1/7 >You are a dumb anon. >How dumb? >You adopted a fluffy pony runt. >Saw him at the breeder's. >The mother fluffy had rejected him. >The breeder was going to let him die. >He was so pathetic & helpless. >Squirming around on the birthing towel. >Shivering; cold without his momma to keep him warm. >Hungry; crying for milk he would never get. >Scared; he didn't know why he was rejected. >You had to help him. >Breeder shakes his head. >"That runt didn't get enough oxygen or nutrition in the womb." >"Even if he lives he'll have a lifetime of problems." >"That runt will probably be a retard...more than usual that is." >"It's best to just let nature run its course." >You didn't listen. >You're a dumb anon, remember? >The breeder gave you the runt for free. >You bottle fed him with fluffy formula. >You kept him warm with an electric heating pad. >You gave him all the affection a momma would. >Against all odds your fluffy runt lived.   >Fluffy is an adult now. >He actually has a reasonably normal brain. >Still dumb as a rock...but no more than a normal fluffy. >He does have problems though. >All food makes fluffy violently sick.   2/7 >You've tried everything. >Human food...fluffy food...organic food...grass & grain. >Liquid food paste...nutritional shakes. >Everything gives fluffy terrible stomach cramps. >He pukes a lot. >Meals are a time of fear for fluffy. >He knows eating will make him sick for hours. >The veterinarian can't do anything. >"Your fluffy pony was a runt.  His digestive tract never properly developed." "Is there anything I can do, Doc?" >"Euthanize him. Go back & get a normal fluffy pony." >You don't euthanize your beloved fluffy. >You continue to try everything. >Every single brand of fluffy chow on the market. >No luck...everything makes fluffy sick. >It breaks your heart. >Fluffy can not even eat spaghetti. >You have to force him to eat, just to get some nutrition into his little body. >Fluffy cries and whimpers every time. >"Nuu wan' sickies, daddee...pwease nu make fwuffy eat!" "Come on, just a few bites, boy." >Fluffy chokes a few bites down. >It always ends the same. >Fluffy hunched over in pain, crying and clutching his gut. >"Whhhaaaa! Tummy huwt! Fwuffy nu wike sickies!" >All you can do is hold him in your lap and stroke his fluff. >Many pairs of pants have been ruined by puke & diarrhea.   3/7 >It's just like any other day. >You spoon out today's meal into fluffy's bowl. >Trying a new brand...Fluffy Chunks. >Grain mash & vegetables pressed into bite sized pieces. "Come on boy, it's time for dinner." >You have to pull fluffy out of his hiding place under the couch. >"Whhaaa!Pwease daddee! Nu wan' sickies! Nu wan' eat nummies!" "Come on, you need to have something.  Just a few bites." >Whimpering, fluffy takes a nervous bite. >You go to get towels, in case he pukes. >Come back. >Fluffy's bowl is empty. "Did you eat it all, boy?" >Fluffy pony nods happily. >"Nummies good! Fwuffy wike!" >Hot damn! He's not getting sick! >Watch him for the next few hours. >Fluffy plays happily, shows no sign of distress. >For the first time in ages fluffy goes to bed happy.   >Next morning. >No puke, no poop accidents in his bed. "Are you feeling okay?" >"Fwuffy fewl happy! Pwease mowe good nummies?" >Of course he can have more. >Give him the rest of the can. >Fluffy devours his breakfast with gusto. >"Yay! Nu sickies! Fwuffy wuv dis nummies!" >It's a winner...you have to get more of this. >Look at the can. >Fluffy Chunks.   4/7 >Stop at the store on the way home. >Same place you bought the Fluffy Chunks. >Hmmm...only 2 cans left.  Must be popular. >The next two days are happy. >Fluffy pony eats like never before and doesn't get sick. >He has energy to run and play. >Gotta get more of this food for him. >The store still doesn't have any more in stock. >Find a manager. "Excuse me; when will you be getting more Fluffy Chunks in stock?" >"Sorry, our chain was only carrying that on a trial basis. We're not getting any more." >This is a problem. >Check numerous other stores. >Nobody has even heard of it. >Go home, fish the can out of the garbage. >Bring it with you to show employees. >"No, sorry, we don't carry that." >That night, fluffy begs for Fluffy Chunks. "I'm sorry boy, I'm trying to find more." >Whimpering, he has a few bites of normal Fluffy Chow. >As expected, fluffy gets sick & miserable.   >Travel to 25 stores that weekend. >Nobody carries Fluffy Chunks. >You scan the can label. >Post a question on fluffyowners.net >Wait for responses. >Meanwhile, your fluffy cries and begs for nummies that won't make him sick.   5/7 >A hit...somebody answered your question! >Fluffy Chunks came from a factory in Ohio. >Poster provides an e-mail & physical address. >Maybe you can buy Fluffy Chunks direct from the factory. >You e-mail them. >Two days go by...no response. >You write to the physical address. >You get no reply. >Every night fluffy cries "Pwease Fwuffy Chunks?" "Sorry boy...I'm trying real hard." >Every night poor fluffy gets sick from regular food.   >Enough of this shit. >Ohio is only 700 miles away. >Put fluffy in his pet carrier. >Road-trip time. >Fluffy is excited...looks forward to finally getting Fluffy Chunks. >It's slow going with a sick fluffy pony. >Frequent stops for puke & diarrhea. >The journey takes two days. >GPS guides you to the address. >Fluffy is super-excited. >"Almoss dhewe daddee? Almoss time fow Fwuffy Chunks nummies?" "Almost there, boy." >Round the corner. >Your heart crashes to the floor. >The factory is a burned out ruin.   6/7 >Fluffy is crying...he doesn't understand. >"Why nu Fwuffy Chunks? >You sift thru the ruins. >Find a few empty cans of Fluffy Chunks...yeah, this is the place. >This isn't over. >Even if the factory is gone somebody must have the recipe. >You'll make Fluffy Chunks yourself if you have to! >Track down a worker from the factory. >Old fat lady on a Rascal scooter. >"Oh yeah. That factory brought a lot of jobs to town." "What about the recipe?" >"But then the fire burned it all down." "So who has the recipe?" >"The owners decided to take the insurance money and bail." "But is there a place I can find the recipe?" >"Nobody rebuilt the factory. Lotta folks lost their jobs." "Lady...the recipe!?" >"The recipe? Oh, that burned up in the fire. >"The head nutritionalist moved to Florida & died in a boating accident." "Wait...you mean?" >"The recipe for Fluffy Chunks is lost forever."     7/7 >Walk out to the car sadly. >Sit down in driver's seat. >Fluffy scrambles over and paws at you. >"Nice wady gif Fwuffy Chunks?" "No, boy.  She didn't have any Fluffy Chunks." >"Who haf? Fwuffy wuv Fwuffy Chunks. Nu gif sickies." "I'm sorry boy. There's no more Fluffy Chunks, and there never will be again." >Fluffy looks up at you with big wet eyes. >"Nu Fwuffy Chunks ebew?" he sobs. "Never again." >Fluffy cries, understanding what this means. >"Daddee, why bad fing habben? Why nu mowe Fwuffy Chunks?" "I don't know, boy."   >Fluffy lives another 18 months. >You try every new food on the market. >Nothing works. >Fluffy is sick every day until he dies. >You put his ashes in an empty Fluffy Chunks can.   >Go to the fluffy pony breeder. >See what he has in stock. >Plenty of happy young fluffies want to be adopted. >One mare has just given birth. >She delivered a healthy blue filly, and a runt. >As the healthy filly suckles the runt tries to squirm into momma's fluff. >She rejects it...kicks it away. >The runt squeaks and cries; cold, scared, hungry. >It is ignored.  The momma focuses on her good baby. >This time you turn away too. >Let nature run its course. >You're not such a dumb anon anymore.