction right now.
>Now back to the matter at hand, remember when I said today WAS shaping up to be a good day?
>Here's is where that stopped
>The Princess wanted to show you her diagram of the solar system, apparently she made it when she was just a little babby.
>The problem was that every time she would pick up a planet, she would drop it.
>And it would roll under something
>Then she would spend some time searching for it underneath whatever it fell over.
>Causing her horse butt to wiggle around near your face.
>Apparently the planets were 2delicate5magic.
>It just keeps happening, it wouldn't be a problem if you didn't have a serious condition.
>You are a serial ass slapper
 
 
 
>Back on Earth, you were slapped more than a few times for your condition.
>It also wasn't a condition, just something it was hard not to do, like stopping yourself right before you ejaculate.
>Of course some females didn't mind.
>Mostly friends, freaks, and desperate women.
>Is Celestia one of those?
>She's certainly not desperate or a freak.
>You and her get along, you're friends right?
>Maybe you shouldn't do-
*WHAP*
>Too late habbening, abandon ship.
>The Princess turns around as quick as a sloth on opposite day.
>"Oh!"
>"A-anon! Di-...did you just slap my b-butt?"
>She doesn't seem mad, but confused.
>Maybe you can lie.
"Uh, the ceiling did it?"
>Celestia's face right there reminds you of your grandmama.
>"Nuh-uh honey child, you gonna take this whoopin" Damn you miss Grandma
"Okay, yes I did, sorry."
>Never Back Down 2: The Backdown
>"Well... why?!"
>That is the face of someone who is hurt emotionally.
 
 
 
>Best tell her the truth, bitches love the truth.
"Well Princess, I just couldn't resist doing it."
>She doesn't say anything, you try not to look at her.
>Well goodbye world, looks like the author gave up.
>"Tell me Anonymous, if I were another pony, could you've stopped yourself?"
>Considering circumstances probably not.
"I could've, but not with you princess."
>Liar
>Celestia turns to the side, contemplating moidah possibly.
>"Pfft.."
>What was that noise?
>"Pff-Hahahahahha!"
>The princess breaks into an all out giggle fit, like a mad horse.
"Uh, Princess, what's so funny?"
>"Haheheh, looks like this princess has still got it, come here and give me a hug."
>You stand up and walk over to horse.
>Apparently to slowly because she pulls you close with her magic.
>During the hug, you see her horn light up in the corner of your eye.
>If ever you felt guilty for slapping butts, it was when a magically created hand met contact with your tushy.
>"Gotcha"
>Oh hell nah, this is war now, play dead from the slap.
>You fall to the ground and play possum, biding your time.
>"Playing dead won't work Anonymous, but nice try."
>Damn, she's good
>Plan B, bullrush her and swing for the booty.
>Literally two seconds later, you're upside down in mid-air
>"You may have caught me by surprise but if you wanna touch this again you'll have to put in work."
>She turns around to taunt you with her butt.
>The sight of those big jigglies shaking back and forth would make a man cry.
"Please Princess can't I touch them."
>"No"
>Well bargaining didn't work, time to be a sick badass.
"HEYCELLYWHEREDAVIDEOGAMES?!"
>"What?!"
>"A unicorn needs concentration to cast spells." Turns out Twilight's lectures were actually helpful
>Her magic grip falls and you land on her back.
>Well, most of you. Your head swung downwards due to your body being stopped.
 
 
>Anonymous was never a smart man.
>So when he found his face trapped in a dark mysterious place he used his tongue to explore. This is the story of Anon's Tongue.
"Hmm, this place is pretty warm, better stay close to the walls."
>The walls were made of some soft material, silk, maybe.
>But the farther the little tongue went, the closer the other wall got.
"Hmm, they seem to meet at this cave."
>It would be a tight fit to get into the cave, not to mention the walls were somewhat damp and smelled foul
>"W-what did you say?"
>It would appear we have to save this adventure for another time.
>Celestia has pulled you out of the cavern and up to face her.
>Oh shit angry woman, kill your children before they suffer
>The princess composes herself before speaking.
>"You were doing very well until you insulted me, and could you please not talk while you're doing it?"
"Well, eexcuuse me Princess for trying to make it a little more ebin."
>"You are not excused!"
>Celestia turns around and you're face to face with her horse pussy again.
>"Say you're sorry"
>Fo' rizzle?
>"Do it before I throw you out!"
"I'm sorry I said it smelled bad"
>"Good."
>You're pulled right into the cavern this time.
>Make an examination and determine the best strat.
>Since she's a horse, her clit pops out when she winks her pussy. Looks like it's time for the boxer shrimp style.
>That's when you repeatedly bullet punch a female's clitoris, named after that shrimp who throws death punches.
>Just like a boxer throwing a jab, you lick up and down her slit to set up for the bullet punch, occasionally prodding her insides to soften her up more.
>The clit appears and your tongue shoots out like a rocket. A perfect shot.
>"MMFFMMFNFMHGMHNF!"
>If her weird sounds didn't confirm orgasm, the gallons of juices coming out her did.
>You drink from the spout of the heavens, a warrior tasting victory.
>Victory tastes like Sunny D, huh
 
 
>The princess has fallen, her face on the ground, a pillow in her teeth, and her booty in the air.
>You begin to unbuckle your pants
"Y'know, in high school, some dumbass spread a rumor that he saw me fucking a horse, nobody talked to me after that. Life sure is funny huh?"
>"Hmmm.."
*UNZIPPING SOUND*
>Your pants fall to the ground and you shuffle over behind her.
>Grabbing hold of her flanks, you push her massive gluteus globes together.
"Your ass looks like a heart Celly, you must really love me."
>"Just shut up and rut me."
>Now who could turn down such a polite request?
>You don't ease it in, you jam that fucker in, hitting the walls as much as you can.
>The walls soon close in on Detective Dick Tracy.
>Slowly, you pull him back out.
>Then when it's just the tip, you jam it back in!
>"Gahhhhh!"
>Not even biting the pillow could stop that one.
>You keep up a steadily increasing pace of slow out fast in.
>Then the best idea you've ever had breaks into your mind, you look down.
>Right at that pony butthole.
>You slow down your pace and stick your index finger in your mouth, getting it nice and lubed.
>Celestia turns her head just in time to see your finger plunged deep with in her asshole.
>"AAAAAAHHHHH!"
>Sunny D pools around your feet as you continue to fuck the royalty out of the princess.
>Soon though, you feel your own release coming soon, and you get the absolute best idea you've ever had.
>You keep thrusting until you're right on the edge.
>"Cum inside!"
>Heheheh
>You pull out of her vagina...
>AND THRUST BALLS DEEP INTO HER ASSHOLE!
>"OH MY FUUUUUCK!!"
"YOU SAID A SWEAR!"
>With those final words, you blast goo deep inside Celestia's behind.
>Still, you leave it in afterwards.
>Well, not like you have much choice, Princess Celestia, won't let you out.
>You both fall on your sides, exhausted.
>Once again you try and pull out.
>"No, leave it in, it'll be a pleasant surprise when Luna comes to wake me up."
>Kek
 
The End