>"What? What are you talking about?"
    >Oh shit.
    >Your phone, having just vibrated, has brought you this message.
    >What on earth did you just send to your waifu, Sunset?
    >You quickly look back at your chat history.
    >Fuck.
    >You said THAT?
    >Goddamn, you're blasted.
    >Your dad, drinker he is, decided tonight was the night to introduce you to a cadre of red wines.
    >Clearly it wasn't good for your communication skills.
    >The phone vibrates in your hand.
    >[MESSAGE FROM: RARITY]
    >"ANON!! Why, I NEVER!..."
    >Shit.
    >You look at your texts to her.
    "FUUUUUCK..."
    >Such is the consequence of too many glasses of cabrinet savignon...
    >Your phone vibrates yet again.
    >Oh thank god, it's only Sunset again.
    >"What do you mean 'I have to choose'?"
    >Your phone vibrates again from Rarity.
    >"What do you mean 'I have to choose'?"
    >Suddenly it all makes sense.
    >Both these bitches were talking to you.
    >But, you knew that both these bitches were talking to other fuckers too.
    >So, time to stick to your guns.
    >You text them both the same message.
    "It's either me or him!"
    >You put down your phone and wait.
    >Of course, you didn't know who "him" was in either case, but you knew there was one.
    >Your phone vibrates enthusiastically.
    >Picking it up, you see a text from both Sunset and Rarity.
    >They say the same thing.
 
    >"...Well, I choose YOU!"
 
    "Fuuuuuuck..."
 
    >your face when two bitches call your bluff at the same time.