>Somewhere in the Normal residence 5 hours after Thanksgiving Dinner,  we find our dimensionally confused horse girl walking towards the Normals in their living room.
>”Thanks again for inviting me over for Thanksgiving Mr. and Mrs. Normal.”
>”Oh don’t worry about it Twilight honey, you’re always welcomed here.”
>”I really do appreciate the hospitality you’ve given to me all year Mrs. Normal, I have to make it up to you people!”
“Ahhh don’t worry kid, you’ve been here long enough you’re practically family now! Now come over and sit down; we’re gonna watch a movie. Courtesy of Norman’s private film collection.”
>As Norman’s father finishes, he takes out a DVD with the title “Ilsa She Wolf of The SS” and walks towards the set
>”Odd?”
>”Hmmmm, is something the matter Twilight?”
>The girl scratches her head wondering about the floating question in her mind, as Mrs. Normal waits for an answer
>”Yeah, where’s Norman? He’s usually playing his video whatchamacallits upstairs.”
>”He didn’t tell you? That boy really has a way with women doesn’t he, Herald.”
“A chip off the old block, Sweetbuns.”
>”Blocks, chipping, Sweet-buns?””
>Twilight was confused
>”You really aren’t around from here aren’t you, Twilight?”
>”YEAH! I mean no, no! Im just your average teenage High Schooler, who-is-just…..a transfer student from….huh….”
>She looks around the house in search of a name to use, she spots a left over Taco Shack wrapper on the counter
>”Froooooooom…….*ah*……Mexico!”   *Nailed it*
>”Mexico….huh…”
>Mrs.Normal looked skeptical
>Twilight starts to sweat a little
“Well that would explain her purple skin! You just don’t see many purple people around these days, unless you’re South of the border.”
>”Herald!”
“Waaaaat? Im being honest?”
>Mr.Normal turns back to give his wife a playful smile before returning to the TV set
>You live to see another day Twilight Sparkle
>”Sorry for my husbands’ rude-behavior, I guess we finally know where the family burden lies in.”
>“Oh don’t worry about that Mrs. Normal! It isn’t a big deal really!”
>Sipping from her wine glass Mrs. Normal moves around the sofa to give Twilight some room
>”Well! If you’re curious where my baby went, I let him and Bradley go off on there own for the night.”
>”Why?”
>Confusion takes Twilight again
>”He wanted to do some late night shopping, when Black Friday starts.”
“HA! Hahahahahahahhah…!”
>Mr.Normal bangs his hand on the TV set
“Nice one honey! Woooooo, haven’t had a good laugh in a while!”
>”But I did Herald, he did such a wonderful job cleaning up and fixing the lawn; I felt compelled too let him. He seemed old enough, I see why not?”
>A cold wind passed through the door as Mr. Normal remained still
>Slowly he stood up and stared out the window
>”Herald?”
“My Faust……”
>”Mr. Normal?”
>Both ladies looked at each other with concern
“When did he leave…..”
>“Herald?”
“WOMAN! When did he leave!…..”
>“A couple of hours ago, when your brother and his nephew left.”
>Twilight looked in awe at Mr. Normal’s sudden mood swing
“LINDA! What did you do!”
>He turns around completely frightened
“LINDA! They’re going to kill him Linda! Oh Faust they’re going to butcher him!”
>”Hrmm, I hate to break the moment here but is there something my missing here?”
>Twilight intervenes, as Mr.Normal gets dangerously close to his wife
>”Oh it’s nothing, Twilight. Just some silly holiday where people go shopping at very low prices.”
“Silly holiday….. SILLY HOLIDAY!”
>The sudden outburst startles the two
“Black Friday is nooooooo laughing matter!”
>He starts to point to the TV set
“You see that there? I had to fight hordes of people just to get that TV set, not to mention the 30 men I had to kill just get the damn thing out of the store, let alone drive back home!”
>”Herald your over exaggerating, you did not kill 30 men to get us that TV.”
>After hearing that remark Mr. Normal violently rips off his shirt revealing a multitude of scars all over his body, effectively scaring Twilight
“You see this here kid! I got that one from fighting one of dem apple boys years back once they ran out of beef jerky at S-Mart! I got this one from fighting Big Bessy in 98! This ones the newest addition, some snot nosed Orange skinned, purple haired kid from last year stabbed me when I wasn’t looking; OH and don’t ask me how I lost my right nipple because that could take two novels to talk about!”
>”Hughhh…”
>Mrs. Normal massages her temple’s at her husbands sudden stupidity
“Linda! Have you ever went out shopping on Black Friday yourself!”
>”Well no…..”
“See, kid! Take it from me, there’s a reason why they call it a “Black” “Friday”.”
>”Go on.”
>Twilight puts on a Gendo Pose and sits down(hands clasped, fingers crossed) fascinated by these turn of events
“Kid, since the dawn of time man has always loved  useless junk. Whether it be for a silly collection or one’s personal porno stash, if they saw it they took. No questions asked. As the years went by new things started to emerge and it became increasingly harder to get said new things; either because they were limited in number or some greedy jew hid them in his oven.”
>His wife face palms
“So faced with this rather difficult predicament (that could be probably solved with some juice and crackers) man was left to do the one thing it does best!”
>”And that is?”
>Twilight responds
“We beat the ever lasting shit out of each other. Whether it be fame, fun, women or bitches; we’re really damn good at kicking the snot out of each other! So with the need of buying useless crap and the ability to kick each others asses; you can see how it forms a rather dangerous mix.
>”But that doesn’t answer why its called ‘Black Friday’?”
“Kid, think about it. Wanting stuff + Primal needs + Fighting nature + Incredibly low door busting deals + Turkey dinner + Pie  + Erectile dysfunction + The Menstrual cycle + The damn Holiday season ; all on the same day each year, for the last 60 years! What does that equal?”
>Twilight stares on, blinking a few times
>”Honey, you’re missing some bits.”
“Huh? Oh yeah and some stuff about the economy or something-I don’t really know.”
>”Huh interesting….”
>”Twilight dear, don’t take this stuff seriously. Black Friday is nothing more than a silly holiday to buy stuff; yes some people do get hurt but all in all there’s nothing dangerous about………. Unlike final days of December, now thats something truly worth fearing ab-.“
*SMASH*
>The front door flies open as a horrible disfigured man walks through it
>”HAAAAAAAAAALP!!!”
>Brad collapses on the floor, all mangled up holding a limited edition ‘Patriots of Freedom’ Gamesphere
>”Brad!”
>”Bradley”
“Guitar kid!”
>They all run towards Brad with Mr. Normal shutting the door first
>”Brad what happen! Who did this too you!”
>Twilight gets to her kneels looking over the extent of Brad’s injuries
>”*Cough* I-I couldn’t save him *cough* th-they’re were too many of them-“
>”Save who!”
>”N-N-n-n-n….nnnn N-n-“
“Just spit it out boy! We aint got all day!”
>Giving Mr. Normal a glance, Mrs. Normal pitches in
>”Is it Norman?”
>”*Cough* Yes…”
>”Bradley, what did they do to my baby boy!”
>”uuhhhuuuuuuhhhhhhuuuhhhhh….”
>”Bradley? BRADLEY!?!”
>Mrs. Normal starts to violently shake the delirious boy
>”Mrs. Normal, maybe we should set him on the sofa.”
>”Good thinking Twilight.”
>Grabbing Brad by both ends, the girls lift him up and set him on the Normal’s sofa
>”ahhhhhahhhhhh-“
>”Someone should get a doctor, he’s drifting in and out of a comma.”
>Mrs. Normal quickly dials 911
>”The lines are down!”
“Hold on I know just the trick!”
>Mr.Normal quickly runs to the kitchen
>”*Cough* T-T-Twilight…”
>”Brad! What’s wrong!”
>”H-Here…”
>Brad hands over The Gamesphere to Twilight
>”He said *cough* he said, if he couldn’t make it. To give this to you…”
>Brad goes limp as Twilight examines the box, inside she finds a bloody beanie with a limited edition ‘Patriots of Freedom’ and a 20% discount on the up coming $90 dollar DLC pack with the Soviet Vampires expansion.  
>”OH FAUST MY BABY! WHAT DID THEY DO TO MY BABY!”
“Everyone make way!”
>Before Twilight could react, Mrs. Normal pulls her away from the sofa as Mr. Normal splashes a bucket of boiling hot water on Brad
>”AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *Breath* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
>Brad launches off the Sofa onto the middle of the living room, spazzing out while covering his face and rolling all over the floor
>”IT BUUUUUUUUUUURNNNSSS!!!”
>”Herald!”
>”Brad!”
“Whaaaat? I always do this to Norman when he doest want to get up.”
>”HAVE YOU EVER THOUGHT ABOUT USING COLD WA-UGHHH”
>Brad yells in agony as Twilight uses a pillow to clean his face
“Nope”
>Mr. Normal shrugs
>A moment passes as we now see Brad dressed up in Normans’ clothes, seating on the sofa, his face all covered in burn cream while sipping on a glass of iced tea
“So Kiddo, feeling better yet?”
>”A bit……..”
“Ha ha good. Now……WHERE IS MY SON!”
>Mr. Normal grabs Brad by his collar and pins him against the furniture
>”Okay! Okay! I’ll tell you anything! But please, some personal place man! And why are you shirtless?”
“None of your business.”
>He backs off
>”Please excuse my husband Bradley, he isn’t acting himself today.”
>Mrs. Normal gives a scornful look to her husband
>He shrugs
>”Bradley what happened?”
>He sighs
>”Everything is a blur, it just went so fast I………. I don’t remember; Im sorry.”
“Could you at least tell us where you two were heading? Faust kid! We’re talking about a life and death situation here!”
>”All I know is that something big happened and they took Norman! Where they took him is a complete mystery to me.”
>”Actually according to this receipt I found in Brad’s jacket, they went shopping at the local S-Mart.”
>Twilight interjects after Brad leaves the Normals’ disappointed with his information
>She presents the bloody slip of paper to the eager parents as Brad continues to sip on his iced tea
>”Oh Herald! What should we do!? Norman’s probably all alone and hungry!”
“There’s only one thing we can do Linda.”
>”You don’t mean…. “
“Get your gear on…..
>The camera pans over head close to Mr. Normal’s eyes
“We’re going in!”
>As he finishes the two adults part ways.
>Mrs. Normal went for the kitchen, while Mr. Normal the garage
>After a few moments Mrs. Normal returns decked out in heavy rubber clothing and carrying a garbage bag full of cleaning supplies
>”Kids get up you’ two are coming with us?”
>”What’s wrong? Mrs. Normal what’s happening?”
>She puts her bag down and places her hand on Twilight’s shoulder
>”If what Bradley is saying is true and my husband’s crazy theory is right, then we’re going to need all the help we can get.”
>”What?”
>”Now lets get going you two! Times a wastin, Chop; Chop!”
>”Ah come on! But Im the injured guy here!”
>”You’re also the guy who brought my son to the gates of hell, now come!”
>”Ow Ow Ow! Ow!
>Mrs. Normal starts to drag Brad by the ear with Twilight following suit carrying her bag as they head for the garage
>Opening the door we see Norman’s father putting on a construction chest harness (Still shirtless) with a large metallic H in the middle and a utility belt equipped with all sorts of power tools and equipment.
>”Kids put these masks on.”
>”Why?”
>Twilight asks the half naked crazed man
”Too hide your identity, so the police won’t start harassing you! What is this twenty questions!”
>They do what there told and the two adults put on masks of there own
“Now everyone, TO THE NORMAL-MOBILE!”
>The Normals rush towards their Honda Odyssey, a la Batman; with Mr. Normal sliding across the head of the car into the drivers’ seat and Mrs. Normal dropping in from the sun roof
>The other two get in from the side doors slowly
“Buckle in kids! This is going to be a bumpy ride!”
>In a sequence of dramatic scenes followed by comic book sound effects, we see the Normals’ activate/ do a series of actions in their minivan. Followed by the roar of the engine as Mr.Normal hits the gas and breaks through the garage door
>”Woah! Hey! You just destroyed your own house back their!”
>”Twilight, when the time comes and you have kids of your own you’ll see that nothing else will truly matter. Now shut up! And mix these two chemicals together!”
>Mrs. Normal shoves a series of red and blue bottles and empty mason jars to the blushing girl
>”How is any of this even legal!”
“Its not kid! Trust us we used to do this stuff around Christmas time before the internet became a thing! Linda here, never cared for Black Friday so she didn’t know before hand how bad it usually gets!”
>”Its true, I was always a supporter of banning this damn day to a saturday! It ruins the whole point of Thanksgiving!”
>”But-“
“As long as you do what we say, you’ll probably come out okay. Im not too sure about your boyfriend there though.”
>”I think I’m going to be sick….”
>And with that last remark from Brad, Mr. Normal activates the nitro as we see the camera pan far out to see the car accelerating at lighting fast speeds almost hitting several cars along its journey down the street. All the while, the ending notes of a modified 1960’s Batman TV theme plays in the background as the car flies away.
___________________________________________________________________________________
 
>”Pssst, Norman….Psssst…”
“Huh-huh uhhhh…five more minutes….”
>”Norman……..Norman!”
>The girl frantically tries to wake the sleeping boy as quietly as possible
>”Norman…….wake up!”
“Uhhhh w-whaat?”
>The boy shakes his head a couple times to wake himself.
“Rarity?…. What are you doing here? Wait, why are we chained up”
>”Too make a long story short darling, it would appear we got captured by some sort of cult.”
“A cult?”
>Norman looks around to get a better view of what was happening
>They were defiantly still at the S-Mart but outside of the store, on a giant stage, surrounded by hundreds of hooded figures
“Jeepers!”
>”You wouldn’t believe the half of it!”
>Rarity rolls here eyes
>”Those mongoloids not only ruined my new cashmere sweater but they had the audacity to steal my perfumes you were going to buy for me!”
“Wait, what perfumes?”
>”Oh just a set of Prim Hemline’s latest work, nothing too brag about really darling. You were seemly acting like the usual don you are.”
“I was?”
>”Indeed.”
>She gives off a half hearted smile as the thought sinks deep into Norman’s skull
“Hey! Wait one stinkin minute I never agreed to any o-“
>”Well! Looks who’s up; enjoy your beauty sleep?”
“Scott!”
>”The one and only.”
“Hurry, get a knife or something and cu-“
>”WHY YOU FILTHY SWINE! UNTIE US YOU FIEND!”
”W-What?”
>”Sorry Miss Rarity but that’s far from my jurisdiction, just try to relax a bit before the ceremony begins.”
“Scott! What the hell is going on!”
>”THE BRUTE IN FRONT OF US IS THE ONE WHO CAPTURED US!”
“Huh?!”
>”Sorry old sport, you’ll find out later tonight. Don’t want to ruin the surprise just yet, now do we?”
>”Suck on a pushing hemorrhoid, you filthy swine! I got better treatment when I was captured by the Diamond Dogs!”
“Diamond Dogs?!”
>”What rude language for such a self-proclaimed lady such as yourself? Well it won’t matter after tonight, I’d love to chat some more but I need to leave; they’re expecting me in at 1.”
>He finishes off with a rather doom-laden tone as he walks away
>”Rot in hell!”
“Damn it Scott, WAIT!”
>”See ya later tonight you two!…..It’ll be your last…”
_______________________________________________________________________
 
“Linda! How long till we reach the S-Mart!”
>”Almost there, just 10 minutes!”
>She states looking from the cars gps
“Damn it! I knew I should’ve gone with the turbo! We’ll never make it in time!”
>”Herald, keep hope we’ll be there soon.”
>Twilight interrupts
>”Ah Mrs. Normal, we’re finish packing those bottles.”
>”Oh, thank you. Sorry for making you do all this work but usually I have an emergency stock somewhere.”
>”Oh don’t worry about it! But…. Brad isn’t looking too well back here.”
>Brad shifts back and forth, looking pale as his skin is still fairly raw from the hot water from earlier
>”Those chemicals are definitely causing some sort of an effect on him.”
>”Don’t worry about Bradley, a little Nitrocellulose won’t cause any long term damage.”
“Yeah! He needs too suck it up like a man, that’s what he needs to do!”
>”I said I was sorry….”
“Sorry my ass!”
>”Bradley, when we get back; your parents and us are going to have a little chat!”
>”Oh man…………”
>Brad lays back in his chair as Twilight looks on with sympathy
>The car skids as Mr. Normal takes a hard right turn sending everyone to the side of the car
>Then back to the other side as he just nearly dodges a civilian  
>Twilight regains her composure and looks through the back window
>A massive car pile cars follows them as Mr.Normal speeds down the street seemingly with no police around
>”I hate to ask, but what’s the plan here?”
>She asks
“Simple, we ram in; we throw a couple of those bottles ; we get Norman and we return home. Now girl what don’t you understand?!”
>”Well…… everything!”
>She exasperates her response
>”Twilight, just leave most of the heaving lifting to us and your boyfriend. We’ll handle everything.”
>”W-wait BOYFRIEND!-”
“HOLD ON EVERYONE! ITS GONNA GET BUMMPY!!!”
>Before Twilight can finish, Mr. Normal unveils a large red button then extemporaneously smashes it with no remorse
>The acceleration forces everyone into their seats as they rocket into a mob of red robed figures
__________________________________________________________________________
>A large loud speaker screeches into the nigh as more hostages are brought to the stage
>The entire local law enforcement and S-Mart employees
>”Patricians and plebeians alike, we are gathered here in the magnificent event of hope; of unity; of fair product pricing!”
>The crowd goes wild in anticipation for the events to come  
>”For too long has the rich enslaved us with these outrageous pricing of the most basic of human necessities! For too long we stood watching, as they control; as they violate; as they rape the markets with their capitalist ideals!”
>A collective gasp is heard as Norman looks on with disbelief, Rarity….. she just looks bored
>”People of earth! Tonight is our hour to take back what is rightfully ours! We join all together, united to commit the ultimate act of anarchy!”
>Two random robed figures come carrying a veiled object and a large water gun  
>Several people with news cameras all rush to the sides of the stage, excitedly waiting for whats about to come
>”Tonight! The defiance to all set world standards and their barbaric ways of life; we sacrifice these brainwashed peasants to the ever forgotten but loving goddess of equality ‘Aequitas’!!! So that she may usher upon us a new age of enlightenment saving us of our sinful privileges and misogynistic thoughts; we offer their bodies as sacrifice to complete our baptism in the great goddess’s name!”
>Scott tears off the veil unveiling a gold studded, red lined dagger and pops open the water gun
“SCOTT! YOU CRAZY HIPSTER BASTARD! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!”
>The rest of the hostages scream as the captured police officers attempt to break their bonds
>”AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! This can’t be happening! I can’t go out like this, all tied up and bond to these rags! All the things I need to do, need to sew, all the magazines I need to read! This is thee-WORST-POSSIBLE-THI-“
*Slap*  
>A think piece of duck tape now lays on top of Rarity’s mouth
>”For paradise! I thought she never would shut up!  
“Scott! Think here for a moment buddy! Look at what you’re doing, the things you’re saying! IT’S INSANE!”
>The green boy kneels down, eye level and faces Norman dead on
>”Oh! Old sport, I’ve thought long and hard about the decision i’ve made; this world needs a cleansing. The pure blood that flows through the veins of Miss America has become clogged with saturated fat and unadulterated processed food stuffs. The nation has become disgusted with itself and begs for a savior to cure it from this degeneracy, to liberate it from the aryan mans grip on their fat neck!”  
>Scott comes uncomfortably close to Norman with a demonic grin burnt on his face
>”Now as much as I do love to talk, we’re 10 minutes behind schedule and im squeamish when it comes to blood.”
“GREENE! GREENE!!!!”
>”Tootles!”
>Scott grabs the tied weeping Rarity and drags her to the front
>”MMMMMMMMM!!!! MMMMMMMM!!!!”
>”quiet you!……Now where was I? Oh yes!”
>He grabs the knife and places it on her neck
>”TOGETHER AS ONE SISTERS AND BROTHERS THE TIME HAS COME!
“SCOTT NOOOO!”
>Time slows down as Scott slowly begins to point the dagger at Rarity’s jaguar vain
*BOOM*
”WOAH!”
>”WHAT TH-“
>”MMMMMMmmmmMMMmmmmMMMMMM!”
>A large speeding minivan explodes from the store’s entrance, ramming into everything as it drills into the mob of robed hipster cultists
_______________________________________________
 
”START THROWING THROWING THOSE BOTTLES’ GIRLS!”
>”OH CELESTIA! WE JUST RAMMED INTO THOSE PONY’S!”
>”YOU CRAZY OLD MAN!”
>Both Brad and Twilight scream in horror as Mr. Normal mows down rows upon rows of people
“GIRL YOU BETTER START OR I’LL THROW YOU INSTEAD!”
>Mrs. Normal starts to hand the two some bottles
>”Better listen to him Twilight, he’s done it before and I’ve still got the scars to show it”
>She gives a motherly smile before opening the sunroof and begins throwing her share of bottles
_________________
>Upon seeing the meat grinder heading towards his way, Scott drops Rarity and orders a couple of his lackeys to get weapons
“Wait-coul- DAD!”
>Norman eye’s lit up in realization over the incoming missile
*CRASH*
________________
>”Blood! There is blood everywhere!”
>”Twilight keep your focus on throwing! I can wash out the stains after we rescue my son!”
>As the vehicle crashed into the stage the group find themselves surrounded by masses of dead bodies and pissed off injured cultists
“You three keep throwing those bottles, I’m going in for Norman! Brad take that blanket off of your neck and get up! You’re coming with me!”
>”Wait Bu-AHHHH AHHHHHH!!”
>Before he could finish a cultist grabs one of his legs and starts to pull as more and more of them start to join in
>Mr.Normal grabs his steal hammer and knocks a couple of them off the car before heading for the kid
>A Tug-Of-War ensues between Mr.Normal and the mob as they fight to obtain Brad
>“Brad!”
“Twilight, keep throwing those bottles! I got this!”
>”OW OW! MORE PAIN! OW OW! MY PANTS, CAREFUL THEY’RE GONNA RIP MY -..”
>Mr.Normal gives one more jerk
>He manages to pull Brad from their grasp, at the cost of the boy’s masculinity as they rip off his jeans revealing a pair of boxer briefs with words “Lady Killer” printed on his bottom
>”……pants……”
>Mrs. Normal comes in and violent throws several bottles at the cultists who de-pantsed Brad
>The odd concoction of chemicals completely dissolve the boy’s pants and the flesh off a good number of them
>”SWEET CELESTIA!!, WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS WORLD!”
>Twilight shouts in alarm as the chemicals take effect on their unsuspecting attackers
“Crap! There’s too many of them! Everyone up on to the stage, we need higher ground!”
>The group complies and they climb to the top with Mrs. Normal throwing a large wine bottle at the overwhelmed vehicle, causing fumes of gas to erupt within the crowd
___________________________________________________
*clap* *clap* *clap*
>As the group regains their composure, a familiar green man approaches them with a hostage
>”How very unexpected!”
“KID YOU BETTER TELL ME WHERE NORMAN IS OR……oh wait there he is.”
>”DAD! RARITY!”
>Scott obstructs Mr.Normal’s view of his son as he dangerously puts the dagger close to the weeping girl’s neck
>Two other robed figures come wielding machetes from the store
>”Well! What do we have here…….”
>He glances at the group exhibited in front of him
>”Handy-man; CleanX-woman; Captain Underwear-“
>Brad blushes and covers his tights with the blanket around his neck  
>”and…….a Purple one.”
>The group looks at each finally noticing how ridiculous they look
>Well mainly just Brad
“Kid. This can go two ways! Th-“
>”Yes, yes we all know the generic quote and the answer is no.”
“Why I oughta!-“
>”Scott bro! What the hell are you doing here?”
>Brad steps up
“Kid stay back!”
>”Well! Look who it is Brad! Huh, couldn’t recognize you with all those burn marks on your face and that silly outfit.”
>Brad frowned
>”Dude, bro! Let go of the girl! I don’t know what the heck is going on but whatever it is, it shouldn’t involve killing anyone! Specially a girl as loin as Rarity!”
>After hearing Brad, Rarity’s face gets infuriated with rage
>”Tisk, tisk-“
>Scott shakes his head
>” always thinking about intercourse Bradley. You know it isn’t very healthy, you might catch something in the act or even worse cause something!”
>He says mockingly
>”Ugh, dude just let Rarity and Norman go and we’ll all leave alright?”
>”That isn’t an option Brad, and neither is letting you people leave now.”
“Kid listen to him, the last thing I want to do is spend another December in the Infirmary! So let the kids go and you can return to whatever the heck you were doing!”
>”Like I would listen to the likes of you! You people don’t understand that today is the day of reckoning, the day where we’re suppose to rise up against our oppressors! You’re all nothing but dogs to the oligarchs which rule the world, pawns of the capitalist society which rules our minds and our souls! If you think you can stop us by killing our people, besmirching our image and selling our brands, THEN YOU ARE WRONG!  DEAD WRONG! WE’LL PREVAIL IN THE END, WE’LL BE THE REMAINING ASHES OF HUMANITY THAT’LL SURVIVE THE COMING DAYS! NOTHING CAN DETER US FROM OUR GOAL, OUR NEW MEANING, OUR MISSION! NOTHING I SAY NO-“
>Before Scott  could finish his, Mrs. Normal throws a shallow brick at the flailing boy
>The impact imminently knocks the boy unconscious, dropping the girl
>”Good grief! I though he’d never shut up!”
>She finishes while tossing another brick in her hand
>Before the other three could respond, the two guards attack the group and a fight ensues between Mr. Normal and the hooded figure
>Armed with nothing but a pipe wrench and hammer, Mr. Normal scuffles a bit with his attacker as Brad and Mrs. Normal handle the other hooded figure wailing their machete like a maniac.
>”Twilight!”
>”Huh?!?”
>Mrs. Normal yells to the girl, still traumatized from the days events
>”Get Norman out, we’ll handle the guards!”
>Before a Twilight could respond more hooded figures begin to merge from the lower ends of the stage, all armed with all sorts of sharp appliances
>Mr.Normal, seemingly gained the upper hand of his attacker
>Lifts him up and throws the man at an emerging group snapping Twilight back into reality
“Norman! NOW!”
>”Eeep….”
>Twilight scuttles towards Norman’s direction
>She stops in front of her distraught friend first, considering she was the closest
>Using her remaining bottle and its contents, she frees Rarity from her bounds
>”OH THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THAN YOU! Twilight dear you HAAAAAD NOOOOO idea, what it was like all bound up like that!”
>She gives Twilight a grand big hug as the rest of the group is fighting onslaught upon onslaught of hooded cultists, all the while Brad is running around like a chicken with its head torn off as his boxers have some how caught fire
>”Huh…..Rarity?”
>”Mmmmm what is it Twilight dear?”
“GOD DAMN IT YOU TWO GO GET NORMAN ALREADY!”
>Mr. Normal yells as he pile drives an suspecting cultist while his wife is suffocating another one with a bad
>The sudden outburst from Mr. Normal, caught both girls from surprise; prompting them to jump in their position and run around in place before speeding off to the confused Norman in a very cartoon like fashion
“Finally! Hurry up before more of those guys come!”
>Twilight using the remaining chemical liquids melts apart Norman’s bounds and frees the kid
>”Norman, what in the sweet merciful name of Equestria is going on here!”
>She shakes the boy relentlessly
“Crazy cult! Religious hipsters and Doorbusting Sales! Can we please get out of here befo- RARITY LOOK OUT!”
>Rarity turns around to see a hatchet wielding cultist preparing to strike her down
>As she screams in terror, Norman lounges in front of her ready to take the blow astonishing the girl in his bravery
>As he waits eyes shut for the coming blade, nothing comes
>He opens his eyes to see none other than Brad holding the mans arms from striking the two, still seemingly puffing out smoke
>”Can’t hold this guy forever man!”
>With one swift strike, Norman launches the cultist to a world of pain as his manhood is quickly smashed by his kick
>He drops his weapon and falls on the floor quivering
>”Nice shot ma-“ *WHAM*
>Brad is cut short as Rarity delivers swift kick to his unmentionables
>”BRAD!”
>“mama……”
>”THAT’S FOR ABANDONING US YOU SPINELESS BEAST!”
>She kicks the downed boy one more time for good measure as Twilight rushes to the boys aid
“RARITY!”
>”Oh pish posh Norman, the boy had it coming for a while now.”
“Yeah but- okay maybe you’re right on that one.”
>”You know, that was very heroic of you; jumping in to take the blow for me. I-I guess I have to give you something fairly grand in return now huh?”
“Oh phffffff, no Rarity.You don’t owe me anything, heck anyone would have done it! Especially for a girl like you….”
>”But darling! I insist, it would be very un-ladylike of me not too!”
>The two slowly approach each other, their heads roughly a few centimeters away
>”Plus I really want to anyways…..”
“WOULD YOU TWO JUST KISS ALREADY!  WE’VE GOTTA GO!”
>Mr.Normal yells as multiple cultists attempt to dog pile the blood soaked nippleless man holding two of them in a headlock, suffocating them to death
>”Yeah, maybe its time to go.”
>Twilight chimes in irritatedly while carrying an injured Brad on her shoulder
>Just then the Normal’s Honda Odyssey pulls up near the edge of their area of the stage with Mrs. Normal driving inside
>It’s color has completely corroded off and it’s hood was destroyed covered in all sorts of bodily fluids
>”GET IN!”
>They follow her commands and enter throughout the Sudan’s ruined sunroof
>Rarity in first with the most care, then Norman, then Twilight and lastly Brad
>Once everyone was in, Mrs. Normal hits the gas and starts doing circles around the stage
“MOM! What about dad!”
>”Just giving him some more time sweetie!”
>She says irritatedly
>The car sways back and forth sending its unbuckled passengers into a frenzy of screams (mostly caused by Rarity)
>After the sixth loop, out of nowhere Mr.Normal crashes through the windshield (A-La-Brock Samson) bathed in blood with both nipples crudely reattached to his chest
>”AHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
“Would someone shut that girl up! Faust almighty! Does she ever shut up!”
“DAD!”
>”Mr. Normal!”
>”……it still….hurts…..”
>”Herald! What took you so long!”
“Sorry Linda, I had to release those other guys and I had to make a couple calls first!”
>And with that last remark, the Sudan speeds recklessly out of the S-mart parking lot and into the dead morning street as heavily armed military personnel arrive to the scene
_______________________________________________________
“Im sorry things didn’t turn out the way we planned it Rarity.”
>”*sigh* Its alright darling, I can wait another year before my perfume goes on sale again.”
>Rarity looks towards her parent’s car as they drive up near the Normal’s residence
>Norman looks away as he prepares to head back home
>To start his punishment for tonights events and probably see Purple fool around with HER new Game Sphere in its Sphereical glory and probably prevent her from destroying it while trying to find out how to play with it.
>”But……..”
“Huh?”
>He looks back
>Before anything is said, Rarity gives him a quick peck on his check
“It’s nice to meet a real gentlemen, when I see one.”
>Before hurrying towards her car
>”See ya Norman!”
>She waves to him as the car drives off
>Norman is left there gleeful and depressed knowing it’ll be another two months before he can ask her out again and having to pay Brad’s medical bill in the coming weeks
 
The End