>You've come to take it for granted.
>The beauty that your cousin has grown into.
>You loved her like a sister, growing up.
>But now, when you look at her, you feel a longing in your heart.
>You wonder idly: when did she get so pretty?
>It wasn't so long ago that she was an lanky and overtall preteen, and before that a skinny, gaptoothed kid.
>All of that was gone, replaced by a slender and graceful young woman.
>You know it was wrong.
>God, it was so wrong.
>But you couldn't help but wonder.
>Wonder how marvelous it would be if you could take her soft, smooth hands in yours while walking through the summer woods you so loved.
>Watch the leaves fall from autumn trees, her head finding rest on your shoulder.
>Hold her close on a cold winter night, feeling comfort in each other's warm embrace.
>Feel her velvet lips brush against your cheek on a cool spring evening.
>Ecstasy.
>And pure fantasy.
>You know it can never be.
>She would never see you that way.
>Even if she did, your family would never accept it.
>The two of you would become unwelcome among the people you cared about most.
>You could never do that do her.
>So you watch, and you admire her in secret.
>Her smile, such a sweet and kind smile, will only ever be yours in passing.
>Yours to experience momentarily, never to keep.