Chapter 4: How do you feel?
 
Hisao let out a long yawn as he sat down on the bus bench.
“They worked me hard today.”
As the bus rolled up Hisao slowly got up and paid the fare before slumping down in his seat. ‘Oh right, I promised Rin I would stop by her place tonight. I’ll probably have to cook dinner for her too.’ Hisao let out a sigh and spent the rest of the ride thinking about what he would make her for dinner.
 
Knock. Knock. As usual, Hisao didn’t hear a response from within.
“I’m coming in.”
Hisao gently pushed open the door, looking around the room for Rin. He found her sitting in a chair in front of an easel. The canvas was completely blank and Rin seemed to have a slightly frustrated expression. ‘That’s to be expected, I guess. What am I going to do about her?’
“Rin, are you hungry?”
She didn’t answer for a few moments then turned to look at Hisao, “Sure.”
“I’ll make us some dinner then.”
“Okay.”
Rin started to slowly move her brush across the canvas in fluid confident motions. Hisao watched for a few minutes before pulling some groceries out of the cabinets and fridge for dinner. He watched Rin as he prepared dinner, her painting amazed him. Rather, her focus on what she was doing as if nothing else mattered amazed him. That focus and her need for him to be here is what he was having the most trouble understanding about Rin.
 
“Rin, dinner’s done.”
Rin only gave a nod back to Hisao, showing no intentions of stopping any time soon. Hisao shrugged and slumped his shoulders before taking his plate to the couch and sitting down. He watched Rin paint as he slowly ate his food. An hour passed by before Hisao decided she needed to go ahead and eat.
“Rin, youre food’s already cold.”
“That’s fine.”
“It’s no good to eat it cold. I’ll reheat it for you then you need to eat it.”
Rin gave a frustrated look for a moment before giving in, “Okay.”
Hisao heated the food back up, remade Rin’s plate and brought it to her.
“Where should I… put it?
“On the counter.”
Rin got up as she said that and moved to a seat at the island. Hisao put the plate down and took a seat opposite Rin as she ate. Hisao let out a long yawn before putting his head down on the counter.
“Do you have work tomorrow?”
“No, it’s my day off thankfully.”
 
Rin finished her food and without a sound went back to painting. Hisao watched as she instantly gained tunnel vision of her painting. ‘Guess I’ll watch her for a bit.’ Hisao slowly moved to the couch without saying anything to distract Rin, not that it would. He watched her like last time until he dozed off again.
 
“I finished.”
Hisao slowly got up to the sound of her voice. He made some grumbles and nonsensical sounds as he stood up and looked to Rin.
“How’d it turn out?”
Rin just looked toward it then back at Hisao expectantly. Hisao decided it was best to cut the conversation and just look at it himself. The painting was of him, he stood in shock as he looked at it. It wasn’t like her usual paintings that he couldn’t tell what was going on, it was a simple portrait of him. He didn’t know how to respond to Rin showing him it, he could only stare at the painting with a blank stare. As he stared at it he noticed that the portrait showed him with a grim expression, he had dark circles under his eyes. His eyes seemed to be hallow, void of any emotion whatsoever.
“Is this how you see me?”
“Yes.”
“Why do I look so, empty?”
“You look that way. Not just that you but the you you are.”
“Isn’t that sad?”
“I don’t know. It’s just how you look.”
Hisao stared at Rin with a pained expression. ‘Do I really look this way? Do I not smile anymore?’
“Rin, have you seen me smile since I came back to this town?”
“No. I wish you would smile more. I like it when you are happy.”
Hisao froze. His eyes started to well up with tears. ‘She had said something similar to me back at Yamaku. That I looked grim and never smiled. Why do I never smile?’ At this point he started to cry. He didn’t sob, or sniffle, tears simply strolled down his cheeks while he held a blank expression.
“I’m sorry Rin. I should smile more. I like being around you too. Even if I’m not smiling it makes me happy.”
Rin didn’t say a word, she simply walked up to him and pushed her body against his.
“I can’t hug you, Hisao.”
He slowly wrapped his arms around her small body. Hisao smiled and leaned his head against hers.
“I know.”
They stayed like that for a long time, not moving. Hisao eventually stopped crying and loosned his grip on Rin.
“I’m sorry. That was weird, it’s been a long time since I’ve cried.”
“It’s okay.”
“I didn’t mean to cause so much drama for you. I’m going to go home.”
“Hisao, no.”
“What do you mean ‘no’?”
“Stay.”
“Rin?”
“I like it when you are here.”
Hisao paused for a moment studying Rins expectant expression and with a sigh,
“Okay. But I have work tomorrow so I have to leave early.”
“That’s fine.”
With that Rin went to her bed and layed down. ‘Guess I’ll sleep on the couch then.’ Hisao looked around for some covers and couldn’t find any.
“Rin, do you have any covers?”
“No.”
Hisao let out a sigh and looked around to see if there was anything he could use as a substitute. He found nothing. With another sigh he looked to the couch, ‘well at least it folds out.’ He took the cushions off and looked around for a place to put them. Again, he found nothing. He sat them on the ground, folded out the couch, set the alarm on his watch, and layed down on it. ‘It’s gonna be too cold for me to get a good night’s sleep.’ With that thought he slowly fell asleep, curled in a ball.
 
Beep. Beep. Beep.
“mmmm five mo’er min’s.”
“ughhhh”
Hisao groaned as he moved to turn off his watch, but on the way his hand hit something soft. At first he tried to push it out of the way then he opened his eyes and sat up.
“Rin?!”
“mmmmm”
Hisao’s heart started to pound as he noticed the Rin curled up close to him on the couch. ‘What is Rin doing here?!?!’ Hisao stared at the sleeping Rin as he calmed down.
“Rin, why are you on the couch?”
Rin finally decided Hisao wouldn’t let her sleep. “I couldn’t sleep over there, so I came here.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
Rin just stared at him with her eyes half open blankly. Hisao looked at his watch again, ‘I’m going to be late if I stay here any longer.’
“I’m off to work Rin.”
“Will you come back?”
“Yeah, I’ll be back after work.”
“Okay.”
With that Rin went back to sleep and Hisao laughed before putting on his shoes and leaving.