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>There was trouble falling asleep last night.
>The Aryan Beauty doesn't like your hat.
>She tried to have you take it off.
>Well, you didn't.
>True loves triumphs highschool crushes any day.
>Too bad you can't make babies with hats.
>Oh well, she'll get over it, and you can continue to escape the friend zone.
 
>Wake up in the morning like an overused song lyric.
>Reach for the glorious hat of glory.
>It feels... stiff.
>You didn't wash it with something you weren't supposed to, did you?
>Nah, you never wash your hat.
>Hats don't get dirty.
>Looking over at your nightstand, you see... a fedora.
>What the fuck.
>Where is your hat?
 
>Next to the fedora is a note.
>"Dearest Norman, I've noticed that you are quite attached to your current hat, and will not take it off. I understand personal fashion, and worry not! For I have taken it upon myself to make sure your style and needs are taken care of. I have removed your hat and given you a nice, fashionable, new fedora that I made! You will look just PRECIOUS! I understand you don't like your hair being exposed, and there is no need to thank me. Ta-ta! -Rarity"
>Goddamnit.
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