Days upon days spent in darkness, weeks spent huddled against the howling wind, months of solitude, years of denial. Just half a life, really, a man just half alive. Big blind eyes that shun the world, a permanent scowl, no true emotion - just a vague sense of anger, a feeling something is wrong, somehow. I woke up in the dark, went to sleep in the dark, shared my bitterness with the dark. This was my life - not any sort of life at all.
 
And you were my sunrise.
 
A pale ray of light, breaking through. At the time it seemed like an impossibility, and yet there you were. Wonderful, terrible, understanding. I reached out, and you grabbed my hand. You never flinched when I told what a horrible person I am, and how much I hated the world. I cried on your shoulder and told you how broken I was, I told you I was afraid, cold, alone - and you got it.
 
That's what you said, wasn't it? You got it. You got me. I opened my blind eyes and saw light. I rubbed them, dazed, and saw beauty. I blinked in amazement, and suddenly I saw the world, basking in light, and all I needed to do was join it - let the sun's rays rest on my skin, let this frozen tomb thaw. I was alive, I was whole. I was ready to join life, the same life I shunned for so long. It was worth it. All worth it. Days of darkness, weeks of cold wind, months of solitude, years of denial, all worth it now, all washed away in the glory of a new day.
 
It didn't last.
 
You didn't have to lie. I would have understood, I could have continued my life as it was. Just half a life, just half alive. I could have kept on going, and died never caring you existed. You told me you understood, and you lied. I believed you, swept away in a daze of euphoric confusion, but it didn't last. You told me eventually. Too late, really, but you have. I told you it was alright. For a while, I felt that it really was alright. I thought I could keep on going without the sun. I was used to the cold, wasn't I? I could've just returned to my days of darkness, like nothing ever happened. The dark, the cold, the solitude, the denial, I thought I could just return to them and think nothing of it.
 
I don't want to, I really don't, but the sun has set.