[Scene opens on the office in the morning and everyone working diligently. DWIGHT SCHRUTE is staring intently at his monitor, his nose mere inches away from it while clicking exaggeratedly every few seconds.
JIM HALPERT raises his eyes from his work and stares at DWIGHT skeptically.]
JIM: Hey Dwight.
[DWIGHT remains completely engrossed in what he is doing.]
JIM: Yo, Dwight.
[DWIGHT continues to ignore JIM.]
JIM: Whatcha doin’, Dwight? [leans forward to get a better view of DWIGHT’s screen]
[DWIGHT stands up abruptly and rapidly places one spread palm on his monitor while glaring peevishly at JIM.]
DWIGHT: What do you want, Jim?
JIM: Nothin’, really. Just wondering what you’re so engrossed in.
[DWIGHT returns to his chair and rotates his monitor slightly away from JIM.]
DWIGHT: I’m playing none of your business. It’s a fun game. You should try it sometime.
JIM: Soooo you’re playing something, then.
DWIGHT [visibly flustered]: Yes. It’s the new Call of Duty, exclusive for Xbox. Now go do your work.
JIM: But you’re using a PC. [points to DWIGHT’s computer]
DWIGHT [swiveling in his chair to face JIM]: Of course I am. Fact: PCs can run anything a console can, usually with better quality and at a faster framerate. You’d have to be a complete imbecile to prefer conso-
JIM [leaning across his desk to stare at DWIGHT’s monitor]: What’s “Katawa Shoujo”?
[DWIGHT quickly returns to his chair and shoos JIM away from his desk.]
DWIGHT: Nothing.
JIM: It didn’t look like nothing.
DWIGHT: That’s because you’re an idiot.
 [JIM leans back in his chair and places his hands behind his head]
JIM: I’m just curious, that’s all.
DWIGHT: No you are not. You are just trying to embarrass me and that will not work. I do not feel that emotion.
[Cut to interview]
DWIGHT: Schrute children are trained from a young age to eliminate any emotions that might possibly lead to weakness. Embarrassment, guilt, concern for others’ well being, all eliminated. The only thing that sets us apart from machines is our ability to lust. But not love. There is a distinct difference.
[Cut back to office]
JIM: Dwight. I promise you I am genuinely interested in anything that has the ability to keep you quiet and entertained for a prolonged period of time.
DWIGHT: Fine. But only if you tell no one else.
[Cut to interview with DWIGHT]
DWIGHT: I don’t like to hide my hobbies from other people. Quite the contrary. [Cut to scene of DWIGHT playing basketball in S1E2 wearing an anime t-shirt] I am not the least bit afraid to let other people know that I am a man who is capable of appreciating many diverse, complicated aspects of other cultures. However, I do have a reputation to uphold as office tough guy. Some sacrifices are worth making.
[Cut back to office]
JIM: Absolutely I won’t. So what is it?
DWIGHT: Katawa Shoujo is a visual novel.
JIM: That tells me almost nothing. Show your work.
DWIGHT: First – you are not my teacher. I do not have to do what you say. Second – a visual novel tells a story that is usually accompanied by illustrations and music, all of which combine to create a narrative experience that is vastly superior to text alone.
JIM: And Katawa Shoujo is one of those? It sounds Japanese.
DWIGHT [scoffs]: Of course not. It was written in English.
JIM [raises an eyebrow]: But it has a Japanese name.
DWIGHT: Merely an allusion to the true masters of the visual novel craft.
JIM [shrugs]: Whatever you say. Can I ask what it’s about?
DWIGHT: I don’t know, can you?
JIM [rolling his eyes]: May I ask what it’s about?
DWIGHT: You assume the role of Hisao Nakai, a high school student who transfers to a new school. While he is there, he encounters several ravishing young women with whom he develops progressively complex relationships. Depending on the choices you make, you decide the direction in which these progress. I wouldn’t expect you to understand it.
JIM: So you get to act out your fantasy of being a teenager on a booty call?
DWIGHT [looking offended]: Booty call? Really, Jim. This isn’t something that basic and crude. This is a complex, deep, and involving story that builds characters and stories that connect with the player on a rich, meaningful level. I wouldn’t waste my time on anything less.
JIM: Uh-huh.
DWIGHT: Yes. Now if you’re done, I’d like to return to what I was doing.
[DWIGHT faces his monitor once more and resumes his manic clicking. Some time passes.]
JIM: So which girl is your favorite?
DWIGHT: What?
JIM: You said there’s several girls to choose from. Which one does Dwight Schrute fancy?
DWIGHT: Lilly Satou. She’s tall, blond, blind, we share European ancestry, motherly, solid birthing hips. She’s ideal waifu material.
JIM: Wait, I’m sorry, I thought I just heard you call her your “wife”.
DWIGHT: No, Jim. Waifu.
JIM: What’s the difference?
DWIGHT: If I have to explain it to you, you will never understand.
JIM: Evidently. Don’t you think you might be getting a little too involved with these imaginary characters?
DWIGHT [shaking his head]: Jim, Jim, Jim. That is something I would expect you to say. I’m telling you I can’t explain it. You just have to play it yourself and maybe you’ll see what I mean. I doubt it, though.
JIM: Do I have to go to some special store somewhere? I get the feeling they don’t sell this at Best Buy.
DWIGHT: No one sells it. It’s free to download online.
JIM: Can you email me the site?
DWIGHT [rolling his eyes]: Oh my God. Google, Jim, have you ever heard of it?
[JIM puts his hands up]
JIM: Okay, okay. Soooo…what girl should I choose first?
DWIGHT: What kind of question is that? Whichever one feels right.
JIM: Well, I don’t want to go in flying blind. You have to tell me about these girls before I think about anything serious.
DWIGHT [sighs]: Fine. I’ve already told you about Lilly. The rest are Shizune, the deaf student council president. She’s highly competitive and headstrong. Then there’s Rin. She’s armless, but still enjoys painting. However, she has trouble expressing her feelings. Emi is legless, but runs on the class track team using prostheses. Hanako’s body is half covered in burn scars, so she is timid and frightened as a result.
[Cut to interview]
DWIGHT: I like her least.
[Cut to office]
JIM: Wait. Burn scars, armless, legless, deaf, blind…why are they all handicapped?
DWIGHT: Is that a problem? I should have known you were too narrow-minded for this, Jim.
JIM: Dwight.
DWIGHT: Yes, Jim, they’re all handicapped. Yamaku is a school for the disabled. All the main characters are disabled.
JIM: So then this is a game about romancing handicapped teenagers.
DWIGHT: Don’t put it that way.
JIM: So it is.
DWIGHT: Yes.
JIM: …Okay.
[JIM rises from his chair and strides briskly over to break room, refusing to make eye contact with DWIGHT, who stares at him pleadingly.]
DWIGHT: Wait, no, Jim! Jim! JIM!
[Cut to opening sequence]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z_9OGnmBTow