Blue Period
 
1
 
Akira Satou didn’t consider herself to be an art connoisseur. For one thing, it had just never been a priority in her life. She had dabbled in it back in her school days, pencil sketches mostly, but even then, she had other concerns. Between academics, athletic competitions, and the occasional party, she didn’t have much time for her idle doodles. Then school ended, and she learned the true meaning of busy. Raising her little sister alone while simultaneously climbing the corporate ladder didn’t allow for many such creative pursuits.
 
Second of all, in her experience anyone who seriously considered themselves a connoisseur of anything was far too stuffy and pretentious for her to tolerate.
 
That said, she could appreciate a good piece of art when she saw one, and she was seeing a whole gallery of art that appealed to her. The 22nd Corner wasn’t a particularly large gallery, and it seemed even less so when it was packed wall to wall with visitors, but on this day, a single artist’s work filled it. On every wall that she looked, Akira saw vibrant warm colors in bizarre dreamscapes, surrealistic representations of human faces and body parts in different positions and combinations, ranging from the disturbing to the erotic to just downright indescribably weird.
 
She stood before it all in her typical business attire, the pinstripe suit standing out almost as much as her wild blond hair in the nearly homogenous nation-state of Japan. No matter how long she lived there, no matter how successful she was in law and the business world, her partial Scottish heritage would always mark her as an outsider, a foreigner in her native land. It was an unfair, unpleasant truth she had learned to live with, hiding her misgivings beneath a façade of eternal confidence. A steady supply of alcohol helped, too.
 
That was partly why the offer she had received from her estranged family was so attractive. She would be leaving behind everything she knew, everything she had earned with blood, sweat, and tears. In return, though, she would get a guaranteed job within the family business and a hefty pay raise, and while she would always be caught somewhere between two worlds, over there she could have greater acceptance. Greater…understanding.
 
She had made a hard choice years ago, and if faced with it again, knowing what she knew now, she would choose the exact same thing. There were few certainties in life, but this was one thing Akira considered an absolute: she loved her younger sister, Lilly, and she would do anything for her well-being. When her father had decided to leave the country for better business prospects, he had decided to leave his youngest daughter, born blind, behind to be cared for by her ailing grandparents and taught in a school for the disabled. Conveniently out of sight. Rather than go with her parents, Akira had chosen to stay behind for her sister’s sake.
 
It had not been easy. In her youthful confidence, Akira had no idea how hard it would be, supporting herself and a blind child at the same time, on her own, in a harsh, unforgiving world. There were many days when she was sure she couldn’t make it, that all the stresses had worn her down to her breaking point and that she could go on no longer. But someone she loved depended on her, so…she found a way. She found strengths she didn’t even know she had. She survived.
 
But mere survival could only satisfy her for so long. Now, she had an opportunity for something more. Sure, it required her to accept something from her father, and that left a sour taste in her mouth, but she could stand that little degradation. She had to give up her car, and it was a damn nice car. She had to give up her boyfriend. That may have been the most painful sacrifice. He was a nice guy, and he had treated her well, but he wasn’t coming along, and a long distance relationship was out of the question. It just wasn’t meant to be, and they both had come to accept it.
 
Lilly was growing into her own, had her own aspirations, and even had herself a boyfriend now. Hisao wasn’t the brightest guy Akira had ever met, but he had a good heart, figuratively speaking. That was a rare quality. Lilly didn’t need her anymore. This was a great opportunity. It was a chance for an easier life, to enjoy the fruits of her labors. The die was cast; she had committed herself to this path.  She had earned this, dammit!
 
So why did she feel so awful about it?
 
Well, a large part of it was the nagging feeling that her sister was about to make the mistake of her life, and Akira had failed to stop it. Familial loyalty was something the two sisters shared, but whereas Akira was more particular about which part of the family she was loyal to, Lilly was softer hearted. Forgiving. She wanted a connection to the parents who had left her behind, seeking to fill some void she thought was in her life.
 
Akira felt like a failure. With all her struggles to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table, she never had enough time to spend with her sister. So much so that Lilly had to do the cooking and housekeeping. She wasn’t a very good parent, to her shame. So of course, Lilly was perfectly willing to leave her friends and her dreams and cross to the other side of the world looking for that greener grass.
 
She needed a drink.
 
Perhaps it was these thoughts that caused one particular painting to resonate with her. Unlike most of the others, this one was almost an even split between warm and cool colors. A woman with long, black hair and a white dress stood on blood red ground next to what appeared to be a purple mountain against a blue sky. Closer to the viewer was a slightly hunched, blue figure, separated from the woman by rising pillars…or was it a city skyline? It evoked a sense of loneliness and longing in Akira. Was that what the artist felt when he or she painted this? Or was she simply projecting her own feelings onto it?
 
For that matter, who was the artist? Akira’s mind had been occupied when she entered. All she had caught was the theme of the gallery for the day: Nameless. Taking a closer look at the paintings, she could see why: none of the paintings had names or labels in any fashion, which struck her as out of the ordinary. Perhaps the intent was to leave the paintings entirely up to the viewer’s interpretation. Perhaps the artist was just too lazy to come up with names for them. Akira shrugged. Coming here wasn’t really her idea in the first place. She didn’t spend her free time checking out art galleries or museums. It just turned out that a client of hers had a thing for art and had invited her out as thanks for a job well done. Her co-workers had given her their blessing for this little break. A gift before she left their lives forever.
 
Akira let out a quiet sigh, the sound lost in the drone of conversation. Crossing her hands behind her back, her eyes swept over the crowded room, taking in the sight of the guests, almost uniformly dressed in formal wear and very few of them actually paying attention to the artwork. There were a few here and there, like her, who were intrigued by the paintings, but for most, it just seemed to be an excuse for a social gathering. The one exception to the rule she could immediately see was a girl with sandy brown hair tied up in pigtails restlessly wandering the room, giving the paintings a look halfway between bored and confused. Another notable feature: she was missing her legs bellow the knees, walking around on prosthetics. Huh. A student from Yamaku? That academy was not terribly far away from the city.
 
As she wondered what a student from that school who obviously had little interest in art was doing in a place like this, her ruby eyes were drawn to a flash of crimson in the center of the room, concealed by the passing guests. Her lingering doubts about Yamaku’s involvement were swiftly erased when she spotted the familiar male school uniform worn by a boy…no, check that, girl, who seemed to be missing her arms. Her sleeves dangled empty from her uniform, tied into knots to seal them shut. Her shirt was not tucked in, and her strikingly red hair was a wild mess, giving the distinct impression that she had just rolled out of bed. Her deep green eyes looked unfocused, her expression…bored? Distracted? Distant would certainly fit.
 
Beside the redhead were two middle-aged individuals each holding themselves with a degree of authority. They probably were the ones hosting this little event. The bespectacled woman to the left of the armless student held herself with style, poise, and control, while the man on her right….did not. From his wild grey hair to his pink glasses, the most awful jacket and tie combination Akira had ever seen, and his boundless energy, he was an eccentric sight to say the least. He seemed to be gushing over the student between them. Even without any context, the contrast between the two extremes was amusing.
 
Curious, Akira stepped closer, listening in as a number of other guests formed a circle around the trio. The armless girl in the messy uniform was introduced by the older woman as Rin Tezuka, the guest of honor and artist whose work lined the walls. Unexpected, but that bit of knowledge did explain a lot. Almost on cue, more visitors gathered around, drawn in by this bit of news, fascinated with the armless painter. Akira paused, frowning as she watched the crowd double around the trio, a cold pit of ice forming in her stomach. Something about this struck her as wrong. Her experience as a lawyer taught her the power of swaying the masses, playing on emotions to get the desired reaction. Her experience as the sister to a disabled girl colored it further. The situation reeked of exploitation.
 
Akira kept her distance, watching the proceedings with a degree of disgust as the questions rolled in. It reminded her of press events she had seen, reporters all scrambling over each other, bombarding the latest subject of the news, trying to get the big scoop before anyone else. It reminded her of a swarm of ants crawling over their spoils, all working to tear it apart to carry back to the hive. They weren’t even particularly bright questions. Did she do her painting with her feet? Well no shit. What did you think? She did it with her tongue?
 
Rin offered no such witty retorts. In fact, she seemed unable to answer at all under the suffocating attention, starting to unsteadily form replies only to be cut off by another question. Akira could see in her eyes the mounting tension, that calm exterior cracking under the pressure. If any in the crowd noticed, they did not act on it. They kept pressing her, oblivious to the effect they were having on her. Rin seemed to lock up, trying to close herself off….and failed.
 
The redheaded girl suddenly fell to her knees, staring ahead with an unfocused gaze. Her breathing heavy and ragged, Rin appeared beaten down and defeated. That shut the questioners up. Rather than do anything to rectify what they had done, though, they remained silent and sill, staring down at her stupidly. One or two asked if she was alright, despite the fact that she clearly was not, unable or unwilling to do anything to help.
 
Akira had enough. If no one else was going to do anything, she would. Glaring and muttering under her breath, she pushed her way forcefully through the gathered onlookers. Crouching down, she put her hand gently on Rin’s shoulder. She felt the girl flinch slightly under her touch, and Rin blinked, emerald eyes meeting ruby.
 
“Come on, kid. Let’s get you outside”, Akira spoke, her voice calm and steady, the hint of a smile tugging at her lips. Rin’s eyes widened slightly, a tremor running through her small frame. Then, steadying herself, the girl gave a subtle nod of her head. At that, Akira carefully wrapped an arm around her shoulders, gripping just under the stub of one arm and hoisting her to her feet. Shielding Rin from the staring masses, the suited blond pushed through towards the door and out into the fresh air outside of the 22nd Corner.
 
Akira snatched up her waiting umbrella as they exited, leaning on it slightly as she took a deep breath of the cool air gratefully, appreciating the transition from noisy conversation to the steady flow of traffic. The sound of cars rolling along a damp street was an oddly soothing one for her. Released from her grasp, Rin leaned against the nearby stone wall, her frantic breathing gradually slowing down.
 
“I couldn’t say anything…”, she spoke softly.
 
Akira turned towards her. This close up, she could see details she hadn’t before, like the dark circles under Rin’s eyes and the way her body looked…frail. Exhausted. She obviously hadn’t been taking good care of herself. When she helped her to her feet, Akira could feel her ribs. She hadn’t been eating well. What had the girl been putting herself through?
 
“It’s alright. Not like they were asking anything important”, she said casually, smiling at the redhead. That hair color couldn’t be natural. Or maybe it was, and she had come across someone with a bit of foreign heritage themselves. It was hard to tell which. “Just take it easy. I’m sure they’ll make do without you for a bit.”
 
Rin blinked, shifting to face the woman in the pinstripe business suit. “What’s that feeling you get when you stand somewhere really high up and you look down and get butterflies in your stomach and the whole world spins like a top?”
 
“Vertigo?”, Akira suggested.
 
“Verti-what?”, Rin asked, a look of confusion on her face.
 
“Vertigo. It’s when you get dizzy and nauseous from high heights. Although it looked to me like you had a panic attack.”
 
“Oh.”
 
The two of them stood there for a long moment, an odd silence passing between them.
 
Rin broke the silence. “Well, it was like that, but it also felt like I was underwater and all sounds were muffled my throat was full of wax and everything was going so fast likeIwasjuststandingstillwhilethetiderushedinand…”
 
“Whoa, whoa! Take a breath. Nice and slow. Iiiiiin and out”, Akira prompted, holding both hands up, palms outward. Rin seemed to have a talent for chaining words together in a machine gun fashion. Still, she got the jist of it. “You just need to relax a bit.”
 
“I think I need more than that”, Rin replied.
 
Akira’s mind flashed back to that painting she was examining, the one which, in her mind, she had already labeled ‘Loneliness’.
 
“You’re from Yamaku, right?”
 
Rin glanced up, eyes wide and curious. “How did you know?’
 
“Lucky guess”, Akira answered dryly, glancing at those empty sleeves, “Also, your friend in there mentioned a nearby high school.”
 
“She’s not my friend”, Rin corrected her rather bluntly. It didn’t sound bitter or angry but rather as if she were stating a simple fact or answering a numerical equation.
 
“Also, my sister goes there, so I know the place. Maybe you’ve met her? She…”
 
“The blind tea lady?” She was a sharp one, although she lacked anything resembling tact. Akira chuckled, finding it a refreshing change of pace. Somehow, she had the feeling that Rin wasn’t the sort to be easily offended.
 
“That’s the one. I’m Akira! Nice to meet you…Rin, isn’t it? I’d offer to shake your hand, buuuut…”, she introduced herself, letting her bad joke trail off. Rin’s only response was to lift the stubs of her arms up and down, her sleeves flopping in the wind like a pair of unusual wings. It was an endearing little gesture, only reinforcing Akira’s prior deduction. “Are you feeling any better now?”
 
Rin gave an emotionless look at the art gallery, probably considering her options. “I don’t want to be asked those questions.”
 
Akira didn’t blame her. She knew what it felt like to be overwhelmed. Posture relaxed, she gave her a confident smile. “Then you don’t have to. How long has it been since you ate?”
 
Rin seemed to ponder this a moment. “Two, no…three days.”
 
Akira blinked. “Three days? What have you been doing with yourself?”
 
“Destroying myself”, Rin answered, as if it was the most ordinary thing in the world.
 
“Obviously”, Akira quipped, one hand in her pocket and the other leaning against the umbrella, “Tell you what: Let’s ditch this and go get something to eat. There’s this café I like close by. My treat.”
 
Rin pondered this for a moment longer before coming to her decision, her stomach’s growl being the audible response. Pushing off the wall, she stepped towards her pinstriped benefactor, offering a sleeve. Giving an exaggerated, gentlemanly bow, Akira accepted, taking the lead with the artist falling in step. This certainly wasn’t according to plan, but hey, the plan was boring anyway. She could have gone back, listened to more dull conversation completely unrelated to the art, but why not talk with the artist herself instead?
 
It was about then that Mother Nature decided to rain on her parade. The dark grey clouds overhead opened up, and droplets of water fell to the Earth. It was a gentle pitter-patter at first, but it didn’t take long for it to become heavy rainfall. Fortunately, Akira was ready. She smoothly deployed the umbrella, holding it as a shield over their heads. Even as the weather took a turn for the worst, that little smirk didn’t leave her, her confidence unshaken. Rin, on the other hand, looked passive, neutrality her default posture. Emerald green eyes looked at the recently formed puddles, ripples expanding outward as rain droplets struck and joined them. Splish, splash, and the dull roar of the whole, covering the world in white noise and obfuscating grey. The young artist put some distance between her and Akira, stepping to the edge of the umbrella’s protection and looking skyward, letting the rain caress her pale face.
 
“You like the rain, don’t you?”, Akira asked, striking up a bit of conversation as the made their way towards their destination. Still looking outwards, Rin nodded her head ever so slightly. “Yes. I like it a lot. I like how soft it makes everything appear. It’s like painting.”
 
Akira mirrored that nod. “I’m more of a sunshine person, myself, but the rain does have its charm.” That wasn’t entirely true. If there was a particular state of nature she preferred, it was at night with a clear sky and a soft, warm breeze.
 
“It’s like the sky is reaching down and painting us. I wonder if it likes what it sees. Did we come out right?”, Rin added. Beat. “It’s bad luck to talk about a painting in progress.”
 
Akira snickered. “Well then, I guess we should leave the sky to its work.”
 
Then they were silent again, absorbing the sensation of the rain. It really was soothing, a nice change from the crowded art gallery. For that matter, it beat the frantic pace of the office. Akira wished she could have these moments more often. Perhaps it was their rarity that made them so precious in the first place. She didn’t know if that was a good or horrible thought. As she pondered this, the café came within sight, and she led Rin to the door. Again, she acted the polite role, opening the door for Rin and gesturing for her to enter. Shaking her umbrella out and folding it up, she stepped inside, joining Rin and finding a table for them.
 
The café tended to be busier in pleasant weather and an earlier time of day, so they had their choice of seating. A window seat was the natural choice, giving them a clear view of the street, the grey scene beyond their welcome shelter. Akira ordered herself a cup of coffee and Rin a glass of water with a straw, their respective meals soon after.
 
Akira sighed in relief as her coffee arrived, sipping that glorious caffeinated goodness. If it wasn’t for coffee, she had no idea how she would have made it these last few years. Could someone die from lack of sleep? She didn’t really want to find out.
 
Her curiosity getting the better of her, the elder Satou sister asked a question that had been nagging at her since the start of their walk, “So Rin, what did you mean back there by destroying yourself? I got the feeling you were being serious.”
 
“I’m always serious”, Rin replied, and the way she stated it made it impossible to tell if she were being serious or sarcastic. She’d probably make a helluva poker player. “They want me to do something. To be something I don’t know I can be. Not as I am.”
 
“You mean a big shot painter? I saw your work in there. I’m no art critic, but I thought it was very good stuff”, Akira told her cheerfully before nibbling on the sandwich that was brought to her.
 
“They needed more paintings for the gallery. But it wasn’t like usual. It was like trying to push a sock through a straw, all fuzzy and stuck”, Rin tried to explain.
 
“I thought art was something that just flowed from you, ya know?”, Akira piped up, “You either feel it or you don’t. Maybe you’re just trying too hard.”
 
Rin looked out the window at the rain still splattering on the world of concrete and steel, making all that indifferent substance soft and dreamlike. “I’ve only ever painted for myself. Painting for everyone is different, and it’s hard, but it’s the one thing I’m good at. They say I should keep painting for everyone, that it’ll take me places, but…”
 
She paused. “I think I’ll have to change myself.”
 
Akira nodded slowly, the pieces coming together from Rin’s scattered thoughts, a familiar story she had heard time and time again. One of those times, she heard it from herself.
 
“Change is a scary thing”, she said, closing her eyes and taking another sip of coffee.
 
“It’s the scariest thing I know”, Rin admitted.
 
Akira could honestly say that she had heard few words in her life that rang as true as that.
 
“It is, but everyone has to face it. Life isn’t like a painting. It doesn’t stand still”, she told the young painter, pushing her plate aside and crossing her fingers together, her full attention on the girl, “Sometimes, you can do what you want to do. The rest of the time, you do what you have to. Yes, you might have to change a little to do that, but change isn’t always bad. You’re at that crazy part of life where you have to choose who you want to be and what you want to do, but you don’t know what choice will satisfy you. You don’t know what the ‘right’ choice is, and before you know it, someone is jabbing you in the back and forcing you forward. You just have to pick a direction, leap, and hope you land where you want.”
 
The lawyer cleared her throat, a bit of red appearing on her cheeks. “Er. Well, that’s what I think.”
 
She wasn’t sure where that came from, that spring of weary life wisdom. But the sight of this talented young woman, lost and afraid, dredged up old feelings. She remembered the fear of facing the future, of change. Naturally, she had charged forward without hesitation, but that didn’t mean the fear wasn’t there. She had her share of sleepless nights.
 
Akira expected Rin to reject what she said outright. Most people her age didn’t care for ‘the way the world is’ speeches, but the redhead surprised her with that steady, calm gaze and the simple question that accompanied it, “What should I do?”
 
Akira felt uncomfortable, twiddling her fingers together briefly. When it came to life direction, she was sure that she was the worst person to turn to for advice. Her strategy for life thus far had been ‘make it up as you go’, and through a fair amount of luck and a modest amount of skill, she hadn’t crashed and burned.
 
“I don’t think you should rush anything. You’ve got time. Think about it carefully. Don’t just throw this opportunity away without first getting a feel for it. Trust me, ya don’t want to turn a good job down. Life without a paycheck is totally uncool. You don’t have to scramble who you are to pay the bills, just…put a part of yourself away for a little while.”
 
She hoped what she said was getting through to the girl. Words really were a clumsy means of communication. If there were some way of beaming what she thought directly into Rin’s head….Well, while she was at it, she might as well wish for the money-printing machine, world peace, and a private space shuttle.
 
Done with their evening meal (what do you call a meal between lunch and dinner?), Akira got to her feet and straightened out her jacket before paying the bill.
 
“So…you want to head back to the exhibition? Looks like the rain is dying down.”
 
Rin looked uncertain, but the expression changed to one of determination, a bit of green fire in her eyes. “I’ll try.”
 
“Atta girl”, Satou spoke with a playful wink.
 
It didn’t take long for them to retrace their steps back to the 22nd Corner, but this time, a short, angry guardian stood at the gates.
 
“Rin! Where have you been? Everyone’s been looking for you!”, the girl with the prosthetic legs called out, her arms crossed and her eyes narrowed in an expression that probably was intended to be intimidating. The effect was anything but.
 
“Everyone?”, Rin asked with wide eyes, “But how did the message go out so fast? Are the satellites watching us?”
 
The friend of Rin’s with boundless energy rolled her eyes. “OK, not everyone. Just everyone at the gallery! We thought you had run off!”
 
“Nahh, just walked”, Akira butted in cheekily, “We went to get some fresh air. Great weather for it.” Smoothly, she moved in, disarmingly offering a hand. “Akira Satou.”
 
“Emi Ibarazaki!”, was the enthusiastic reply, the cheery girl happily taking the offered hand and giving it a firm shake, “Thanks for looking after Rin! I don’t know what she’d do without me.”
 
“Be lost forever, surely”, Rin muttered.
 
Akira snorted in amusement, grinning as she pulled away, “Hey, it was no trouble. Just…have them ease up on the questions. Sheesh.”
 
The look of angry determination returned to Emi, and she planted her fists on her hips, looking like a pint-sized prosthetic superhero. “They won’t get past me!”
 
Now there was a mental image that would linger for a while. A little girl in pigtails fending off the horde of suited guests, a bored-looking Rin watching nearby… Akira chuckled, turning to face Rin again. “Well, it’s been fun, but I really need to get going now. You going to be alright from here?”
 
The artist cocked her head slightly. “I’ll live. No earth-shattering disasters today.”
 
Akira smirked, reaching over to ruffle Rin’s hair. Oddly enough, the girl closed her eyes, nuzzling slightly against her palm. It reminded the lawyer of a cat. “Heh. You’ll do fine. Don’t you worry.” Pausing before she left, Akira acted on impulse, drawing a business card from inside her jacket and offering it to Rin. “And if you need someone to talk to, feel free to call. If I don’t pick up, I’ll get to it as soon as I can.” The difficulty in such a gesture, of course, was the fact that Rin had no hands to take it. Realizing her mistake, she grinned sheepishly and redirected it to Emi.
 
“Er, hang on to this, will ya?”
 
Turning on her heels, Akira Satou walked off, hand raised and waving at them lazily, her step easygoing. “Seeyas!”
 
She wondered if Rin would actually make use of the number she had just been given. The young painter obviously was in need of guidance. She was wrestling with a terrible dilemma hidden under that constant air of indifference. In some ways, she reminded Akira of herself at that age, on the edge of diving into the adult world and unsure if she could remain afloat. In the ways they weren’t alike, Rin was fascinating. Her bizarre method of thinking, the openness through which she saw the world, the skill she had…it was something that Akira didn’t see much of. It was refreshing.
 
It was a shame that Akira was leaving so soon.