Oct. 7
I woke up today cuddling something. It was that long bodyish pillow I have. I know I didn't fall asleep with it so I must have done it when I was asleep. When I asked what you were gonna do next, and you asked if I
was gonna go after camera girl I wanted to say no. I don't want camera girl. I want you. How could I go about dating someone else when I still love you. Before we were together I just kinda drifted through my days, it was wake up, go to school, work,  sleep. Just doing things because the had to be done. Nothing to really look forward day to day.
 
Then I fell in love. I had someone who made me want to do things with myself. Now I had a goal in life. I had to be with you. So now its back to the old. Just drifting. Heart broken and drifting. Its odd...
I have been thinking Misha as my waifu again. I don't really know why, I've just been growing fond of her once again. Maybe a longing for the old day? Who knows... I'm still unsure whether you thought it could never work, just due to the difficulties, or if you honestly lost interest in me and just couldn't bare to tell me that you no longer loved me.
 
My wrist is looking better. That happened when you were first thinking about us, huh? You didn't show
much sympathy, and to be honest, that hurt more than having my flesh ripped off. As I go to bed its just another night I wish you were here...