>Up bright and early the next day
>You can hear AppleJack banging around in the kitchen
>You sit up and rub your eyes
>What were you going to do today?
>Oh yeah
>You need a job
>You run your hand over your face
>oof
>If you're gonna get a job, you need to be presentable
>You grab your glasses
>then don your clothing
>you put on your holster and knife
>Thus fortified, you press onwards into the kitchen
>AppleJack is cooking
Hey AppleJack...
>"Yeah?"
Do you have a razor?
>She frowns
>"Can't say that ah do.  Whut do ya need one for?"
Shaving.  I'm going to take a shower, if that's alright
>"Sure"
>And so you walk down the hall and into the bathroom
>You have to kneel to get under the shower head
>but you persevere
>The hot water feels wonderful running down your less than immaculate frame
>After the shower, you towel off
>The towels are surprisingly large, for ponies
>Guess it must have something to do with being covered in fur
>With no razor, you're forced to take drastic measures
>You kneel down in front of the sink, and pull out your knife
>You saw this in a movie once...
 
 
>Well, that had mixed success
>Your face is more or less shaved, at the cost of a few nicks
>This will have to do until you can find a razor in town somewhere
>And to do that, you need bits
>Which brings you full circle to the issue at hand
>You don your clothing and head into the kitchen
>By now, AppleJack has breakfast cooked
>It's hashbrowns and toast
>And some fruit, like oranges, bananas...
>And apples
>You're gonna need to find some protein soon
>For now though, you're alright
>Neither of you talk much
>She seems to be about as good with mornings as you are
Care for a ride to town again?
>"Ah'd love one"
>She pauses and waits for you to don your gear
>As you both walk out to your truck, you spy a yellow speck approaching from the woods
>Well shit
>For all you know, it's another homicidal pegasus
>You lower yourself into a crouch and prepare for the worst
>AppleJack notices your change in posture and turns to look
>"That's just Fluttershy.  Nothing to be scared of"
>AppleJack hasn't lied to you before
>So you trust her and resume your standing position
>The approaching speck resolves itself into a yellow pegasus with a pink mane
 
 
>As it closes, it quails a bit at the sight of you
>It looks ready to fly off at any moment
>"Um, you're... you're Anonymous... Right?"
>Oh man
>This has got to be the most timid person-pony-anything you've ever met
>Such a quiet voice
>As you scrutinize her, she tries to hide behind her mane
>The sight impacts dangerously close to your heart
Yeah?
>She gives a small "eep!" at the sound of your voice
>But manages to continue
>"I really, really need your help!"
>She seems determined
>This must be important
>You instantly forget your plans for the day
Well let's go then!  Lead the way!
>You open the passenger door of your truck
Care to join us, AppleJack?
>"Sure!"
>She hops inside the truck
>You jump in yourself and jam the key in the ignition
>The rumble of the engine catches Fluttershy off her guard and she runs off in fear
>Well, this isn't going to be easy
>You shut the truck off, hop out and approach her
Fluttershy, it's alright.  It's just my truck.  Here, hop in
>You say in a softer voice
>You open the door and beckon her inside
>She hops in and settles herself next to AppleJack
>Still looks a little apprehensive though
>You jump in and close the door once more
Now, can you point where we need to go?
>She nods and points off into the distance
>You start the truck and rumble off
 
 
>After a few minutes, you find yourself on the edge of the forest
>In front of a small cottage
>The thing was surrounded by wildlife
>Even moreso than usual for a forest
>That is, until you drove up in your truck
>They all scattered pretty fast after that
Is this it?
>She nods in the affirmative
>You shut the truck off and open the driver side door
>Exiting, you hold the door open while the two p0nies jump down
>"Um, if you would follow me..."
Sure
>Fluttershy leads the two of you around the side of the cottage at a rapid pace
>Behind it a plethora of bird feeders and houses sprout from the ground like a bizarre plant
>This isn't what catches your attention though
>Across the yard lays a moose
>It's smaller than any moose you've ever seen
>Standing, it might be as tall as your belly button
>But it's not standing now
>Its front leg is laying at an unnatural angle
>Across the clearing you go, following the anxious Fluttershy
>The moose bellows when you come into sight and makes as if to get up
>But Fluttershy coos to it, and it soon settles back onto the ground
 
 
>"He... He dislocated his shoulder"
>"I um... I don't have the strength..."
>Right
>So she wants you to pop its shoulder back in place
>You pick up a fairly thick stick on your way over
He can understand you, right?
>She nods
Tell him to bite down on this
>You hand her the stick
>She takes it in her mouth, then gives it to the moose
>You kneel next to the moose and consider your situation
>You know how to do this
>Theoretically
>For a human
>AppleJack stands next to you
I'm going to need your help
>"Ahl right, show me"
>You make a motion, and look over at Fluttershy
Like this?
>"Yes... yes, that will work..."
>You grit your teeth
This is gonna hurt for just a second
>The moose's eyes widen
>He knows what's coming
>You carefully take hold of his leg
>And wait for AppleJack to get into position
On 3
1
2
3
>You both yank upward on the leg
>The joint relocates with an audible POP
>The moose emits a muffled bellow
Is there anything else?
>"He um, he needs to go in the stable, y'know.  If that's okay"
>She indicates a small building next to the house
 
 
>Well, onwards to glory
>You hop over to the other side of the moose
>He's a hell of a lot heavier than Applebloom
>But with your help, he's able to stand
>You support him as he limps into the stable and settles into a hay pile
>That accomplished, you step back and dust yourself off
>"Thank you"
>You turn around to Fluttershy
>She is once again hiding behind her mane
>Must be a common thing for her
You must be Fluttershy
>She nods
It's a pleasure to meet you.
How did you know about me?
>"Rainbow Dash mentioned you... when she um, she was visiting yesterday"
Why didn't you get one of the unicorns instead?
>She shrugs a bit
>"You were closer"
Well Fluttershy, unless there's anything else
>She shakes her head
Then I'll get out of your... mane
>And with that, you turn around and head back to your truck
>AppleJack joins you, and soon enough you're rumbling towards town
 
 
>As you drive towards town, it resumes snowing
>AppleJack pipes up
>"Fluttershy's a good pony, she's just a mite shy"
>That's one way of putting it
>You nod
>A few minutes pass
>Then, a thought strikes you
>Applejack has to have some sort of job, right?
>It's a long shot, but you think you'll get further with her than you will asking random ponies on the street if they need work done
Hey AppleJack
>"Yeah?"
Do you have a winter job?
>"Ah sure do!  Me and mah brother, Big Macintosh, keep the streets clear of snow"
>"Along with several other ponies o'course"
Do you think I could help out?  If I'm going to live in your house, I need to contribute
>Applejack nods in approval
>"Well ah don't rightly know.  Yall would have to talk to the mayor"
How do you clear snow here, anyway?
>"Ah can show ya when we get to town"
 
 
>The rest of the ride into town passes in silence
>Applejack directs you to a rather large building near the center of town
>You park in front
>This must be the town hall
>She leads you to a smaller extension and opens the sliding door
>Inside are several pony sized plows
>Two wheels in the back link to a broad, flat blade in the front
>The entire affair is covered by an awning that rises from the rear wheels
>AppleJack enters the shed ahead of you and approaches one of them
>As you watch, she hops inside and begins pushing
>She exits the shed and clears a path
>Not the most efficient design
>But it looks like it fills the needs of these ponies
>She makes a circle around your truck and comes back
>"So how do ya'll clear snow where ya come from?"
>In response, you open the tailgate of your truck and remove your shovel
>The blade is as large as the blade on her plow
>You quickly make a path from the storage area to the front door of the town hall
>Well, this looks good
>You go quite a bit faster than the pony plow does
>"Ah think ya could get the job; 'specially after ol' One Eye retired"
>"Let's go ask the mayor"
 
 
>So saying, she leads you inside the town hall proper
>There are a few chairs
>two doors set into the far wall
>And end tables with what look like magazines on them
>In front of the doors a pony in horn rimmed glasses sits at a desk
>She looks bored out of her skull
>She glances up at the sound of the door opening
>Her look quickly changes to one of surprise and terror
>"We'd like to see the mayor, if that's alright"
>"da-daa-da-da-daaaaaaaaaa"
I'll take that as a yes
>You walk down the hall and past the stuttering secretary
>And knock swiftly on the door with the "Mayor's office" Plaque above it
>"Come in!" You hear from behind the door
>You push the door open from the side
Ladies first
>AppleJack trots through the door
>"Miss Mayor, ah have a friend who would like to work for the town"
>A faintly bored sounding voice responds
>"Well, I'll have to meet them first"
>You decide this is your time
>And crouch through the door
>The mayor is a light brown pony with a grayish mane and tail
>She wears a dress collar with green ruff, and a pair of rimless glasses
>She has a scroll on her flank
>Her jaw drops as you stand to your full height
>"Miss Mayor, this is Anonymous.  He would like to fill in for ol' One Eye"
Indeed.  Pleased to meet you, Miss Mayor
>The mayor goggles at you
>"Well, uhhhhh"
>She shakes her head and composes herself
>"You certainly look sturdy enough..."
>"But I'll have to see you in action before I can hire you"
Sure
>You turn around and step back through the door
 
 
>The secretary has stopped making noise now
>She just sort of... sits there
>You wave your hand in front of her eyes
>No response
Does this happen often?
>"No, but then we don't often get ponies of your stature.  I'm sure she'll snap out of it in a bit"
>Leaving the staring secretary, you exit the building with AppleJack and Mayor in tow
>You pick up your shovel and resume snow clearing
>This time you clear the base of the steps, and start a path off towards an adjacent building
>When you get about 20 feet from the building, the Mayor pipes up
>"That's quite enough.  You're hired!"
>That's it?
>That's all you have to do?
>Well shit
>That was easier than you expected
>"AppleJack will show you the ropes"
Thanks, miss Mayor
>"You can start tomorrow.  Have a nice day now!"
>She turns around and re enters the town hall
>You look at AppleJack
Well, that was easy
>"She was mighty quick to hire ya..."
>"But ah'm not complainin'.  It'll be nice to have another hard worker on the team"
>Well, now you're stuck
>You've accomplished your objective for today
>And you've still got half of it to go
>You could go back to the farm
>Or go say hello to Applebloom, wherever she is
>Maybe you could answer more of Twilight's questions...
>Your rumbling stomach interrupts your thoughts
>Guess that settles that
Know anywhere good to eat?
>"Sure.  Ah know just the place"
 
 
>AppleJack lead you to a small restaurant
>The food was filling, and you even got some beans
>Gotta get protein wherever you can
>After you finish lunch, AppleJack leaves
>She has some shopping to do
>The rest of the day stretches before you
>Filled with endless possibilities
>You jingle your keys in thought
>Oh, right
>Something else you meant to address today
>If Twilight could replicate bullets
>Could she replicate gas, or oil?
>You had filled the tanks in your truck before you came here
>So it could do another few hundred miles
>But you really would rather have it functional
>Never know when a good truck can come in handy
>Your course of action settled, you head back to the truck
>And drive it over to Twilight's
 
 
>You knock once more on the door to the housebrary
>Spike opens it this time
>And he doesn't even flinch
>Good
>You aren't sure you can live here if everyone is scared of you
Is Twilight available?
>"She's working in her lab, but I'm sure she won't mind a visit from you"
>So saying, he steps aside and allows you to enter
>You don't expect to be here long, so you just stomp the snow out of your boots
>Spike motions for you to follow him
>He leads you through another door, and down a flight of stairs
>Through the archway, you see a proper scientific abode
>Beakers and tubes everywhere
>Along with vials and jars of mysterious substances
>Twilight stands in front of a large table covered in bunsen burners and a jumbled array of tubing and beakers
>She's wearing what appears to be a lab coat
>"Twilight, you've got a visitor"
>She looks up, irritated
>"Spike, can't you see I'm in the m-"
>Her expression quickly changes at the sight of you
>"Anonymous, good to see you!  I had a few more questions, if you don't mind..."
>She says as she shuts off various burners, stoppers bottles and removes the lab coat
I'd love to answer your questions, but first I have something I was hoping you could help me with...
>Her curiosity is piqued
>"Of course"
>You glance around
>Then you grab a length of tubing and two bottles
Mind if I borrow these?
>"Go ahead"
>You turn around and head back up the stairs
>Both Twilight and Spike follow you up, then out of the house
 
 
You've seen my truck run, and I have no doubt you're bursting with questions
>She nods
I will answer them to the best of my ability, but first I must show you something
>You remove your gloves and open the fuel cap cover on the left tank
>Then you unscrew the fuel cap and feed the tubing down the fueling pipe
>Using your mouth, you start a siphon
>You put a little gas in one bottle, and fill the other completely
>That accomplished, you stopper the bottles and drain the remaining gas in the tube back into the tank
All of the noise, all of the power and speed...
>You hold the full bottle up to the sun for them to see
All thanks to this
>As you set the nearly empty bottle on the ground and open it, you narrate
This is gasoline
>You remove a rod from the truck bed and attach a rag to the end
It is extremely flammable
>You draw your lighter and light the rag
And without it
>You reach out and touch the flames to the top of the bottle
My truck cannot function
>The fumes in the bottle ignite and produce a large jet of flame
>"Woooooaaaahhh"
>This from Spike
>You guess dragons would have an appreciation for fire
>It lasts for around 30 seconds before petering out
>You stick the rod into a nearby snowbank, extinguishing it
Do you think you could replicate it?
>"Hmmmmm"
>Twilight sits down in concentration
>"I might be able to modify a transmutation spell"
>"Could I see that?"
Certainly.  I only request you take care not to drop it
>"You hold out the full bottle and she takes it with her magic
>The front door to the housbrary opens, and a similar bottle floats through
>Holding the two in front of her, her horn once again begins to glow
>The aura around the two bottles intensifies
>As quickly as it came, the glow recedes
>The bottle from the house floats over to you
>You take it from her magical grasp
>It's warm to the touch
>You remove the stopper and take a whiff
>..Yep, definitely gasoline
>That solves a major worry that's been eating at you
>You turn to Twilight
You might want to put something on.  This could take a while
>Twilight's eyes bulge out of her head a bit
>"Spike, could you go get me a notebook please?"
 
 
>You're on your back under the front of the truck
>Pointing to various parts of the engine from the bottom
>Twilight is looking from the top though the open hood
>And writing up a storm
>You can hear the pencil scratching from here
This is the exhaust manifold, it removes the smoke from the cylinders...
>You roll a bit to point to a different part
And thi-
>You turn your head to see a pair of blue eyes staring in to your own
AAAAAAAAAH!
>You nearly slam your forehead into the bottom of the engine block
>"HI ANONYMOUS!"
JESUS FUCK
>"Who's that?"
>NOPE
>NOPE
>NOPENOPENOPE
>You push yourself out from under the truck and leap to your feet
>From under your truck emerges...
>Pinkie Pie
>You're panting hard
>Your heart rate would put some speedcore to shame
Goddamnit Pinkie...
Don't DO that
>"Do what?  I just said hi!"
>You look at Twilight with exasperation in your eyes
>"I think he means don't surprise him like that again, Pinkie"
>"But that's not as fun..."
>"Anyway, I came to tell you that your welcome  party is at Sugarcube corner tonight.  You gotta come!"
Yeah, sure, I promise
>She dons a look of utter seriousness
>"Do you PINKIE PROMISE?"
What
>"Cross your heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in your eye?"
>Sure, why not
>You're going to go anyway
Cross my heart
>You make the motion
Hope to fly
>You flap your arms and jump a bit
Stick a cupcake in my eye
>You slap your hand onto your face, over your eye
>You finish your little act and look down at the p0nies
>They're both rolling on the ground laughing
Oh come on
>They show no signs of stopping
I wasn't that funny, was I?
>"y-you were just so serious..." Splutters Twilight
>"A-and then you did the-"
>She twitches her front hooves a bit, then resumes her deep, gut busting laughter
>Eventually, the two calm down
>"This party's gonna be great!  See you later Anonymous!"
>And with that, Pinkie Pie exits
>"Sorry about that Anonymous.  It was just so funny!"
>Well, you guess you're okay with this
>Funny things are meant to be laughed at
>Even if they occasionally happen to be you
 
Well Twilight, I think I better be going
>She gives you a look like you just shot her dog
>"Why?  You haven't finished explaining how your truck works"
If I keep going now, my voicebox will be shot.  I can always explain more later
>She p0nders this for a moment
>"You're right.  You know your limits."
>"So where are you going?"
I don't know
>You turn around and walk off into town
>Might as well get to know the place if you have some free time
>You wander through the streets, trying to get a sense of the layout
>It seems to be arranged radially from the town hall
>You file this bit of information away for later
>The p0nies in the streets no longer stare at you
>They just go about their business as usual
>You're surprised they have acclimated to you this fast
>Then again, this is magical p0ny land
>Maybe they see wierd shit like you all the time
>It just doesn't stick around like you have
>Your thoughts are interrupted by a hail
>"Hey Anonymous!"
>It's Applebloom
>She quickly runs up to you
Hey Applebloom.   How are you doing?
>"I'm doing great!  Hey, can you help me with something?"
>You glance at the sun
>The party is at sundown
>And you'd hate to be late
>But you've got plenty of time
Sure Applebloom, what do you need?
>She motions for you to bend down
>You do so
>You're almost on all fours
>She proceeds to whisper in your ear
>A somewhat wicked smile spreads across your face
>You do love a good prank
 
 
>You are Scootaloo
>And you're in the clubhouse
>Applebloom had told you and Sweetie Belle that she was bringing somep0ny she wanted you to meet
>But that was a while ago
>You're starting to get bored
>You're not sure you want to meet this p0ny anyway
>You just came here to test out the wicked new snow wheels on your scooter!
>Complete success, of course
>"I'm boooored" You voice to Sweetie Belle
>"Me too"
>A few minutes pass
>The boredom grows worse
>"Let's go find Applebloom.  Maybe she forgot about us"
>"Good idea" agrees Sweetie Belle
>You both approach the door
>It flies open before you can get there
>A long, black tube with a lump on the end shoved the door open?
>The thing pulls back through the door
>This time, a bigger thing appears
>It's all black
>And fills the entire doorway coming in
>It's making this wierd noise too
>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mACnGsmBZJQ
>Once through the doorway, it starts to unfold
>Up and up it goes
>You have to crane your neck just to see the whole thing
>And what you see there terrifies you
>Not only does it have no face
>It has a very familiar looking posterior hanging off the top
>It has Applebloom!
 
 
>You are Anonymous
>And this right here
>Is some funny shit
>It was simple enough to put on your scarf and goggles
>Then Applebloom led you to the clubhouse
>At her request you picked her up and set her over your shoulder
>And kicked the door in
>Then, doing your best darth vader impression
>You stepped through the door
>You can hear her sniggering next to your head
>Not too loud though
>In front of you, the two fillies Applebloom told you about stand perfectly still
>One is orange with a purple mane, and has wings
>The other is a creamy white with a curly pink and purple mane, and a horn
>Their eyes widen slowly as they travel up your frame
>The time is now
OOGABOOGABOOGA!
>That does it
>They run screaming to the far end of the clubhouse
>Welp, time for the fun to end
>You kneel and set Applebloom down on the floor
>Then you remove your facial coverings
>She walks over to her two friends
>"I told you I'd get you back!"
>The jig is up
>They both realize they've been had
>"That was a pretty good one Applebloom..." says Sweetie Belle
>"But who's your... big new friend over there?"  continues Scootaloo
I'm Anonymous
>They both blink
>"He's the one I was telling you about" elaborates Applebloom
 
 
>"Woah, you killed a timber wolf?"
Yep
>"How did you do it?"
>You snap your fingers together
I crushed it with my clamps
>"Really?"
Nah, I just shot it
>Sweetie Belle pipes up
>"You're tall"
Why, thank you for reminding me
>They laugh a bit
Well Applebloom, is there anything else you want?
>"Nah, I just needed to scare these friends of mine"
Then if you'll excuse me, I've got a party to attend
>You start squeezing back through the door
>"Right, the welcoming party."
>The trio of fillies follow you down the ramp
>You watch Scootaloo put on a helmet
>Then she jumps on a scooter with oversize wheels parked under the clubhouse
>"I'll see you there!" you hear her say as she flaps her wings and shoots off towards town
>Applebloom walks up to you
>"Can we walk with you?"
Sure, why not
>You start walking towards town with Applebloom and Sweetie Belle in tow
 
 
>You're about halfway there, and the two fillies are flagging
>It's been snowing steadily since this morning
>Something they evidently didn't anticipate
>They don't sink far into the snow
>Compared to you
>But their short legs make going dificult
>They're both tiring fast
>So you take the only logical course of action
>You pick up Applebloom
>And get a startled "Hey!" in resp0nse
>Then you put her on top of your hat
You looked a little tired.  I figured you could use ride
>"Wow, is this what it's like all the time for you?"
Yep
>A sniffle draws your attention to your left
>Sweetie Belle stares up at you
>The lip
>The eyes
>Yep, that's a pout
>You chuckle and pick her up
>Then deposit her on your shoulder, like you were carrying Applebloom before
>You must make quite an interesting sight as you plow through the snow
 
 
>Eventually, you arrive at Sugarcube Corner
>It is by now starting to get a little dark
>But you promised you'd go to this party
>You duck through the door
>Making sure to duck exta low so Applebloom doesn't have to introduce herself to the top of the door frame
>and join the party
>And what a party it is
>The place is absolutely packed
>You had been hoping Pinkie Pie would have a small party
>But apparently she doesn't do small parties
>Banners and streamers hang across the ceiling
>On the far wall a particularly large banner reads "Welcome to P0nyville!"
>One corner is lit entirely by strobe and laser lights
>A white unicorn with neon blue striped hair and purple goggles spins records and drops bass
>In front of her, the dance floor heaves and jumps
>Another corner is occupied by the food and refreshment tables, and even a small bar
>A third corner is mostly tables and seating
>And the last corner is full of party games
>You didn't know p0nies had twister
>As you rise to your full height, the music stops
>The lights come up and every eye in the place is on you
>What the hell, you only live once
THE PARTY DON'T START 'TILL I WALK IN!
>This seems to be exactly what was needed
>The DJ p0ny puts the needle down
>And everyp0ny goes back to what they were doing
 
 
>You remove Applebloom and Sweetie Belle from your head and shoulders
I think it's time we part ways
>"Okay!"
>They run off to join their friend Scootaloo, who is bobbing for apples
>You shed your cold weather clothing
>First thing's first
>You're starving
>You head straight for the refreshment table
>What a broad selection
>You load up a plate with some of the more scrumptious looking items
>Then fill up a cup with punch
>Now you have to find somewhere to sit
>Being roughly twice as tall as all the p0nies here has its advantages
>You peer across the room to the seating
>You spot Twilight sitting at a table
>Along with AppleJack, Fluttershy, and Rarity
>Even Rainbow Dash is at the table
>Although she's sporting an impressive set of crow's feet
>You make your way through the crowd and set your food down
>Move one of the chairs out, you sit down cross legged
>They all have some manner of food in front of them as well
>There's even silverware!
>You see Rarity and Twilight using magic to manipulate the forks and knives
>They had the forethought to furnish your place with a set
>You waste no time and dig in
>The food is every bit as delicious as it looked
 
 
>You all finish up at roughly the same time
>An akward silence descends up0n the table
>go go icebreaker
You look kinda tired there, Dash
>She glances over at you
>"Yeah, I am kinda tired."
>"Big, heavy snow clouds have been appearing out of nowhere"
>"I've had to work around the clock to keep blizzards off this place"
Wow, I didn't know weather manipulation was that demanding
>"For a regular pegasus, maybe... But I'm Rainbow Dash, The fastest flier in all of Equestria!  And I won't let a few snow clouds slow me down!"
>You glance around the rest of the table
 
>Rarity clears her throat
>"Anonymous, I can't help but admit my curiosity..."
Yeah?
>"You come from another world, correct?"
I do
>"I was just wondering what the fashion of an entirely different world would be like"
>Well crud
>You're not exactly what they'd call fashion suave
>But you do have a few pictures
>You pull out your wallet and remove a few pictures from it
>You pass two pictures to Applejack on your left
>The first one shows a smiling young man in army fatigues typical of the Vietnam era
>The second shows a white haired, somewhat bitter looking old man in a suit
>He has a scar that runs diagonally across his face from hairline to jaw
This is Gunnery Sargent Anonymous, Holder of the purple heart and the best damn father I could ever ask for.  He served three tours for his country in the Vietnam war.  The first picture shows him in army fatigues, designed purely for function.  The second picture shows him in a suit, which is considered acceptable wear for most formal occasions.
>The next pair of pictures you pass around are of a woman
>The first is a young lady in a nurse uniform
>The second an older woman in a flowing white dress
That is my mother.  She served in the Medical corps during the Vietnam war as a nurse, and fell in love with my father while treating his wounds.
The first picture shows her in a nurse uniform, designed for ease of cleaning.  The second shows her in a dress, which is considered formal wear.
 
 
>The final picture you pass around is of a young man that bears a striking resemblance to you
>He wears a pair of jeans, leather boots, a plaid button up shirt, a stetson, and a massive belt buckle
This is my brother, John Doe.  My parents divorced when I was young, and the courts decreed that my mother take him with her when she returned to Texas.  She changed her last name and his back to her maiden name, Doe, and he picked the name John for himself.  I never saw much of him, and when we did meet we usually mirrored our parent's conflict.
He is wearing attire typical of Texas, which I would imagine is similar to your "Mild West" region.  It is casual wear.
>As the last pictures come back around the table to you, you set them down in front of you
>Then you look up
>The entire table is staring at you
>Well, almost the entire table
>Fluttershy appears to be quietly crying into her cloth napkin
>Rarity and Twilight both have tears in their eyes
>AppleJack and Rainbow Dash merely look at you with sorrow in their eyes
>"Anonymous... I.. I had no idea..." says Rarity
>Your voice gains no small measure of venom
You say that like this
>You gesture to the pictures in front of you
Isn't a common occurrence
>A single tear rolls down her cheek
>Oh fuck
>Anonymous, you doofus
>In this land of diabetes-inducing cuteness and cupcakes, a story like yours probably isn't a common occurrence
Rarity, I apologize.  I don't know what came over me there, and I had no right to make assumptions like that. Can you forgive me?
>"Yes... Yes, I think I can find it in my heart..."
 
 
>That damnable silence is back
>Fuck that
>You don't need a pity party right now
>You need a party party
Twilight, you looked like you had a question earlier
>"Well, yeah..."
Go ahead
>"How do you know how to use silverware?"
Everyone uses it where I'm from
Lucky coincidence you have it her-
>You are interrupted by Pinkie Pie backflipping up to the table
>How does she even do that?
>And where was she before?
>"Hi Anonymous!  I'm so glad you could make it to your party!"
So am I...
>You're at loss for words
>But she isn't
>"Come on now Anonymous!  We can't have a party without the star player playing"
>She seizes your hand and drags you off towards the party games
 
 
>Several rounds of twister later, you wish the hellish game was never invented
>Sure, your longer limbs give you an advantage
>But you have to contort yourself to crazy angles
>Stupid game
>Pinkie Pie leaves to attend a few other party goers, and you seize your chance
>When the round finishes you extricate yourself from the tangled mess of limbs
>Now where to?
>You peer about
>Twilight is still at the table
>Reading a book
>There are several empty mugs next to her
>Fluttershy is...
>Hiding in the rafters
>Guess she doesn't care for the noise
>Rarity is at another table, with a few other classy looking p0nies
>And Rainbow Dash is at the bar
>Which leaves...
>Something pushes your lower back
>"Come on Anonymoush"
>It's AppleJack
>And she's fairly well along
>"Letsh head over by Rainbow"
>You shrug and allow her to lead you to the bar
>You never were much of a drinker
>But that doesn't mean you can't enjoy yourself every now and then
 
 
>You push two of the bar stools out of the way and sit down cross legged
>AppleJack and Rainbow are on either side of you
>The bartender, a stout looking brown p0ny with a moustache, eyes you
>"What'll ya have?"
>You look at AppleJack
>Then at Rainbow Dash
Whatever they're having
>"Apple Cider it is then"
>The bartender fills up a rather small mug and sets it in front of you
>You take a swallow and grimace
>The stuff is thin
>This must be what a Space WOlf feels like when he's out of Fenrisian Ale and has to drink regular Amnesiac
>AppleJack catches the look on your face
>"What?  Not schtrong enough for ya?"
No
>"Bartender, let'sh have shome of my finest"
>He rolls his eyes and produces a bottle
>"AppleJack Daniels" it reads
>Hardy har har
>Then he produces three shot glasses
>Tiny shot glasses
>This won't do
>He fills Rainbow's shot, then AppleJack's
>You reach over and take the bottle from him before he can fill yours
>You dump the rest of your apple cider in a sink behind the counter
>And fill your mug instead
>He shrugs
>You set the bottle back on the bar with a thump
>Rainbow Dash looks surprised
>As much as she can in her state, anyway
>AppleJack pounds you on the back
>"Atta boy"
>You all down the liquor
>Now THIS is more your speed
>Still thinner than what you're accustom to
>But it'll do the trick
 
 
>A few hours and a bottle of AppleJack Daniel's later, and you are feeling the buzz
>AppleJack points at Twilight
>"C'mon Twalit!  Join tha fun!"
>As she becomes drunker, her slur goes away and her accent becomes more pronounced
>Twilight gets up and joins you at the bar
>Rainbow Dash flutters over to Rarity and whispers something in her ear
>She trots over to join the four of you
>Fluttershy seems to have left
>You can see how something like this would be difficult for her
>Now that you're all settled, AppleJack motions to the bartender
>He sets down another set of shot glasses
>And, after a glance at you, a fresh mug
>You fill all of them with the current bottle
>AppleJack and Rainbow each take a shot in their hooves
>You're really going to have to ask them how they do that sometime
>Rarity and Twilight take their shots with magic
>As one, you raise your glasses in a toast
>Hmmmmmm...
To new friends
>And as one you down the shots
 
 
 
>The effect on Twilight is immediate
>Her cheeks turn a nice shade of red
>She gags a bit and loses her grip on the glass
>Which you deftly catch
>They all look at you in surprise
It's all in the reflexes
>You set the shot back down on the bar
>And examine the rest of your compatriots
>Rainbow and AppleJack are both pretty well along
>And Rarity had been drinking wine with her fancy friends
>So you're all feeling pretty good at this point
 
 
>"That..."
>"That was good!  I'll have another"
>Twilight looks at you
>You shrug and refill her shot glass
>Rarity is looking at you now
>"I suppose a few more can't hurt..."
>You fill hers as well
>They both swallow their shots
>Twilight manages to keep her grip on the glass this time, and sets it on the bar
>Then her eyelids droop
>"I think I need to..."
>She collapses on the floor, asleep
>Pffff
>Lightweight
>Then again, you don't suppose she finds many opportunities to go out drinking
>Rarity tuts at her
"The poor dear..."
>Then she turns to you
>"Now give me another"
>You're not one to get between a lady and her dirty pleasures
>So you oblige her
>Two shots later, she's snoring on the floor next to Twilight
 
 
I better go take these two home
>"Awwwwwwww"
Don't worry, I'll be back
>You walk over to your gear and put it on
>Then you pick up the two sleeping p0nies
>You walk over to Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo
>They're playing pin the tail on the donkey
Hey Sweetie Belle
>"Yeah?"
Are you staying with your sister tonight
>"Yup"
Could you show me where her bed is?
>"Sure"
>"It's about time we got going too" says Scootaloo
>The six of you exit into the cool night air
>Big Mac walks through the door after you
>"Come on Applebloom, let's go home"
>They trot off in the direction of sweet apple acres
>Scootaloo waves goodbye as she scooters off into the distance
>Leaving you and Sweetie Belle
She lives in Carousel Boutique?
>"Uh huh"
Well alright then
>You crunch off towards the clothing store
>After you enter and stomp your boots out, Sweetie Belle leads you up a flight of stairs
>And through the door on the left
>You set Rarity down on the bed and, using your spare arm, cover her with the blankets
>Then you walk back out into the hall
>Sweetie Belle is looking at you
>You don't like that look
>So you set Twilight down and follow her into another room
>You tuck her in under the covers
Good night Sweetie Belle
>"Good night Anonymous"
>You turn off the light and close the door
 
 
>Now you're walking down the lamplit streets
>You're carrying Twilight in your arms
>The crisp, cold night air is calming to you
>So much that you start to sing quietly
>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pISzxdEgDCU
 
 
>You are Twilight
>And you just woke up
>Somep0ny is carrying you
>you haven't been carried like this since you were a filly
>It feels good
>You open your eyes and look around
>You are traveling down the darkened streets of P0nyville
>And you can hear singing
>A pair of strong, black clad arms hold you firm in their grasp
>You look up to see Anonymous carrying you
>He hasn't noticed you are awake
>His singing is...
>Beautiful
>You could almost-
>Puke
>You lean over the edge of his arm and empty your stomach onto the snow covered ground
>Your eyes water
>He pats your back a bit
>When you finish, you look back up at Anonymous
>In his eyes, you find only sympathy
Done?
>"Yeah..."
>He reaches down and picks up some snow
>And with it he wipes off your mouth
>Then he kicks more snow over the vomit pile
>He turns and resumes his stride
>And his singing
>The gentle rocking motion and soft singing lul you back to sleep...
 
 
>You are Anonymous
>And you've been puke drunk before enough to know how much fun it isn't
>So you patiently wait for Twilight to finish
>When she's done, you wipe her mouth off and resume your stride
>Soon enough, she's back asleep
>You enter the housebrary to find Spike sitting at a table
>He's reading a book
>Makes sense
Hey Spike
>You whisper
Could you show me where her bed is?
>"I can do that"
>He gets down off his chair and leads you to the upper level
>You set Twilight down on the bed and cover her up
>Then you run down to the kitchen and grab a glass and a pitcher of water
>Spike eyes you curiously when you return
Trust me, she's going to want these in the morning
>You put them both on the night stand next to her
G'night Spike.  G'night Twilight
>And with that, you head back to the party
 
 
>AppleJack and Rainbow decided to celebrate your return to the party with another round of shots
>Followed up by a few more...
>So you are well and truly drunk now
>You feel like you can take on the world
>And you'll start with that dance floor over there
I'll be right back
>You say to AppleJack and Rainbow
>You get up and head for the stage
>The dance floor isn't quite as populated as it was when you arrived
>But you still have a little trouble making it up to the record table
>Guards appear from the crowd and move to stop you
>"No, no, it's alright" calls the DJ
>They reluctantly retreat, but continue to watch you
So you're the DJ, right?
>"Yeah. I'm Vinyl Scratch"
And you can do magic
>"Yup.  What of it?"
I have an idea
>"Really"
I'm gonna think of a good song from my planet, and you can dig it out of my brain
>"Well, I suppose I can try...."
>You're at the height of drunk logic right now
>The best kind of logic
>And nothing's going to stop you
>Not even an unwilling magical DJ unicorn p0ny
 
 
 
Nonsense!  Here
>You kneel down and present your forehead
Now do it
>Her horn begins to glow
Come on....
>"That's... That's quite the brain you've got there"
COME ON....
>"I'm not sure-"
>You grab the sides of her head and pull the tip of her horn up to touch your forehead
>You stare down through her purple goggles and into her red, red eyes
YOU CAN DO THIS!
>The glow gets brighter and brighter
>And then with a final, blinding flash, it finishes
>On the ground between you sits a new record
>You're bleeding a little bit from your forehead, but you don't care
There, see?  I toldja you could do it
>Vinyl appears to be in shock
>So you pick up the record and put it on the table
>Then you set the needle spinning and vault over to a clear spot on the dance floor
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2GSyQBdeEQ
>You start dancing up a storm
>The other p0nies on the floor seem to like the music and start dancing too
>The song ends, and Vinyl looks down at you from the stage
>"What now?"
Flip it over!
>"Of course..."
 
 
 
>She flips the record over and puts the needle down
>http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKTpWi5itOM
>This time you start your dancing slow
>And speed up with the song
>Pretty soon, you're on fire
>All the p0nies on the floor are cheering up a storm
>When the song finally finishes, Vinyl waves you back up to the stage
>"That music was AWESOME!  I've got so many new ideas now!"
>"We should do this again sometime"
That we should
>As she puts the new record into a fresh sleeve, you head back over to the bar
>Rainbow Dash is speechless
>AppleJack isn't
>"Woah Anonymous, ah didn't know ya could do that..."
Neither did I
>All three of you laugh
>And continue with the party