>Day SCREEEEEARRGH in Equestria >Walking through ponyville. >Pick up a cute little pony. >Ask her for directions. "SCREARRRGH!" >She starts screaming. >Try to hush her and let her know it's okay. "RARRRRGHARAGHBLARAARGH!" >She goes quiet with fear, and then feints. >Great, that's not safe. >Gotta take the poor little pony to the doctor, blacking out can lead to health problems. >Turn to all the other terrified little ponies around you. >Ask them if they know where the doctor is, or, failing that, might be able to take your friend to the hospital for you. "REEEEERREEEYARRRGHEEGHARRGHREEEEYRAYRAYYYGHRAWRUH!" >They panic even more as you realize you just smacked your tail into one of their houses. >You apologize and check on the poor little pony in your hand. >She's still out cold. >You mosey on down the street, trying to avoid further collateral damage but of course ponyville isn't giant-monster-friendly so you hit a few things on the way. >You spot what is obviously the local hospital and start towards it when another figure rises up behind it. >Goddamnit, who invited this asshole? >Mothra starts wailing in your direction. >"Hey, AnonZilla, what up?" "Oh, hey, Mothra, how's it hanging?" >"Just doing my bug thing, you know what I'm saying? Oh, hey, you playing with ponies, bro? What are you, five? You're a massive faggot, aren't ya? Hahahahahahaha!" >She stats tearing into the hospital building, causing a new eruption of screams. >Damnit you hate Mothra. >You look down to your helpless little pony, still unconscious, and run a finger over her mane. >She's so adorably soft, hopefully she'll be okay soon. >You put her down carefully and leer at that winged jerkwad, still terrorizing the little horses. >You crack your knuckles and charge your atomic breath. >Time to go beat on the bug. >Again.   >To anyone who may have been dumb or unfortunate enough to stick around, the following conversation would have just been a series of SCREEEARGH's and WOOO WOOOOO's from the giant lizard and giant moth respectively. >But to you, it was much more. >You stomped right up to that clothes-eating bastard. "Hey, Mothra!" >The moth monster abruptly looks up as you encroach. >"Yeah, dawg?" "They're mine!" >Whatever retort it might make was cut off as you cold clocked her. >Your fist slammed into the bug's fuzzy face. >She reeled, crashing through part of the building and drawing more than a few yells. >You pushed forward and by the time Mothra recovered you were on it again. >You picked the moth up in both arms as it tried to flex its wings to get airborn. >"Yo, what are you doing, AnonZilla?!" >You tossed that punk into a small copse of trees. >Unfortunately the shock had won off and your nemesis was ready to go at it for real. >Mothra goes skyward, fluttering for all its worth and begins yelling various obscenities at you. >It began to flap its wings angrily and its antennae began to glow. >You remember this move. >You spat atomic death at your adversary and at the same time it fired a great beam from its antennae. >When the resulting explosion knocked you on your ass, you knew it was about to get real. >"Hahahaha," Mothra gloated, "I've gotten stronger since we last fought, and I know you don't have that much nuclear energy with you today; you can't fire your beam again for a while, but I sure can!" >There's that giant laser moth beam glow again. >You swiped up a tree and pelted her with it before she can charge up all the way, eliciting a fresh set of curses. >"If I had hands I'd flip you off, AnonZilla!" "While you're thinking about doing that... tree!" >You toss tree after tree, forcing the moth to take evasive action. >"Stop throwing trees at me, asshole!" >Of course you continued anyway, because fuck Mothra. >Unfortunately after your sixth throw, you reached down and found nothing in your grasp.   >"Run out of trees? Well how about some laser be-" >You had waited long enough. >You gave the bug some more of your trademark "atomic breath in the face" maneuver. >The bug rushed you and you were thrown into a pitched wrestling match. >It was true, Mothra had certainly gotten stronger than before, each beat of its wings caused a wind to blow through the town. >The repeated ass kickings must have toughened it up for once. >However, as you managed to get your foe into a headlock, you realized that if this continued, the ponies would be blown away. >You toss the bug down the street, only to realize that this was a horrible move. >It was in the direction of the little pony from earlier. >You looked past the dazed moth to see her standing up, right off to its side. >The terror on her face as the bug turned its head to look at her made your spines crackle. >"Oh, who do we have here?" >You break into a dead sprint at the sound of the pony briefly crying out. >Tragically, you are too late. >Mothra takes into the air again, dangling the tiny, frantic horse. >"Got your toy! Hahahaha-no, stop struggling, I'm going to drop you!" >You squint and sure enough, your little pony was doing her darnedest to put up a fight. >You glance to your side and find a rather unassuming building that looks vaguely like a carousel. >Oh look, it's your best friend in any situation; a throwable object! >You lean down and peer inside the building. >A tiny unicorn squeals and cries out. >"Giant lizard!" >A small green and purple dragon thing in front of her flexes. >"Why yes, I have hit a growth spurt lately, Rarity." >A familiar scream reminds you that you don't have time for this, and grab both occupants, taking them out as you go for your real prize. >"My boutique!" the unicorn cries, and you grunt an apology. "SCRARUEERGH" >Of course the town starts panicking again. >You shrug it off and take aim.   >You aim and toss that house like a boulder. >Which is to say, you toss it like you toss everything else. >Really hard. >The pony, still screaming and squirming in the giant moth's grip, suddenly goes still. >"House!" >Mothra takes a second to react to the pony's warning and by then, it is too late. >The building collides with the flying asshole and you dart forward. >Out of the wreckage of a thousand fabrics, wood splinters, dresses and giant, falling bug, you spot a blur of live movement. >Your pony! >You lunge forward, diving to catch her. >You come to a screeching halt, a trench of dirt kicked up in your trail. >You carefully open the cage formed by your hands to find a little pony, scratched up and shaken from her ordeal, but alive. >You smile and bring her close for a heartfelt apology. "I'm so sorry for all this trouble miss pony, this must have been a terrible ordeal. I'd like to make it up to you somehow and-" >Of course she hears something totally different. "Rarrgh raooorgh; SCRAEERGH SKREERH RARRGH RORRR REEEEGH SCRAAGH RAARGH!" >You're left holding an unconscious pony once more. >Oh, right, need a doctor. "SKREEGH-RAWWRG RAAH?!" >The few bystanders who gaped at your display of affection are sent screaming again. >These townfolk are very unhelpful. >After a good thirty minutes of searching and polite requests for help, you just grab Mothra and haul the moron home. >Hours later, a certain pony will wake up with a neatly brushed mane and tail, a mild headache, and a handwritten letter. >She picks it up gingerly and reads its contents. "SKREEEEERARGH! XOXOXOXO" - AnonZilla