>you recently bought Counter-Strike 1.6
>in the year 2012 (that's pretty fucking late dude, the game's been out since 1998)
>thanks to your new headset, your game has improved greatly, now that you can hear footsteps better and communicate to your team through the built in microphone
>you've been playing for a good three hours now
>theres also a ball of fluff knocking into your leg with its skull
>"Daddy, Fwuffy hungy! Wan skapetties![spoiler]it's how i used to say spaghetti when I was like 3"
"Shut the fuck up." You reply, giving Fluffy the cold shoulder.
>"Tummy huwt... Wan nummies..." it mumbles
>you feel some tugging on your left leg
"Fluffy", you turn away from the screen, "I'm doing something very important right now. Leave Daddy alone."
>"Game mo impowtant den fwuffy...?" it lowers its head
"I've been training for this match for weeks now, I can't just leave half way through. I'm sorry, but you are just going to have to deal with it."
>Fluffy doesn't try to argue
>As retarded as it is, it knows you won't get off your game
>Its been [spoiler]one week since you looked at me[/spoiler] about a minute since Fluffy pony stopped bothering you
>de_dust2
>be terrorist
>last round of the match
>game is tied
>game point
>You are coming up on A-Long chokepoint - it's a clutch , 5 against 1, but you got this - this is the shit you
practiced hours for
>one
>two
>three dead
>the fourth one is by bombsite A with an AWP, hailing bullets on your position
>you hear a fifth one trying to sneak up behind you but you kill him as he gets out of the doors to Long A
>switch to your nades and throw a smoke into the opening
>it would take too long to run all the way around to catwalk and try to get him from there - besides, you'd be a sitting duck by the stairs
>its now or never
>switch to flashbang
>fire_in_the_hole.wav
>turn the corner
>screen goes black
>"Fwuffy wuv shiny fwend!"
"FLUFFY POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONYYY" you belt at the top of your lungs.
>An ancient evil has awakened
>this summer
>coming to a theater near you
>dear gaben
>fat
>episode 3
>dragon dildos
>RAGE
>get up out of your chair
>look behind the desk on your left
>fluffy pony is standing next to the extension cord
>its stubby hoof is covering the power switch
>it thought the red glowing switch was a new friend
>that feel when you would have won a $15,000 prize