>Day FUCKETY FUCK in Equestria. >You are mad. >Very, very mad. >Today was fine. You woke up as normal. You had a shower as normal. You came downstairs as normal. >That is when you noticed it. >It that was missing. >Your notebook. >Somep0ny has stolen your spiral notebook. >Somep0ny who will soon be very, very, dead. >You storm back and forth in your house, muttering, cursing, gesticulating. >Who could have done such a despicable thing? >Who was here recently? >Pinkie Pie. >The pink fluffy airhead had invited herself over for lunch yesterday. >Yes, you are sure she must have taken it. No doubt she is reading it this very minute, flailing her hooves in laughter. >They will never find her body. >You barrel out of your front door and make for Sugarcube Corner. >Ponies cry out and cower as you pass them, swinging your arms like the T-1000, face stretched into a murderous glare. >There, ahead of you. The colorful distinct shape of the bakery. >Suddenly a pink blob bounces out of its front doors. >Target sighted. >You pump your legs harder, closing the distance. She spots you and waves. >"Oh hey Anon!" >With all your might, you tackle the pink pony to the ground. >Hooves and limbs flail as you both twist and turn in the dirt. Soon you have her pinned, your face pressed against hers. "Where is it? WHERE IS IT?" >"Augh...ah...W-what?" She chokes out. "WHERE IS MY NOTEBOOK!? MY SPIRAL NOTEBOOK. GIVE IT TO ME. I know you have it." >She squeals in terror, seeing her death in your eyes. >"A-anon, I don't know what you're talking about!" She speaks in between gasps. "Yesterday. You were at my house. It was on the desk. Pieces of paper attached to a spiral loop. Now it's gone. Do you have it?" >"N-no. W-hy don't you ask Twilight?" "What? Why Twilight?" >"S-she regularly goes through your things. The Princess t-told her to-" >You hear no more. The roar of raging blood has filled your ears again. >You leap to your feet, the quivering pink pony lying forgotten as you charge towards the library. >Upon reaching it, the door is no match for your almighty foot. "SPAAARKLEEEEEEE!" >The unicorn looks up from her book with a start. >"Anonymous, what a pleasant sur-" >Her words die as you tackle her, closing your hands around her throat. >Unlike Pinkie, she has magic at her disposal. >Suddenly your hands are grasping around air as you are thrown back. >"Anon, what in all of Equestria was that for?" She glares at you upside down. >Actually, you are upside down, suspended in midair by a magical field. You begin thrashing and cursing her name to the depths of Tartarus. "Where is my notebook!? I want it back, NOW!" >"Your...notebook?" She regards you with a confused expression. It only makes you thrash harder. "My spiral notebook!" Pinkie said that you go through my things, so I know you took it!" >"Oh." Her face pales, and she looks away guiltily. "You weren't supposed to know. Please understand, I only did it to-" "I don't care! Just give me the damn notebook!" >She looks back at you, appearing relieved that you aren't pressing the issue. >"Your notebook? I think I may have picked it up last night when I was...yeah, uh, I did pick it up." >She turns to look around her pile of books, relaxing her magical hold on you. >You gently drift to the floor, ready to spring into action. >"Hmm, that's strange, I could've sworn it was here. Urgh, I bet Spike has something to do with this-" "Where is he?" >You are right behind the mare. She turns and recieves the full fury of your glare. She blanches a little. >"Uh, Anonymous? A little personal space, please?" "Where is he?" >"Uh, Spike? He said he was going over to the Cutie Mark Crusader's clubhouse today. Look, if he has your notebook-" >You do not hear her. You have dismissed her already as you turn and run from the Library, heading in the direction of Sweet Apple Acres. >You swear, on all that is holy, if Spike has read your notebook, you will have a new pair of dragonskin shoes for winter. >The clubhouse comes within sight as you dodge between trees. >From this distance, you can hear filly laughter. It chills your spine and sends your blood into overdrive. >No. No they didn't. They didn't. >You zip up the stairs and launch at the club door, using your entire body as a battering ram. >Instead of opening, the tiny hinges buckle under your weight and the door falls flat with you on top of it. >Dust fills the room. Three high voices and one low voice cry out in shock. >You zoom in on the low voice, pinpointing its location. You scrabble forward and close your hands around a scaled foot. >With a yelp, you drag Spike forward, his terrified look filling your vision as you bear down on top of him. "Give, me, the notebook." >He stares at you blankly. You collect your breath for a second. "Give me my spiral notebook. Now." >"You mean this?" Scootaloo calls to you. >Your head whips around as the dust finally settles. >Scootaloo is waving a hoof at you, surrounded by her friends Applebloom and Sweetie Belle. >On the floor in front her it rests. >Your spiral notebook. >Immediately you make a dive for it, but the filly drags it out of reach with a hoof. >"Is this yours, Anonymous?" She asks with a grin. >No. No, no no no no. Please, please say it isn't so... >She grins even more upon seeing your pained look. >"Me and the girls here, were just, giving it a skim..." She pauses to titter lightly behind a foreleg. Applebloom and Sweetie Belle are both trying to hold in giggles. >No, they didn't- >"It's very...interesting..." Applebloom manages to say before pressing a hoof into her mouth. >"Quite a good...fantasy..." Sweetie Belle forces out, ducking her head to the floor and shaking. >NO. THEY CAN'T HAVE. NO NO NO NO- >Scootaloo fights to regain control as she speaks. >"Tell me, have you always had such...fantasies when writing about...the Mayor?" >With that last word, all three fillies explode, their bodies racked with laughter. >With that last word, a keening sounds in your mind. >You tremble as you feel hot and cold flashes creep up your back. >The world fades into darkness, leaving only you to mourn the loss of your secret. >Without a word, you gather the spiral notebook close to you. You look down upon the current page, detailing how you slowly lower yourself into the Mayor's gaping sphincter as she moans lustfully. >What was once your private magnum opus is now sullied. >Tears slowly drip onto the paper as you imagine everyp0ny you know standing before you, laughing, cajoling. >You imagine Twilight, embarassed and disgusted. >Pinkie, childishly spewing raspberries. >Spike, guffawing and- >Spike. >SPIKE. "SPIIIIIIIIIIKE!!" >You turn to the baby dragon. He is still cowering on the floor. >"A-Anonymous, please, I-" "You. Are. Dead. YOU HEAR ME? DEAD!!" >With a gulp, he makes a break for it, jumping out of the clubhouse window. >You follow him, rolling as you hit the ground. >Spike runs off between the trees as fast as his little legs can carry him. >You are close behind, yelling as loud as you can about all the things he is going to experience.