Chapter 7
 
It's a week and a half later now, Thursday of the next week, to be exact.
 
During this time, I haven't seen Hisao at all, which has never happened since he started attending the school.  Either he's trying to avoid Hanako and I, or he simply isn't here.  I discover that it's the latter when Shizune tells me that he asked for an extension of his vacation based on being too far from the school.  Apparently, she describes, he went along with someone to their house to spend the vacation and hasn't been back.  I'm not acutely aware of any friends of his besides Hanako and I.  I hope he's doing alright.  It would seem that he's given up on Hanako, not much unlike I had to, so I'm not surprised, but it still adds discomfort to my mind.
 
I still have to tell Hanako about my job offer with my parent's company.  I'm not sure how she'll take it.  If I immediately tell her I'm not going, she'll likely assume she's the one at fault, that she's bringing me down, though I'd hardly think of it that way.  If I directly tell her I am going... among other things, that would be a complete lie.  I have to approach this with the utmost of care.  Today has to be the day, I felt compelled to delay it but beyond this point, it would only be detrimental to have the due date of my response to my parents closer than it is now, which is some time this weekend.
 
At the end of the school day, Hanako is already outside the door to my classroom, calling out to me as I exit.  Hoping she didn't skip classes, I politely greet her and we continue out of the building and to the dorms.
 
When we arrive at the front of my door, I stop.  "Hanako, would you like to join me for some tea in my room?"
 
"Y-yeah, I'd like that," she answers without much hesitation.  I reach for my key and open the door, stepping in with her in tow.
 
I set up the familiar low table in the center of the room, and as I begin to prepare the tea, I hear Hanako shuffle around as she sits down and situates herself to a state of comfort.
 
After a bit of usual small-talk, followed by a period of silence, I take a breath and decide to bring up the matter at hand.
 
"Hanako, there's something I need to tell you."
 
"Y-yes?" she asks expectantly.
 
"It's about my parents and their corporation.  They offered me a job, and invited me to return to Scotland after graduation to assist them."
 
I faintly hear Hanako quickly gulp down the tea currently in her mouth, and less faintly, the teacup being briskly placed on the saucer.
 
"What... y-you're... going away?"
 
"I haven't decided yet.  I still have my possible future in Japan to consider."
 
She doesn't seem to read any indecisiveness in my statement.  I can hear the early stages of hyperventilation rising up in her.  It feels like, on my side, I've said all that I can say, though I must still say something more.
 
Hanako takes the initiative, instead, a heart-rending sadness in her voice.  "No... NO.... NOOOOOO!!  It's all my fault... dammit.... dammitdammitdammitdammit..."  I can clearly hear her entire self squirm and shuffle against the carpeted floor and the table.
 
"Hanako... how could you say something like that.  Nothing's your fault."  I hope she can hear me amongst her sudden episode.
 
"B-but... it is!  I'm worthless!  I p-pushed you away and now you're going to leave!  It's all my fault... I brought all of this on!!!  I never wanted this!  I don't want to lose you, too!!"
 
She's now crying her heart out, likely loud enough that the adjacent rooms could hear her, if not more.
 
Hanako's pain, her absolute despair now, the grimace that's taken over her face, the floods of tears that are likely streaming down her cheek before being flung about the room.  One doesn't need to see to know that all of these are present.  It's another variant on the same situation, Hanako's very sanity is wracked, and I'm left there still, trying to decide what to do.  At this point, she has to be aware that I'm feeling bad about this situation, and the thought's probably only making her feel worse.
 
My feelings are welling up too, in the form of tears ready to escape my eyes.  I must reach out to her now.  This is my only chance.  I must bring out that which I've been holding back.  I can't hope to treat her like a child, I must bring us together.  I must.
 
I make my move with a simple question.  "Hanako... how do you feel about me?"
 
Hanako halts her crying, then sniffles and replies, "Wh-what?"
 
"It's a simple question, Hanako," I say back to her, my mouth turning into a smile.
 
"I... I... ahhhhgh.... I d-don't k-knoow."
 
Her guard is down.  I strike.
 
"Alright Hanako, then, allow me to tell you how I feel about you.  I feel like I was lost before I met you.  I think about your voice and your touch every day and it gives me a feeling of warmth that I've never experienced before in my life.  You're insatiably kind to anyone you meet, even if you're shy about it, you even beat me in that regard."  I manage a soft chuckle and continue.  "Every day with you is heaven.  You're the light in my life."  I slowly shuffle my way around the table, a corner of it being the only thing between her and I now.  "Now, tell me Hanako, how do you feel about me?"
 
"I... uhh...  wahh... wh-why...?"
 
"Why what?  Didn't I just tell you?" I scoot even closer to her, as close as I can manage without risking bumping into her.  She doesn't back away.  I reach out my right hand, intent on contact with her cheek to guide myself.  As I feel her soft, warm, dew-kissed cheek on my fingertips, then my palm, I can feel her shiver wildly, but then calm down.
 
Not wasting any time, I raise my backside and move my head forward.  I hit right on the mark, my lips coming into contact with Hanako's.  Before she can react, I pull back a couple of centimeters, my message fitfully sent.
 
"Hanako..." I say to her, my voice softened.  "I don't want to lose you, either.  I love you, Hanako.  Ever since I first met you."
 
I hear her voice again as my palm can feel her face turn away from me.  "I'm... no... I'm n-not worth all of that."
 
"I disagree," I respond promptly, "and there's not a damn thing you could say or do that would convince me otherwise."
 
She remains there, silent, trembling.  There's something going on in her mind right now.  Something I want to bring out.
 
I move myself completely onto her, wrapping my arms around her body in a tight embrace, while I meet my lips with hers again, more forcefully this time, as if to stifle her sadness.
 
After a second, she pushes me slightly away from her, but very gently.  I release my hold on her.  "L-Lilly... I ahhh..." she manages to voice out softly, "I'm... I'm so sorry!!!  I-I-I..."  She returns to her crying, apologetic state.  I'm not going to let it win over me, not this time.
 
"Don't dwell, Hanako.  I'm yours now.  We're alone here.  Ju-"
 
"I-I love you too, Lilly!" she blurts out, as abruptly as can be expected of her.
 
My smile lengthens, my cheeks burning hot with passion.  "There... it's easy, right, Hanako?"
 
"You... really l-loved me... all this time... e-even..."
 
"I would never doubt you, Hanako.  Believe the same for me.  That's all I ask."
 
A forceful sniffle comes from her.  "Okay Lilly... I'm... I-I'm so h-happy right now."
 
"I couldn't be happier myself, being so close to you," I reply.
 
For a long moment, we sit still there, myself observing every detail of her possible with my available senses, herself likely looking over my own tear-strewn features.  The stillness is broken by her.  I suddenly feel her sweet breath flow against my face moments before feeling her lips on mine once more.  I struggle to avoid coughing out of surprise, instead, wrapping my arms around her again as I return her kiss.  The kiss intensifies, both of us playing the aggressor now, lips sliding against lips, as if trying to find a comfortable place to remain but finding a more comfortable place each time.  I press my body against hers, lowering her to the floor with me on top.  The table is bumped by my foot, teacups clattering and spilling.  It causes Hanako to break her mouth away from mine, but I'm not phazed.  I press even harder, refusing both us and our lips to stay apart for more than a second.  
 
I think of how to move forward for a moment, and act by moving my right hand to her hip, stroking it up her slender, still-clothed body, letting it come to rest on her collar.
 
"Oh dear, Hanako... I don't think I can pull myself away from you," I whisper to her as our lips part again, faking a worrysome expression.
 
"I-I... s-same..." Hanako responds, barely able to utter out just that.
 
With that said, I caress the collar of her blouse, feeling for the button and pushing it loose.  I continue down, until it is entirely unbuttoned.  With one swift move of my hands, I pull it open before me.
 
"E-eeek!" Hanako squeaks.  I wrap an arm behind her and hold her against me, as I finish removing her blouse and move my hand toward her bra.
 
"Hanako... would you help me as well?"  I ask sincerely.  I feel her hair stroke against my arm as she nods.  I easily unhook her bra and let it fall to the floor, then lean back a little, pulling myself away slightly.  Trembling, slender fingers come in contact with my collar, feeling around, toucing unimaginably softly.  She begins to unbutton my own blouse.  The feeling makes me tremble as well.
 
Hanako unhooks my bra, with similar apprehensiveness, and I curl my shoulders, letting velvet glide off my skin.  Deciding to skip a step, I scoot back from her slightly, only to begin to lower my skirt.  I wonder what Hanako thinks about what she's seeing now.  As if reading my mind, she speaks again.
 
"You're... so beautiful..." she says, less nervously than before.
 
"Am I?"  I let out another chuckle, "well, here I am, I'm all yours Hanako," I coo to her as I kick off my shoes and slowly strip my knee-high stockings off, trying to give her a good show.  My hands reach for my panties.
 
"Ehhh... o-oh no!  T-the door's not locked!"
 
I laugh at her sheepishness to getting caught.  "Nothing to worry about Hanako, just attend to it."
 
"Mm," she pipes as she gets up and heads to the door.  I take this oppurtunity to move onto her bed and finish removing my underwear.  Lastly, I almost forget to remove the ribbon in my hair.  Hanako returns and sits next to me.  I place my hand on her lap, still feeling fabric.
 
"Looks like you're not finished yet," I say to her.
 
"Y-yeah."  She scoots away from me, followed by the sound of fabric against skin.  "O-okay Lilly, now we're even."
 
Without another word, I turn to her and advance on her again, with my right hand, landing initially on the left side of her slender stomach.  I allow my fingers to wander upwards, stroking gently as they go.  They come to an even softer wall, and I move my hand up, resting it on her breast while gauging her reaction.  She's still trembling, but it feels... different now, as if she's afraid she could be too happy, instead of the other way around.  I lift my hand from her breast and continue to stroke along her collarbone, taking in all of her that I possibly can.  I've touched Hanako before, whether it be our arms interlocked or a full-on hug, but never anything like this, never with anyone.  She's the first person besides myself that I've ever seen, truly.
 
My hand continues to my left, or the right side of her own body.  Suddenly, she flinches backwards.  "No!  D-Don't!"
 
I know what she's worried about.  It's far too late for hesitation.  My fingers continue undaunted.  Suddenly her skin takes on a drastically different feel.  Grooves and ridges everywhere, splaying in random sizes and directions across her body's right side like a wild forest.  Even this part of her, I want to know of it all, I want to explore every single perfection and imperfection.
 
"You're... so amazingly beautiful," I utter under my breath.
 
The entire feeling of exploring Hanako's body drives me wild in no time.  I can't hold back anymore, even if I wanted to.  I can already feel myself dripping.
 
"Hanako... I must have you."
 
"Y-yes... I'm yours too... L-Lilly."
 
It's hard to tell who moves forward first.  Our arms lock around each other at nearly the same time behind our respective backs, lips locked again.  I open my mouth slightly and taste her lips with my tongue.  When I feel her lips part, I disregard whether or not it may be a gasp, and bury my tongue into the opening.  My breathing picks up, her sweet taste is like nothing I could ever hope to experience.  She responds, our tongues dancing.  Her breathing matches mine, gusts of breath clashing between our noses.
 
I break away from the kiss as passion gives way to thoughts of action.  I reach under her left leg and lift it, her smell intensifying as I reveal its source.  Without hesitation, I cup her entire region in my hand, rubbing up and down softly, before I allow my fingers to explore it in detail.  Everything is familiar, yet new at the same time.  Eventually my fingers find their way to her labia, and amidst her wetness, I'm able to slip two fingers in.  Hanako responds, her insides tensing against me, her breathing quite audible now.
 
I continue to caress her with my fingers, eventually changing to a rhythm, my fingers moving back and forth inside of her, my body moving similarly.  Hanako seems to take the hint and I moan softly as I feel her fingers come in contact with the most sensitive part of my body.  I pull myself out of her, and try to find a better position for the both of us.  I grind my body against hers, lifting my own left leg.  Our parts push against each other.  I push more.  More.  Every gasp that escapes her mouth as I press against her causes me to move even faster.
 
Hanako cries out, wrapping her arms around me tightly as she stops breathing suddenly and gives off yet another new set of trembles.  Seconds later, I'm driven to do the same.
 
Our bodies relax, our breathing slows gradually.  I'm now laying slightly on top of her, head pointed to the direction of hers, herself undoubtedly looking back at me.  We remain like that, silent for many minutes.
 
Hanako speaks up.  "L-Lilly..."
 
"Yes?"
 
"Do... a-are... you really going to leave..?"
 
I shake my head for her.  "I wouldn't dream of it.  The thing I want most in life is you.  Nothing else matters."
 
"B-but... I feel... guilty.."
 
I plant a quick peck on her lips.  "I'm not doing this for you.  I'm doing this for us.  I want to share my life with you, Hanako.  Maybe one day, I can return to Inverness and bring you with me, or maybe we'll stay here in Japan.  It doesn't matter."
 
Hanako giggles, the sound quickly increasing the intensity of my smile, before finishing my thought for me.
 
"F-for now... this is our time."
 
[End]
 
Dedicated to Light Satanome